[Thread Game] Post the punchline, just the punchline, to your favorite joke

I don't want to rewrite it but the basic setup is two people lying under the stars asking what the constellation means.

Mine:
"God damnit, I missed."
 
I don't want to rewrite it but the basic setup is two people lying under the stars asking what the constellation means.
Specifically Holmes and Watson, lying on their backs and talking about the vast starry sky over their heads.

I don't know as I have a "favorite" joke, but we'll see how many know this one: "Gomer's Pile."

--Patrick
 
Or this one.
Well, sadly, it's a joke where the joke is sort of lost if you know the punchline going in. And it's also...;a particular brand of comedy. it may, in fact, be against the forum rules. Still, I'll include it in a spoiler :)

Rabbit didn't have much to do today, so he decided to go for a bit of a walk. He put on his shoes, walked into the forest, and continued walking for a good long while. A quarter of an hour later, he ran into another rabbit.
"Hey, hello there", he said, "What's your name? I'm Rabbit."
The other rabbit answered: "Oh, hello there. I'm Rabbit Rabbit. I didnt have much to do today, so I decided to go for a walk in the forest."
"Neat!" answered Rabbit. "I'm doing the same thing! How about we walk along together?"
Rabbit Rabbit thought for a second, then said "OK! let's go, Rabbit!".
So, they set off together, and walked along the forest trails. About 15 minutes later, they ran across another rabbit.
"Hey, hi! How are you doing?" said Rabbit. "We're Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit. We both had nothing much to do today, so we decided to go for a walk in the forest".
"Oh! How nice!", the other rabbit replied. "My name is Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. I had nothing better to do today, so I decided to go for a walk in the forest!"
"Well, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, how about you join us two, Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit, and go along with us on a walk through the forest?"
"Sure Rabbit!" said Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, "That's a great plan!"
So, Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit left together, and continued to walk along in the forest.
After walking together for a quarter of an hour, they happened upon another rabbit.
"Hello", said Rabbit, "Let me introduce myself and my friends here. I'm Rabbit, this is Rabbit Rabbit, and that's Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. What are you called?"
The other rabbit replied, "Why, my name is Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. Nice to meet you, Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit!"
"Why, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, what are you doing here?", Rabbit Rabbit asked. "Oh, I'm just walking along the forest today. I didn't have much else to do." "Gosh", came Rabbit's response, "so are we! What do you say, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, do you want to join us and walk along together?"
"Absolutely!" Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit cried out, and joined them. Together, Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit walked on through the forest.
They hadn't gone for much more than 15 minutes when, all of a sudden, they arrived at a clearing. On the other side, they saw a rabbit.
"Howdy!", Rabbit shouted, "How are you doing? We are Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, we're four rabbits who had nothing to do and so we decided to walk along in the foret together. Who are you?" The other rabbit came closer, looked at them, and answered: "What a coincidence! My name is Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. I didn't have much to do today, so I decided to go walking in the forest"
"You don't say!" Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit said. "How about joining us? We can all walk through the forest together!". "A good plan, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit! I think I'll join you!" Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit said, and he walked out of the clearing together with Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.
The five of them happily walked off together. To their surprise, a quarter-hour later, they saw a rabbit sitting along the side of the path. Rabbit went up to him, and asked "Hello there, unknown rabbit. My name is Rabbit, this rabbit here is Rabbit Rabbit. That one's Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, and the one on the end is Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. Over there's Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. What's your name?"
the other rabbit looked up, thought for a second, then answered "ah, nice to meet all of you! My name's Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.".
"Well met, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit! What are you doing in the forest?", came the question from Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.
"Ah, well now, I had nothing better to do today, so I decided a nice walk in the forest would be a good plan", Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit replied. "Walk with us!" came the immediate reply from Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, "I'm sure my buddies won't mind!".
"Alright, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, I'll join you!", exclaimed Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.
Happily and in good company, they all set off together: Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.
The group was walking along the path in the forest, when all of a sudden they found a rabbit sitting along the side of the road. Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit looked at each other, then at the other rabbit, and started talking at the same time: "Hello, rabbit! We are Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. What should we call you?" The other rabbit looked up and smiled: "hello there, Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. My name is Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit."
"Well met, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, what are you doing in this forest?", asked Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.
"Ah," Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit sighed, "I had nothing much to do today, so I decided to go for a walk in the forest.".
"What luck!" cried Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, "We're just walking along, too! let's all walk together!"
After a moment's thought, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit decided: "very well, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, I'll join you guys!"
So there went Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, along with Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit.
The group had been walking for roughly a quarter of an hour, when they came to a small stream.
"Nuts!" Rabbit exclaimed, "There's no bridge or shallow in sight! Whatever shall we do?"
"Well, Rabbit, I don't know", said Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, "Perhaps we can jump? but I'm not sure I can make it!"
"Ah, come on" replied Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, "I'm sure we'll be able to cross.". Having said that, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit walked back a bit, took a run-up, jumped......And landed about mid-stream,sank, and drowned.
Obviously, Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit were all distrought and saddened. "Poor Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, we barely knew him!" sobbed Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.
After a mourning period of a quarter of an hour, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit looked around and said: "Dear friends, I think that Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit was right. We'll need to cross". "No!" cried out Rabbit, "Don't do it!" but Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit was already taking a run-up - a bit longer than Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit had taken - ran, jumped, flew through the air...And landed just a bit further in the stream than Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, but still well short of the other side. Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit sank, and drowned.
"Noooo" wept Rabbit Rabbit, "Not Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit! What a shame!"
Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit gathered close together, and cried for a good 15 minutes.
"Fellows," said Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit at the end of it, "I now know what went wrong. I shall jump, and I shall cross, and I will help you all from the other side of the stream.".
Having said that, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit jogged back a few meters, ran towards the stream, jumped - he was crossing the air like an eagle... But in the end, he landed in the water, just a little bit further than Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. He struggled, he sunk, he drowned.
"Alas, poor Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit" came the cry from Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, "he was still in his prime!"
Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit all cried and hugged each other. After fifteen minutes, having dried their tears, they looked at each other. "My friends, I know what I must do," sighed Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit. "I'm better prepared, and I know now the dangers. Watch, as I will try, in memory of Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, to cross the stream in one big jump."
A long run-up, he soared and soared.... but no, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit landed in the stream, sank, and drowned.
Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit looked at each other, fell into each others' arms, and cried for a full 15 minutes.
"Rabbit," said Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, "Rabbit Rabbit, I feel we have now mourned long enough. With what we've been shown, I'm convinced that we can do what Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit failed to do. I will now jump, and I will succeed." After those words, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit backed away, stretched for a bit, said a quick prayer, ran up to the stream, and made a mighty leap. The wind blowing past his ears, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit still fell sadly short, just barely grzing the opposite bank, but ending up in the stream, sinking and drowning.
Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit hugged and cried, wailed, beat their chests, for an appropriate duration - a quarter of an hour or thereabouts - and turned to each other. "Rabbit," said Rabbit Rabbit, we've known each other the longest. You know how I feel, you know what I must do. For Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, I feel I must now make the jump. With God's will, I'll make it across." Rabbit looked at Rabbit Rabbit, hugged him, and wished him well.
Rabbit Rabbit took the longest run-up yet, flexed and stretched, focussed, ran, ran, ran and his jump was an impressive one to see - he flew across the stream, he could feel the other bank, he was nearly there....But alas, Rabbit Rabbit, though brushing the tips of a few blades of grass, still fell short, sank, and drowned.
Rabbit felt all alone, and he cried, and mourned, and sighed. After 15 minutes had passed, he stood up.
"Well," said Rabbit, "I know what I must do. There's nothing for it. Dear Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit - this is for all of you. If I survive, I will not forget you. If I should fall, we will all be reunited."
Having said that, he made his peace, stepped back, ran up to the stream, and jumped....and flew...and flew....he could see the stream passing by below him, he could see the waves, but he was still high and going strong...he kept on moving through the air like a thrown spear...and when he landed, just barely, on the other side of the stream, he sighed, a happy Rabbit again, and walked off.
Now, why, do I ask you, did Rabbit succeed, where Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit, Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit and Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit fail?
 

Dave

Staff member
You're not here to hunt, are you?
Guy goes bear hunting. He gets to a clearing and sees this bear so he aims and fires. He runs to the body but it's not there. Suddenly there's a tapping on his shoulder and he turns to see the bear...who proceeds to throw the guy down and fuck the shit out of him.

Bruised and bloody, the hunter crawls home and decides that he's going to get revenge on that bear. So he buys a bigger rifle & goes back. Same clearing. Same bear. He lines up his shot and *BLAM!*. He runs to the body but it's not there. Suddenly he feels a tapping on his shoulder. With tears in his eyes he turns to see the bear...who proceeds to throw him to the ground and fuck the shit out of him.

Torn, embarrassed and ashamed, the hunter crawls back home, but his rage knows no bounds. He buys a god damned elephant gun and vows that bear is going to die.

So the next day he goes to the clearing. There's the bear. He lines up his shot and *BLAM!!* He runs to the body but again, it's gone. His stomach falls as he feels the tap on his shoulder, but he doesn't turn. There's silence for a bit and then the bear says, "You're not here to hunt, are you?"

Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains.
 
*imitation of whale noises*
A Rabbi, a Priest and a Whale walk into a bar. The Rabbi says to the bartender: " I would like to order some kosher wine, so that I may reflect on the teachings of the Torah in quiet contemplation"

The Rabbi gets his wine and is in his way.

The Priest says to the bartender: " I would like some wine, which is representative of the blood of the Messiah and some bread which is representative of his body. I shall have these and quietly contemplate the teachings of the Bible"

The Priest goes on his way

The Whale goes up to the bar and says to the bartender:

 
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