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http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyl..._divorce_cases_cite_facebook_lawyers_say.html

Interesting stuff here. Basically saying that Facebook is one of the causes for divorces mainly cause people are having "illicit" chat online.

That got me thinking, my wife and I are pretty open when it comes to online stuff. We both flirt but at the end of the day still loves each other very much. She is not the jealous type when I flirt (sometimes unintentionally since I'm friendly) with people in person. She is comfortable with me and I with her (I see men flirt with her also)

She and I talk about it and only thing that she DOES object that if I sleep with other people without her knowing about it (or don't share the profit)

So.... what do y'all think is consider cheating? only if the other think it is cheating?

Tinwhistler said:

In my opinion, it all boils down to what the people in the relationship agree to.

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I agree with the Whistler.

If my girlfriend ever caught me flirting with other girls online, there would be hell to pay.

Which is why I only flirt with guys.

bhamv3;320383][quote=Tinwhistler said:

In my opinion, it all boils down to what the people in the relationship agree to.

Click to expand...

I agree with the Whistler.

If my girlfriend ever caught me flirting with other girls online, there would be hell to pay.

Which is why I only flirt with guys.[/QUOTE]

How YOU doin'?

Tinwhistler said:

In my opinion, it all boils down to what the people in the relationship agree to.

Click to expand...

I agree with this, too. There are a lot of things that I have no problem with my husband doing that other women would be totally pissed off about.

My personal relationship is pretty open and I've made mention of it on the forums before. That being said, there are rules that would constitute cheating in our relationship.

Mainly sexual acts without the other present. Otherwise I can't think of many ways we'd find reason to accuse the other of infidelity.

Tinwhistler said:

In my opinion, it all boils down to what the people in the relationship agree to.

Click to expand...

Exactly. Once trust is broken, you've cheated.

Here's the litmus test for cheating:

- If your partner found out what you've been doing, would they be angry?
- Do you feel like this is something you should only be doing with your partner?
- Does doing it make you feel guilty?

If you answer Yes to ANY of those, it's probably Cheating.

Simple flirting as cheating seems a bit drastic to me. But the article hints at more.

@Li3n said:

Simple flirting as cheating seems a bit drastic to me. But the article hints at more.

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Yea, but you know some people that I know (female AND male friends) get VERY jealous of their partner just looking at the opposite sex. I think that is a bit extreme, or even flirting = cheating but that is their relationship.

I had an acquaintance that her boyfriend "lusting" over a movie star and she got jealous of that. (BTW, he said Megan Fox was hot in Transformer and broke out into a fight about how he thinks his g/f is "not as hot" or "she could use more work to look hot" or whatever... it was scary moment. )

Crazy people... they're everywhere.


Meh, i get someone getting fearful by their partner flirting and asking them to stop, but calling it cheating s too much.

I can think of two of my acquaintances who think it's cheating if their husbands look at porn magazines. A lot of the wives of the guys who work with my husband think that going to a strip club is cheating (just by looking, not getting a lap dance or anything else). Personally, I think they're crazy. But it just goes to show that every relationship, and the boundaries people are comfortable with, are going to be different. It's not a one-size-fits-all kind of thing.

Tinwhistler said:

If my fiancee said "I know it's childish, but I just can't stand you flirting with other women" and I replied "alright babe..you know, I only want to flirt with you anyway." and then she caught me flirting with someone else, she'd have every right to feel betrayed.

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But not cheated on...

Like i said, i totally get not wanting your significant other to do something, but calling it all cheating kinda lessens the whole thing.

I can think of two of my acquaintances who think it's cheating if their husbands look at porn magazines.

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Poor them... over here they'd get cheated on every time their husbands pass a news-stand without looking at the ground.

Wildsoul said:

I can think of two of my acquaintances who think it's cheating if their husbands look at porn magazines. A lot of the wives of the guys who work with my husband think that going to a strip club is cheating (just by looking, not getting a lap dance or anything else). Personally, I think they're crazy. But it just goes to show that every relationship, and the boundaries people are comfortable with, are going to be different. It's not a one-size-fits-all kind of thing.

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That seems excessive to me too. It would be a different matter if I knew some random chick with a boom box, extensions, and velcro clothing was all over my boyfriend. That would bug me. Looking, though? I find it hard to believe those women never look at other men.

Agree with what Tin said, it's all about what expectations are set. That's why it's important to let someone know exactly what you want and not assume that they just know.

Wildsoul said:

I can think of two of my acquaintances who think it's cheating if their husbands look at porn magazines.

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:faint:

I just heard an interdimensional manifestation: A group of some possible future me in possible future dimensions in wich this happens to me just cried in terror.

The thing that cracks me up is both of them are military wives. They are fooling themselves if they honestly believe their husbands aren't looking at porn or simply having fantasies involving women other than their wives.

Lookin' at another man.


She can do whatever else she wants, so long as she's blindfolded.

for a woman should not cast her eyes upon another man, for it is shameful.

Don't say nuthin 'bout HJs under the table though.