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29 juin 2014

A date that will live in infamy.

If this is more like 3 than 2, I'm cool with it. I thought Michael Bay had said he was done with Transformers, though.

After the disappointment of 1, the WTF of 2 and boredom of 3, I think I'm done putting money on this franchise.

I am, though, wondering what kind of racial stereotype will be presented in the Autobots next. They've already done funky black guys, uneducated black people and working-class Brits. My guess is that the next in line is a math-enthusiast Autobot who transforms into a calculator and speaks like Short Round.

If you saw Transformers 3 in IMAX 3D and weren't just completely fucking blown away by the last 45 minutes / the entirety of the sequence in Chicago / climax of the movie, then I don't know what to tell you.

Charlie Don't Surf said:

If you saw Transformers 3 in IMAX 3D and weren't just completely fucking blown away by the last 45 minutes / the entirety of the sequence in Chicago / climax of the movie, then I don't know what to tell you.

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Amazing special effects a good movie does not make.

North_Ranger said:

Amazing special effects a good movie does not make.

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It wasn't just special effects. It was a long, coherent action scene with huge stakes and crazy setpieces and sequences.

Jay said:

29 juin 2014.

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Hahah, Frenchy.

And a new cast...so no more of the least likable character in the history of movies, Sam Wikity.

Charlie Don't Surf said:

It wasn't just special effects. It was a long, coherent action scene with huge stakes and crazy setpieces and sequences.

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So was the entirety of 2012 (Kevin Spacey film). Were you awed by it too?

Shegokigo said:

So was the entirety of 2012 (Kevin Spacey film). Were you awed by it too?

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Psst, John Cusack.

Way to explain the joke.

Shegokigo said:

Way to explain the joke.

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Adammon, ruining jokes since 6 minutes ago.

I liked 2012. That mad dash limo drive through the collapsing Los Angeles was fucking awe-inspiring.

I just accepted the movies as nothing more than giant robots beating the crap out of each other and enjoyed all three. Knowing I'll get flamed on this I enjoyed the first one the most. The highway chase scene was great. The second was my least favorite. I'll gladly drop my money on a fourth film.

And this scene in IMAX 3D was pretty spectacular:

Steve said:

I just accepted the movies as nothing more than giant blurs of metal that look nothing like robots beating the crap out of each other and enjoyed all three. Knowing I'll get flamed on this I enjoyed the first one the most. The highway chase scene was great. The second was my least favorite. I'll gladly drop my money on a fourth film.

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Fixed that for you.

North_Ranger said:

Amazing special effects a good movie does not make.

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cough...Star Wars.. Cough

Love the music in that scene.

And that scene is AWESOME YO.

Fuck the critics, fuck them right up the ass.

Mathias said:

cough...Star Wars.. Cough

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This is an example of shooting yourself in the foot.

BIG LOUD DUMB POPCORN MOVIE... I'll pay my $3 matinee ticket and come out thinking that it was almost worth the money.

I paid to see the first one. I learned my lesson. This one won't get my money, either.

ThatNickGuy said:

I paid to see the first one. I learned my lesson. This one won't get my money, either.

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This. So much this. Unless they have Simon Furman write it or something, I'm out.

I'll be watching this.

I expect to enjoy it, as I enjoyed the first three. Each had its flaws, but me and my goldfish-level attention span were quite satisfied with them.

I'll watch this in 3D... in AVX... and with D-BOXes if all possible. Or whatever the fuck is new and available in 2014.

Ain't no Dboxes in AVX. Dbox is for the plebes who don't mind noisy electro chairs in their screenings.

AVX is comfort.

Liked the first one, didn't like the second time I saw it. Didn't like the second one at all. I admit I still get a kick out of the third one. I just wish Sam would die and it would concentrate more on the robots, but I know that is asking a lot of "general audiences"

Was wondering how they could even make a forth one since Megatron is dead, but then I realized they already brought him back once, and this would be a good setup for Unicron to show up and make him Galvatron.

Just watched the third one fully for the first time tonight. I don't know how anyone can call it better than the first or second one.

I dug it more than the second one because I could what was happening most of the time. Something the second one was fucking guilty of. Also because the main non-job related plot was cribbed from two episodes of the original cartoon, which made me a little warm inside (funnily enough, the physics in the stupid children's cartoon were more thought out than the ones used in the movie for adults). It was still a shitty movie with neat special effects, but it was a less shitty movie than Transformers: Revenge of the Dark Fallen.

Frankie Williamson said:

Ain't no Dboxes in AVX. Dbox is for the plebes who don't mind noisy electro chairs in their screenings.

AVX is comfort.

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I love my local aVX theatre.

Fuck, I can reserve and book my seats online..

RESERVE MY SEATS

ONLINE

for free....

I have to suck no one's dick for that.

Jay said:

I have to suck no one's dick for that.

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But you do, anyway?

*runs away!*

The things I do for a bag of Starbursts.

Jay said:

I love my local aVX theatre.

Fuck, I can reserve and book my seats online..

RESERVE MY SEATS

ONLINE

for free....

I have to suck no one's dick for that.

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I too love AVX. I just wish that more often movies that aren't mediocre as shit like Safe House didn't occupy them.

I liked the first and third one - I didn't say they were good, I said I enjoyed them - and I'll probably go see the fourth.

Never got around to seeing the third one, should do that. I think the problem I had with the first two more than anything was how centered it gets on Sam and the humans as opposed to the Transformers themselves. I mean I guess you need some form of human element to keep it relatable to some degree, but really. It's not like the various cartoons were more than toy vehicles about robots kicking the shit out of each other, I don't need DEEP, I just need some well-shot robot violence.

I read somewhere that the first movie was human-centric rather than robot-centric due to budget limitations. They couldn't have too many shots of the robots.

For the second and third movies though, I don't think they can use the same excuse. I guess Michael Bay just likes going "AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!"

You'd think with his big hard-on for the American military, Bay would be more suited for, say, G.I. Joe.

Michael Bay has to keep sucking off the military and making them do heroic shit in each movie so he can keep playing with their toys.

Exactly. Which is why G.I. Joe would be a better fit.

I almost fell asleep multiple times during the last hour of Transformers 3. The was not a climax, that was a bunch of particle effects.

I'd heard that this was a re-imagining/re-launch of the franchise, rather than a sequel to the first three. Maybe it'll be better, maybe it'll be worse, either way I'm not spending a dime on it until I see some solid reviews from people whose movie judgment I trust, rather than rabid franchise fan-boys and/or people who think Michael Bay is Satan-incarnate (not saying anyone here fits the last two categories, I just have some... interesting... friends).

I'd like to see some simplification of the robot models mixed with typical Bayhem. Also less fast car-based transformers that no one will ever own please. Where's my Hound!?

giant blurs of metal that look nothing like robots

Shegokigo said:

Fixed that for you.

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I disagree with your argument but accept it as valid for you.
I never had this problem through any of the movi-bay-SPLOSION!!!

Raemon777 said:

I almost fell asleep multiple times during the last hour of Transformers 3. The was not a climax, that was a bunch of particle effects.

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The Ending to Transformers 3 was to Cinema as Dubstep is to Music.

I'm not sure if that's an insult or not, because I haven't given dubstep a fair shake yet.

My point is "All noise, no substance".

You seriously expected that from a "blockbuster" Michael Bay movie?

I had no criticism of the robot designs until Shortpacked recently mushed together a bunch of screenshots for a Valentine's Day joke.

Bunch of metal angles piled together. I don't know how you guys tell these things apart when you're watching these movies.

The autobots aren't quite as bad, but yea, absolutely all the decepticons look like a bunch of metal filings in a dryer.