[Movies] Pitch me your dumb movie idea

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Anonymous

Anonymous

Hi. I'm a crappy aspiring screenwriter in my off time that hasn't accomplished anything. I feel the urge to try and write something kind of dumb that isn't one of my ideas I'm more attached to. So give me some stupid ideas for a movie or story.

DISCLAIMER: Please don't pitch anything you're legitimately working on or think might be successful, since it's dumb to give away your ideas for free. If I somehow take something like this and it inspires me and somehow (this will never happen) becomes something successful or money-generating, I absolutely will not give you any credit. This is mostly just a dumb exercise, but you never know. I'm also posting this anonymously to make it even more detached from that weird gray area.

MODS - if you think this is kind of shady, then shut it down or out who I am, and apologies in advance.
 

Dave

Staff member
I've talked about this one before as a graphic novel or maybe writing it, but I know I'm never going to.

Starting scene: Priest in a confessional. He's weary and disillusioned after wearing the frock for so long. He hears someone enter the other side who asks the question, "Do clones have souls?" Before he can answer, the person bolts out the door and is gunned down just outside the church. The priest makes it out just in time to see the person - in my mind a young woman - being loaded into a black van.

Fast forward to a few years later, the same priest has been energized, obsessed with the mysterious person and the question. He's been unable to get anywhere with authorities to find out what's going on. He's again in the confessional, when a person enters. This time it's a young man who asks, "Do clones have souls?"

What's happening is that there's a super secret assassination/spy agency that uses clones as their agents. Turns out there's a single agent from whom they make all the clones. Through genetic manipulation they can make the clone any race, height, or sex. Each clone knows everything the other clones knew and Agent Prime is wired in to see/hear/feel everything the agents see/hear/feel. But having to watch yourself die several hundreds of times and keep track of all the incoming data from all the live agents causes Agent Prime to become totally insane, which shows in the clones trying to break free and gain free will.

That's the basis of the story and it can go several places. Have at it.
 
Theodore Roosevelt, Nikola Tesla and John L. Sullivan are brought together in the modern day to take on a revived and mystically-enhanced Grigori Rasputin.
 
A new strain of the flu, say H3N2 (which can, incidentally, infect swine, birds, and humans) turns out to be "the big one" that sweeps the world like the plague. It doesn't show many symptoms until well after it's communicable, and hits an individual so quickly afterwards that even with good medical care there's a good chance of death.

While scientists are busy building a vaccine for it, epidemiologists note that those infected with HIV are almost 100% immune to the effects of this new flu, though the mechanism is unknown. Africa and other parts of the world with an HIV infection rate of 20% or more are impacted, but not nearly as heavily as more developed parts of the world. It turns out to be an illness of the wealthy.

The movie follows the lives of several people, connected by fate, as they face the this plague. One who is involved in the research and must make hard decisions on what to recommend, particularly in terms of quarantine since there's no easy way to contain a virus that shows few symptoms early. A family who see people around them getting sick, and choosing, or not, to trade chance of death due to flu for lifetime infection with HIV (a choice made more difficult as they must decide for their children who are more likely to die from the flu). A politician trying to unseat the backwards incumbent that is bent on old out of date policy doomed to kill most of his constituents in order to reap the benefits of his investments in advanced medical care. A man who's wife was pregnant when she was infected, is now brain dead due to fever because she refused drugs that would have put the baby in danger, but is breathing on her own, responding well to the feeding tube, and the baby is probably safe due to the placental barrier, but the delivery is risky, HIV infection is risky, and the status of the baby's possible infection is unknown because any test that would prove it breaks the barrier, etc. In the initial fog of war it's unclear how clean things must be in order to prevent infection, and people are reluctant to visit the hospital, urgent care centers, or doctors as they believe they will get it while there. Lots of people fleeing urban centers, only to find that they are infecting suburbia. Doomsday preppers take to the hills or their bunkers.

Lots of stories to tell. Overall the flu becomes yet another flu the human immune system can manage for those that survived, though a staggering portion of the population chose HIV, which, ironically, leads to more profit motive and eventually an actual cure, not just management, for HIV due to the rate of infection. Scientists also discover the mechanism that HIV used which caused the virus to fail, and have created a medicine that duplicates that functionality, thus curing most variants of influenza in the human race altogether, for those in developed countries anyway. While it takes time, HIV and influenza are both expected to to be put on the shelf of history alongside polio, diphtheria, whooping couch, and others.

While billions died, the human race has eradicated two diseases, and are overall better off than they were prior to the infection. A basic, "whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" theme.

You could replace HIV with HPV, or a communicable form of cancer, or something else, and the main theme would stay intact, though HIV is unique in many ways that makes it a particularly interesting target.

Could be an action thriller, which the movie studios like, but it would probably be more interesting as a thoughtful drama, though not as profitable.
 
Nice try syfy channel. You'll have to pry SharkQuakeDinopocolypse: Also Robots, out of my cold dead hands before I give it up for free.
 
I have a weird thing I thought of that's slightly inspired by Lost's button in the bunker that I never really fleshed out. It also might be a TV show? But it's some "normal guy" who somehow inherits a curse or something where he has to kill someone every ~week to either like. Keep the world from ending or keep some horrible old god (think Cabin in the Woods) at bay. So he has to figure out how to do it without being a total asshole and without becoming a total psychopath.
 
I have a weird thing I thought of that's slightly inspired by Lost's button in the bunker that I never really fleshed out. It also might be a TV show? But it's some "normal guy" who somehow inherits a curse or something where he has to kill someone every ~week to either like. Keep the world from ending or keep some horrible old god (think Cabin in the Woods) at bay. So he has to figure out how to do it without being a total asshole and without becoming a total psychopath.
Maybe he finds a way to pick people at random without ever knowing who they are, until one day he kills someone he loves!
 
A down-on-his-luck screenwriter turns to the internet for wild inspiration. The mess he fabricates becomes a smash-hit, making him millions and starting his successful career ... until those internet weirdos came to take what was theirs.
 
Guy eats a demonically possessed ice pop, and gets ice flame powers(flames that freeze). Writes itself. Title: FREEZER BURN!
 
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I think a proper movie adaptation of the Dragonriders of Pern would be nice.
Film and television rights for the Pern IP has a storied history, but the latest suggests that there is still movement and desire to create movies on it. McCaffrey died shortly after they signed a screenwriter and producer, and that was three years ago with no new news though, so it's probably in writing limbo right now.

  • In May 2006, it was announced that rights to the entire Dragonriders of Pern series were optioned by Oscar-winning production company Copperheart Entertainment.[8] Copperheart announced their intention to bring Pern to the big screen.
  • On 12 April 2011, Copperheart announced signing David Hayter as screenwriter and Don Murphy as executive producer for a film version of Dragonflight, with production expected to begin in 2012.[9][10]
In other words, they need an awesome screenwriter, so here's your chance to shine, Anonymous aspiring screenwriter!
 
Whine and dine: Story about an aspiring food critic who hates everything he eats- UNTIL HE FINDS LOVE! Throw in some pop songs to scenes of two random people doing something that would not be fun in real life but they treat as fun and BAM- movie.
 
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