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This thread on Reddit is quite possibly the most epic thread I have ever seen. Both the post and the comments are absolutely hysterical, and so I present it to you folks. The concept is simple, text a girl, any girl, in your phone asking "when can I tap that" and continue from there. Surprisingly, its working for some people. I would try this, but I fear the reprecussions at this point would be far too terrible.

Calleja, get to work!

Original thread: http://www.pbnation.com/showthread.php?t=3150636

Reddit comments: http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/ ... _tap_that/

Awesome. I wish I knew an accurate translation for this expression in spanish. i wouldn't use it, but at least I could explain this joke to some of my non-english speaking friends...

Lawl, these threads are being a great read.

Silver Jelly said:

Awesome. I wish I knew an accurate translation for this expression in spanish. i wouldn't use it, but at least I could explain this joke to some of my non-english speaking friends...

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The closest expressions I've heard went along the lines of "cuando podré catarte?" and similar, I think there was a closer one but I just can't recall.

Oh, man. I'm tempted to try this, but...wow, I think I'd just get slapped. :slap:

There are so many people I could text this to, that would take it out of context, and result in me being unharmed.

ok, pansies.

me: Hey girl, whassup?
her: Nothing. You
me: When you gonna let me tap that?
her: Greg! You have a woman
me: That doesn't answer the question.
her: never

you should note that I'm like 20 years older than this girl and friends with her mom. lol I'm sure she was going "ewww! gag!". I'd have gotten way weirded out if she had gone for it.

Tinwhistler said:

ok, pansies.

me: Hey girl, whassup?
her: Nothing. You
me: When you gonna let me tap that?
her: Greg! You have a woman
me: That doesn't answer the question.
her: never

(you should note that I'm like 20 years older than this girl and friends with her mom. lol I'm sure she was going "ewww! gag!")

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And if she said, "Yes uncle Tin..." ?

see above...i'd feel very squicky inside. She's legal, but you know, I've known her since she was a kid. I don't look at her in that way. Plus, as she says, I have a woman

She's all cracking up now, cause I let her in on the joke

These threads pop up on 4chan alot, comedy gold.

Me: Yo, when can I tap that?
Him: faggot

Okay, I was bored at work since no one is in IRC, and there is no new content on the web. And I got permission. And it was weird.

So I texted Alex, someone I had some interest in back in high school, and to pat myself on the back please note that she also has a boyfriend.

Me: Hey you long time no see!
Her: Oh hey, what u been up to?
Me: Not much so when you gonna let me tap that?
Her: Did u and Em breakup?!?!
Me: Nope answer the question, Im busy
Her: But what about Em?!
Me: Meh, your answer?

She hasn't text back, its been 10 minutes. Heh

When I first saw this thread title, I thought it was going to be about a website keeping track of when young starlets reach legal age. I was pleasantly surprised to be wrong.

for Sing and Tin,

If y'all didn't have a woman already..... sounds like they would actually consider it.

figmentPez said:

When I first saw this thread title, I thought it was going to be about a website keeping track of when young starlets reach legal age. I was pleasantly surprised to be wrong.

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Why would you care about when they reach legal age?

Chibibar said:

for Sing and Tin,

If y'all didn't have a woman already..... sounds like they would actually consider it.

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That is precisely what I was thinking. Talk about a confidence boost.

Anyway, I texted her the explanation before she could agree to anything, I felt too awful.

Me: when can I tap that?
Her: Que diantres significa eso?

Denbrought said:

figmentPez said:

When I first saw this thread title, I thought it was going to be about a website keeping track of when young starlets reach legal age. I was pleasantly surprised to be wrong.

Click to expand...

Why would you care about when they reach legal age?

Click to expand...

Could always go by my philosphy: If there's grass on the field....

Singularity.EXE said:

Chibibar said:

for Sing and Tin,

If y'all didn't have a woman already..... sounds like they would actually consider it.

Click to expand...

That is precisely what I was thinking. Talk about a confidence boost.

Anyway, I texted her the explanation before she could agree to anything, I felt too awful.

Click to expand...

Yeah, I had to let my friend's daughter in on the joke, for a few reasons. I wouldn't want to give her the idea that I'm the kind of guy who cheats behind my fiance's back, plus I wouldn't want her to think I'm the dirty old man who's been having nasty thoughts about her while she was growing up. Both of those things just make me feel wrong, and could totally ruin her image of me if I didn't let her in on the joke.

All my friends know that my humor is down in the gutter, though, so once I let her in on the joke, she realized the point was to make her go "ewww!" and thought it was hilarious.

For the record, I don't think she considered it for a second. Women are better at providing subtle hints than men. Instead of saying "no", many times a woman will provide a reason why "yes" is a bad idea: "You have a girlfriend" "I'm all wrong for you" "I'm having a bad outbreak of genital herpes right now." you know, that kind of thing.
:slywink:

So, I think she went "uhm, WTF? EWWW!" and then let me down as politely as she could.

Shegokigo said:

Denbrought said:

figmentPez said:

When I first saw this thread title, I thought it was going to be about a website keeping track of when young starlets reach legal age. I was pleasantly surprised to be wrong.

Click to expand...

Why would you care about when they reach legal age?

Click to expand...

Could always go by my philosphy: If there's grass on the field....

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or you could go by my philosphy: If there's grass on the field play ball. If not, play in the mud.

Shegokigo said:

Denbrought said:

figmentPez said:

When I first saw this thread title, I thought it was going to be about a website keeping track of when young starlets reach legal age. I was pleasantly surprised to be wrong.

Click to expand...

Why would you care about when they reach legal age?

Click to expand...

Could always go by my philosphy: If there's grass on the field....

Click to expand...

And if there ain't, you can always play in the mud.

I beat dren by two minutes

Denbrought said:

And if there ain't, you can always play in the mud.

Click to expand...

CrimsonSoul said:

or you could go by my philosphy: If there's grass on the field play ball. If not, play in the mud.

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Um.

No

and

No.

:humph:

Come on, Shego, you would get some of that Tayler Swift if she offered?

CrimsonSoul said:

I beat dren by two minutes

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Curses!

... you misspelling den for dren made me think that if I was to ever be put inside a Dreadnought, it would make for some interesting names. Dreadbrought?

Denbrought said:

CrimsonSoul said:

I beat dren by two minutes

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Curses!

... you misspelling den for dren made me think that if I was to ever be put inside a Dreadnought, it would make for some interesting names. Dreadbrought?

Click to expand...

I'm ninja-y like that in my typos!

CrimsonSoul said:

Come on, Shego, you would get some of that Tayler Swift if she offered?

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Sheki no tossy that type of salad.

Shegokigo said:

Denbrought said:

figmentPez said:

When I first saw this thread title, I thought it was going to be about a website keeping track of when young starlets reach legal age. I was pleasantly surprised to be wrong.

Click to expand...

Why would you care about when they reach legal age?

Click to expand...

Could always go by my philosphy: If there's grass on the field....

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I would've thought you'd like it bare.

But there is a difference between the grass getting trimmed, and having the grass still in the seeds.

Jake said:

Shegokigo said:

Denbrought said:

figmentPez said:

When I first saw this thread title, I thought it was going to be about a website keeping track of when young starlets reach legal age. I was pleasantly surprised to be wrong.

Click to expand...

Why would you care about when they reach legal age?

Click to expand...

Could always go by my philosphy: If there's grass on the field....

Click to expand...

I would've thought you'd like it bare.

Click to expand...

Well yeah, but that doesn't really apply to the quote, though a good trim is nice too.

I might try this.

well, damn. All the other women on my phone are either a relative, a co-worker or someone I've already slept with.

I've run out of people to send this to

Then again, I suppose I could send it to my fiancee's mom....

Me: When you gonna let me tap that?

Her: You didn't already start smoking that weed we got for the weekend, did you?

Me: No, I bought a new toy.

Her: Is it the double ended one?

Me: Holy shit, this is going on Reddit

Her: WTF? Don't you dare!

Edit: This is not a personal "Tap that" story, just my favorite from the Reddit buch.

Me: Hey
Her: Hey, what's up?
Me: Not much, so when you gonna let me tap that?


Waiting on response... it's been like 2 minutes... come on respond lol.

Hmm what would be a good time frame to wait before explaining the joke to her? 30 mins?

HoboNinja said:

Me: Hey
Her: Hey, what's up?
Me: Not much, so when you gonna let me tap that?


Waiting on response... it's been like 2 minutes... come on respond lol.

Hmm what would be a good time frame to wait before explaining the joke to her? 30 mins?

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You should probably tell your sister pretty quick.

:explode: :finger:

me: Hey girl
her: yes sir
me: when can I tap that?
her: I get off at 7. Want to meet up?
me: Lol thatd mean I have to get dressed
her: Hmmmm. well, I can tell my fiance that i'm workin late and come by there. Sound good?
me: Epic win!
her: I love you! )

hehehe, my fiancee's a riot

Sent the link to a female friend of mine back in Fredericton.

Got a text earlier:

Her: So, when can I tap that?
Me: When you move to Toronto.

...score?

I texted it to my buddy who is also on the boards here:

Me: Hey, when can I tap that?
Him: On your next turn. Geez, it's like you've never played Magic before!

He was prepared I think.

reddit said:

nah girl. I wanna tap that * so hard whoever pulls me out will become the king of england.

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-Adam

RoboKomodo said:

I texted it to my buddy who is also on the boards here:

Me: Hey, when can I tap that?
Him: On your next turn. Geez, it's like you've never played Magic before!

He was prepared I think.

Click to expand...

My husband texted his best friend with this and got a similar response:

Him: We playing Magic or WOW TCG?

He was serious. He came over with his card duffle bag.