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First, nothing is happening to this place. It's snug as a bug in rug. I have it covered for at LEAST the next six months and by then things should be more stable.

I have stated already in the rant thread that I'm losing my house. Common knowledge. BUT...here's how my last week has gone:

Thursday, December 22: Met with a lawyer and found out that we could save our house, even though it would still be outside our price range. If we cut out some things we could (barely) afford it. This is what we chose.
Friday, December 23: Neighbors call on my car. It gets towed. So much for being able to pay for the lawyer fee for keeping the house.
Saturday, December 24: Not a bad day, all things considered. Something was happening but we didn't know it. Because...
Sunday, December 25: Day starts with a phone call from my sister. My father had fallen and broken his hip - the previous evening at 8 pm!! Seems neither he nor my mother wanted to other anyone. Think about that. For 12 hours he lay on the floor with a broken hip. Mom gave him some Tylenol. I spent the rest of the day in the hospital.
Monday, December 26: Spent the day at the hospital but found out that they couldn't do anything for my father because the break was right above the pin they put in his hip when they replaced it a number of years ago. So he'd be going to a Skilled Nursing facility for rehab.

Here's where it all gets interesting. My sister has power of attorney. What we'd discussed and planned was for me and my wife to move in with my parents to help them out. I'd already made it quite plain that after I would like to have the house. My brother and sister could split everything else - including all the life insurance policies. They'd get a lot more than I but I don't care.

I found out yesterday that my sister won't give me the house because of what happened with mine. Disregard the fact that I wouldn't have a house payment and money would no longer be an issue. She states that as I'm not handy with a hammer that she wants the house to go to someone who could take care of it. Don't know who that would be but I'm thinking one of her kids will get it.

So fuck her. The wife and I are looking for an apartment here in Omaha. I know that will end up being a burden to my parents as they won't have anyone around to look after them, but I won't move my family only to get kicked out after a couple months or even a couple years. She wants to figure out how to take care of them? Fine. Have fun. So I feel like an asshole for doing that to my parents, but there you have it.

Couple of issue with that, though. Losing our house means that our credit is shit. We're having issues finding an apartment that will take us. Add in the fact that our HHR is in my dad's name and this means we'll be losing it soon. If we can't find a place to stay we'll be homeless in about 2 weeks.

Couple of things. First, I am NOT accepting money or anything else. Money isn't the problem, really. I still have a good job, just that with everything that has gone on (including my paychecks being garnished due to student loans!) our credit is making it hard. Second, I'm only making this post because very soon I might disappear and I wanted you to know why. Oh, I'll still be on during my work times when I can, but any issues probably won't be able to be handled right away. You'll have to be patient with me. Of course, if we find a place this will all be moot. I sure hope it's all fucking moot!

So there you have it. The saga of Dave. I do have to apologize to Dirona, though. She won the book contest and I haven't sent it to my friend yet to get signed.

Maybe I'll go sell a kidney or something....

My dad did the exact same thing with his broken hip and just thought it was bruised for a long time before giving in and going to the doctor.

But that aside, godspeed / good luck and whatnot getting everything sorted out.

Geeze man. When it rains huh?

Well, Dave, you need anything we can provide here let us know. The credit/Apartment thing can be a pain but if you guys are persistent I'm sure you will find something. Either way, prayers and thoughts for you and your family from our part of the north.

Fuck me. Dave, if there is anything we can do, you'd better damn well tell us! You've done ridiculous amounts for us/this place, we'd jump at the chance to reciprocate that.

Other than that, take care and best wishes, noble administrator!

I have a few kidney's I'd gladly donate for you to sell, you know that Dave

On a side note, I can't imagine what it's like to lose a home, then have a second one pulled out from under you, but if it's any consolation, your sister is going to fall flat on her face trying to care for your parents and hopefully you'll be the first one she calls to bail her out. Are you planning on making the apartment thing a temporary situation till you can get fully back on your good credit and try and hop back into a home or now that your kids are grown and ready to leave are you planning on a smaller permanent situation?

If I can get into the family home I'll do that. Otherwise it'll be apartment living for a long time.

what type of bankruptcy were you proposing? 13?

makare said:

what type of bankruptcy were you proposing? 13?

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Yes. I believe that's the one.

If people are willing to help you, on here or otherwise, like with the payment for the bankruptcy fees you should accept it. You've put a lot of time and your own resources into this place and accepting help from people is only fair on both sides.

In our bankruptcy class the professor said never take a client who cannot afford the payment because if he has put himself in such a position that no one is willing to help him then you probably want nothing to do with him. Don't be the person who is just too proud to accept the help available to you.

I know it isn't my business but that is how I see it.

I agree about the pride, and it's not charity. You've done a lot for us at your expense if there is anything we can do, tell us and we will help.

Dave said:

Thursday, December 22: Met with a lawyer and found out that we could save our house, even though it would still be outside our price range. If we cut out some things we could (barely) afford it. This is what we chose.
Friday, December 23: Neighbors call on my car. It gets towed. So much for being able to pay for the lawyer fee for keeping the house.

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So, hypothetically, is this option still on the table?

Good luck mang, I wish there was something I could do for you.

Dave, I know it's tough to accept help, but if you need anything financially, just throw up a donation link, and I'll click it so hard it breaks. Or, you know, toss in a few bucks. Either or.

I was in a tough financial time not long ago, and it took the help of some close friends to get me out of it. Now that I'm in a place where I'm not losing sleep over bills, I'd be more than happy to help out.

evilmike said:

So, hypothetically, is this option still on the table?

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This. As you've pointed out, you will have trouble getting a new place due to credit issues, so anything you can do to keep your current place is probably your best bet.

I know you've said that you don't want money, and that money isn't the issue - but it is. You are cash strapped for the moment, and a little cash infusion would probably open up some options you've already discounted.

Dave, Don't even think about editing this post. We're not doing this to support the board. We don't want anything back. We just want to support you. Use the money in whatever way you see fit.


Anyone who wants to help:
Paypal here--> david@nihsen.com <-- Paypal here


For those who don't want to mess with paypal, or don't have a paypal account, PM me and I'll accept credit cards and pass gift donations on.

I figure $1,000 ought to help out, so I've put $100 toward that goal. It won't solve much, but it might grease the wheels for you a little bit.

If I wasn't near broke, myself, I would absolutely do something to lend Dave a hand, financially. Seriously, man, even though you're not wanting financial help, we want to help. Hell, just look at all we did for North Ranger. You don't think we're willing to help, if we can?

That said, I have a feeling next year will be a good year for you and your family.

Quit sending me money, you dorks!

Update: Dad had a colonoscopy. They found a large cancerous mass in his rectum...and they punctured his colon during the colonoscopy. He's in surgery now and it's all up in the air.

The house is basically gone. Even if we could keep it we'd be walking away. It's got so many issues that we can't afford to fix.

Again, money isn't the issue. I love you guys for thinking about me but it's not necessary.

(But I can't edit anything from my iPod.)

Dave said:

Quit sending me money, you dorks!

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But we want to help.

I know. Right now I'm more worried about my poor dad.

Yes, I do hope your dad turns out alright.

Either way, I'm sending you money. Medical bills cost too ya know.

That's two pantsless men I've sent money to this month.

No offense to you Dave, but your brother and sister are assholes with no concept of what "family" is supposed to mean.

Good luck, man. I hope shit works out for you.

Gotta say I had the same thought as Mathias. I'm so sorry you are in this position, but know that we're all pulling for you!

Dad's out of surgery. He's stable but they removed a great deal of his colon so for the rest of his life he'll be pooping into a bag, which is gross. But he's out and headed into intensive care. He'll be sedated for the next 24-48 hours.

God damn I hate hospitals.

A friend of mine has one of those bags. It's not as bad as I thought it would be. I'm sure it will be more of a challenge since he is older, but still. Hope he is feeling better!

Dave said:

Friday, December 23: Neighbors call on my car. It gets towed.

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This is what caught my attention. What kind of jackass neighbors call to have your car towed the Friday before Christmas? Without searching too deep, I can only assume it's non-operational & an "eyesore"? If it was the family mode of transportation & got towed because you parked a foot over the yellow line then fuck them. Even if it wasn't, I can only hope the next occupants of the house set up a meth lab & have a steady stream of junkies stopping by at all hours of the day.

Seriously, Dave, what you are experiencing is one of my greatest fears. Granted, I don't have a wife & kids to worry about as well, but looking down the barrel of not knowing where or if you'll have a roof over your heads is something that gives me panic attacks. About 7 years ago I spent 9 months collecting unemployment. I used to talk about how great it would be to not have to go to work & I could just sit back & collect unemployment. Funny thing is, not having to go to work would be a lot more fun if you had unlimited funds. Otherwise it's not very appealing.

Long story short, I've just recently gotten things back under control. But I'm at a fairly solid job paying $16/hr, which allows me a little discretionary income. If anything were to happen to my job, I'm in a situation where I wouldn't be able to just take any job. I'd have to search hard for something that paid $10+/hr and those are few & far between.

Anyways, I feel for you Dave. Sounds like it's somewhat under control, just some hardship ahead for a little while. Your sister is being a PITA. I know its hard to think about, & I know it might be difficult with her having POA, but it might be good to make sure your parents affairs are in order. If you're now not going to the house in the verbal deal that clearly benefitted your sister, then make sure things will get taken care of down the road.

Dave, I'm one of those forumites with neither the wisdom nor the financial muscle to really contribute in a substantial way, but I'm sending lots of good vibes your way. Maybe all our good vibes can combine to form something great. Like noetics, I dunno.

Good luck, man. You're one of the few people I know who I can say really deserves some good luck.

Sorry to hear that, hoss. Hope things get better.

Stress kills. I know from first hand experience. I don't want you posting from a CICU bed like I was a few years ago. I'm chipping in anyway.

Update: First, the car was operational, to answer redthirtyone. It's just that the plates had expired. I had just gotten with my December paycheck the insurance I needed for it and with my January 3rd paycheck I was going to license it. Seems that I should have done November/December instead!

Okay, my dad is out of surgery as I think I've stated. He's in critical but stable condition. If I don't get a phone call in the middle of the night tonight I think we'll be in the clear.

Just had a family pow-wow and the kids are right there with us helping make the decisions as to where we're going and such. We may be living in a crappy apartment, but damn it our family will be together!

So my point stands. They called the cops & had your mode of transportation towed for expired tags the Friday before Christmas weekend.

Fuck 'em. Fuck 'em right in the ovaries.

Indeed. Grinchy thing to do.

redthirtyone said:

So my point stands. They called the cops & had your mode of transportation towed for expired tags the Friday before Christmas weekend.

Fuck 'em. Fuck 'em right in the ovaries.

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A-yup.
Added at: 00:11
I have to say, though, that it's not HIM (male neighbor) that does it, but his bitchy wife nobody likes. One time they were cleaning off their driveway or something and it was getting all over the street. My other neighbor (gruff old guy that scares people but has a heart of gold when you get to know him) grabbed HER yard hose and started spraying down the street. She came out of the house in a huff that he was using her hose and so he sprayed the shit out of her. Funniest shit ever!

We hates her, precious! Hates!

HAH! That's funny! My parents have an annoying, busybody neighbor like that. There's a yard man/handy man who pretty much handles everyone's house on that street, and we always catch her watching him and looking at his trailer suspiciously like it's full of drugs. She's not as mean as that other woman, though.

@Dave: So what you're saying is that if you hadn't been too proud to accept a few donations you could have purchased the inspection sticker that would have prevented your car being taken?

No, I'm saying if they weren't dicks and had waited 10 days it would have been fine.

Nice response but you know well what I meant.

I don't blame you for not wanting to take assistance, it would make you feel a little "less" like a "success" but I dunno Dave, sometimes it's just best to bow your head an inch so that you can walk a mile instead of holding your head up high and walking an inch...

Which is why I wish them great discomfort with whomever moves into your place. From my experience, the more you dislike someone & try to make them move, the next tenant is usually twice as bad & makes you WISH for the old days. Seriously. A frickin meth lab, gang hideout or whorehouse would be the best scenario here.

A ganghideout where they make meth and keep their whores.

Really? Who the fuck calls someone in for expired plates? Is that really anyone else's business? Really?

Mathias said:

Really? Who the fuck calls someone in for expired plates? Is that really anyone else's business? Really?

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It happened to me just a week ago in my apartment complex. I'm pretty sure it was someone that's pissy I keep getting the good parking space.

I can't believe that a cop would respond to one of those complaints. Or respond past writing a ticket.

A cop wouldn't, bylaw would.

Nobody likes bylaw officers.

That makes me wonder why they don't tow your vehicle when you are stopped for an expired registration...?

It's not illegal to have a parked car with expired registration, I don't think. But private parking lots can have cars that aren't street legal towed. This probably varies by state/city/whatever. Dave's car was likely parked in some... common area? homeowner's association lot or something. Maybe on the street. I don't imagine anywhere can tow a car out of your driveway

It was on the street. I also have a ticket to go along with it.

Mathias said:

Really? Who the fuck calls someone in for expired plates? Is that really anyone else's business? Really?

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You ever see the movie El Norte, Mathias?

Seriously, Dave. Probably the only thing separating my situation from yours is that my father is still healthy and our house is (luckily) less expensive. As a result you need not fear some ridiculous donation from us (not that we don't want to, we just...can't). I feel like all I have to give is advice, but it sounds like it's already too late for that to make much of a difference, either.

Please make sure your parents know the motivations behind your actions. Don't let there be any doubt. If you DO end up moving in with your folks (and that doesn't sound bad), make sure an agreement (service/renters'?) is drawn up ahead of time so that Sis can't kick you out, even if she wanted to. I'm sure this is not the first time this sort of thing has happened, someone must know what can be done.

Also, if things are as bad a you say, that means there should be a hella refund coming.

Dammit, Dave. Don't choose Pride over Family. Either family. My folks gave me an extra $20 tip on top of the $80 I billed them to replace their $75 PSU, and I knew better'n to refuse. Take it, put it where it'll do the most good, and if you're still gonna fall, at least it won't hurt as badly.

--Patrick

Stay strong, man. Know that you have all the emotional support here you could ever want, for the little bit it's worth.

Also, second everyone else on the pride thing. I think we all understand how you feel, but after all the effort and money you've put into this place, you're free to think of it more as us re-balancing the scales a bit.

Okay, I'm at work today (finally) and can more easily answer questions. I've been logged in either with my iPod or from a computer in the hospital waiting room, which is a terrible, terrible machine. Plus I've had about 2 hours of sleep a night. Last night I drugged myself and went to bed at 9 pm so I'm actually refreshed and wide awake today for the first time in ages.

The reason I didn't want to take money to save the house is because it would only help for a month.

It's like eating at a restaurant where you can't afford the food, so they give you a tab. But eventually they say, "Um. You need to pay that tab." Which you can't do. So they say, "Okay, we'll let you get by without paying the tab." But you still can't afford to eat there.

What I WILL do is take the money given and use it for moving expenses. We have to get a truck, boxes, deposit, etc. I really do appreciate all the well-wishers, but the money is not necessary. My mom thinks you're all pretty great, though.

First my mom, now Dave's mom... okay, who's the next forumite whose maternal unit we can convert?

Y'all could work on my wife... *wry smile*

Damn, Dave... It sounds like you're weathering the storm as best as you can.

You have a dedicated group of people here who, through some combination of personality and action ('cause it damned fer sure ain't your looks! *rimshot*) you have convinced that you are a "good person." Let it happen - you're not asking for a handout, you're letting your friends give you a boost when you and your family need it.

Lecture over - others here have put it far more eloquently than I can right now. I hope your new digs aren't too bad for you.


And I feel your pain on the car thing - city marshals here towed my 79 Nova out of my driveway on Christmas Eve 2007, for about the same reason, except mine was non-functioning. I have no idea which one of my douche-nozzle neighbors called in on it - the turnover's been so high, I couldn't tell you if they're even still here. They better hope and pray that they aren't.

But without the house payment & stuff the amount of money I have over the short term doesn't matter. I am more in need of a longer term solution. Finding a place is what I need more than anything. The rest will fall into place.

I meant with regards to moving expenses... I agree that accepting a hand-up is not a viable option for any extended period of time.

Wait... you have expire dates on your plates? Why?

Whhhy?

So the state can get more money every year.

Jay said:

Wait... you have expire dates on your plates? Why?

Whhhy?

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It is how our states and counties pay for road and bridge upkeep.

You didn't understand.

We pay for our plates every year, we just don't put them visibly on our cars so dipshits won't do what they did to Dave.

Not all states work that way... some require you to have a registration decal on your license plate. Others (New York, Texas and New Jersey come to mind) require you to have a registration sticker on your windshield.

Jay said:

You didn't understand.

We pay for our plates every year, we just don't put them visibly on our cars so dipshits won't do what they did to Dave.

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Your insurance stickers function in much the same way - and part of the proceeds for that go to the gov't. I don't believe you'll get towed for expired insurance though, unless you're driving around.

Here, if a vehicle is on a city street (whether driving or parked) and has no insurance, we tow them.

Here, you get a ticket for not having insurance, and then you have to go get insurance.

Funny thing about our State law...if you have proof of insurance but you don't present it before the officer goes back to his car to run your ID, you get a ticket. Even if you present it after the officer returns and he verifies that it is current, you still get that ticket.

--Patrick

Here, your car is left well alone.

There is no stupid fuckin sticker imposed on your car with dates anywhere that encourages retards as well as griefers calling on their neighbors or cops having to meet his imposed quotas of "whatever the fuck the capt with the smallest dick" decided he wanted done to impress the bigger dipshit with monthly numbers.

Cops do their thing and verify cars on the road as they patrol by entering their license into their databanks and pulling them over when needed.

Tough break Dave but that America for ya. Home of the Brave. Home of the Free.

Heh
Added at: 17:33

We don't put anything on our car that shows we have insurance. We do have to register our vehicles but the plates are only changed every ten years. The other day I got pulled over and didn't have proof of insurance I just had to fax it to the station within 14 days and it was no big deal. I don't have a problem with the registration fee because like someone else said it is how they help pay for upkeep on the road.

If people are out to be assholes having your car towed is probably just one way of doing that. If that wasn't possible I am sure they'd find something else. It isn't the law that is the problem it is that some people get off on making other people miserable.

Just wish to reiterate what others have said - you have our support, never hesitate to say the word if there's anything we can do.

Personally I think your neighbors deserve a human shit on their doorstep.

Sounds like they already have a shit human on the other side.

--Patrick

doomdragon6 said:

Personally I think your neighbors deserve a human shit on their doorstep.

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I'm way ahead of you. *flipping through his Rollodex for Shego's number*

Please. As if Shego would stoop to "Flaming bag of Poo."

"Flaming bag of Napalm," on the other hand...