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Soooo Dave and/or Jay,

I asked a girl from work out on a movie date, and she said yes, but then asked if she could bring a friend (a girl), for "safety" and also because she is worried about her friend. I thought that was a little weird, but since it's just a movie (not like we were going to dinner) I shrugged and said, "sure".

Now, had it been me asking about bringing a friend, that would have been a pretty clear indicator that I wanted to keep things entirely in the friend-zone. However, I've long since learned that my reasoning for things doesn't always match what a lot of folks (especially women) are thinking, so I'm throwing this out there:

What could this mean?

that means you have no chance, is what that means :/

ElJuski said:

that means you have no chance, is what that means :/

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Probably.

Just out of curiosity, how old is this girl? That might affect my answer.

And, unfortunately, I bet this is the type of shitty girl trying to be nice but being completely rude--I wouldn't be surprised if she calls it off like a night before for some BS reason.

It means you need to bone them both.

Did you actually use the word "date" when asking her to the movies?

It means you aren't gonna get any.Sorry.

Regardless, if a girl says "for safety" during a conversation about going to the movies, it's a non-starter. She's not worth it, anyway, even if she is just being super cautious.

Honestly in my experience (which has been shitty) this generally means they are looking to have a girls night out on your dime. Either way, this one will likely be a no-go.

HowDroll said:

Probably.

Just out of curiosity, how old is this girl? That might affect my answer.

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27, but it sounds like y'all basically agree with me in principle.

Ah well. Movie tickets are pretty darn far from breaking my bank, so I shall endeavor to enjoy myself and just be friendly.

There are worse things than having single female friends, particularly when they have other single female friends.

SpecialKO said:

What could this mean?

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The rest, I leave to you.

Ignore the original girl and flirt with her friend the whole time.

It will be hillarious

She's bringing a friend for safety? Does she think you're going to try and mug her after the previews?

David said:

Ignore the original girl and flirt with her friend the whole time.

It will be hillarious

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I have done this before. Always a good time.

phil said:

She's bringing a friend for safety? Does she think you're going to try and mug her after the previews?

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You're talking about a town where state investigators went in looking for evidence of cash extortion by city officials and came out with with an organ-trafficking ring headed by a local rabbi.

I'm not saying you're wrong, just pointing out that Northern NJ is weird.

Oh yeah, Jersey. 'Nuff said.

1 point from House SeraRelm.
Hate speech.

David said:

Ignore the original girl and flirt with her friend the whole time.

It will be hillarious

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This is actually probably your only shot at actually getting this girl.

HowDroll said:

This is actually probably your only shot at actually getting this girl.

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If that's what it takes to get her interested, I suspect she's definitely not worth the trouble.

They're Jersey girls, he can do better.

1 pt House SeraRelm.

SpecialKO said:

If that's what it takes to get her interested, I suspect she's definitely not worth the trouble.

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She might be worth some trouble, if you know what I mean.

Hey ElJuski, tell us again about that crazy girl you went out with?

Actually, she e-mailed me again last night. She mysteriously found my DVDs! So I am going to pick them up.

She really is a nutjob, though.

If you know what he means.

ElJuski said:

She might be worth some trouble, if you know what I mean.

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If we didn't work in the same office, I might agree.

SpecialKO said:

If we didn't work in the same office, I might agree.

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*raises finger*

*looks at Sera*

*keeps quiet*

you know what, Sera? You are a daydreamer. A Sassmouth. And, not infrequently, a bit of a gigglepuss.

Deal with it.



I'm on my phone, no image for you.






And god damn it, it's amazing out today and I have to cover for someone at work. FML.

Almost spit pickle juice at the screen from that gif. As if this computer didn't have enough problems.

Quotemander Prime said:

Almost spit pickle juice at the screen from that gif. As if this computer wasn't covered in enough liquids.

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FTFY

David said:

Ignore the original girl and flirt with her friend the whole time.

It will be hillarious

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I did this once...

The girl was cute.... but her friend was hotter and more easy to talk to (I already knew her as an acquaintance from another group of friends). Cute girl was NOT amused and I played coy regarding this.

Who brings someone hotter than them on a date anyways?

The cherry on top? I went out with the 2nd girl for 6 months.

And yes, I sent the cute girl a thank you e-mail.

Cute girl never replied and I have never seen her since.

I think she learned her lesson.

So has this "date" gone down yet, SpecialKO?

I never brought a friend for safety. Christ it's North Jersey. If you were taking her to Camden I'd say you'd all better have bodyguards.
Yeah she's full of crap. If you haven't gone on this date already I'd say find something else to do that night.

And there are decent Jersey Girls they just hide in the reference section at Barnes and Noble (at least I used to).

SeraRelm said:

They're Jersey girls, he can do better.

1 pt House SeraRelm.

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By 'better', did you mean 'easier'?

ThatNickGuy said:

So has this "date" gone down yet, SpecialKO?

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Nah, got cancelled on (nice call, guys). No real biggie, seeing as how it seemed a non-starter by that point not matter what.

WasabiPoptart said:

If you were taking her to Camden I'd say you'd all better have bodyguards.

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...Jesus Christ. I hope that's not speaking from personal experience.

And there are decent Jersey Girls they just hide in the reference section at Barnes and Noble (at least I used to).

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Dammit! And here I was spending all my time in the comic book and mythology sections!

Krisken said:

By 'better', did you mean 'easier'?

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She means both.

May I ask why she thought she needed someone there for "safety"?

Maybe she'd heard stories of how people go to the movie theater in my local mall and they come out with stuff that pushy vendors managed to sell to them. [/wiseass]

I truly don't know. I decided to not make a big deal of it once I learned the friend was female, since I figured that worst case, she was trying to keep it in the friend zone.

I keep thinking about this when I see this thread. Not really the same thing as what's going on and it really doesn't help anyone in any way but I'm posting it anyway.

deal with it.

SpecialKO said:

...Jesus Christ. I hope that's not speaking from personal experience.

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I don't think God can help anyone in Camden. Depending on the list you look at Camden ranks in the top 5 most dangerous cities in the US. I don't know about recently, but when I left NJ 8 years ago Camden had more murders per capita than any other city in the US.

WasabiPoptart said:

I don't think God can help anyone in Camden. Depending on the list you look at Camden ranks in the top 5 most dangerous cities in the US. I don't know about recently, but when I left NJ 8 years ago Camden had more murders per capita than any other city in the US.

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It's still on that list, if possibly not the top. I had the distinct unpleasure of accidentally getting off the highway to Philly at the exit right before the bridge...which went right into Camden. I GTFO as quickly as possible.

One does not simply... GTFO of Camden...

One does if one passes by a wall with bullet holes in it and has a car capable of U-turns.

Officer_Charon said:

One does not simply... GTFO of Camden...

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One does not simply ....aww fuck I made a wrong turn. Shit shit shit! We're in CAMDEN! Lock the doors and do NOT look at anyone even if I run them over with the car we are not stopping!

WasabiPoptart said:

One does not simply ....aww fuck I made a wrong turn. Shit shit shit! We're in CAMDEN! Lock the doors and do NOT look at anyone even if I run them over with the car we are not stopping!

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Apparently, you were in my car at the time I did this exact thing.

I've done it myself on my way home from Philly. Except I was alone at night.

Wait - Camden's even worse than DETROIT????

I know from experience that whenever they ask a friend to come along as a third wheel, they are not interested.

I know, I was the friend. She dragged me to Sea World because she was too polite to tell the guy she didn't want to date him and I was the safety net.

That's not being polite... that's being a duplicitous bitch. Just sayin'...

ScytheRexx said:

I know from experience that whenever they ask a friend to come along as a third wheel, they are not interested.

I know, I was the friend. She dragged me to Sea World because she was too polite to tell the guy she didn't want to date him and I was the safety net.

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...don't be that guy.

"Can I bring a friend?"

"No, I just wanted to hang out with you."

There, now you should never have this problem again in the future. Just because she chooses to beat around the bush doesn't mean you need to. Who knows, she might just be testing you to see if you have any self confidence.

ScytheRexx said:

I know from experience that whenever they ask a friend to come along as a third wheel, they are not interested.

I know, I was the friend. She dragged me to Sea World because she was too polite to tell the guy she didn't want to date him and I was the safety net.

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Instead of just telling him she didn't want to date him...

Hurting people's feelings sucks. I understand hoping to avoid it by dodging the situation.


Dooooodge.

That's not preventing hurt feelings, it's dragging it out. The foggy area comes when the girl thinks it's just socializing and the guy thinks it's a date, which is where this "bring a friend" thing can come into play as an innocent misunderstanding. Doing it as a replacement for saying "no" is not cool.

"No" should be in every person's vocabulary no matter the social situation, at the ready for use.

What he should've done was go on this date with the two ladies. Then, when the time was right, drop trou and ask them, "So, how about it?"

Agree with that. It works when friends are in denial about a breakup too. One guy friend in particular was kind of demonizing this girl who had simply found out after being together a while that they weren't at all compatible.

GUY: What's wrong with her?

ME: What's wrong with her is that she doesn't want you, and it hurts. She doesn't hate you; she doesn't think you're a bad person; you're just being rejected by an individual as a compatible partner, and it hurts.

GUY: *silence, drinking, acceptance, hug*

...That agree was for QP.

Cajungal said:

...That agree was for QP.

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But Nick's ninja timing was hilarious.

People that pull shit like the girl in the OP aren't being nice, they're being selfish cowards. It's not the end of the world, but it's a sheisty move. No excuse to do it, unless you're fourteen and don't know any better.

Maybe they are fourteen and just really mature for their age?

Nicarus?

Yeah....no. Please no. I joke about it like that, but given that I'm getting into Elementary teaching, I really shouldn't.

I was set up once on a blind date by my best friend's girlfriend, Stephanie, who felt that this girl she knew of would hit it off with me... "You're totally her type." I had nothing planning that weekend so I shrugged and said "Sure, why not?"

We just instructed by Stephanie to meet at a certain place in the mall and take it from there. I personally didn't like the arrangement but Stephanie was so excited about it that I just couldn't say no to her. So, I went to the mall looking for a girl wearing a white scarf and mittens (it was March and cold as fuck). I arrived a little early and immediately saw a girl wearing white gloves and mittens at the exact spot I was instructed. Not to be shallow but she wasn't the most attractive girl (she had bangs and I hate bangs with a weird reddish hue hair, big black eyes and a beak of a nose).

Nevertheless, I had made a promise to my friend and approached her and introduced myself. I quickly realized that I wasn't attracted to Linda but I also didn't like her personality as well. I knew from the get-go that this wasn't for me.

We made some awkward small talk at first while my mind was racing to get out of this predicament. My eyes wandered to her breasts (they were actually quite nice) and I stared at them hoping she'd call me a pig and run off but this simply urged her to continue to chat with me. She finally asked if I wanted to go get a beer and trying to persuade her to not like me I told her I didn't drink. "Neither do I! That's great!" she said.

Damn.

Next, she asked if I wanted to go get some dinner somewhere. Trying to be one of those creepy guys who tries to get in the bedroom quickly, I told her we should skip dinner and go straight back to my house as I stared at her bountiful breasts. She paused a second and she was delighted by this proposal. I was beside myself.

We arrived at my apartment and I asked her to stay outside while I tidied a few things up. I ran into my clean apartment and strung trash everywhere hoping she would think I lived in a pig sty. Unfortunately, she was watching me through the window, laughing. "You're silly!" she said as I let her in my house, completely disregarding what she had just seen.

She asked if I wanted to watch a movie. Figuring I had come to the point of no return, I decided we would watch Gladiator, firstly since it's totally not a date movie and secondly it was a movie that I have nearly memorized word-for-word. Trying to annoy her, I recited the dialogue from the first half hour of the movie. She was giving me this weird look, so I figured it was working and she was annoyed out of her mind.

Wrong.

"That is amazing! I love you!" she said loudly and asked me to keep on going.

I was stunned.

Now amused by the situation and the fact I did notice she did have a nice form to her body and she didn't mention anything about me staring at her body... I complied. I recited all the movie minus a handful of lines here and there. She watched me in awe, not even glancing at the TV screen.

When the movie ended we made small talk. It was getting late and I asked to drive her back to her car at the mall. She said "I have a better idea" she took my hand and put it on her breast and started undressing in front of me.

This was probably the easiest lay in my life. There's a reason why doggie style and lights exist.

What does this have to do with your story?

Absolutely nothing.

So while you're wondering what you need to do when someone asks you if they bring someone with them with the date, I tell you, just go with it.

Be cool.

You never know what could happen.

Quotemander Prime said:

Instead of just telling him she didn't want to date him...

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What can I say, I was 16 and not exactly the smartest guy at that. The fact I also had a small crush on her myself didn't help. I made sure never to have that happen again.

As with so much in life, having a little bit of real self-esteem can get you through so much...

ScytheRexx said:

What can I say, I was 16 and not exactly the smartest guy at that. The fact I also had a small crush on her myself didn't help. I made sure never to have that happen again.

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Hey, I wasn't blaming you. Just that's what she should have done.

Officer_Charon said:

As with so much in life, having a little bit of real self-esteem can get you through so much...

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Pretty much.

Jay said:

*brofist story*

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Stories like that are why the brofist was invented.