I hate my damn roommate. I am close to beating the shit out of him.
I'm probably going to come off as xenophobe, but I don't fucking care at this point. My asshat of a roommate is from kazakhstan - he's a mustache away from being Borat; at least in annoyance.
He doesn't have a car, but I don't mind giving him a lift to the store every now and again. However, he'll ask for a lift the day before, and the next day, he doesn't roll in until close to midnight. He then seems all surprised that I am headed for bed.
He leaves dishes and food out all the damn time. He leaves milk, eggs, raw meat, anything out all day. He cooked chicken soup one morning and left it sitting on the stove the entire day. He brought a bowl to my room at 11pm for me to try. I told him no thanks, I'm a Microbiologist, and what you're asking me to do is ridiculous. I said it more polite than that, but seriously.
He must have turrets because he is constantly clapping his hands loudly or will just burst into some sort of Kazakh/Russian shout. He repeats the same lyrics from two songs over and over and over. "Wild horses couldn't drag me away" and "It finally happened - I'm slightly mad."
He slams every damn door in the house every damn time. Bedroom door, bathroom door, refrigerator, cabiners, etc.
I came home tonight. Made dinner. Ate. Chatted with him about Latin phrases, and Condolezza Rice (odd topics, I know), and around 11, I tell him good night, and that I have to get up early in the morning. 10 minutes later, he knocks on my door and asks if I will take him to Whataburger!!! I repeat that I have to get up, and that I am tired. A few minutes later he's in the bathroom yelling "Wild Horses!!" I jump out of bed and open my door and scream "SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!! I AM TRYING TO FUCKING SLEEP FOR FUCK'S SAKE!!!!!" Now, my adrenaline is going and I am pissed beyond belief. What a fucking douche. I am going to kick him out as soon as possible. FUCK.
I just want some peace and fucking quiet. Man, I need a place to myself!!