Outrageous Claims thread

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Rob King

Rob King

Newfoundland is a tropical paradise, filled with intellectual yet well-grounded individuals who work hard for what they get.

And yet I still hate it.

(Wait, is this the outrageous claims thread, or the opposite day thread?)
 
Dave

Dave

Staff member
I once circumnavigated the world on a tricycle fitted specifically for land and sea travel. Or should I say I NEARLY circumnavigated the world. I almost made it but ran into something West of Acapulco.
 
Vagabond

Vagabond

Socks aren't woven--they're bred.

Most of the missing socks left this world in search of their ancestral breeding grounds. The rest were consumed by the ones that left, to supply the energy to make the trip. They will never eat another meal--they die after they spawn, like salmon.
 
Vagabond

Vagabond

Coldplay isn't actually a band--it's an elaborate psychological experiment.

Soon the experiment will be completed.

It will not end well for the human race.
 
HCGLNS

HCGLNS

Freemasons run the womens fashion industry as a front to deflect from social injustices inflicted upon European women who suffer from gravitic depression.

Dave is twenty-six and votes Republican at least twice every election.
 
General Specific

General Specific

There really are little men that live in your TV. However, they do not act out the programs or paint the images or any such nonsense. They live in there because the refrigerator is too cold. Their real job is making mayonnaise.
 
Morphine

Morphine

I was making a cake once and then realized I had no mixer. I trained 100 ladybugs to move their legs in such a way that when I put them in the batter they'd mix and fluff it all up. Delicious cake, I tell you.
 
drawn_inward

drawn_inward

McDonalds shares proud history amongst Scotland's greatest warriors, William Wallace. The McDonald clan were well known for their haggis and other boiled meats, and their speediness in cookery. After the defeat at Falkirk, Wallace was a fugitive. He was later caught, by the Brits, going to a McDonald clansmen's shop for a bite to eat. He wasn't the last to find death after going to a McDonald's.
 
rac3r_x

rac3r_x

I once starred opposite John Wayne in a classic sci-fi movie and he told me, I was a greater american than him.
 
Cheesy1

Cheesy1

I'm not really Cheesy1, but a time traveler from the future who's trapped in his body. That's how I travel through time, by occupying the bodies of others in the past, driven by an unknown force to change history for the better. And so I find myself leaping from life to life, striving to put right what once went wrong. And hoping each time that my next leap . . .

. . . will be the leap home.
 
Vagabond

Vagabond

There are only 5 different flavors: chicken, beef, chocolate, banana and crunchy.

Everything else is just an exaggeration, or a lie.
 
blotsfan

blotsfan

I speak Russian. In French.
My mom has a tattoo that says "son."
My blood smells like cologne.
I once had an awkward moment, just to see how it felt.
 
P

Philosopher B.

I shot a man in Reno. My reason: so that I could comfortably observe him expire.
 
M

Matt²

bigcountry23;385325][QUOTE=LordRavage said:
One time, I simply walked into Mordor.
Click to expand...
I have an issue with this one. Everyone knows one does not simply WALK into Mordor.

I believe everything else in this thread.[/QUOTE]

I skipped rope into Mordor. It was fun, and the orcs couldn't see me, because it was so awesome!
Unfortunately I had to do it twice, because the first time I had forgotten the ring!
 
L

LordRavage

bigcountry23;385325][QUOTE=LordRavage said:
One time, I simply walked into Mordor.
Click to expand...
I have an issue with this one. Everyone knows one does not simply WALK into Mordor.

I believe everything else in this thread.[/QUOTE]

You wound me good sir!

*Pistols at dawn........in Mordor!

Cajungal;385327][QUOTE=bigcountry23;385325][QUOTE=LordRavage said:
One time, I simply walked into Mordor.
Click to expand...
I have an issue with this one. Everyone knows one does not simply WALK into Mordor.

I believe everything else in this thread.[/QUOTE]

I was watching. It was really more of a sashay.[/QUOTE]

I found it to be a little more like a jig my dear. ;)
 
E

Element 117

Matt² said:
well I was gonna go on a rant about how nobody has gotten the full definition of "outrageous" as laid out in the OP, meaning it's not just a simple thing..

but now I just don't care.
meh. (shrug)
Click to expand...
HOW DARE YOU FAKE TAKE OFFENSE AND PLAY THE WOUNDED APATHETIC CARD??!! HOW DARE YOU?!

how was that?
 
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