How would you defend yourself if you had a criminal organization after you

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Necronic

Necronic

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I'm watching Hostell II right now, and in the beginning the dude that survived the last movie gets killed, and it got me thinking. If I had some powerful yet underground criminal organization after me what would I do?

I think I would have to trust someone in authority, and I would definitely set up dead man switches (if I don't contact 20 different lawyers each month then all the details of my situation go out to all members of the press).

Then I'm not sure. Would I contact the police/FBI and have them protect me? Or would I move out into the wilderness and move into a series of caverns and set up traps all along it. Or would I stay in civilized society but go completely off the grid.

I think wherever I was staying I would set up a lot of traps. Simple things like shotguns wired to doorways and claymores. I think I could also wire some traps to myself as well. I would have to think about exactly how to do it. Although I have no idea how I would get the equipment necessary. I could join a paramilitary organization like the IRA or something (although I'm not Irish...)

I would probably have to enter a life of crime, to a degree. With my education I could start a drug business, that could fund my defenses and also help me stay off the grid. Or I could become a day laborer, something like that.
 
M

Matt²

I would go to Ape Cave, Washington, and wait with heavy munitions.
 
Necronic

Necronic

Staff member
The only trick to wilderness stuff is that you have to be able to keep the deadman switches up, and of course feed yourself.
 
C

Cuyval Dar

Either go to ground in the wilderness, and/or take advantage of a concealed weapons permit.
 
AshburnerX

AshburnerX

I know there is an American Reporter, living in Japan, that has literally had the Yakuza after him for years because he revealed the FBI's involvement with getting one of their top guys a new kidney/liver. He basically lives in a non-disclosed location in the city, under police watch 24/7, but he is still able to do his job thanks to his contacts in Japan. He's been on the Daily Show too, so you guys could look for his interview.

I think this is the guy's book, but I could be wrong.
 
Necronic

Necronic

Staff member
Cuyval Dar said:
Either go to ground in the wilderness, and/or take advantage of a concealed weapons permit.
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Permit? At this point you have to be off the books or they can find you. I guess you could get one under an alias. But honestly I think I would be armed most of the time with at least a gun and probably 10 concealed knives/razors.
 
W

Wasabi Poptart

I would talk to some people I know who know some people I don't know nuthin' about if you know what I mean.
 
bhamv3

bhamv3

Convince the criminal organization I'm more valuable alive than dead.

This is similar to my strategy for a zombie apocalypse, namely join Team Zombie. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
 
David

David

I think your best bet would be going off the grid in as big of a city as you can move to. Get yourself blended in and indiscreet. Hiding out in the wilderness would risk you getting the reputation as "the crazy guy who lives out in the wilderness" somewhere if somebody spotted you, and could make you easier to locate. Once somebody with enough resources knows where you are, game over, doesn't matter how many traps you lay.

This logic should NOT be applied to zombie apocalypse. Get as far away from any civilization as you can in that case.
 
M

Matt²

yeah but when the zombies infect the sealife, even the ocean won't be safe... I am NOT looking forward to seeing zombie orcas and great white sharks leaping out of the sea at people!
 
Necronic

Necronic

Staff member
Soliloquy;391110][QUOTE=Docseverin said:
Notify homeland security then.
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You and your rational answers.[/QUOTE]

Seriously doc, you are pulling a Schrute here:

[quote='in response to the question "what book would you bring to a desert island"]
Dwight Schrute: Fine, Physician's Desk Reference...
Jim Halpert: Nice, smart.
Dwight Schrute: ...hollowed out, inside: waterproof matches, iodine tablets, beet seeds, protein bars, NASA blanket and, in case I get bored, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. No, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Question: did my shoes come off in the plane crash?
[/quote]
 
David

David

Matt² said:
yeah but when the zombies infect the sealife, even the ocean won't be safe... I am NOT looking forward to seeing zombie orcas and great white sharks leaping out of the sea at people!
Click to expand...
That's assuming whatever's causing zombies can spread to non-human species. If every living thing on earth is susceptible, might as well lay down and wait to die.
 
Fun Size

Fun Size

I would move constantly, carrying nothing but my messenger bag and the soundtrack that played at the end of The Incredible Hulk so I would have music as I walked away from whatever town I had my latest adventure in, looking back longingly before I disappear again.

Well, that or I would notify the FBI and hope for the best.
 
drawn_inward

drawn_inward

If you can't go to anyone in authority, find some militia-types to get contacts for ammo/weapons. Get all the survival books you can find. Buy a bunch of MREs. Go live off the land, and Grizzly Adams it until the heat dies down, and then come back at them when they least expect it!
 
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