Whine like a baby, now with 500% more drama!

M

makare

lol no that was long before law school. I cant believe ive gotten myself into this conversation XD but I was referring to discomfort relating to holding it for a hour.
 
checkeredhat

checkeredhat

makare said:
lol no that was long before law school. I cant believe ive gotten myself into this conversation XD but I was referring to discomfort relating to holding it for a hour.
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Oh, well then this has gone on for nearly two months. And yeah, I'm surprised (well, not THAT surprised) that post got that much of a response. Let's talk about something else now.
 
David

David

I've gone without for up to 3 days while camping and having a phobia of squatting for it in the wilderness.
 
North_Ranger

North_Ranger

Staff member
Going back to the poo-withholding issue... My personal record is three days.

It was when I was in the army, and we had some pretty intense bivouac training sessions, meaning that any second we could be getting orders. And because going to squeeze some pastry would have necessitated
1.) removing two light bazookas
2.) removing the assault rifle
3.) removing the heavy assault belt
4.) removing the shrapnel vest and
5.) opening several layers of clothing to get to the suspenders
before you could crap in the woods... well, you can't do that very quickly, and we were constantly on edge.

Needless to say, by the time we got back I just about detonated the toilet.
 
fade

fade

Staff member
North_Ranger said:
Going back to the poo-withholding issue... My personal record is three days.

It was when I was in the army, and we had some pretty intense bivouac training sessions, meaning that any second we could be getting orders. And because going to squeeze some pastry would have necessitated
1.) removing two light bazookas
2.) removing the assault rifle
3.) removing the heavy assault belt
4.) removing the shrapnel vest and
5.) opening several layers of clothing to get to the suspenders
before you could crap in the woods... well, you can't do that very quickly, and we were constantly on edge.

Needless to say, by the time we got back I just about detonated the toilet.
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Yeah, my wife says that she learned to hold urine for 12 hours when she was a patrol cop, because she swears the utility belt was designed specifically to prevent female cops from peeing.
 
fade

fade

Staff member
Here's a whine. Why can't I live in the city I love? I did my postdoc in Boston, and I would dearly love to move back there. There just aren't any jobs for my skillset there, and every one I see, I apply to. When those counselors are telling you to stay in school growing up, they ought to add, "But stop at a master's degree, or you start screwing yourself over again."
 
phil

phil

I like to think that each rant thread has it's own specific level for every kind of problem.


Regular rant thread is for real problems. I just lost my job.

Minor rant thread is for less serious but still annoying problems. My racist aunt is coming into town and my family has to pretend like we don't notice it.

This thread is for things that aren't really problems. I like to think of it like first world problems from reddit. I hate having to pay as much as I do for the miracle that is clean running water.
 
checkeredhat

checkeredhat

So if I wanted to complain that I'm moving on Tuesday and only have my dad and one other person coming to help me, that'd be the Minor Rants thread, but if I wanted to complain that packing sucks cause I have too much stuff, that'd be here?
 
phil

phil

Too much stuff that you think is so nice that you have to keep it, specifically.


Like if you just owned a bunch of shit you'd just throw it out.
 
Denbrought

Denbrought

makare said:
I just stumbled this http://www.cis.upenn.edu/~udani/humor/puns.html
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I don't understand these two:
...This skeleton walks into a bar and says, "I'd like a beer and a mop..."
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...It was a doctor's regular habit to stop off at a bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home and, aware of his habit, the bartender would always have the drink waiting for him at precisely 5:18 PM. One afternoon as the end of the work-day neared the bartender was dismayed to find he was out of hazelnut extract but, thinking quickly, he threw together a daiquiri made with hickory nuts and set it on the bar. The doctor came in at his regular time, took one sip of the drink, then exclaimed: "This isn't a hazelnut daiquiri", to which the bartender replied, "No, I'm sorry, it's a hickory daiquiri, doc."
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Explain? >_>"
 
Allen who is Quiet

Allen who is Quiet

When something is referred to as a skeleton, it is assumed that they are without any other major organs. Thus, if the skeleton were to pour any liquid into its mouth, rather than following any digestive systems, it would end up in a puddle on the floor. The skeleton preemptively asks for a mop, aware of the impending mess that will happen once he starts to imbibe.

For the second, the punch line sounds similar to a line in a nursery rhyme, making it reference humor.

ps: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DontExplainTheJoke
 
M

makare

I guess I am a weirdo because usually explanations do not ruin jokes for me.
 
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