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A lady...

Dec 9, 2009#1

Jay

... came up to me on the street and pointed at my leather jacket and sneered, "You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?". I replied in a psychotic tone, "I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too."

Her face?

Priceless.

Dec 9, 2009#2

Shannow

This never happened.

Dec 9, 2009#3

Espy

Shannow said:
This never happened.

There are other threads that need you now. Go to them. Save them.

Dec 9, 2009#4

Shannow

Espy;312289][quote=Shannow said:
This never happened.

There are other threads that need you now. Go to them. Save them.[/QUOTE]

I am only one man. But I do what I can to help you all.

Dec 9, 2009#5

Denbrought

Shannow;312290][quote=Espy;312289][quote=Shannow said:
This never happened.

There are other threads that need you now. Go to them. Save them.[/quote]

I am only one man. But I do what I can to help you all.[/QUOTE]

Just like Jesus on Quantum Leap.

Dec 9, 2009#6

fade

Ha ha. Awesome.

Dec 9, 2009#7

Jay

Dec 9, 2009#8

Wasabi Poptart

Oh if only you had a picture of her face.

Dec 9, 2009#9

Shannow

Thats okay, if it makes you feel better to make a picture when you could not say anything to the lady who pointed at your coat on the street, then so be it.

---------- Post added at 04:26 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:25 PM ----------

Denbrought said:
Just like Jesus on Quantum Leap.

This is true....my son.

Dec 9, 2009#10

Jay

Don't feel sad...don't feel blue...Frankenstein was ugly too...

Dec 9, 2009#11

Shegokigo

NSFW:

http://img163.imageshack.us/img163/9458/priceless.jpg

Dec 9, 2009#12

Shannow

SeriousJay said:
Don't feel sad...don't feel blue...Frankenstein was ugly too...

hahahahahaha, nice one!

Dec 9, 2009#13

Covar

Because a cow was killed just for the leather. :eek:

rly: I'm sure many a delicious medium rare steak was eaten to make your leather jacket.

I hate nuts like that, they're like the morons who claim using a ton of paper is the cause of deforestation. Because in the entire history of paper it never occurred to anyone to farm trees. :rolleyes:

Dec 9, 2009#14

Silver Jelly

Covar said:
I'm sure many a delicious medium rare steak was eaten to make your leather jacket.

Wich is another reason why medium rare steaks are awesome!

Dec 9, 2009#15

Denbrought

Dec 9, 2009#16

Green_Lantern

Denbrought said:

I love smbc.

Also, really, I am amazed by these people, congratulations on the answer SJ.

Dec 9, 2009#17

Chibibar

heh.. these people entertain me

Dec 9, 2009#18

LittleSin

Are you sure you said that?

Not to back Shannow or anything but there have pleanty of times that someone has said something to me and I couldn't respond right away because I'm shocked by how abropt it was. Then, later, what I should have said comes to me.

This sounds like one of those instances.

Dec 9, 2009#19

HCGLNS

Wow, thats a flashback to 1991. A small underfed student ran up to me and had a similar question for me then.

Dec 9, 2009#20

Dave

One time my wife and I had the kids in the mall. We were all wearing Dallas Cowboys jackets. I was wearing one of mine, my wife was wearing my other one because hers was wet. My son was wearing his and my daughter was wearing the one my son grew out of - mainly because it was funny by that point.

We got into the elevator at the mall and this snooty woman looks at all of us, rolled her eyes and said, "You know, it's not hard to be Dallas Cowboys fans!" (This was in the 1990's when they were really good.)

I looked right at her and said, "Or to see that you like Hagen Daas, you bitch."

Her face WAS priceless and I have a witness to it.

Dec 9, 2009#21

Tinwhistler

when I was in my 20's, and I flew over the country for Metro Networks, I once met a hari krishna in the airport. He was trying to sell me a copy of the Bhagavad Gita. He got all excited when I'd told him I'd read it. The conversation was short, and went something like this:

him: "So, you're a vegetarian then?"
me: "Nope, just because I've read your book doesn't mean I buy into it."
"But scientists say that cows know when they're about to be slaughtered, and release fear hormones. It's like you're eating their fear!"
"Stop it man. You're making me hungry."

Dec 9, 2009#22

The Lovely Boehner

Shannow said:
This never happened.

Dec 9, 2009#23

Green_Lantern

LittleSin said:
Are you sure you said that?

Not to back Shannow or anything but there have pleanty of times that someone has said something to me and I couldn't respond right away because I'm shocked by how abropt it was. Then, later, what I should have said comes to me.

This sounds like one of those instances.

The french have a expression for it, is something like "Spirit of the stairs", I know what I mean, so times I think about the past, year before, and think about something good or smart, though not always in a confrotation.

HCGLNS said:
Wow, thats a flashback to 1991. A small underfed student ran up to me and had a similar question for me then.

Your reaction?

Tinwhistler said:
when I was in my 20's, and I flew over the country for Metro Networks, I once met a hari krishna in the airport. He was trying to sell me a copy of the Bhagavad Gita. He got all excited when I'd told him I'd read it. The conversation was short, and went something like this:

him: "So, you're a vegetarian then?"
me: "Nope, just because I've read your book doesn't mean I buy into it."
"But scientists say that cows know when they're about to be slaughtered, and release fear hormones. It's like you're eating their fear!"
"Stop it man. You're making me hungry."

hmmm.... fear.

Dec 9, 2009#24

Allen, who is Quiet

Was she Korean?

Dec 9, 2009#25

Cajungal

I usually just clam up and think about what I'd like to say. I rarely have the balls to say something. But when I was in the dorms, my roommate's friends pissed me off so often that I just had to.

So, I'm short, overweight, and brunette. My roommate was too, but we looked nothing alike. My nose is long, hers was short and up-turned. My hair's dark, hers had traces of blond. And our weight was distributed completely differently as well. Long story short, you could describe us both as short, overweight, and brunette, but we're not identical.

But every time her dopey friends were in the room, they'd say something like "It's soooo weird, you could be twins!!!" They were all bleached-blond stick figures who, I'll admit, all looked the same to me... but I'd had it.

ME: So all non-skinny, non-blond people look alike to you?

.....O.O

I didn't see them much after that, which was fine with me.

Dec 9, 2009#26

Adammon

At my great-aunts funeral, I was a pall-bearer. Alas, I didn't know this great aunt very well, and Catholic funerals are the bomb, yo, so I was feeling particularly smartassed.

As the deacon walked in front of us, blessing us each with "Peace Be With You", I could not hold it in anymore and after I was blessed with "Peace Be With You" I responded with

"And May the Force Be With You"

My uncle burst out laughing and my dad smacked me in the back of the head - but it was worth it.

Dec 9, 2009#27

Cajungal

Love it.

Dec 9, 2009#28

Jay

Allen said:
Was she Korean?

Why yes.

How did you know?

Dec 9, 2009#29

HCGLNS

Green_Lantern;312406][quote=HCGLNS said:
Wow, thats a flashback to 1991. A small underfed student ran up to me and had a similar question for me then.

Your reaction?
[/QUOTE]

SUS: "Do you know how many animals died to make you that."
Me: "Yes, I do. Do you?"

Dec 9, 2009#30

Green_Lantern

Adammon said:
At my great-aunts funeral, I was a pall-bearer. Alas, I didn't know this great aunt very well, and Catholic funerals are the bomb, yo, so I was feeling particularly smartassed.

As the deacon walked in front of us, blessing us each with "Peace Be With You", I could not hold it in anymore and after I was blessed with "Peace Be With You" I responded with

"And May the Force Be With You"

My uncle burst out laughing and my dad smacked me in the back of the head - but it was worth it.

That was just terrible, terrible thing to do.

My congratulations

Dec 9, 2009#31

Bowielee

Reminds me of one of my favorite movie quotes

Hedwig: Ladies and gentlemen, do you like the pelt? Be honest, because some *bitch* stopped me on the way in. "What poor and unfortunate creature had to die for you to wear that?"
[pause]
Hedwig: My Aunt Trudy, I replied.

Dec 9, 2009#32

Shannow

LittleSin said:
Are you sure you said that?

Not to back Shannow or anything but there have pleanty of times that someone has said something to me and I couldn't respond right away because I'm shocked by how abropt it was. Then, later, what I should have said comes to me.

This sounds like one of those instances.

Pretty much this.

Dec 9, 2009#33

Chippy

Muttering it as she walks away doesn't count.

Dec 9, 2009#34

ThatGrinningIdiot!

Chippy said:
Muttering it as she walks away doesn't count.

Sneak in behind, then punch them in the back of the head.

That always counts.

Dec 9, 2009#35

Twitch

A lady...

1. Doesn't leave her escort
1B. It isn't fair, it isn't nice.
2. Doesn't wander all over the room and blow one some other guys dice.
3. Doesn't flirt with strangers
3B.She'd have a heart, she'd be nice

Dec 10, 2009#36

ZenMonkey

Twitch said:
A lady...

1. Doesn't leave her escort
1B. It isn't fair, it isn't nice.
2. Doesn't wander all over the room and blow one some other guys dice.
3. Doesn't flirt with strangers
3B.She'd have a heart, she'd be nice

Paired with your avatar, this is about the best thing I've read in weeks.

Dec 10, 2009#37

filmfanatic

Green_Lantern said:
The french have a expression for it, is something like "Spirit of the stairs", I know what I mean, so times I think about the past, year before, and think about something good or smart, though not always in a confrotation.

The term you are thinking of is l'esprit d'escalier.

Dec 10, 2009#38

@Li3n

SeriousJay said:

I don't know... plenty of people i know are dickwads both on and off the internet.

Dec 10, 2009#39

Bowielee

Amorous Vyxen;312705][quote=Bowielee said:
Reminds me of one of my favorite movie quotes

Hedwig: Ladies and gentlemen, do you like the pelt? Be honest, because some *bitch* stopped me on the way in. \"What poor and unfortunate creature had to die for you to wear that?\"
[pause]
Hedwig: My Aunt Trudy, I replied.

Wow. Someone here watched that movie? Yay!

Also XD @ Shego's linked pic.[/QUOTE]

Hedwig and the Angry Inch is one of my all time favorite movies, John Cameron Mitchell is simply brilliant in that movie. It also has one of the best soundtracks I've ever heard.

Dec 10, 2009#40

Twitch

ZenMonkey;312638][quote=Twitch said:
A lady...

1. Doesn't leave her escort
1B. It isn't fair, it isn't nice.
2. Doesn't wander all over the room and blow one some other guys dice.
3. Doesn't flirt with strangers
3B.She'd have a heart, she'd be nice

Paired with your avatar, this is about the best thing I've read in weeks.[/QUOTE]
It's always a pleasure when someone enjoys a post.

Dec 10, 2009#41

Espy

Re: A lady...

Dec 10, 2009#42

Cajungal

^OH MY GOD, I was thinking about posting that, but then I thought it would be too silly!

Dec 10, 2009#43

Espy

Cajungal said:
^OH MY GOD, I was thinking about posting that, but then I thought it would be too silly!

If it's to silly for you to post, it's JUST RIGHT for me.

Dec 10, 2009#44

Espy

Amorous Vyxen;312998][quote=Cajungal said:
^OH MY GOD, I was thinking about posting that, but then I thought it would be too silly!

I considered it too and due to this thread the song had been in my head a few times throughout the day.[/QUOTE]

I like to think I meet ALLLLLLL the ladies needs here. :unibrow:

Dec 10, 2009#45

Allen, who is Quiet

But what about my needs?

Dec 10, 2009#46

Fun Size

See, all I get is "Dude looks like..." from this.

Dec 10, 2009#47

Espy

Allen said:
But what about my needs?

Since when did you have needs?

Dec 11, 2009#48

Null

Espy;313008][quote=Allen said:
But what about my needs?

Since when did you have needs?[/QUOTE]

About as long as SJ's had internet balls. These things may or may not be related.

Dec 11, 2009#49

Joe Johnson

Fun Size said:
See, all I get is "Dude looks like..." from this.

"...Jeff Bridges"???

Dec 11, 2009#50

Green_Lantern

filmfanatic;312644][quote=Green_Lantern said:
The french have a expression for it, is something like "Spirit of the stairs", I know what you mean, so times I think about the past, year before, and think about something good or smart, though not always in a confrotation.

The term you are thinking of is l'esprit d'escalier.[/QUOTE]

Yes, that the one, thanks.

Dec 11, 2009#51

LordRendar

Dec 11, 2009#52

SeraRelm

Someone at work mentioned that if someone didn't like the product which they purchased (as a gift) it could be returned no problem...

Unfortunately, right after them, I blurted out in a happy tone "Just like orphans!"

Dec 11, 2009#53

Fun Size

Genius!

Dec 11, 2009#54

Dave

SeraRelm said:
Someone at work mentioned that if someone didn't like the product which they purchased (as a gift) it could be returned no problem...

Unfortunately, right after them, I blurted out in a happy tone "Just like orphans!"

And this is why we love Sera.

Dec 11, 2009#55

SeraRelm

Fortunately the customer laughed.

Dec 11, 2009#56

Cajungal

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