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by protecting the freedom of the internet a little bit

http://www.engadget.com/2012/12/05/house-passes-unanimous-resolution-ban-UN-internet-regulation/

Well, history has shown time and again that there is nothing quite like an external threat to unite a nation.

Call me cynical, but I agree with TommiR. This is probably less "the Internet should be free" and more "no one gets to run the Internet but us."

yeah the land of the free and home of the brave still regularly blows up children so-

Charlie Don't Surf said:

yeah the land of the free and home of the brave still regularly blows up children so-

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You got a problem with it? Move.

Gared said:

You got a problem with it? Move.

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nah, I'll just keep voting for candidates that aren't war criminals (yet)

edit: also, nice implication that you don't have a problem with the United States Military using your tax dollars to send a missile up a 10 year old's ass-crack, ooh-rah[DOUBLEPOST=1354764411][/DOUBLEPOST]I'M PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN, SINCE AT LEAST I KNOW I'M FREE

http://thehill.com/blogs/global-aff...rejects-un-treaty-for-disabled-rights-in-vote

Charlie Don't Surf said:

nah, I'll just keep voting for candidates that aren't war criminals (yet)

edit: also, nice implication that you don't have a problem with the United States Military using your tax dollars to send a missile up a 10 year old's ass-crack, ooh-rah[DOUBLEPOST=1354764411][/DOUBLEPOST]I'M PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN, SINCE AT LEAST I KNOW I'M FREE

http://thehill.com/blogs/global-aff...rejects-un-treaty-for-disabled-rights-in-vote

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I think his post was more annoyance that you would bring up something completely unrelated to the threads subject just so you can whine about something. Keep telling yourself that everyone is against you though.

the United States proudly stands with these noble and progressive nations in still having the death penalty

Charlie's on a bender tonight!

Shakey said:

I think his post was more annoyance that you would bring up something completely unrelated to the threads subject just so you can whine about something. Keep telling yourself that everyone is against you though.

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thread subject is literally "U.S. gov restored my faith", and I am posting examples of how the US gov lost my faith/respect/whatever

things I think are a little bit more important than internet regulation jerking-offs

Charlie, you posting for halbucks or something? What does capital punishment have to do with the House voting against UN control of the Internet?

EDIT: Huh, ok, guess that explains it.

So because there are other things more important we should ignore the things they do correctly? I mean, China does terrible things to its people, but when they send over $30 billion in aid to Africa I'm still going to applaud.

Dave said:

China does terrible things to its people, .

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I know. They let me live here.

Terrik said:

I know. They let me live here.

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I'm talking more about forced abortions, genital mutilations and the occasional disappearance of dissidents. Among other things.

Charlie Don't Surf said:

thread subject is literally "U.S. gov restored my faith", and I am posting examples of how the US gov lost my faith/respect/whatever

things I think are a little bit more important than internet regulation jerking-offs

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And you really thought that The_Khan suddenly decided that the US was fully restored to glory because of this one move? Either way, thread title aside that's not what the thread subject was about.

Dave said:

I'm talking more about forced abortions, genital mutilations and the occasional disappearance of dissidents. Among other things.

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Genital mutilation? 0_o I just googled that and I couldn't find anything.

Terrik said:

Genital mutilation? 0_o I just googled that and I couldn't find anything.

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Hmm. I just looked it up as well and it seems to be more Muslim and African than Chinese. Sorry about that! I could have sworn I'd heard of it happening there.

Yeah, they go directly to full-body mutilation.

Charlie Don't Surf is easily the funniest person on the entire forum. Bar none. GasBandit is a close second though.

Gilgamesh said:

Charlie Don't Surf is easily the funniest person on the entire forum. Bar none.

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You know, I always want to call you Gil, just so we can have the conversation that happens at 1:11.

Dave said:

You know, I always want to call you Gil, just so we can have the conversation that happens at 1:11.

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Sure, if I can do the obvious cliche:

Never heard THAT one before!

Dave said:

Never heard THAT one before!

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Yep, hence.... obvious cliche part? I just grew up on Cheech and Chong and still am such a fan that EVERY time I hear Dave I can't help it.

Gilgamesh said:

EVERY time I hear Dave I can't help it.

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Dave's not here, man

Heh, 397-0 vote. Sometimes even congress gets something right, amazingly enough.

Dave said:

I'm talking more about forced abortions, genital mutilations and the occasional disappearance of dissidents. Among other things.

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Sending escaped North Koreans back to North Korea...

Krisken said:

Sending escaped North Koreans back to North Korea...

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What's the other option? Let them stay and deprive them of their unicorns?

Now who's the villain?

Terrik said:

What's the other option? Let them stay and deprive them of their unicorns?

Now who's the villain?

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Clearly it's the unicorns' fault. If they'd never existed, none of this would have happened.

Charlie... you're an 'interesting' individual. a bit violent, but still 'interesting'.

I haven't heard of any genital mutilation in China.

Those unicorns on the other hand, they be cool like the sexiest man of the year

Depends on what you call g enitals. Mutilating secondary sexual characteristics used to be relatively common in China.
Then again, it was over here as well, just different secondary sexual characteristics. *shrug*

That said, I'm slowly starting to have more faith in the US government than in the Belgian one, that's how bad they're doing over here

Bubble181 said:

That said, I'm slowly starting to have more faith in the US government than in the Belgian one, that's how bad they're doing over here

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Faith, to some degree, means predictability. I have faith the US government will do the wrong thing most of the time.

A predictable bad government can be seen as better than an unpredictable bad government.

Charlie Don't Surf said:

the United States proudly stands with these noble and progressive nations in still having the death penalty

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The important part of that map is the key saying "Legal form of punishment for certain offences"

While I disagree with the death penalty there is a big difference in using it for premeditated & mass murder, and executing people for apostasy or homosexuality.

mroosc1979 said:

While I disagree with the death penalty there is a big difference in using it for premeditated & mass murder, and executing people for apostasy or homosexuality.

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the United States isn't too far from that considering we execute people for being black on a regular basis

Charlie Don't Surf said:

the United States isn't too far from that considering we execute people for being black on a regular basis

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Damn, those gay, Jewish black guys better be careful!

SpecialKO said:

Damn, those gay, Jewish black guys better be careful!

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It's true, most of this forum holds a tremendous amount of privilege based on their race, religion, and sexual orientation

I think you've just spent too much time in Texas.

Again, Texas is weird.

SpecialKO said:

I think you've just spent too much time in Texas.

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Don't blame Texas for Charlie. Blame the Hipster genre growth of the early 2000s

Charlie Don't Surf said:

It's true, most of this forum holds a tremendous amount of privilege based on their race, religion, and sexual orientation

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FWIW, I'd rather have GB defend me than you. It's called diplomacy, man...

Bowielee said:

FWIW, I'd rather have GB defend me than you. It's called diplomacy, man...

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I don't think it's some accusation, it's just a fact of the world. There's nothing wrong with it, it doesn't make you a bad person. It's just a fact.

So... how about them religious freedoms?

If we are going to turn this thread into another vehicle for Charlie special snow flakiness, we should just lock it already.

Charlie believes that only he has the true unvarnished perspective of the truth.

The_Khan said:

So... how about them religious freedoms?

If we are going to turn this thread into another vehicle for Charlie special snow flakiness, we should just lock it already.

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SpecialKO said:

Charlie believes that only he has the true unvarnished perspective of the truth.

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And it's hilarious

What's even funnier is that I think a ton of us agree with Charlie on a lot of things - I certainly do.

I'm just not purer-than-thou about it.

SpecialKO said:

What's even funnier is that I think a ton of us agree with Charlie on a lot of things - I certainly do.

I'm just not purer-than-thou about it.

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This is actually my biggest issue with Charlie. He weakens our positions many times by lumping his crazy ass shit in with actually valid and well rationed out points.

If you're an asshole who's right, people aren't going to remember that you were right, they' re going to remember that you were an asshole.

Just sayin'.

Bowielee said:

If you're an asshole who's right, people aren't going to remember that you were right, they' re going to remember that you were an asshole.

Just sayin'.

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Unfortunately he's not right as often as you all are remembering unless you've forgotten his stance on our police force, our military and just about every other stance he has. It's not that he's trying to come off as right, it's he goes overboard.

It's not:
-There are a few corrupt cops but there are definitely more of the good ones.-

it's
-All cops are corrupt and evil, the entire country is a police state, better not be black or they'll hang you from the nearest tree.-

and it's only later when confronted by an actual member of the police force (from our own community)

he'll say:
-Oh there's a few good ones.-

Which in the end makes him so funny.

Charlie Don't Surf said:

It's true, most of this forum holds a tremendous amount of privilege based on their race, religion, and sexual orientation

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My race: Asian
My religion: None
My sexual orientation: Huge pervert

I can't tell if I count as a member of the privileged caste.

bhamv3 said:

My race: Asian
My religion: None
My sexual orientation: Huge pervert

I can't tell if I count as a member of the privileged caste.

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Easy. Are you Charlie? If the answer is no, then you are one of the evil ones.

Charlie Don't Surf said:

It's true, most of this forum holds a tremendous amount of privilege based on their race, religion, and sexual orientation

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I'm a minority where I live.
My Religion: None
My Sexual Orientation: Straight. What? I'm supposed to feel guilty about being straight too now?

My sister told him he was a dumbshit/wrong about everything all the time and she was all 3 minorities. I used to think he was one too till I realized the comedy of how he sees the world through his eyes. Then it just got sad/funny.

Oh and the best part? He's all 3 of the majority that's -wrong with society- right now. See? Comedy gold.

Charlie is just the white liberal mindset, taken to its logical endpoint and distilled for purity.

Says the Ron Paul ditto machine.

You know, there are times when I'm convinced Charlie is just GB wearing a different hat.

GasBandit said:

Charlie is just the white liberal mindset, taken to its logical endpoint and distilled for purity.

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he's a coffee partier?

I didn't know white guilt came in a K-cup.

Ian`t a coffee partier just a nice way of saying caffeine addict?

Krisken said:

Ian`t a coffee partier just a nice way of saying caffeine addict?

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He's some kind of dick, that's for sure

Krisken said:

Says the Ron Paul ditto machine.

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Whatever. Go touch a mountain, van driessen.

GasBandit said:

Whatever. Go touch a mountain, van driessen.

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I can't believe I had to look that up.

Just nuke the fuck out of Texas and take care of both problem children.

GasBandit said:

Whatever. Go touch a mountain, van driessen.

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I have no idea what that means and don't care enough to look it up. Next time find an insult I'll understand, Obscurous Insulticous.

Krisken said:

I have no idea what that means and don't care enough to look it up. Next time find an insult I'll understand, Obscurous Insulticous.

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That's ok. Somebody got it, and you didn't. That's like 2 chuckles for the price of one.

And any American over 25 really should get it without having to look for it.

I had to look it up because I couldn't remember what the name was. I did lol when I looked it up though, then recriminated myself for not remembering he was the teacher from Beavis and Butthead.

As to GB, he's not nearly as out of touch with reality as Charlie is. I disagree with his points, but at least he makes points rather than screaming like a howler monkey.

Bowielee said:

As to GB, he's not nearly as out of touch with reality as Charlie is. I disagree with his points, but at least he makes points rather than screaming like a howler monkey.

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What has been so out of touch with reality in this thread? Basically all I said was I oppose drone strikes/the US military in the middle east, the death penalty(and the racism within in the United States), and just pointed out white/male privilege exists.

edit: and disabled people's rights

I can't think of a single time you've actually suggested any solutions to the issues you bring up. You just ineffectually bitch about them. I'm going to go ahead and assume that you're as impotent about your activisim in your real life as you are here.

I may bitch about gay rights issues, but I'm doing something about it through community education and am actually persuing a degree that will help shed light on the reasons that people can be provoked to violent ends and how to avoid it. What exactly are you doing?

Bowielee said:

I can't think of a single time you've actually suggested any solutions to the issues you bring up. You just ineffectually bitch about them. I'm going to go ahead and assume that you're as impotent about your activisim in your real life as you are here.

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Firstly, this.
Secondly, Charlie, in defending right and good and noble causes, you very often fall into the trap of going towards the other extreme. Instead of trying to find a compromise, or trying to explain to someone why or how you think their reaction/view is wrong, you often posit things that are just as far out as what the "other side" is saying - and often just attack or defend yourself with "nuh-uh". You're ranting/yelling instead of convincing.
Some people here have actually made me change my mind on some matters, or at the very least re-evaluate my position. You never have - because if someone doesn't agree with you, you don't try to reason, you judge and condemn. Try asking the other side for why they feel the way they do. Instead of shouting, say, "all guns everywhere should always be banned for everyone", you might be better off saying "guns should be strictly regulated and only available to people after long and hard psychological tests and a 3 month waiting period, and even so, only for police and army and hunters have to store their guns at the police station" (or whatever). The first is, in actual fact, impossible and useless. The second is theoretically feasible, though unlikely (in the US). You'll never convince GasBandit, of course, but you might be able to sway someone like, say PatrThom, who does have guns and is in favour, but still open minded enough to debate how or why or what c an be done to keep the world safe.

Anyway, I'm going off course....Err, you're debating "to be right" instead of debating "to change minds". As long as you do, the "other side" will have an easy time ignoring you or mocking you, and the people on the fence will find you just as much a dogmatic idiot who won't even listen to the other side as Invader and either ignore you, mock you, or be actively pushed towards the other side by opposing you.

Bowielee said:

I can't think of a single time you've actually suggested any solutions to the issues you bring up.

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Abolish the death penalty, pull out all troops/drones from the Middle East, legalize drugs, police reform.

I didn't realize I had to report to you guys everything I do regarding each issue to be able to have an opinion

Charlie Don't Surf said:

Abolish the death penalty, pull out all troops/drones from the Middle East, legalize drugs, police reform.

I didn't realize I had to report to you guys everything I do regarding each issue to be able to have an opinion

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I can get behind all of these.

Charlie Don't Surf said:

I didn't realize I had to report to you guys everything I do regarding each issue to be able to have an opinion

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You don't do anything to help. You're the kind of person who if you did, would never stop mentioning it at every opportunity.

It's easy to say "police reform." That's not very descriptive of what is being reformed, or how it is accomplished.

GasBandit said:

It's easy to say "police reform." That's not very descriptive of what is being reformed, or how it is accomplished.

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Giving them powers like in Judge Dredd could be considered reform. We need specifics.

America is awesome. Screw you guys!

This is how I imagine Charlie at home:

Wife/gf/friend/Moshi- "Man this is some good weather"

Charlie - "you know small Africans are dying of aids in droves while we go and bomb brown people".



----

Also seriously STFU unless you are willing to actually do anything about it. You sit in your white collar job in a position of extreme priveledge complaining about how nobody does anything to fix the world while doin nothing to fix the world. Complaining is easy, anyone can do it. Doing something abou it is hard.

You want to do something? Go join the peace corps. A number of m friends have done it and it really does make a difference. Or, go work for a non profit. I did that for 3 years and it's an experience I would never give up. Or, make significant donations to charities of your choice. That money makes a real difference.

All of those things make a huge difference. Guess what doesn't? Being a sanctimonious blowhard on the Internet.

Edit: you know what, I'm being unfair. Perhaps you do these things already. Charlie, here is your chance to nut up or STFU. What do YOU do in your life to change the world? Remember, "Be the change you want to see in the world".

Charlie Don't Surf said:

Abolish the death penalty, pull out all troops/drones from the Middle East, legalize drugs, police reform.

I didn't realize I had to report to you guys everything I do regarding each issue to be able to have an opinion

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Doing all of those, just like that, without any extra measures, will result in:
1) More vigilante-killings
2) More instability in the ME, leading to scores more dead - most probably, without outside help, the revolution in Libya'd have failed and thatin Syria is having trouble even *with* help - you okay with letting thousands extra die and perhaps a decade or more of torment and oppression?
3) More problems like where does it come from, where does it go (...cotton-eye Joe?); funding terrorists, suddenly forgiving all former smugglers, what're you going to do?
4) Police reform by whom? The current bigwigs and top brass will just"reform" it to have more cronies and more nepotistically appointed fat cats, and don't give a hoot about how it'll affect things in the street.

That's still not "suggesting solutions" - that's chanting slogans. Both ways - "abolish gay marriage" is easy; it's hard to say how/where/what you'll do with those already married, for example.
There's a difference between "just do what I want in magical make belief country" and "this is a possible solution I can support and that can, over the next several years, help us accomplish this goal I think we should strive for".[DOUBLEPOST=1354907969][/DOUBLEPOST]

Ravenpoe said:

I can get behind all of these.

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For the record, so can I. I'm just saying those aren't serious/practical "solutions".

Good and noble causes? He white knighted OSAMA BIN LADEN, FFS.

Fuck you, Charlie. Just fuck you.

DarkAudit said:

Good and noble causes? He white knighted OSAMA BIN LADEN, FFS.

Fuck you, Charlie. Just fuck you.

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So? Human rights are human rights. If you believe all man are created equal under God, and all men have equal rights, than Bin Laden had the right to a fair trial and a hearing, which he didn't get. I mean, you'd have to import Martians to find someone who wouldn't find him guilty, probably, but that's besides the point. Even Evil Bastards have human rights.
Otherwise, you're allowing your own judgement to blind yourself. Who are you to judge Mother Theresa a better person than Osama Bin Laden? There are probably people out there who would disagree (and they'd be wrong, according to me, for the record!). Either the US government can take right into their own hands and assassinate inconvenient people, but than so can, say, China or Saudi-Arabia; or nobody has the "moral right" to decide who else gets to live or die without a trial.
Assuming your on moral superiority is something we all tend to do (myself most certainly included!), but it's technically wrong.
Mind you that I'm happy he's dead, and he didn't exactly deserve any leniency.

Necronic said:

This is how I imagine Charlie at home:

Wife/gf/friend/Moshi- "Man this is some good weather"

Charlie - "you know small Africans are dying of aids in droves while we go and bomb brown people".

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He has no significant other, but amusing scenario none the less.

Oh and he won't -nut up- and tell us what he does because:

1: It's sexist to say -nut up
2: He's not the kind of person to brag about his do-good charity work and social work to help push the forward the reform he tells us the world needs everyday.


We go through this nearly every time he posts his funny troll posts. He really does get a kick out of the predictable responses that follow.

GasBandit said:

It's easy to say "police reform." That's not very descriptive of what is being reformed, or how it is accomplished.

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Well the first step would be to completely nationalize it of course. This way we would only have to change one law enforcement agency instead of 50 state trooper departments and 3033 county sheriff offices, and the multiple local city Police Departments that work inside each of the counties. Now we only have 1 set of policies to worry about. Wait, no sorry. I forgot about the SBIs. We should probably just abolish those.

As for step two, a policy letter should be enough right? Or do you think we'll need quotas on white arrests to get them up to the level of black arrests?

To be fair, I wouldn't normally go after someone about that. People's charity work/donations is a private issue. The problem with Charlie is that, as far as I can tell, all he's sees in the world are problems and it's mostly OUR fault because we dont have the right priorities (which he is here to enlighten us on.). What he does is actually far worse than just saying "nut up or STFU", he flat out assumes we do nothing and don't give a shit, which I find deeply offensive.

So yeah, here's the gauntlet. What do you ACTUALLY do to change the world, beyond telling us how WE should fix it?

GasBandit said:

That's ok. Somebody got it, and you didn't. That's like 2 chuckles for the price of one.

And any American over 25 really should get it without having to look for it.

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Ok, now that I get the joke reference, does that make you Beavis?

And now we've entered the "Charlie won't respond" portion of the thread.

He'll be back, with more random, liberal versions of "What about the children" type tropes to rain on the parade of anyone who thinks America should be praised for anything they do right.

so I take it from his lack of response, charlies answer to the suffering in the world, is vigorous masturbation.

Damn, right when I thought he would not come up with a viable solution.

Well-played, Charlie.

Which just begets more suffering. It's a vicious masturbation cycle.

Krisken said:

Which just begets more suffering. It's a vicious masturbation cycle.

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Lol wat? You have no idea what you're talking about man. Masturbation is awesome.

bhamv3 said:

Lol wat? You have no idea what you're talking about man. Masturbation is awesome.

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I imagine Charlie masturbation involves weeping and shame.

Krisken said:

I imagine Charlie masturbation involves weeping and shame.

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Weeping and shame notwithstanding, masturbation is still awesome. No exceptions.

*insert "humph" emoticon we used to have here*

Given the empirical evidence, it is hard to argue against.

SPANKING MONKEYS IS CRUELTY TO ANIMALS!

Not when they've been bad, bad monkeys that owe you money.