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It's the Chad Sexington Narcissism Spectacular

Aug 22, 2016#1

Chad Sexington

You know who's amazing? It's me. I feel that you all could use a reminder of just how to write a brilliant forum post. For that reason, and also the glorification of my incredible ego, I have decided to take you all on a little walk through some of my greatest hits.

The criteria by which I selected these posts:

It has to have had at least one rating, of any kind
It has to have made me laugh upon re-reading.

I have broken them into two lists: Funny things I said, and an actual countdown of the best ones.

Not In Any Order, But Pretty Good

Emrys' life is governed by a single meeting in which forces are arrayed against her
Bubble validates our lives
Kags is going to die awkwardly
I made it very inconvenient for my friend to drink pop
I really just think the idea of Tom Mulcair's beard talking on its own is pretty funny
Lame joke I love (you gotta scroll up for context. What am I. Your servant?)
I GOT GASBANDIT FUCK YEAH (also scroll up for context.)
The Gonk washing windows
What is it with you people and teeth?
I have a very specific image of Jesse Eisenberg
That stienman sure has a lot of kids.
"I didn't come here for second place." NO ONE DID

In Order. The Best of the Best

10: Come on, man
9: I once saw a chinchilla masturbate
8: Fade doesn't like things
7: Making out with an owl
6: Benefits to a vagina
5: Sosme devunt I think more ling but
4: Biting political commentary
3: I drink a lot
2: Biting political commentary part deux
And the number 1 best post ever is actually two posts, but also sort of not:
1: Victory and Defeat

Here are a couple of things that didn't meet one or the other criteria, but are good, and you should read them also.

Other People's Posts

The Poignant Posts

Aug 22, 2016#2

MindDetective

Never stop!

Aug 22, 2016#3

Dave

That N_R one gets me every time.

Aug 23, 2016#4

Bubble181

A) hurray! I made the list! Like, thrice, if you squint.
B) man, you really liked it here around 2013-14 huh?
C) we need more Chad in here!
D) I am, like, 75% sure I rated some of those conversations. And then now I found out apparently I didn't? Guys, I've been giving less ratings than I thought/intended!

Aug 23, 2016#5

HCGLNS

Holy shit! I always thought Chad was Adams alt!

Aug 23, 2016#6

Chad Sexington

Bubble181 said:
B) man, you really liked it here around 2013-14 huh?

I started making this project a while ago, like, before a forum update, and lost some of the earlier links. I didn't have the wherewithal to go through them all again. Maybe a sequel edition sometime. And 14-16 I feel I haven't been active/particularly witty I suppose.

Bubble181 said:
C) we need more Chad in here!

Well, obviously.

HCGLNS said:
Holy shit! I always thought Chad was Adams alt!

Nope! I am a real, distinct person, who definitely exists independently.

Aug 23, 2016#7

Cog

Hey! I'm there also! I'm a part of here isn't?

Aug 23, 2016#8

HCGLNS

Chad Sexington said:
Nope! I am a real, distinct person, who definitely exists independently.

That's going to cause a bit of confusion. Mind if we call you Adams Alt to keep it clear?

Aug 23, 2016#9

DarkAudit

HCGLNS said:
That's going to cause a bit of confusion. Mind if we call you JCM Alt to keep it clear?

FTFY

Aug 23, 2016#10

Bubble181

HCGLNS said:
That's going to cause a bit of confusion. Mind if we call you Adams Alt to keep it clear?

While they're both sexy shoe less gods of war and whiskey, one's aware of it and thus happily married to a babe, and the other needs occasional reminders.

Aug 23, 2016#11

Chad Sexington

HCGLNS said:
That's going to cause a bit of confusion. Mind if we call you Adams Alt to keep it clear?

What part of Narcissism Spectacular are you not getting?[DOUBLEPOST=1471978655,1471978622][/DOUBLEPOST]

Bubble181 said:
While they're both sexy shoe less gods of war and whiskey, one's aware of it and thus happily married to a babe, and the other needs occasional reminders.

Shoeless?

Aug 23, 2016#12

Bubble181

Chad Sexington said:
What part of Narcissism Spectacular are you not getting?[DOUBLEPOST=1471978655,1471978622][/DOUBLEPOST]
Shoeless?

It's an Order of the Stick reference. Just assume it means you're a sexy as hell.

Aug 23, 2016#13

Dave

He's calling you a murderous halfling.

Aug 23, 2016#14

phil

If I was in a room with Chad, Hitler and Bin-Ladin and I had a gun with two bullets I would let Chad shoot me twice.

Because it is secretly a friendship gun with friendship bullets. Bin-Ladin and Hitler would feel so left out.[DOUBLEPOST=1471983250,1471983070][/DOUBLEPOST]If Chad were a Star Trek series he'd be Deep Space 9, because while it's not the best Trek, of all the series it's the best and most accessible television series.[DOUBLEPOST=1471983428][/DOUBLEPOST]If Chad were a pizza he'd be a The Works pizza because he has something for everyone!

Aug 23, 2016#15

Gruebeard

phil said:
If Chad were a Star Trek series he'd be Deep Space 9, because while it's not the best Trek, of all the series it's the best and most accessible television series.

See, when I read "Deep Space 9" I thought you were making a sexy joke. I am disappointed in you. Why can't you be as prefect as Chad?

Aug 23, 2016#16

phil

Gruebeard said:
See, when I read "Deep Space 9" I thought you were making a sexy joke.

I would never joke about DS:9. We lost a lot of good people in that series.

I am disappointed in you. Why can't you be as prefect as Chad?

WELL IF YOU LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHY DON'T YOU MARRY HIM?!

*cries and runs out*

Aug 23, 2016#17

Gruebeard

phil said:
WELL IF YOU LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHY DON'T YOU MARRY HIM?!

*cries and runs out*

Gay marriage may be legal for us, but there's still no bromarriage. Otherwise I'd have proposed to him long ago.

Aug 23, 2016#18

Cheesy1

There's only ONE way to settle this:

DANCE OFF!!!

Sep 2, 2016#19

PatrThom

I never realized how much that looks like a casting call for Blue Man Group.

--Patrick

Sep 2, 2016#20

IronBrig4

Cheesy1 said:
There's only ONE way to settle this:

DANCE OFF!!

Sep 2, 2016#21

Adam

HCGLNS said:
Holy shit! I always thought Chad was Adams alt!

It's strange; usually I'd be thought of as the alt![DOUBLEPOST=1472848671,1472848482][/DOUBLEPOST]

HCGLNS said:
Holy shit! I always thought Chad was Adams alt!

Also, I am a real, distinct person, who definitely exists independently.

Sep 2, 2016#22

HCGLNS

Adam said:
Also, I am a real, distinct person, who definitely exists independently.

But but but you "live" "West of Toronto"!

We're gonna need some proof of life.

Sep 12, 2016#23

phil

You know who real as fuck? Real AF as the kids say?

Chad "yeah that one" Sexington.

Sep 12, 2016#24

General Specific

Cheesy1 said:
There's only ONE way to settle this:

DANCE OFF!!!

Sep 12, 2016#25

HCGLNS

I dunno have we forgiven Chad over the sideburns scandal?

Sep 12, 2016#26

phil

Chad shot my father in Reno just to watch him die and I still forgave him.

also re:dace off

Sep 12, 2016#27

MindDetective

@Chad Sexington betrayed me on our last mission in North Korea. After I escaped, I still forgave him.

Sep 12, 2016#28

HCGLNS

Chad had sex with my cactus, and I forgave him.

Sep 12, 2016#29

Simfers

I was that cactus and I still pine for Chad.

Sep 12, 2016#30

Emrys

Chad Sexington is awesomesauce!

Sep 12, 2016#31

HCGLNS

Emrys said:
Chad Sexington is awesomesauce!

Hey the two of you are from the same area! You're speaking from experience!!!!!

Get the Maroon Letter!

Sep 12, 2016#32

Chad Sexington

Stroking my ego will get you everywhere.

Sep 12, 2016#33

N

Nebulous

Sep 12, 2016#34

Chad Sexington

Nebulous said:
View attachment 22070

When you're as good at narcissism as I am, you can multitask.

Sep 13, 2016#35

N

Nebulous

Chad Sexington said:
When you're as good at narcissism as I am, you can multitask.

I'll bet you can do all these things at once:

...Just kidding

Sep 13, 2016#36

Chad Sexington

Nebulous said:
I'll bet you can do all these things at once:

View attachment 22075
...Just kidding

Checks out.

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