RANT IV - A New Angst

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B

Batdan

My gf has been having problems with her parents for years and tonight when I came over to her house she was in tears again. Apparently she was visiting her sister today at her parent's house when her mom decides to have a fit because she's there. My gf and her sister decided to leave for lunch and to go shopping to calm the situation. Halfway through shopping her dad calls and tells her that her car will be towed if not moved from their driveway in half an hour. Fortunately my gf got to her car in time and was able to get home alright. How much of an asshole do you have to be when you hate your kids so much that you would be willing to tow their car from your driveway because they want to spend time with a sibling? This is the final straw in a line of things that her parents have done to her over her life. Gah, it makes me so mad because she's such a sweet and intelligent girl who doesn't deserve any of this.

Luckily I was able to calm her down and reassure her, but I've never been so glad that I grew up with loving parents who actually care for their kids rather than resenting them.
 
Wow Dan, those people suck.

Honestly, how hard is it to at least be civil? Especially to your own kids?

Some people are such selfish pricks. :devil:
 
Damn you, Halforum!

I was reading through the threads for the first time since I got addicted to Evony, and now the sun is rising :angry:
 
I'm so tempted to start a thread about this, but I've been pioneering a lot of dumb threads lately, so I'll just shuff it here.

In the past two years, I've taught myself to like tea and coffee. In recent weeks, I've been eying more 'adult' things, chief among them cigars.

I've never smoked anything in my life. Not cigarettes, not anything. The closest I've come is walking into my smoking uncle's house, and catching a whiff of the smoke clinging to everything in the house.

Anyhow. I read up a bit, and kept seeing recommended Montecristo No. 4's as a good beginner cigar. So yesterday, after I got paid, I went to a smoke shop and picked up everything I'd need. Wooden matches, a cigar cutter, and a Montecristo No. 4.

I just smoked it an hour ago. I don't live in a smoker friendly house, and bars here don't allow smoking at all, so I did so outside. There was a bit of a breeze, so trying to light it was a nightmare. It didn't burn evenly, and I didn't get to smoke the whole thing. But I'm not too disappointed: I expected as much for a first time, and with nobody knowledgeable to teach me.

I can't say I loved it, but it was okay. I certainly liked it more than I liked coffee on my first go.

Speaking of coffee, the cigar tasted almost like it. More like a coffee aftertaste, plus the smell of fresh ground coffee beans. It reminded me when I was a child, going to the supermarket with my mother. I used to love to walk by the fresh coffee for the aroma of it. The cigar had almost that flavor, but a bit harsher. I wish I had a dialect that would let me talk about it more, because 'coffee' is really all I can say about it. But I suppose building a vocabulary for these things is something that happens gradually with experience.

Anyhow. It was an interesting first time. I'll admit that I'm tempted to buy another soon, but it was expensive, and I don't have the kind of money to smoke regularly. Besides, I really don't want to be fooling around too much when it comes to nicotine.

The only thing is ... it gave me a headache. Of course, I had always been told that tobacco can do that to you, but I had forgotten. Am I correct in assuming that that's the sort of thing that goes away in time?

As for acquiring new tastes ... in the next few months, I'll be moving on to alcohol. I'll definitely be posting a new topic when it comes time to get down to business with that.

And yeah, I'm not sure where I was when my high school friends were experimenting with this stuff. I like to think I was a bit beyond their maturity level, and I'm glad that I didn't do this sort of thing years ago with them, what with the smoking until they threw up, getting so drunk they needed their stomachs pumped, and being arrested for toking up in a public park. But that said, it is a little embarrassing to be such a late bloomer.
 
i would definitely avoid taking the habit of smoking if i were you.

it's bad for you, cigars included

this is coming from someone who's been smoking for 15+ years
 
M

Mr_Chaz

Yeah I've got to ask, what makes you want to take up cigar smoking? With all the very well documented health effects it seems like a very strange choice to make. It almost sounds like you only want to start to make yourself look more adult...yet you also describe yourself as mature, so why do you want to look more adult?

I can understand someone who smokes not giving up, but I really can't understand why someone would start smoking in the first place, especially as such a specific goal as yours seems to be.
 
Well, smoking cigars is pretty badass. Except it carries health problems... But if I could afford expensive cuban cigars, I may smoke one or two on special occasions!
 
I brought some Cubans back with me from vacation, and I smoke one occasionally. Smoking an entire cigar kinda makes me light headed but it's pretty enjoyable overall.
 
Math242 said:
i would definitely avoid taking the habit of smoking if i were you.

it's bad for you, cigars included

this is coming from someone who's been smoking for 15+ years
Mr_Chaz said:
Yeah I've got to ask, what makes you want to take up cigar smoking? With all the very well documented health effects it seems like a very strange choice to make. It almost sounds like you only want to start to make yourself look more adult...yet you also describe yourself as mature, so why do you want to look more adult?

I can understand someone who smokes not giving up, but I really can't understand why someone would start smoking in the first place, especially as such a specific goal as yours seems to be.
To be fair, I don't intend on taking up the 'habit.' Although I'm sure many chain smokers said that to begin with too. Much like taking up coffee, it's just something I would like to be able to do: smoke a cigar or something else without throwing up during a puff.

Any real reason I give is probably going to sound empty, but it's something I've been considering for a while now, and I made the decision to 'acclimatize' myself to smoking several months ago. I just haven't gotten around to it until very recently. But here are the reasons I can sort of verbalize appropriately.

It's part fatalism: realizing that in this day, nearly everything I do has been found to pose a threat to my health in some way, and saying to 'hell with it' to any health risk that smoking might bring. Looking at my family history, it's more likely that heart disease will do me in far before I suffer any repacussions from smoking. Especially if I only intend to smoke a dozen or so times a year.

It's part societal: smoking is just something people used to do, and though they didn't know the risks, I feel like it's worth giving the old ways a nod here and again. Same reason I've resisted buying an electric razor in lieu of wet shaving.

It's part social: I've been travelling more and more recently where a social smoke might be something that happens, and while I'm sure any respectable person would understand any choice I make not to, I'd like the ability to choose between having a smoke and not without having the decision made for me by the fact that I can't confidently smoke anyhow.

And yeah, I'll admit: it's part image as well. I mean, they were right in high school: the kids wearing windbreakers and dirty baseball caps sucking on a cigarette in blowing wind and snow certainly didn't look cool. But trade the windbreaker and hat for a good shirt and jacket, the cigarette for a pipe or a cigar, and the weather-assaulted parking lot for a leather couch in a smoking room, and you look awesome.
 
I hate that because I am single I am required to fucking take on new room mates even though I have the smallest house of the Force housing by a God damn mile. Fucking bullshit. I'm not the least senior of the constables at all but still I keep ending up being the guy who has to take in the new people. Fucking bullshit.

Fucking fucks using my stuff.
 
:Leyla:

My landlord asked me if I could tidy up my room a bit, since he's going to be trying to sell the house in a little bit. I said it was no problem, since it needed cleaning anyways.

Anyhow. I'm half done, and my desk is not usable at the moment, so I turned my little chair 180 degrees to use the boxes behind me as a makeshift desk for my laptop.

I sat down, and noticed that my chair is slanted to the left. I hadn't noticed that before. I got curious, so I had a look at the chair ... nothing wrong with it. I pondered, and pondered, and then turned my chair back to the original position, and sat down in it. Feels normal.

I had an inkling as to the problem, and as another experiment, I laid down in my bed with my head where the foot normally is. It felt uncomfortable, like my feet were above my head.

As a last experiment to confirm it, I took a roll of tape and put it at one end of my room. It rolled unhindered to the other wall.

I have been living in this place for 8 months now, and I am JUST noticing that the entire room is slanted.

:Leyla:
 
Apparantly the Mac Mini I got open box on clearance? Whoever bought and returned it not only took the iLife '09 disc and the remote, but also used the serial number to get the next OS X upgrade.

I just don't understand the mentality of people who believe it's ok to buy something, take what they want, and return it to the store. I was willing to give up the other parts, but now I'm essentially out $160 if I want to buy Snow Leopard, and chances are good that eventually I'm going to have to so I can keep developing software on it.

:explode:

-Adam
 
A few weeks ago I had been told that I had lost 20 pounds and I was pretty proud of that... I had been dieting for over a year now and I had given up almost all of my favorite things. I had cut down on portion sizes, started eating vegan 3-5 times a week, gave up regular soda, gave up fast food all but once every 1-2 weeks... the whole works and I'd manage to keep to it for a whole year. So I go back to the Doctor's yesterday, as I still had a nasty cough from my bronchitis a few weeks ago, and I notice they've replaced their scale. It turns out the old scale had been broken for quite some time and they just hadn't bothered to replace it until now. So they re-weigh me... according to the new scale, I had actually gained 15 pounds.

I know I'm fighting against biology here, as almost everyone in my family is REALLY, REALLY big, but I thought if I tried hard enough I could at least lost some of the weight I'd gained since I started having anxiety issues. But now I don't know what to think... was it all an exercise in futility? Am I always destined to be heavy unless I do something drastic like my cousin and get surgery? After all of the bullshit I've had to endure lately because of the people in my life and my mental problems, I really needed something to go right for once... I honestly needed the confidence boost. I needed a reason to keep trying.

This also doesn't take into account the fact that the old scale may have been broken when they originally weighed me before I had started trying to lose weight. I may have simply been heavier than I had been told and I HAD been losing weight. But in the end it doesn't matter... my confidence in myself has been shaken yet again and I don't know if I have the energy to keep fighting these uphill battles.
 

Cajungal

Staff member
That sucks, Ash... similar experience here, so I feel ya.

Weight is only part of it, though. Have you noticed changes in your body? Do you feel better physically? If so, it might not be as bad as you think. Like you said before, scales lie sometimes.

Don't give up, but if being heavy runs in your family, definitely talk to your doctor. What you've done already to help yourself are all great steps, but he/she might be able to help you along. Don't lose heart! You can do it! Anxiety doesn't exactly help the weight loss process, so try and put yourself in a calm place any way you can. Rooting for you. :)
 
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I'm sorry. I'll try that again.

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No, it's a kickliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.

*hugs Allen*
 
I had a day-long argument on Monday with my best friend, and at the end of it I told him to go fuck himself. It was at that point I realized who the real asshole was in the situation (Hint: It's me) and felt like shit, and finally apologized.

But I still feel like shit about it. I'm a real bastard sometimes.

So now I'm ranting. /rant.
 
It's hard to talk to her because it reminds me of how awesome being with her would be. I never thought I'd want to be a Mormon (not that there's anything wrong with being one, obviously).
 
Garbledina said:
I had a day-long argument on Monday with my best friend, and at the end of it I told him to go fuck himself. It was at that point I realized who the real asshole was in the situation (Hint: It's me) and felt like shit, and finally apologized.

But I still feel like shit about it. I'm a real bastard sometimes.

So now I'm ranting. /rant.
I hate when that happens. I won't pretend it happens frequently, but when it happens, I begin to utterly loathe myself.

Last time something like this happened to me was a few months back. I was opining that the Twilight books were trash for putting forward a horribly unrealistic romantic worldview. I wasn't arguing that Twilight was unique in this, but it's popularity made it a prime example. My friend said that she saw Twilight as in the same vein as Harry Potter. I declared quite loudly that Harry Potter was trash too.

I'm not sure why I did that. I don't have near the same issues with the Harry Potter books that I do with the Twilight ones. In fact, I quite like Harry Potter.

And then I felt like a dick.
 
B

Batdan

CynicismKills said:
It's hard to talk to her because it reminds me of how awesome being with her would be. I never thought I'd want to be a Mormon (not that there's anything wrong with being one, obviously).
I hear you CK. I'm thinking about moving in with my gf here in the next few months (if we can find a cheap rent house). Although I wouldn't have to join a religion, we would have to deal with her family. I really do think we would make a good married couple. After we elope of course. We both believe there's no reason to stir up the drama with a big wedding fiasco when the time comes.
 
About two years ago, right after returning from the military, one of my best friends, Scott, started dating a girl. I was really happy for him, since he'd had a horrible string of girls before his current one (his previous girlfriend being the only girl I have ever completely gone off on...but that's another story). He obviously cares about her, and--though she's a bit shy and doesn't seem to really like hanging out around us, despite attempts to make her feel welcome--I didn't begrudge him that.

Fast forward a year, and he slowly stopped hanging out with us. He says he got busy with work, and he's working forty hours a week and having to take care of the puppies he had. I understand, and put up with it for a long while; but every time I call, he's with his girlfriend and says that he never has time for anything (apparently I was the last guy he hung out with...two months ago). He never calls when he's free, never makes any effort to keep in touch, and I've gotten fucking sick of it. I talked to him about it a couple weeks ago, and his response was,
"Well...want to go hiking Monday?"
"I have school all day on Monday."
"Oh.....okay."

It sucks, because he is (or at least was) one of my best friends, but I'm fed up with being constantly ignored and am strongly considering just cutting him off and seeing if he ever tries to contact us again.
 
Batdan said:
CynicismKills said:
It's hard to talk to her because it reminds me of how awesome being with her would be. I never thought I'd want to be a Mormon (not that there's anything wrong with being one, obviously).
I hear you CK. I'm thinking about moving in with my gf here in the next few months (if we can find a cheap rent house). Although I wouldn't have to join a religion, we would have to deal with her family. I really do think we would make a good married couple. After we elope of course. We both believe there's no reason to stir up the drama with a big wedding fiasco when the time comes.
Yeah, the problem here is she wants to marry another Mormon, big temple wedding and all that. I don't blame her, it's important to her. Doesn't mean it's any easier for me, though.

Edit to add: This also isn't to say I'm ready to marry her or anything. More that it's not like a relationship makes sense when there's no way it can go anywhere.
 
M

Mr_Chaz

Enresshou said:
About two years ago, right after returning from the military, one of my best friends, Scott, started dating a girl. I was really happy for him, since he'd had a horrible string of girls before his current one (his previous girlfriend being the only girl I have ever completely gone off on...but that's another story). He obviously cares about her, and--though she's a bit shy and doesn't seem to really like hanging out around us, despite attempts to make her feel welcome--I didn't begrudge him that.

Fast forward a year, and he slowly stopped hanging out with us. He says he got busy with work, and he's working forty hours a week and having to take care of the puppies he had. I understand, and put up with it for a long while; but every time I call, he's with his girlfriend and says that he never has time for anything (apparently I was the last guy he hung out with...two months ago). He never calls when he's free, never makes any effort to keep in touch, and I've gotten fucking sick of it. I talked to him about it a couple weeks ago, and his response was,
"Well...want to go hiking Monday?"
"I have school all day on Monday."
"Oh.....okay."

It sucks, because he is (or at least was) one of my best friends, but I'm fed up with being constantly ignored and am strongly considering just cutting him off and seeing if he ever tries to contact us again.
You might want to be careful here though, it's upsetting that he isn't trying to make time with you, but if you stop trying too you could easily end up never seeing him again. Is his laziness worth that risk?
 
B

Batdan

CynicismKills said:
Yeah, the problem here is she wants to marry another Mormon, big temple wedding and all that. I don't blame her, it's important to her. Doesn't mean it's any easier for me, though.

Edit to add: This also isn't to say I'm ready to marry her or anything. More that it's not like a relationship makes sense when there's no way it can go anywhere.
On the bright side, I hear hear they have quite an astounding Tabernacle Choir.
 
Vasectomy. Leads the charts in all forms of birth control except for abstinence. Between 1 and 4 out of 1000 vasectomies don't "take" (ie regrow) in the first year. If it doesn't happen in the first year then the odds drop significantly for ever year after that. In addition to all of this, between 50 - 80 percent of men develop an immunity to their own sperm and if their vas do grow back they shoot blanks anyhow.

I had a vasectomy over 5 years ago. Have been tested yearly (up until this year) to make sure that I've still got no swimmers.

The girlfriend is usually a very regular person when it comes to her monthy event. Never late, never misses, like clockwork.

.... she is currently a week late.
 

I've had one, too. But if my wife got pregnant (and I knew it was mine) I wouldn't be all that upset.

Now, the first thing I'd do is make sure I have no swimmers.
 
That's the first thing I'm working on. Test has to wait until next week but ya, thats the first thing to check out.

One thing is, this is not a wife we are talking about getting pregnant. This is a girlfriend. We've only been seeing each other for about two months. I'm not saying we are/aren't going to be a long term thing, but I am saying it's way to early to have even considered that.
 
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