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Six Word Stories

#1

GasBandit

GasBandit

There was a post on Imgur today about 6 word stories. True to Hemingway's original ("For Sale. Baby shoes. Never worn.") they were all depressing or disturbing. Examples -

"Dad left. A flag came back."
"It's our fiftieth. Table for one."
"Ever seen chalk outlines that small?"
"Just Married, read the shattered windshield."
"I met my soulmate. She didn't."
"Introduced myself to mother again today."
"The smallest coffins are the heaviest."
"Brought roses home. Keys didn't fit."
"Goodbye, Mission Control. Thanks for trying."

There were one or two that were more thought provoking, like:

"Voyager still transmitted. The Earth didn't."
"I just saw my reflection blink."

But still pretty dour stuff.

So I chimed in with some of my own I came up with on the fly:

"Hold my beer and watch this!"
"But, ma'am, that isn't my rutabaga."
"I can't stop painting this duck!"
"CTRL Z! ESC! ESC! ALT F4!"

Somebody else even spoiled The Big Lebowski with his:
"Bunny wasn't kidnapped. The dude abides."

And of course, the inevitable -
"Shreck is love. Shreck is life."

You got some? They can be morose or silly or whatever.


#2

bhamv3

bhamv3

My mother taught me to shave.


#3

AshburnerX

AshburnerX

Please don't make me like you.


#4

Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

Is that a train, or flashlight?


#5

Celt Z

Celt Z

He didn't get the breaks fixed.


#6

GasBandit

GasBandit

It itches the more I scratch.


#7

Hylian

Hylian

I told you I wasn't faking


#8

Piotyr

Piotyr

One year later. Mom's still gone.


#9

Dave

Dave

Car broke down, no job today.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk


#10

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

He is a very fat haberdasher.


#11

PatrThom

PatrThom

That threddit game comes around again from time to time.
I'll try a handful.

"Banned! Lacking cats, Imgur closed down."
"Cinderella seeks Prince. Shoe not required."
"When y'all finish, burn those sheets."
"Another molasses flood? What're the odds?"
"NY to LA in twenty minutes!"
"Honey? Why're you wearing my underwear?"
"Went back in time. Too far."
"Nothing can harm him!/Except this!"
"Best Friends! Except during hockey season."
"Exchange rate: three deaths per resurrection."
"We share everything. Yes, even him."
"Farting is an art. Try harder!"
"Fridge was empty. Bed* wasn't. Yummy!"
"Why complain? You have four left."
"I'm infected? Just kill me, already."
"His dog's smarter'n both of 'em."
"Broken leg? Broken ribs? Decisions, decisions..."
"Tears of joy...are still tears."
"Craigslist hitman. It pays the bills."
"Dad's home early. Don't tell mom."
"Hand soap. Made from real hands!"
"Perfect! Now hold that pose...forever."
"Blockbuster Video: Back From The Brink!"

--Patrick
*You can substitute "crib" if you want to max out the creepy.


#12

WasabiPoptart

WasabiPoptart

Don't make me stop this car!


#13

Cheesy1

Cheesy1

My memories are nothing but regrets.


#14

PatrThom

PatrThom

Cheesy1 said:
My memories are nothing but regrets.
Click to expand...
I regret only my newest memories.

--Patrick


#15

Just Me

Just Me

Dave said:
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
Click to expand...
Good one!:)


This concept looks funny to me.


#16

strawman

strawman

Profound insight, just seconds too late.


#17

strawman

strawman

Fall together, fall alone, rending decision.


#18

Charlie Don't Surf

Charlie Don't Surf

The end was only the beginning.


#19

Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

No parachute? No problem. Watch this!


#20

PatrThom

PatrThom

Zero Esc said:
No parachute? No problem. Watch this!
Click to expand...
@Docseverin is cockier than usual today.

--Patrick


#21

Terrik

Terrik

This one time, at band camp. .

?


#22

Just Me

Just Me

Terrik said:
This one time, at band camp. .

?
Click to expand...
One time.
Band camp.
Dafuq?
Profit!


#23

Zappit

Zappit

I heard my voice drawing near.
He disappeared with the donor organs.
Sold the trampoline. Bought a wheelchair.


#24

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

I can't believe she said yes!


#25

Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

I can't believe it's not butter!


#26

GasBandit

GasBandit

Ravenpoe said:
I can't believe it's not butter!
Click to expand...
Oh my god it's not butter!


#27

PatrThom

PatrThom

Six words, endless possibilities to explore.

--Patrick


#28

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

The cheese is green? LET'S EAT!


#29

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

Hold my beer and watch this.


#30

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

Is skin supposed to fall off?


#31

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

I was just following my orders.


#32

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

I will not take that excuse.


#33

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

Judgment is passed. Prepare for execution.


#34

Just Me

Just Me

What is this, I can't even.


#35

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Monday.
Six beer for me! We share!
Hobo smiles are better with cheese.


#36

Officer_Charon

Officer_Charon

Freedom comes at a dear price.
Fathers should never abandon their kids.
When easy, get taken advantage of.
Paperwork; that one true inevitable constant.
Headlong we drove. One illuminated, one...
"You'll never take me alive!" Aneurysm.


#37

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

Don't worry, he has good days.


#38

GasBandit

GasBandit

Doctor, I can't find my head.


#39

WasabiPoptart

WasabiPoptart

It's coming closer! Oh God NO!


#40

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

And now ladies and gentlemen, Carrottop!


#41

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

Just one bad day is all.


#42

CrimsonSoul

CrimsonSoul

Just had sex, felt so good
Not going back to no sex


#43

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Oops.


#44

Officer_Charon

Officer_Charon

For once, I didn't catch crabs!


#45

PatrThom

PatrThom

Officer_Charon said:
For once, I didn't catch crabs!
Click to expand...
In Soviet Russia, crabs catch you!

--Patrick


#46

Officer_Charon

Officer_Charon

PatrThom said:
In Soviet Russia, crabs catch you!

--Patrick
Click to expand...
Kremlin crabs can cause colon cancer.


#47

jwhouk

jwhouk

V one. V two. Damn it.

(Points if anyone knows the reference.)


#48

GasBandit

GasBandit

HCGLNS said:
And now ladies and gentlemen, Carrottop!
Click to expand...
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Too far, man, too far!


#49

Emrys

Emrys

Officer_Charon said:
For once, I didn't catch crabs!
Click to expand...
This one made me spit milk at my monitor.


#50

WasabiPoptart

WasabiPoptart

Start. Grow. Learn. Love. Create. Fin.


#51

Enresshou

Enresshou

No head. How do you sing?

But within there was nothing.


#52

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

@Squidleybits watching porn for the plot.


#53

jwhouk

jwhouk

And then, the doom weasels dined.


#54

Squidleybits

Squidleybits

HCGLNS said:
@Squidleybits watching porn for the plot.
Click to expand...
Well, the dude was too gross.


#55

Terrik

Terrik

Dexter, what does that button do?


#56

PatrThom

PatrThom

Terrik said:
Dexter, what does that button do?
Click to expand...
I must prepare for Dee-Dee's return.

--Patrick


#57

Officer_Charon

Officer_Charon

PatrThom said:
I must prepare for Dee-Dee's return.

--Patrick
Click to expand...
Wrong Dexter. A circular saw starts.


#58

Null

Null

Blood spatter enlivens the stark walls.


#59

Just Me

Just Me

Never gonna give you up! *gotcha*


#60

Emrys

Emrys

Rick-roller chopped. Film at eleven.


#61

Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

Emrys said:
This one made me spit milk at my monitor.
Click to expand...
And she wasn't even drinking milk!


#62

PatrThom

PatrThom

Officer_Charon said:
Wrong Dexter. A circular saw starts.
Click to expand...
They were the same all along!

--Patrick


#63

Null

Null

Ravenpoe said:
And she wasn't even drinking milk!
Click to expand...
Depending on your definition of "milk"


#64

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

And now, gentlemen, we become Gods!


#65

General Specific

General Specific

I can still hear her voice.


#66

Null

Null

I can't remember what she said.


#67

PatrThom

PatrThom

Should have bought the extended warranty!

--Patrick


#68

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

With great power comes great responsibility.


#69

Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

You laced the condom with what?


#70

PatrThom

PatrThom

Words, carefully chosen, can still fail.

--Patrick


#71

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

Say the magic word, Billy Batson.


#72

fade

fade

The voice whispered under the bed.[DOUBLEPOST=1410724184,1410724050][/DOUBLEPOST]Incoming missle trails are quite beautiful.


#73

Squidleybits

Squidleybits

Don't worry, nothing broke in here!


#74

Squidleybits

Squidleybits

Our son likes big brown beaver!


#75

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

I will fight that sea turtle!


#76

strawman

strawman

Mabel calmed me with hot chocolate.


#77

Squidleybits

Squidleybits

Had hives start in a greater rift :(


#78

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

@Shegokigo, lead singer of No Limit.

Fuck brah, do you even doomweasel?


#79

Emrys

Emrys

The Scampering begins. God have mercy.


#80

Cheesy1

Cheesy1

I welcome our new weasel overlords.


#81

fade

fade

"I farted," said Elizabeth, England's queen.


#82

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

How could anyone love a beast?


#83

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

How do you viciously penis someone?


#84

Cheesy1

Cheesy1

Yoshimickster said:
How do you viciously penis someone?
Click to expand...
Allow these upstanding citizens to demonstrate:


#85

Timmus

Timmus

Dave said:
Car broke down, no job today.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
Click to expand...

Two stories one post, funny right?


#86

WasabiPoptart

WasabiPoptart

Five pages to go. This sucks.


#87

Dave

Dave

I'm afloat as the ship sinks.


#88

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

I told you, he's a spider!


#89

Dave

Dave

A bird! A plane? ...A BOMB?!?


#90

Dave

Dave

Don't point that! It might be-


#91

rac3r_x

rac3r_x

The thief hid in the alley...


#92

Cheesy1

Cheesy1

I'm sexy and I know it!
farley dance.gif


#93

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

I gotta have more cow bell!


#94

GasBandit

GasBandit

Yoshimickster said:
I told you, he's a spider!
Click to expand...
He's a chicken! A GIANT CHICKEN!



#95

bhamv3

bhamv3

The cold never bothered me anyway.

BONUS STORY: It's now stuck in your head!


#96

Frank

Frank

A horrible night for a curse.


#97

rac3r_x

rac3r_x

It was a trick question, again.


#98

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

I thought you said we're alone?


#99

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

Do you like gladiator movies Billy?


#100

fade

fade

I should've chosen door number 3.


#101

GasBandit

GasBandit

WHO ORDERS NONE PIZZA LEFT BEEF?!


#102

strawman

strawman

I wouldn't've allowed contractions for this.


#103

fade

fade

stienman said:
I wouldn't've allowed contractions for this.
Click to expand...
If anybody here is an expert in contractions...


#104

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

A foolish idea for foolish fools.


#105

PatrThom

PatrThom

A to Z, it is I.

--Patrick


#106

GasBandit

GasBandit

Yoshimickster said:
A foolish idea for foolish fools.
Click to expand...


If she's 18, I'm an ocelot.


#107

MindDetective

MindDetective

Introduce conflict. Rising action. Climax. Denouement.


#108

Cheesy1

Cheesy1

MindDetective said:
Introduce conflict. Rising action. Climax. Denouement.
Click to expand...
Mind Detective describes Nick's Prom Night™.


#109

Dave

Dave

Cheesy made me laugh out loud.


#110

GasBandit

GasBandit

Refresh "Watched Threads" in forum menu.


#111

PatrThom

PatrThom

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo...dangit!

--Patrick


#112

fade

fade

Six feet of earth are heavy.


#113

Tinwhistler

Tinwhistler

Don't say Candlejack? What do you[DOUBLEPOST=1410816274,1410815999][/DOUBLEPOST]On a more serious note:

Well, at least she's alive. Again.


#114

GasBandit

GasBandit

Tinwhistler said:
Well, at least she's alive. Again.
Click to expand...
The sequel:
Yes, but she came back wrong.


#115

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

WE ARE ALL FILLED WITH BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!


#116



BErt

Yeah girl, that's a nice...penis?


#117

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

Tomorrow's Talk Like A Pirate Day.


#118

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

Today's talk like a Marine Day.
ALL HAIL THE GLORIOUS WORLD GOVERNMENT!


#119

Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

Yoshimickster said:
Today's talk like a Marine Day.
ALL HAIL THE GLORIOUS WORLD GOVERNMENT!
Click to expand...
Man, what marines have you been talking to?


#120

Yoshimickster

Yoshimickster

Ravenpoe said:
Man, what marines have you been talking to?
Click to expand...
The ones who fight White Beard.


#121

GasBandit

GasBandit

Yoshimickster said:
WE ARE ALL FILLED WITH BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!
Click to expand...
He punched out all my blood!


#122

strawman

strawman

Well, ultrasound indicates it's a girl.


#123

Emrys

Emrys

stienman said:
Well, ultrasound indicates it's a girl.
Click to expand...
Something you need to share, @stienman?


#124

PatrThom

PatrThom

Emrys said:
Something you need to share, @stienman?
Click to expand...
The @stienman is not for sharing.

--Patrick


#125

Emrys

Emrys

PatrThom said:
The @stienman is not for sharing.

--Patrick
Click to expand...
:(


#126

CrimsonSoul

CrimsonSoul

I fart in your general direction!


#127

PatrThom

PatrThom

Stalin. Hitler. Pinochet. Buncha amateurs.

--Patrick


#128

Cheesy1

Cheesy1

"Hate" is such an insufficient term.


#129

filmfanatic

filmfanatic

Let me tell you about "hate".


#130

jwhouk

jwhouk

Tied game. Lost toss. OT sucks.


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