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This is how you green energy (or rather, probably murky white)

#1

GasBandit

GasBandit



Pornhub is boldly taking wearable tech where no piece of wearable tech has gone before.

The porn site is developing a new product called the “Wankband” (site is SFW) that you wear on your wrist to charge your phone while you masturbate.

It is described as “the first wearable tech that allows you to love the planet by loving yourself” because it uses only kinetic energy to charge the band which you can then use to power your phone.

The device contains a valve with a small weight that moves around as you move your arm to generate and store energy.

There’s also a USB port on the side, so you can connect it to any compatible tech product that needs charging.

“When your partner catches you in the act,” the company says in the promo video. “You can simply say that you are just trying to save on the electric bill.”

While it’s not yet available for purchase, you can sign up to be a Beta tester on their site.


#2

Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

Hello, warranty department? Yeah... my battery exploded.


#3

Emrys

Emrys

Damn, before @bhamv3 got married, he could have powered all of Taiwan. :p


#4

Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

Damn, before @bhamv3 got married, he could have powered all of Taiwan. :p
Now he can only power half of Taiwan, because the other half of the time is spent trying to hide it from the wife.


#5

PatrThom

PatrThom

Now he can only power half of Taiwan, because the other half of the time is spent trying to hide it from the wife.
Attach one to @bhamv3, attach another to bhamv's partner.
Problem solved.

--Patrick


#6

Dave

Dave

Give them out free to high schools and attach them to the national grid. BAM! No more dependence on fossil fuels.


#7

Terrik

Terrik

Waking is now your patriotic duty.


#8

PatrThom

PatrThom

Waking is now your patriotic duty.
...autocorrect?

--Patrick


#9

Terrik

Terrik

Naturally.


#10

bhamv3

bhamv3

I'd just like to point out that given how infrequently I post in the I Just Had Sex thread, I can still power all of Taiwan.

*grumble grumble whine whine*


#11

Emrys

Emrys

I would like you to be my Czar of Energy when I take over the world.


#12

ThatNickGuy

ThatNickGuy

Mandatory use in sperm donation clinics!


#13

GasBandit

GasBandit



#14

PatrThom

PatrThom

Don't dink and drive.

--Patrick


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