Twilight : New Moon

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Coming out this week.

So how many are being dragged by their significant others?

Beautiful vampires that shine in the sun... sweet jesus make me die.
 
Thankfully my wife is one of the few women that thought Twilight was a good book read but otherwise didn't become obsessed with characters like Edward, we skip the movies.
 
C

Chazwozel

I had my wife watch Interview with the Vampire to show her what real vampires do. Louis is as close as the movie gets to pansy vampire, and he's still fucking Hulk compared to the pussy vampires in Twilight.
 

North_Ranger

Staff member
I will be carrying a copy of Dracula with me, just so I have something to beat the tobacco juice out of anyone who starts talking about this movie in my immediate vicinity.

Granted, it's a small book, but that only means I get to slap them a few times more.
 
Beautiful vampires that shine in the sun... sweet jesus make me die.
Not shine, but SPARKLE...


I watched a bootleg copy to see what the heck all the hub-bub was about... and because it was a cam when he showed Bella the sparkling you couldn't see the effect... i was all WHAT?! Then i read about it and went WHAT THE FUCK, wasn't the movie stupid enough on it's own, they had to make him sparkle!? Sparkle... i mean shit, who even came up with that...
 

Cajungal

Staff member
I will be carrying a copy of Dracula with me, just so I have something to beat the tobacco juice out of anyone who starts talking about this movie in my immediate vicinity.

Granted, it's a small book, but that only means I get to slap them a few times more.
Wanna borrow my annotated, hardback copy of Dracula? It's about an inch and a half thick. :D
 
I had my wife watch Interview with the Vampire to show her what real vampires do. Louis is as close as the movie gets to pansy vampire, and he's still fucking Hulk compared to the pussy vampires in Twilight.
What was her reaction?

Also, Blade. Even if you don't like the films, self-wanking, sparkly vampires definitely need not apply.
 
C

Chazwozel

I had my wife watch Interview with the Vampire to show her what real vampires do. Louis is as close as the movie gets to pansy vampire, and he's still fucking Hulk compared to the pussy vampires in Twilight.
What was her reaction?

Also, Blade. Even if you don't like the films, self-wanking, sparkly vampires definitely need not apply.[/QUOTE]


She liked it. All chicks like Ann Rice.
 
I had my wife watch Interview with the Vampire to show her what real vampires do. Louis is as close as the movie gets to pansy vampire, and he's still fucking Hulk compared to the pussy vampires in Twilight.
What was her reaction?

Also, Blade. Even if you don't like the films, self-wanking, sparkly vampires definitely need not apply.[/QUOTE]


She liked it. All chicks like Ann Rice.[/QUOTE]

You could show her 30 Days of Night to remove the Ann Rice factor.

*smiley removed because the source doesn't support hotlinking*
 
Also: She watched the Batman/Superman: Public Enemies with me today. Of her own free will. Heeeeeeeeeeell yeah.
 
W

WolfOfOdin

No. No no no no no no no no no.

Last vampire movie I saw in theaters was 30 Days of Night...you know, where the vampires are vicious, brutal and predatory monsters covered in gore, like they should be.

..Oddly enough I do like True Blood. Anna Paquin naked helps
 
So, I decided to finally watch Twilight to see it it's really as bad as everyone makes it out to be.

Oh, yeah, it was worse that I had imagined.

The dialogue sounded like it was written by a 7 year old. None of the characters were developed enough to give a rats ass about. The acting was HORRIBLE. The love scenes made the scenes with Anakin and Padme seem awesome by comparison.
 

ElJuski

Staff member
No. No no no no no no no no no.

Last vampire movie I saw in theaters was 30 Days of Night...you know, where the vampires are vicious, brutal and predatory monsters covered in gore, like they should be.

..Oddly enough I do like True Blood. Anna Paquin naked helps
Actually, like they should be is neither Twilight nor that schlocky-ass 30 Days of Night, though it'd be nice to see them do the latter kind of visceral beast better.

BUT, that's not really the vampire in the classical sense. BUT, the vampire in the classical sense is pretty outdated. BUT, I wouldn't mind seeing a movie set in contemporary times that did the classical mind-fucking without devolving into the sexual allure.
 

ElJuski

Staff member
The difference being that Dracula works its sexuality through subjugation and assimilation--there's a strong sense of rape and deflowering--through the sexual hangups--the heavy homosexual slant--and through sexual no-nos--Lucy Ford and her little boy nabbin'.

You know, instead of hot guys and hot chicks all suckin on your :O

---------- Post added at 04:35 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:33 PM ----------

In other words, yes, by their very nature vampires are connected to sexual feelings. The difference is that good vampire stories use the sexuality as a point of fear or social commentary rather than completely inverting it--ala Twilight and making turning it into romance or a sex that we actively want.
 
You do realize that though Bram Stoker defined the modern vampire mythos, it's not the holy bible of what vampires should be like, right?
 
My brother and I are going at midnight tonight, and I'm super excited.

Notes down that HowDroll doesn't mind creepy dudes sneaking in her bedroom at night to watch her sleep while holding back the impulse to rip her throat out.

Good to know i'll have something to do this holiday season...
 
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