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Wherein I expound upon a true and indisputable fact

Dec 11, 2012#1

Chad Sexington

Wal-Mart is despair.

That it was what it is made of. The ingredients for building a Wal-Mart are as follows: ignorance, greed, obesity and despair. It's 99.9% the last one there.

Wal-Mart is a special hell. You walk in there and immediately are destroyed. You're lost, crippled and alone. It doesn't matter how you arrived, you've been stripped of what made you human. Now you are naught but despair and longing for what may have once been humanity, but it is a vague memory and you can barely fight for it.

The diffused lighting stuns you.

Where are you

Who are you

Is time real

This is death. This is eternity.

Why is that obese man wearing a fox tail and tugging on his corpulent wife's thong?

Because you are sinful.

Dec 11, 2012#2

bhamv3

Plus its stock dropped today!

Stupid Wal-Mart.

Dec 11, 2012#3

Tress

I like Walmart. It makes me feel better about my own life. For example, thinking "At least I'm not in a Walmart right now" makes me feel better about almost any situation.

Dec 12, 2012#4

Emrys

Does that mean those of us who work/used to work there are devils?
Excellent!

Dec 12, 2012#5

Tress

No, I believe it makes you The Damned.

Dec 12, 2012#6

blotsfan

I shop at walmart. It has low prices on things that I buy.

Dec 12, 2012#7

Dave

It's also the cheapest place to buy groceries.

Dec 12, 2012#8

Tress

blotsfan said:
I shop at walmart. It has low prices on things that I buy.

In all seriousness, I think some Walmarts are hell pits while others are just large stores with cheap items. It really varies by location. I've been to one around here that was perfectly fine, but the one closest to me is a horrible, awful, filthy place filled with sad and/or disgusting people.

Dec 12, 2012#9

Hylian

Wal-Mart is a special place.

It is a place that simultaneously makes me feel better about myself and yet depletes my hope for humanity, but maybe those two things are not unrelated.

Dec 12, 2012#10

Charlie Don't Surf

I try to enter a Wal*Mart as few times as possible

Dec 12, 2012#11

Dave

Charlie Don't Surf said:
I try to enter a Wal*Mart as few times as possible

When you have a family and get on a budget, this will change.

Dec 12, 2012#12

Azurephoenix

Dave said:
When you have a family and get on a budget, this will change.

Hard to argue with this... though personally I have managed to stay out of WalMart more often than not.

Dec 12, 2012#13

Gusto

I once went to a WalMart in Michigan.

Dec 12, 2012#14

GasBandit

I bought a machete from walmart for 12 dollars.

It was the best christmas ever.

Dec 12, 2012#15

Azurephoenix

GasBandit said:
I bought a machete from walmart for 12 dollars.

It was the best christmas ever.

That's gotta be some quality steel there

Dec 12, 2012#16

Frank

Gusto said:
I once went to a WalMart in Michigan.

Man, just listening to the Comedy Button gives me an idea of what that might've been like but my imagination probably doesn't live up.

Dec 12, 2012#17

drawn_inward

Dave said:
When you have a family and get on a budget, this will change.

The folks that I know that get all uppity about Walmart, shop at Target. Besides, living in the middle of the U.S. means that most of your produce/fish isn't going to be fresh; even if you go to Sprouts/Whole Foods.

I eat at McDonald's.
I shop at Walmart.
:aaah:

Dec 12, 2012#18

Emrys

Tress said:
No, I believe it makes you The Damned.

Well, I escaped, so that makes me The Darned.

Dec 12, 2012#19

fade

I buy things from Walmart. I think of it as a building in which I exchange money for goods. I honestly have no other opinion of it. My wife does. Maybe it's because I grew up poor.

Dec 12, 2012#20

WasabiPoptart

Dave said:
When you have a family and get on a budget, this will change.

Nope, hasn't changed for me. I go there when I am absolutely desperate to find something (like how it is the only store here that sells kid's shorts year round). I rarely even go to the NEX/AAFES stores because they carry a lot of low quality items and high priced designer crap I don't want or need. I'd rather spend more money for better made/quality items so I don't have to replace them over and over.

Dec 12, 2012#21

Gared

WasabiPoptart said:
Nope, hasn't changed for me. I go there when I am absolutely desperate to find something (like how it is the only store here that sells kid's shorts year round). I rarely even go to the NEX/AAFES stores because they carry a lot of low quality items and high priced designer crap I don't want or need. I'd rather spend more money for better made/quality items so I don't have to replace them over and over.

But, isn't food the one household item that, by definition, has to be replaced over and over?

Dec 12, 2012#22

GasBandit

For purposes of this discussion, are we counting Sam's Clubs and CostCo stores as wal-mart equivalents?

Dec 12, 2012#23

PatrThom

Gusto said:
I once went to a WalMart in Michigan.

I've seen the pictures.

I live in a Michigan community which is debating whether or not to demolish a church to put up a Wal~Mart.
Truly, it is out of control.

--Patrick

Dec 12, 2012#24

Gared

GasBandit said:
For purposes of this discussion, are we counting Sam's Clubs and CostCo stores as wal-mart equivalents?

I think we'd have to. And after shopping at several of the Costco locations around here, I'd have to say that Costco customers are just as shockingly degenerate as WalMart customers, except that they have more money to be shockingly degenerate with.

Dec 12, 2012#25

GasBandit

In that case, people can STFU, cause Sam's Club and CostCo rule, when it comes to groceries.

Dec 12, 2012#26

Gared

GasBandit said:
In that case, people can STFU, cause Sam's Club and CostCo rule, when it comes to groceries.

Indeed. Which reminds me, I really need to get my membership renewed. It's getting to be that time of year when I crave a good standing rib roast, and theirs are always much cheaper, and of similar or better quality, than the grocery stores in the area. Mmmm.... standing rib roast.

Dec 12, 2012#27

Charlie Don't Surf

I think CostCo treats its employees like humans.

Dec 12, 2012#28

sixpackshaker

I think a lot of my Wal-Mart hate comes from the fact that I remember when they were a decent company.

Dec 12, 2012#29

WasabiPoptart

Gared said:
But, isn't food the one household item that, by definition, has to be replaced over and over?

I don't know if the WalMart closest to me sells groceries. It's too far away for me to go grocery shopping there any way.

Dec 12, 2012#30

Dave

WasabiPoptart said:
I don't know if the WalMart closest to me sells groceries. It's too far away for me to go grocery shopping there any way.

They are building a Wal*Mart grocery store about 5 blocks from my house. I could hardly be happier.

Dec 12, 2012#31

jwhouk

Dave said:
It's also the cheapest place to buy groceries.

Outside of Aldi's, of course. But there, you need a quarter for a shopping cart.

Dec 12, 2012#32

Zappit

Someone's gotta make Target look good.

Dec 12, 2012#33

blotsfan

jwhouk said:
Outside of Aldi's, of course. But there, you need a quarter for a shopping cart.

And have to pay for grocery bags.

Dec 12, 2012#34

strawman

jwhouk said:
Outside of Aldi's, of course. But there, you need a quarter for a shopping cart.

http://www.thingiverse.com/thing:29855

Dec 12, 2012#35

Krisken

I go out of my way to eat at local restaurants and shop at local stores despite not being very wealthy. For food, though, it's very tough. The only place locally that sells grocery items and isn't a chain of some sort is a very small market.

Dec 13, 2012#36

Ravenpoe

stienman said:
http://www.thingiverse.com/thing:29855

But but... how will Tom Hanks pay for his hamburgers?

Dec 13, 2012#37

strawman

Ravenpoe said:
But but... how will Tom Hanks pay for his hamburgers?

He'll just have to learn how to pry a diamond off his diamond encrusted Mercedes.

Dec 13, 2012#38

Yoshimickster

One of my personal nightmare? Being in a Wal-mart parking lot after 8 o' clock. I saw "Price of Low Prices" in High School, Wal-mart parking lots are dangerous as FUCK!

Dec 13, 2012#39

Gared

Yoshimickster said:
One of my personal nightmare? Being in a Wal-mart parking lot after 8 o' clock. I saw "Price of Low Prices" in High School, Wal-mart parking lots are dangerous as FUCK!

There someplace we can see this particular documentary? The only mention I can find of it is on a comments section of Ripoff Report, buried deep in the comments under someone's complaint that he was "falsely accused" of eating something without paying for it, amid calls for God to smite Walmart for being ungodly and unholy, and how dare the police arrest this man without asking the cashier who rang him up (even though he had a receipt that showed that he did not, in fact, pay for his food), and then goes on to insist that the police are in cahoots with Walmart because they took him to a jail in a nearby county and held him there, during which time they showed him a 5 page rapsheet of other "false claims" of crimes he had committed...

Dec 13, 2012#40

sixpackshaker

I think "The High Cost of Low Prices" was a Frontline Documentary.[DOUBLEPOST=1355430637][/DOUBLEPOST]

nope, I was wrong

Dec 13, 2012#41

Yoshimickster

Dammit, I was gonna post that!

Yeah, because of that movie I am almost never in a Wal-mart.

Dec 13, 2012#42

Officer_Charon

I think it might have more to do with the restraining order...

Dec 13, 2012#43

strawman

Officer_Charon said:
I think it might have more to do with the restraining order...

Well it's Walmart's fault for carrying turbo lax, spark plugs, and plush animals all in one store. What did they think Yoshi'd do there?

Dec 13, 2012#44

General Specific

Chad Sexington said:
Wal-Mart is a special hell.

Dec 14, 2012#45

LittleKagsin

Not gonna lie, I like Wal-Mart just fine. It's a one stop shopping exerience for cheap. And being on budget, as others have said, makes it pretty appealing. Also...my husband works there, so we get a discount...

It's totally fine to hate it all you want, (In fact Nate and I call it the Evil Empire), but I can't deny that it's been a good place for Nate to have a steady job that is above miniumum wage and works with his school schedule.

Hello, my name is Christa and I shop at Wal*mart.

Dec 14, 2012#46

Officer_Charon

Hi Christa!

We prefer not to go to Wal-Mart for the simple reason it's always so crowded here... even at 2300. We do most of our shopping at Kroger or Publix.

Dec 14, 2012#47

LittleKagsin

I feel like I should take you on a tour of the Wal*Mart that we shop at, because...it's actually really quite nice. And since it's on the South end of town, more people go to the one on the North end of town, so it's not crowded at all. It's clean, any questionable people you would possibly meet are at the North one, it's not so bad.

We don't have a Kroger, per say, we have Kmart and I know Kroger owns them, but..it's just a Kmart and..no Publix. I haven't even ever heard of Publix.

Dec 14, 2012#48

ScytheRexx

I have a Wal-Mart and a Target across the street from each other where I live. Needless to say even with the slightly higher prices I always go to Target unless my wife makes me get something that is only located at the Wal-Mart. I don't know what it is, maybe it's despair, but whenever I enter Wal-Mart I look like this...

Dec 14, 2012#49

Frank

In the little suburban city I live in, the building that used to be a Wal-Mart, and after Wal-Mart abandoned it to build the monolithic Wal-Mart Super Center on the outskirts of town, became a Zellers, which has now been sold to Target and is now being renovated larger for Target's recent excursion into Canada. It was a Woolco before that.

Storied history in that shitty department store building.

Dec 14, 2012#50

North_Ranger

No Wal-Mart in Finland. Closest equivalent would be Lidl, which sells a lot of goods for cheap. I've never been there, and never intend to, simply because of the fact that a lot of those cheap goods are products coming from Germany or Austria. Whenever possible, I try to purchase domestic goods - even if that means paying an extra euro for a pound of hamburger.

Dec 14, 2012#51

Ravenpoe

North_Ranger said:
No Wal-Mart in Finland. Closest equivalent would be Lidl, which sells a lot of goods for cheap. I've never been there, and never intend to, simply because of the fact that a lot of those cheap goods are products coming from Germany or Austria. Whenever possible, I try to purchase domestic goods - even if that means paying an extra euro for a pound of hamburger.

But why wouldn't you want hamburger from Hamburg?

Dec 14, 2012#52

North_Ranger

Ravenpoe said:
But why wouldn't you want hamburger from Hamburg?

Maybe for the same reason you don't want your tortillas from Mexico?

Dec 14, 2012#53

Ravenpoe

North_Ranger said:
Maybe for the same reason you don't want your tortillas from Mexico?

American tortillas might actually be made in Mexico.

Dec 14, 2012#54

Gared

Ravenpoe said:
American tortillas might actually be made in Mexico.

I'd pay a lot for fresh, handmade tortillas from Mexico, if I lived near the border and could get them fresh, instead of living in Washington.

Dec 14, 2012#55

drifter

I'm mildly surprised you don't make them yourself, seems like you'd be about it.

Dec 14, 2012#56

Gared

drifter said:
I'm mildly surprised you don't make them yourself, seems like you'd be about it.

I don't have a tortilla press.

Dec 14, 2012#57

drifter

Honest question, as I am generally content with store-bought: is a tortilla press that much easier/better than using a rolling pin?

Dec 14, 2012#58

strawman

The walmarts near us are reasonably nice, rarely annoyingly busy, and have cheap stuff. Don't shop at them often, simply because Amazon is often just as good on price, and, hey, I don't have to get up.

I've never seen anything interesting enough there to post on "people of walmart," so I'm either blind, or part of the problem, or the demographic in this area has little of that.

Dec 14, 2012#59

Ravenpoe

drifter said:
Honest question, as I am generally content with store-bought: is a tortilla press that much easier/better than using a rolling pin?

A rolling pin would alter the texture, and could affect the cooking evenness, but I honestly don't know if it would be enough to taste.

Dec 14, 2012#60

Gared

Ravenpoe said:
A rolling pin would alter the texture, and could affect the cooking evenness, but I honestly don't know if it would be enough to taste.

I think it's mainly a consistency issue, as well as a thickness issue. Any time I've watched people attempt to make tortillas with a rolling pin (and we're talking corn tortillas here, not flour), they wind up way too thick and then they're dry and nasty.

Dec 14, 2012#61

WasabiPoptart

Ravenpoe said:
American tortillas might actually be made in Mexico.

I get really good tortillas that are made here in Hawaii. Better than the "Mexican" brand that sells really well.

Dec 15, 2012#62

Covar

stienman said:
I've never seen anything interesting enough there to post on "people of walmart," so I'm either blind, or part of the problem, or the demographic in this area has little of that.

Wal-Mart is the top retailer in the country. I'm pretty sure the demographic of Wal-Mart has little of that.

Dec 15, 2012#63

Yoshimickster

I just can't go into a Wal-mart without dreams of...things...happening...that are not illegal in any way. And don't involve explosions.

Dec 15, 2012#64

jwhouk

People are people, whether it's a Wal-Mart or a city park.

Dec 15, 2012#65

Ravenpoe

Yoshimickster said:
I just can't go into a Wal-mart without dreams of...things...happening...that are not illegal in any way. And don't involve explosions.

I think this is a problem with you and not the Wal-Mart.

Dec 15, 2012#66

WasabiPoptart

Yoshi needs to get the hell out of southern New Jersey. I used to think it was just me because I was surrounded by redneck yahoos in my small town. However, now I see the effect has a wider range. Run, Yoshi, before your brain turns to oatmeal!

Dec 16, 2012#67

LittleSin

Frank said:
In the little suburban city I live in, the building that used to be a Wal-Mart, and after Wal-Mart abandoned it to build the monolithic Wal-Mart Super Center on the outskirts of town, became a Zellers, which has now been sold to Target and is now being renovated larger for Target's recent excursion into Canada. It was a Woolco before that.

Storied history in that shitty department store building.

Oh man. Woolco.

Dec 16, 2012#68

Officer_Charon

WasabiPoptart said:
Run, Yoshi, before your brain turns to oatmeal!

Too late.

Dec 16, 2012#69

Cajungal

My favorite people-of-Walmart moment was actually at the nicest Walmart I've ever been to. It was only a grocery store--no clothes or electronics or anything. It wasn't 24-hour either, so it was cleaner and more organized. People who worked there were generally nice and seemed to be happier. It was also across the parking lot from my apartment at the time, so I could walk!

So I was grabbing a few quick things, and I passed by this woman. I have 42" hips, and this woman must have been 3x that. She was wearing white stretch pants, a couple of sizes too small, under which I could clearly see a pink thong. Those harsh Walmart lights made it extremely clear. I understand that Walmart isn't a fancy place, and there will always be pajama-clad people there, but good lord. I should have told her something (not to be rude, just to inform her) but what the hell can you say??

Dec 16, 2012#70

Officer_Charon

Dec 16, 2012#71

LordRendar

Ravenpoe said:
But why wouldn't you want hamburger from Hamburg?

I am frim Hamburg and our hamburgers arent that great.Maybe because we feel like it is cannibalism.A Hamburger eating a hamburger. Our fishsandwhiches are super though.Or the smoked eel.

Dec 16, 2012#72

North_Ranger

LordRendar said:
Or the smoked eel.

Are your hovercrafts full of them?

Dec 16, 2012#73

Cajungal

Officer_Charon said:

Yep, that works. But I don't have an authoritative voice like you, officer!

Dec 16, 2012#74

Officer_Charon

You should: you're a teacher! One step removed from God Almighty as far as some kids are concerned! You have power - use it for Good! *grins*

Dec 16, 2012#75

Yoshimickster

WasabiPoptart said:
Run, Yoshi, before your brain turns to oatmeal!

Oh please, its more like a stack of pancakes with a side of home-fries, now for only 9 dollars at Rodeos!

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