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You aren't getting fat fast enough.

#1

GasBandit

GasBandit

My latest shameless copypasta:

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Burger King Delivers of the Day: Because America is clearly not get fat fast enough, Burger King has begun testing home delivery at a handful of restaurants in the Washington, D.C. area.

The success of the program will eventually lead to a nationwide rollout.

A few restrictions apply: Customers must live within a 10-minute drive from a BK location, and a $2 delivery charge will be tacked on to orders below the minimum total of $8 to $10.

Every whopper and fries will be hand-delivered to your door within 30 minutes or less using “new delivery packaging technology” engineered to keep your food warm from the grill to your gullet. (So that’s what NASA’s been up to since they scrubbed the Space Shuttle program!)

This isn’t Burger King’s first foray into stay-on-your-couch convenience: Internationally, the chain has been in the delivery business for some time.

“Burger King has had great success with it all across the globe including in Mexico, Turkey, Brazil, Columbia and Peru,” said spokeswoman Kristen Hauser. “e are currently testing the service to bring this convenience to the United States, starting with just a few restaurants in the DC area.”

Breakfast food will not be available for delivery, so what’s even the point of this if you ask me.

[latimes.]
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#2



makare

thats... really silly i think.

speaking of BK i got coupons in the mail the other day for like 1 whopper if you buy a whopper or 1 chicken sandwich if you buy a chicken sandwich. what the hell am i going to do with two whoppers or two chicken sandwiches? at least one was a free small fry. THAT i can understand.


#3

Frank

Frankie Williamson

Give one to someone?


#4

Covar

Covar

Get one for a friend?

Or help someone else not have to suffer eating Burger King.


#5

HCGLNS

HCGLNS

Goto restaurant
Eat fast food
Get fat
Repeat
Critical Error "Unable to goto restaurant: TOO FAT"
Restaurant Fast food goto TOO FAT.


#6



makare

Yeah but if I am eating at BK it is because 1 nothing else is open 2 i am in one hell of a hurry. I would never go out to eat with my friend to burger king. I like my out to eat experiences to be nice.


#7

GasBandit

GasBandit

I eat at BK because of its location. It is between my office and home with no turns necessary.

Thank god it's not a taco bell there.


#8

Frank

Frankie Williamson

The little suburb I live in couldn't support a BK (one opened but closed after 6 months) but it can support 4 separate McDonald's all open 24/7.


#9

Shegokigo

Shegokigo

I heard one guy is pretty happy about the news:



#10

Covar

Covar

This thread makes Jamie Oliver cry.



#11



makare

I thought about sending those coupons to my parents but then i thought the last thing overweight diabetics need is free burger king coupons. I think ill just throw them away.


#12

Officer_Charon

Officer_Charon

Or, y'know, you could send 'em to me.


#13



makare

arent you supposed to be getting in shape for something?


#14

Officer_Charon

Officer_Charon

.... This is what I get for sharing my goals for the year. :(


#15

GasBandit

GasBandit

makare said:
arent you supposed to be getting in shape for something?
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Hey, round is a shape.


#16



makare

Aw I am a giant fatass I am not judging. I just would never help someone screw up their goals if i could help it.


#17

Baerdog

Baerdog

makare said:
I like my out to eat experiences to be nice.
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:unibrow:


#18

Terrik

Terrik

America is getting slow. China has been doing this for years. McDonalds has 24 hrs delivery service. I've used it once or twice on numerous occasions.

Here's KFCs ordering website.


#19

General Specific

General Specific

I wonder if i can get them to deliver to a McDonald's?


#20

strawman

strawman



#21

Frank

Frankie Williamson

Terrik said:
America is getting slow. China has been doing this for years. McDonalds has 24 hrs delivery service. I've used it once or twice on numerous occasions.

Here's KFCs ordering website.
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God damn it, where I live you can get Pizza (or the other kind of shit pizza joints make, donairs, etc) or Chinese food, that's it. If KFC or Mary Brown's delivered, that's it for me.


#22

Terrik

Terrik

Frankie Williamson said:
God damn it, where I live you can get Pizza (or the other kind of shit pizza joints make, donairs, etc) or Chinese food, that's it. If KFC or Mary Brown's delivered, that's it for me.
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Hell, there's a website called Sherpa's that I use in Shanghai. It's a delivery service where I can order food from nearly any restaurant for a very low price. I abuse it so much. Burgers, pizza, Italian---whatever. It's fantastic. Place the order, the Sherpa's guy goes to the restaurant, picks up the food and delivers it fresh.

I noticed in a few Asian countries there is a crap ton of convenience when it comes to food. In S. Korea, I could order food from a restaurant, they would deliver it with actual silverware and dishes. You'd eat the meal and then place the dishes outside your door. The delivery guy would come back an hour later and pick up the dishes.


#23

Shegokigo

Shegokigo

We have a service like that here in lower Texas. Pretty ingenious little set up. Small cost, decent profit gain, no actual start up cost required.


#24

LittleSin

LittleSin

KFC doesn't deliver in other places?


#25

AshburnerX

AshburnerX

Yeah, KFC used to do delivery here in Ohio until the mid-90's, then it stopped. They still do it in a lot of places overseas though, such as the Philippines. This isn't really that strange an idea... if I can order out for pizza, Chinese, coneys, pasta, or subs, why shouldn't I be able to get burgers too?

Hell, if it wasn't BK, I'd be all over this.


#26



makare

Yeah it is the BK-ness that makes me go ugh.

If kfc delivered here that might be nice. My mom always wants me to go get kfc and I hate it so I say NO HELL NO get your own damn chicken. Now she wouldn't need to bother me for it.


#27

Azurephoenix

Azurephoenix

Man, there' have been drunken nights where I would have loved for a fast food place (any fast food place... BK would suffice) to deliver where I live.


#28

GasBandit

GasBandit

If I had the ability to get Famous Bowls delivered to my door, I would be dead.


#29

sixpackshaker

sixpackshaker

I used to deliver for Schlotzky's back in the 90's... Man that was some good eating. It was Greater than Quiznos and Subway combined.


#30

Bowielee

Bowielee

Mmmmm... Schlotzky's is awesome. They have the best chicken and pesto personal pizza.


#31

Jax

Jax

I do like that they can deliver within 30 minutes for customers living within 10 minutes of the location... That's like a full 20 minutes that they can dedicate to 'fast food' :rolleyes:


#32

Mathias

Mathias

makare said:
thats... really silly i think.

speaking of BK i got coupons in the mail the other day for like 1 whopper if you buy a whopper or 1 chicken sandwich if you buy a chicken sandwich. what the hell am i going to do with two whoppers or two chicken sandwiches? at least one was a free small fry. THAT i can understand.
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Fucking eat both? While 2 burgers is more fat and calories, it's really not much more than a burger and fries, and two burgers fills you up more so you'll eat less later.


#33

Gusto

Gusto

I generally dislike fast food fries, so I typically go for two burgers instead of a combo.

I recently found out that around here, if you're willing to pay, you can get liquor delivered to you. I'm glad my life hasn't slid far enough down The Bad Path for me to investigate this further.


#34

Baerdog

Baerdog

There's a liquor store that delivers just down my street but I still can't find a restaurant that will bring me decent fried chicken.


#35



makare

I wouldn't want to eat two burgers. I am barely interested enough to eat one.

I amused by delivery liquor...


#36

Shegokigo

Shegokigo

I phone in my weekly wine pick up on my way home from work. It's less than a 5 min drive from my front door. Delivery would just actually make it take longer for me to be drinking my glass....


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