Playing Matchmaker for my Friends
- Thread starter Naiwen
- Start date
Honestly the question wouldn't have been a bad thread topic, as some of these aren't, but the way she starts them all out.....
I've never played "matchmaker" but I've played "try to get a friend to break up with someone"-maker.
One person ended all contact with me (though from facebook I saw that she still ended up breaking up with the guy within a month or two).
The other broke up with his girlfriend shortly thereafter, calls it one of the worst mistakes of his life and has apologized for ever subjecting any of his friends to her.
One person ended all contact with me (though from facebook I saw that she still ended up breaking up with the guy within a month or two).
The other broke up with his girlfriend shortly thereafter, calls it one of the worst mistakes of his life and has apologized for ever subjecting any of his friends to her.
I tried playing matchmaker to my adult friends once. Neither of them were into the other one (they were total strangers who only talked one time through me), but I thought they'd make a great couple. I usually don't bother though.
I'm the opposite. I'm known as the guy who breaks couples up.
It works like this:
I have lots of female friends. Many of these female friends have boyfriends. As is common in every relationship, these female friends often have their ups and downs with their boyfriends. When they have a low period, they like to come to me to vent.
Now, at this point I start pointing out the flaws of the boyfriend. Maybe I'll point out that he doesn't seem to care about her feelings very much. Maybe I'll say their long-distance relationship probably won't work, because he'll constantly be facing temptation where he is. Maybe I'll ask her if she can really imagine a long-term future with this guy, since his parents tend to be really pushy and overbearing, constantly butting into his business, and is that really the kind of life you want after you get married?
And, bit by bit, the cracks appear, and the relationship crumbles.
So far, though, I haven't suffered any karmic retribution, because I also use my powers for good. When a guy really isn't good for the girl, but she stays with him out of some twisted girlfriend-version of Stockholm syndrome, I give them the push needed to leave the guy. Thus far I've helped three girls who were sexually assaulted by their boyfriends, one girl whose boyfriend was stealing her money, one girl whose boyfriend was almost certainly cheating (99% certainty), and one girl whose boyfriend was almost certainly in the closet.
Oh, and one guy whose girlfriend was also cheating. (100% certainty here)
It works like this:
I have lots of female friends. Many of these female friends have boyfriends. As is common in every relationship, these female friends often have their ups and downs with their boyfriends. When they have a low period, they like to come to me to vent.
Now, at this point I start pointing out the flaws of the boyfriend. Maybe I'll point out that he doesn't seem to care about her feelings very much. Maybe I'll say their long-distance relationship probably won't work, because he'll constantly be facing temptation where he is. Maybe I'll ask her if she can really imagine a long-term future with this guy, since his parents tend to be really pushy and overbearing, constantly butting into his business, and is that really the kind of life you want after you get married?
And, bit by bit, the cracks appear, and the relationship crumbles.
So far, though, I haven't suffered any karmic retribution, because I also use my powers for good. When a guy really isn't good for the girl, but she stays with him out of some twisted girlfriend-version of Stockholm syndrome, I give them the push needed to leave the guy. Thus far I've helped three girls who were sexually assaulted by their boyfriends, one girl whose boyfriend was stealing her money, one girl whose boyfriend was almost certainly cheating (99% certainty), and one girl whose boyfriend was almost certainly in the closet.
Oh, and one guy whose girlfriend was also cheating. (100% certainty here)
I like to get involved in people's lives. I like people. I care about them. I want to know about them, and support them. I want to help them.
But love lives? No thank you. No... thank you.
But love lives? No thank you. No... thank you.
GasBandit
Staff member
Closest I ever came to playing matchmaker was when I was 19, a friend of mine got hit on by a girl because he drove a nice car (A Mitsubishi 3000GT), and being the inexperienced lunkhead I was, egged him on. He got those digits. A week later it was his birthday, and I used a fake ID to get a hotel room to have the party in (had to be 21 at the time.. also used that same fake ID to get booze for the party). So after about an hour and a half of birthday party, all of us "guests" just kind of look at each other, nod, and by unspoken agreement get up and leave the two of them in the hotel room. It took him a minute to figure out. "Hey, where are you guys going? Is it over already? Wha..." click goes the door, buddy loses virginity.
Yeah, within a week after that she turns into a complete psycho hosebeast and there's a huge messy breakup that I have to go and be the "backup" (I was, at the time, the physically most imposing of our clique) when he goes to her apartment to end it. He's afraid to go inside by himself. She was that scary.
I learned two important lessons from that experience.
1) Do not stick your dick in crazy.
2) Do not meddle in the romantic affairs of others.
I felt guilty for quite a while after that. Still do, a little. If I hadn't kept pushing him to call her, ask her out, take her here, do this, do that, and PROVIDED HIM A HOTEL ROOM, he probably would have been spared a traumatic experience. Ah well. Life lessons learned, character built, etc.
Yeah, within a week after that she turns into a complete psycho hosebeast and there's a huge messy breakup that I have to go and be the "backup" (I was, at the time, the physically most imposing of our clique) when he goes to her apartment to end it. He's afraid to go inside by himself. She was that scary.
I learned two important lessons from that experience.
1) Do not stick your dick in crazy.
2) Do not meddle in the romantic affairs of others.
I felt guilty for quite a while after that. Still do, a little. If I hadn't kept pushing him to call her, ask her out, take her here, do this, do that, and PROVIDED HIM A HOTEL ROOM, he probably would have been spared a traumatic experience. Ah well. Life lessons learned, character built, etc.
Sometimes, you have to stick your dick in the crazy to learn not to do it. Found that one out for myself.
Sex was amazing while it lasted, though...
Sex was amazing while it lasted, though...
This has been my experience with girls who have been fairly destructive in my life/their own lives. Crazy must mean crazy good sex?
GasBandit
Staff member
I suppose that makes sense. Some kids have to touch the stove to learn not to touch the stove, you know?
In my case, it was not knowing she was the conductor of the Crazy Train until I was invested in the relationship.
Then she broke up, day before Valentines Day, right before I was supposed to be gearing up for a deployment. THEN she really let her crazy flag fly. Saved me a lot of pain and effort, honestly.
Then she broke up, day before Valentines Day, right before I was supposed to be gearing up for a deployment. THEN she really let her crazy flag fly. Saved me a lot of pain and effort, honestly.
I was that kid, and sort of am still that kid.
I joke I'm the easiest person in the world to manipulate. Tell me not to do something, and I often do it. Is it spite? Is it stupidity? Am I insane? I may never know.
Were you Goose?
If you set up two friends be prepared to lose both.