[Thread Game] Terrible Video Game Descriptions (MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS)

GasBandit · Nov 30, 2015

Bubble181 said:
Clearly Mass Effect 2. I think 8 out of 10 loyalty mission somehow involve daddy.

You know, thinking about it, you're right. Clearly it's mass effect 2.

bhamv3 · Nov 30, 2015

Correct!

[DOUBLEPOST=1448925479,1448925276][/DOUBLEPOST]

Bubble181 · Nov 30, 2015

*insert smiley running around waving his hands in the air*

And I never even played the game!

Terrik · Nov 30, 2015

Even the teddy bears are lethal in the right hands.

bhamv3 · Nov 30, 2015

Terrik said:
Even the teddy bears are lethal in the right hands.

Either Fallout 3/4 or Five Nights at Freddy's.

Eriol · Dec 1, 2015

Eriol said:
You hear the literal voice of God booming through the environment. Also you have a habit of talking to the Devil through a 1980s-style text interface computer terminal.

I'm still surprised nobody has any idea here. Hint: less than 2 years old.

PatrThom · Dec 1, 2015

Eriol said:
I'm still surprised nobody has any idea here. Hint: less than 2 years old.

I really looked for a while once the thread got renewed but didn't find anything. Thanks for the hint.

--Patrick

GasBandit · Dec 1, 2015

I'm stumped.

evilmike · Dec 1, 2015

GasBandit said:
I'm stumped.

Eriol · Dec 1, 2015

PatrThom said:
I really looked for a while once the thread got renewed but didn't find anything. Thanks for the hint.

--Patrick

The Talos Principal

Great game. Pick it up in a steam sale. If you liked portal, you'll probably like this, though the extended story is more through reading than hearing. No portals, but it is an extremely solid first person puzzle game with multiple endings.

Cheesy1 · Dec 2, 2015

Easy one:
In the depths of the earth, you must fight fierce dragons and spherical monsters with only one weapon: the wind itself.

Bones · Dec 2, 2015

Cheesy1 said:
Easy one:
In the depths of the earth, you must fight fierce dragons and spherical monsters with only one weapon: the wind itself.

DIG-DUG

GasBandit · Dec 2, 2015

Bones said:
DIG-DUG

bhamv3 · Jan 5, 2016

"Okay, panda, you are now carrying three swords, two axes, a magic wand, a breastplate, a helmet, two pairs of boots, one pair of gloves, one belt, two rings, and a shield. Now head back to town all by yourself and sell them all, while I stand here fishing."

Ravenpoe · Jan 5, 2016

bhamv3 said:
"Okay, panda, you are now carrying three swords, two axes, a magic wand, a breastplate, a helmet, two pairs of boots, one pair of gloves, one belt, two rings, and a shield. Now head back to town all by yourself and sell them all, while I stand here fishing."

Torchlight

evilmike · Jan 5, 2016

GasBandit said:

TIL: @Terrik has a theme song.

Frank · Jan 6, 2016

Do forklifts dream of electric sheep?

DarkAudit · Jan 6, 2016

bhamv3 said:
"Okay, panda, you are now carrying three swords, two axes, a magic wand, a breastplate, a helmet, two pairs of boots, one pair of gloves, one belt, two rings, and a shield. Now head back to town all by yourself and sell them all, while I stand here fishing."

World of Warcraft

Ravenpoe · Jan 6, 2016

Frank said:
Do forklifts dream of electric sheep?

Shenmue?

Frank · Jan 6, 2016

Ravenpoe said:
Shenmue?

Noooope.

Eriol · Jan 6, 2016

bhamv3 said:
"Okay, panda, you are now carrying three swords, two axes, a magic wand, a breastplate, a helmet, two pairs of boots, one pair of gloves, one belt, two rings, and a shield. Now head back to town all by yourself and sell them all, while I stand here fishing."

For a second there I was thinking "Munchkin" with a lot of Cheat cards, but then you spoiled it with the whole "NPC" thing. And it's not a video game.

Frank · Jan 20, 2016

Frank said:
Do forklifts dream of electric sheep?

This was SOMA, just as a heads up.

Eriol · Jan 20, 2016

Frank said:
This was SOMA, just as a heads up.

Umm, link? What's that?

Bones · Jan 20, 2016

Eriol said:
Umm, link? What's that?

a brave new world, if my memory serves.

Frank · Jan 20, 2016

Eriol said:
Umm, link? What's that?

http://somagame.com/index.html

bhamv3 · Apr 28, 2016

Investigating this serial killer can wait. I'm going to flirt with this French girl first!

Ravenpoe · Apr 28, 2016

bhamv3 said:
Investigating this serial killer can wait. I'm going to flirt with this French girl first!

Every Gabriel Knight game.

Frank · Apr 28, 2016

Sounds like that rain is getting heavy there.

bhamv3 said:
Investigating this serial killer can wait. I'm going to flirt with this French girl first!

bhamv3 · Apr 28, 2016

Not Gabriel Knight and not Heavy Rain. Ok, I haven't played either of them before, so I don't know if the description is accurate. But it's not the game I had in mind.

Hint: Older PC game, though available for mobile devices now, which is how I've been playing it recently.

General Specific · Apr 29, 2016

Deadly Premonition? Is that on mobile devices?

Ravenpoe · Apr 29, 2016

General Specific said:
Deadly Premonition? Is that on mobile devices?

It is!

bhamv3 · Apr 30, 2016

But that's not the game I had in mind either.

Y'know, it sounds like a lot of murder investigators in games like to flirt with French women.

Bubble181 · Apr 30, 2016

If you class the Katarr accent as French, KOTOR?

bhamv3 · May 1, 2016

Ok, because it doesn't look like anyone's going to get it...

Broken Sword: The Shadow of the Templars

evilmike · May 1, 2016

You will need a raygun in the end, but not to shoot the Vorticon...