[Food] A Coffee Thread

[PatrThom]

As long as it keeps me awake, it's doing its job.

Pretty much the only reason I ever drink coffee.

--Patrick

 

[Fun Size]

I like my coffee like I like my women...

As long as it keeps me awake, it's doing its job.

 

[drifter]

I'm not a huge coffee drinker, so I'll toss in a pinch of salt to help cut the bitterness if it's too much. Sounds weird but it works okay as long as you don't add too much.

 

[PatrThom]

I've heard that. It seems to work.

--Patrick

 

[sixpackshaker]

I'm not a huge coffee drinker, so I'll toss in a pinch of salt to help cut the bitterness if it's too much. Sounds weird but it works okay as long as you don't add too much.

Yeah, my parents were visiting once. They made some coffee and they decided to sweeten their coffee from my salt pig...

 

[Gruebeard]

I like my coffee like I like my women...

You've got no laughs from any of the women yet. I wonder if that means anything.

 

[Celt Z]

Wait, let me take a swing at this. For science.


I like my coffee like I like my men: hot and a lot.

 

[fade]

I like my coffee like I like my women: bitter, strong, and makes me go to the bathroom half an hour later.

Am I doing it right?

 

[PatrThom]

Am I doing it right?

Sounds like you're forgetting to cream beforehand.
...unless you're saying you prefer black, that is.

--Patrick

 

[Fun Size]

ILMCLILMW: In big cups.

 

[GasBandit]

I like my coffee like I like my women: bitter, strong, and makes me go to the bathroom half an hour later.

Am I doing it right?

Let's just get em all out of the way -

I like women like I like coffee:

1) Ground up and in the freezer.
2) Tied up in a burlap sack and dragged through the Andes by a donkey.
3) Black, bitter, preferably fair trade.
4) I don't like coffee.
5) Sweet and expensive.
6) Loaded up on whiskey.
7) Pale and weak.
8) Preferably without pubic hair.
9) Hand-picked and imported from a third world country.


On the other hand, I myself AM like coffee:
Really bitter and most people don't like me without fundamentally changing some part of what I am.

 

[fade]

Let's just get em all out of the way -

I like women like I like coffee:

1) Ground up and in the freezer.
2) Tied up in a burlap sack and dragged through the Andes by a donkey.
3) Black, bitter, preferably fair trade.
4) I don't like coffee.
5) Sweet and expensive.
6) Loaded up on whiskey.
7) Pale and weak.
8) Preferably without pubic hair.
9) Hand-picked and imported from a third world country.


On the other hand, I myself AM like coffee:
Really bitter and most people don't like me without fundamentally changing some part of what I am.

You left out "without some other guy's dick in it".

 

[PatrThom]

I myself AM like coffee:
Really bitter and most people don't like me without fundamentally changing some part of what I am.

Well, at least you admit you're fluid.

--Patrick

 

[GasBandit]

Well, at least you admit you're fluid.

--Patrick

I wasn't, originally, though.

Just like coffee.[DOUBLEPOST=1487263565,1487263442][/DOUBLEPOST]

You left out "without some other guy's dick in it".

Eh, I lost my virginity in a threesome with a buddy and his girlfriend. So that's never really been a dealbreaker for me.

 

[Gared]

My wife worked for Starbucks for a couple years, so I developed a taste for some of their medium-roast coffees (Ethiopia and Kenya). But recently I've started ordering green coffee from Sweet Maria's and roasting it at home with a Whirley-Pop. It's better than Starbucks and about half the price, but you have to put some effort into it and be willing to experiment to get the roast right.

A Whirley-Pop, you say? Hmm.... got one of those for Christmas (for actually popping popcorn), maybe it's time to start looking into roasting some coffee - small batch, special occasion coffee perhaps.

Otherwise, I mostly have two modes for coffee consumption. If I'm at work and free coffee is provided, or if I stop in to a diner or cafe, I will drink it with creamer and sweetener, since it's usually the cheapest coffee a company can find. If I'm at home I prefer a good, medium- to dark-roast, single-origin coffee, which I will then either drink black or with just a hint of half-and-half for body and a touch of splenda to help bring out some of the sweeter caramelized notes.

Also, when it comes to Keurigs, who among us has a good self-pack pod brand/version that they would recommend? Aside from the occasional flavored variety for my wife, I could really do with never buying another k-cup pod again.

 

[Shakey]

A Whirley-Pop, you say? Hmm.... got one of those for Christmas (for actually popping popcorn), maybe it's time to start looking into roasting some coffee - small batch, special occasion coffee perhaps.

If yours has a plastic window on top, stay away. It gets a lot hotter than popcorn, so it might melt.

 

[fade]

I wasn't, originally, though.

Just like coffee.[DOUBLEPOST=1487263565,1487263442][/DOUBLEPOST]
Eh, I lost my virginity in a threesome with a buddy and his girlfriend. So that's never really been a dealbreaker for me.

 

[Officer_Charon]

I've always drank Folger's. I've tried a couple local grinds, but been unimpressed. At Starbucks, it's always Pike's.

Black.

I may be snobby about my beers, but my coffee-drinking is pleb-tier.

 

[DarkAudit]

I've run through the latest batch of beans, so it's off to Pittsburgh again for some more, among other things. There are two shops across the street from each other just up the block from my favorite record store. I got the Costa Rican from one last time, so now I'll try the other shop.

I've been using this chart for my measurements. A "5 cup" batch (or a "6-cup" as measured by the machine) fills my Tims travel mug twice. Just right to get me going in the morning. Just measuring and grinding the beans is "too much work" according to my sister. She hasn't tried a cup of the good stuff yet.