Whine like a baby, now with 500% more drama!

[strawman]

You didn't address the maniacal laughter, though.

That's ok, as long as it's before 10pm and after 6am.

 

[PatrThom]

- @fade leaves burnt-out hull of car.
-Is arrested and thrown in jail
(some time passes)
-"What are you in here for?"
-"....Litterin'."

--Patrick

 

[Squidleybits]

HIVES!!!

 

[DarkAudit]

-@fade leaves burnt-out hull of car.
-Is arrested and thrown in jail
(some time passes)
-"What are you in here for?"
-"....Litterin'."

--Patrick

*moves away from @fade on the Group W bench...*

 

[Dei]

Starting to wonder if by comfortable with driving, they actually meant "comfortable with not being able to read street signs but driving anyways."

 

[evilmike]

Does anyone know if it's legal to set fire to your own car while laughing maniacally?

Also--completely related--never buy a Mini Cooper.

I was going to be sympathetic but then I remembered how much gold you got away with.

 

[Squidleybits]

I went to the garden centre without a responsible adult.

 

[PatrThom]

I went to the garden centre without a responsible adult.

View attachment 24145

Give us your wallet, do.

--Patrick

 

[Yoshimickster]

Whose got two thumbs and puked RIGHT at the end of the family reunion after everything was nice beforehand? THIS GU-I am dying of embarrassment.

 

[Celt Z]

Whose got two thumbs and puked RIGHT at the end of the family reunion after everything was nice beforehand? THIS GU-I am dying of embarrassment.

Because you drank too much, or was it something you ate? Because if it's the latter, whoever made that dish is probably sharing the embarassment.

 

[Yoshimickster]

Because you drank too much, or was it something you ate? Because if it's the latter, whoever made that dish is probably sharing the embarassment.

Drank too much/ate too much, we were just about to leave so I tried to hork down my beer but it triggered my gag reflex and now I feel a fool.

 

[blotsfan]

1 hour of sleep in the last 24. I want to stay up 9 more hours. Help

 

[HCGLNS]

Crying like 45: Waaah! Waaah! Waaah! They forgot my hash-browns! Waaah!

 

[Gruebeard]

1 hour of sleep in the last 24. I want to stay up 9 more hours. Help

Go to bed!

 

[DarkAudit]

Go to bed!

Fine! I will!

 

[blotsfan]

Go to bed!

3 more minutes...

 

[Yoshimickster]

AND then ANOTHER person puked at the party and they blamed it on me because after cleaning up my OWN mess I'd apparently lie about another-OH HOW I LOVE FAMILY REUNIONS!

 

[Ravenpoe]

AND then ANOTHER person puked at the party and they blamed it on me because after cleaning up my OWN mess I'd apparently lie about another-OH HOW I LOVE FAMILY REUNIONS!

I mean, to be fair, if I found random vomit around here, I wouldn't rule you out

 

[Emrys]

I have bronchitis. Again.

 

[Yoshimickster]

I mean, to be fair, if I found random vomit around here, I wouldn't rule you out

YEAH I know, but the way my aunt just accused me like that bugged the hell out of me. A lot of people were eating/drinking, there were high chances of more than one person puking!

 

[Dei]

Going to lose my shit at the next person who says "But when I/ someone I know had LASIK they could see fine the next day."

 

[sixpackshaker]

Going to lose my shit at the next person who says "But when I/ someone I know had LASIK they could see fine the next day."

But I don't know anyone with LASIK....

 

[GasBandit]

Going to lose my shit at the next person who says "But when I/ someone I know had LASIK they could see fine the next day."

And, I am assuming, telling them "I didn't get LASIK, I got PRK" just gets blank stares?

 

[Dei]

And, I am assuming, telling them "I didn't get LASIK, I got PRK" just gets blank stares?

 

[Gruebeard]

And, I am assuming, telling them "I didn't get LASIK, I got PRK" just gets blank stares?

You got North Korea? What?

 

[GasBandit]

I immediately went and checked facebook. I was right about what set you off, but I guessed wrong as to who

 

[Dei]

I immediately went and checked facebook. I was right about what set you off, but I guessed wrong as to who

Really, it's more my dad asking on a nearly daily basis if I can see yet.

 

[jwhouk]

Well, he may be concerned about his daughter.

 

[Dei]

Well, he may be concerned about his daughter.

My dad enjoys being obnoxious for the sake of being obnoxious. He already knows how long it's supposed to take, but keeps mentioning LASIK because he knows it annoys me.

 

[fade]

Is that like knowing the slang, but using it wrong on purpose to annoy your teens? Because that's fun.

 

[Null]

Is that like knowing the slang, but using it wrong on purpose to annoy your teens? Because that's fun.

Or referencing multiple things that aren't necessarily connected / don't work that way. "Oh, hey, are you snapchatting some selfies on your instagram?"

 

[GasBandit]

Is that like knowing the slang, but using it wrong on purpose to annoy your teens? Because that's fun.

Also putting "the" in front of things that don't require a definite article. Bonus points for then pluralizing something incorrectly.

"I saw it on the facebooks."

 

[PatrThom]

Also putting "the" in front of things that don't require a definite article. Bonus points for then pluralizing something incorrectly.

"I saw it on the facebooks."

I think you meant to say "teh," as in "Teh Interwebs."

--Patrick

 

[GasBandit]

I think you meant to say "teh," as in "Teh Interwebs."

--Patrick

No, that's not a dad-ism.

 

[PatrThom]

No, that's not a dad-ism.

It is on the rare occasion that the dad texts.

--Patrick