So next on the agenda is for Wasabi to shape up. A circle may be a shape, but I don't like it on me. My face is so round. Worse, my daughter thinks I weigh 450 pounds (I forget what she was asking about, but she did compare me to something she thought would be 450 pounds). I'm not even close, but I am obese according to medical charts. It's not that I want to be thin or a certain clothing size. I want to be able to look at myself in the mirror without wanting to cry.
I keep making excuses for my poor eating habits and not exercising. My busy schedule has been the biggest obstacle. Well, I have more time on my hands so that's out the door now. I just don't know where to start. Aussie's a personal trainer. Yes, he can help and I can join the gym he works at for free. I have an exercise program he designed for me a few years ago. I have to change my eating habits though. I can't say "Oh I just need portion control" because that's only part of how I fool myself. "Oh I'll just have a little bit of this," and then I keep going back for little bits.
A bunch of my friends use MLM programs (no, friend, you aren't a "health coach" because you sell shake mix to people and I'm not buying your crap or joining your cult circle). I have a few friends who do the keto diet, which I wouldn't mind except I think it is way too restrictive. So many fruits that you can't eat. No beans. Most grains are out, including oatmeal. I want moderation, not "The Do Not Eat" list.
I think this also means I should have an exam with my doctor. Face the music. I go for my regular ob/gyn stuff. I just had a mammogram. But I haven't sat to talk with my regular doc about improving my overall health. I'm embarrassed to step on the scale, so I avoid going. But I know I need to. I hate blood draws because they are never easy. That increases my avoidance.
I hate being like this.