No, this isn't a romance or relationship post, I mean literal heart.
I haven't talked about it a whole lot, in fact even my parents and closest friends don't know the full details because I don't want them to worry, but there's potentially something wrong with my heart. Over the past several months I've had problems with hands and feet swelling at random times, and put off going to a doctor to see anything about it because at the time I was stuck working overnight shifts at work and I slept during the day during my doctor's office hours. With some other symptoms starting to pile on top of this (general weakness, tightness in chest, shortness of breath) I finally went to the doctor about a month ago, and started getting tested for a bunch of things.
A few days ago I received a heart echo, and though the imaging techs couldn't give me any sort of diagnosis as that isn't their job, they take the images for the cardiologist to interpret, my questions did get them to finally admit that they thought they saw signs of congestive heart failure. I won't get an actual confirmation from my doctor until probably tomorrow.
I called my work and told them I would need a week off, possibly more, as I sort this out, and they were understanding. Over the past month or so it's gotten to a point where I can't do any sort of strenuous activity or even be up and active without getting winded and weak feeling. Every now and then my blood pressure will just suddenly drop and I'll feel like I need to go to sleep, or I'll just nod off. If the results come back that it is congestive heart failure, I worry what that means for the future and what treatments are available, and I worry that if I'm not able to return to work I'll have no money and no insurance. This is the first time I've faced a prolonged medical issue that could actually be fatal, and the first time I've faced one that left me feeling like I can't safely work without passing out.
Like I said earlier, I haven't told anyone else. There's no point until I can get a confirmation and a firm grip on what it all means. My biggest worry is they'll come back and say everything looks fine, because if that's the case wtf is wrong with me? But I wanted to tell someone, sharing makes me feel better, and so you lot get stuck with this.
I also hate sharing bad news about myself and my own need for self depreciation means I feel obligated to point out I'm not looking for a pity party, but thankfully self reflection has gotten me to a point where I almost didn't type this sentence. Almost.
Side note: getting a heart echo fucking hurts. They never show you that in the movies, they just put a wand smack in the middle of someone's chest and everything is fine. No, they jab that sucker hard into your ribs and work it around like they're running trills on a xylophone.
I haven't talked about it a whole lot, in fact even my parents and closest friends don't know the full details because I don't want them to worry, but there's potentially something wrong with my heart. Over the past several months I've had problems with hands and feet swelling at random times, and put off going to a doctor to see anything about it because at the time I was stuck working overnight shifts at work and I slept during the day during my doctor's office hours. With some other symptoms starting to pile on top of this (general weakness, tightness in chest, shortness of breath) I finally went to the doctor about a month ago, and started getting tested for a bunch of things.
A few days ago I received a heart echo, and though the imaging techs couldn't give me any sort of diagnosis as that isn't their job, they take the images for the cardiologist to interpret, my questions did get them to finally admit that they thought they saw signs of congestive heart failure. I won't get an actual confirmation from my doctor until probably tomorrow.
I called my work and told them I would need a week off, possibly more, as I sort this out, and they were understanding. Over the past month or so it's gotten to a point where I can't do any sort of strenuous activity or even be up and active without getting winded and weak feeling. Every now and then my blood pressure will just suddenly drop and I'll feel like I need to go to sleep, or I'll just nod off. If the results come back that it is congestive heart failure, I worry what that means for the future and what treatments are available, and I worry that if I'm not able to return to work I'll have no money and no insurance. This is the first time I've faced a prolonged medical issue that could actually be fatal, and the first time I've faced one that left me feeling like I can't safely work without passing out.
Like I said earlier, I haven't told anyone else. There's no point until I can get a confirmation and a firm grip on what it all means. My biggest worry is they'll come back and say everything looks fine, because if that's the case wtf is wrong with me? But I wanted to tell someone, sharing makes me feel better, and so you lot get stuck with this.
I also hate sharing bad news about myself and my own need for self depreciation means I feel obligated to point out I'm not looking for a pity party, but thankfully self reflection has gotten me to a point where I almost didn't type this sentence. Almost.
Side note: getting a heart echo fucking hurts. They never show you that in the movies, they just put a wand smack in the middle of someone's chest and everything is fine. No, they jab that sucker hard into your ribs and work it around like they're running trills on a xylophone.
