The Wisdom of Halforums

[figmentPez]

And everybody say Jack, ooh don't you know:

You don't call ZenMonkey an ape
You don't mouth off to an admin
You don't sit on the hat of the ol' North_Ranger
and you don't troll Like JCM.



Okay, it doesn't make a lot of sense, but I'm not much of a lyricist. *sigh* maybe it would have been better just to quote the song.

 

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[General Specific]

"I'm not worried that all hell will break loose. I'm worried that a part of hell will break loose and be much harder to detect." -- George Carlin

 

[ZenMonkey]

maybe it would have been better just to quote the song.

If it makes you feel any better, it gave me a great "WTF?" moment before I realized where you were going.

As for wisdom, I'm just going to copy one of my favorite quotes of all time, from Arthur C. Clarke: "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."

 

[Bubble181]

No wisdom from me (and isn't that surprising?), but...why is it this sort of "wise words" are almost always cynical and negative? People always say I'm way too negative (and they're right), but even I don't try to live by following these rules. N_R and ZM are the only two with messages that at least can be construed as positive!

 

[doomdragon6]

Looking at a light to sneeze isn't negative.

Most of these, Bubble, are just "take on life" quotes by various people throughout the ages. And of course, a quote isn't memorable unless it's humorous.

 

[Shegokigo]

N_R and ZM are the only two with messages that at least can be construed as positive!

Excuse me?

The answer, is and forever shall be:
42

You stand corrected sir. :humph:

 

[ThatGrinningIdiot!]

Words of wisdom?
Hmmmm . . . .
One from my dad: "If you stopped whining and did the dishes already, they would've been finished by now."

 

[Shawn]

Never take life too seriously. No one ever gets out alive anyway.

 

[Nile]

N_R and ZM are the only two with messages that at least can be construed as positive!

Mine's positive!

Just... kinda morbid.

 

[redapples]

Its never Lupus!

 

[doomdragon6]

Another nugget of wisdom, gleaned from this thread:

If you're going to single someone out, single everyone out. :uhhuh:

 

[Jake]

If you shake it more than twice, you're playing with it.

 

[Gared]

You will meet a lot of people in your life. The important ones will be the ones you call friends.

 

[Fun Size]

Never cook bacon naked.

 

[Greendog]

Wear sunscreen.

(I swear someone mentioned this in a previous thread.....)

 

[Just Me]

To err is human.
To arr is pirate!

 

[Shegokigo]

If you shake it more than twice, you're playing with it.

Well that's not very useful for some....

 

[Bubble181]

42 just means we're run by mice.
Wear sunscreen I mentioned in the previous thread ;P
And cooking bacon naked is the only way to learn how to do it without splashing grease all over the place!

 

[Cuyval Dar]

Always let the Wookiee win.

 

[Greendog]

If someone asks you if you're a god, you always say yes.

 

[Fun Size]

If you shoot a barrel, there's a pretty good chance that it's gonna blow up.

 

[Cuyval Dar]

Ancient weapons and hokey religions are no match for a good blaster at your side.

 

[Hylian]

if you adventure into the dark you will be eaten by a grue

 

[Fun Size]

if you adventure into the dark you will be eaten by a grue

It's likely anyway.

 

[Cuyval Dar]

It is always a trap, except when it's not.

 

[Andromache]

people will retread memes to exhaustion, trying desperately to seem witty, and feeling a dark cold spot in their souls knowing that if they ever do create the Next Big Meme, they'll only still be popular on the Net.

 

[CynicismKills]

No wisdom from me (and isn't that surprising?), but...why is it this sort of "wise words" are almost always cynical and negative? People always say I'm way too negative (and they're right), but even I don't try to live by following these rules. N_R and ZM are the only two with messages that at least can be construed as positive!

Mine's positive, because I'm totally helping that guy out. Also it's taken from the Terry Pratchett book Jingo. The whole quote goes (father and son are fishing):

"If you give a man fire, he'll be warm for awhile, but if you set that man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
"Dad, I don't think that's how the saying goes."
"Shhh, you'll scare the fish away, son."

 

[Cuyval Dar]

people will retread memes to exhaustion, trying desperately to seem witty, and feeling a dark cold spot in their souls knowing that if they ever do create the Next Big Meme, they'll only still be popular on the Net.

Boy, if I actually cared what people on the internet thought, that might hurt. Maybe.


Back on topic:
Everyone is a hack. Especially Kurtz.

 

[figmentPez]

If it makes you feel any better, it gave me a great "WTF?" moment before I realized where you were going.

Did you get to both places I was going? It was a Jim Crocce parody, but it was also a vague Discworld reference. I figure if the Librarian gets offended at being called a monkey, then monkeys would get offended at being called apes. (There are just too few words that rhyme with cape, let alone ones that have any sort of connection to the forums.)

Okay, words of wisdom:

"Life is full of doors that don't open when you knock, equally spaced amid those that open when you don't want them to."
- Roger Zelazny

"I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in."
-Unknown

"The sublime and the ridiculous are often so nearly related that it is difficult to class them separately. One step above the sublime makes the ridiculous; and one step above the ridiculous makes the sublime again."
-Thomas Paine

Ewig ist ein langer Kauf.
(Forever is a long bargain.)
- German Proverb

"For the Female of the species is more deadly than the male."
- Rudyard Kipling

"Don't be afraid to take a big step. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps."
- David Lloyd George

"It's all fun and games until someone pokes an eye out.
Then it's a sport."
- Unknown

"And given a chance and a rock see which one breaks a window
And see which one keeps me up all night and into the day"
- "Table for Two" by Caedmon's Call on their album "40 Acres"

"The map is not the territory."
-Alfred Korzybski

 

[General Specific]

It is always a trap, except when it's not.

I always think everything is a trap. It's why I'm still alive.

 

[rac3r_x]

And so we come the end of another episode of "All My Circuits", join us next time when Calculon reveals...

 

[Andromache]

Boy, if I actually cared what people on the internet thought, that might hurt. Maybe.

wow, you actually paid attention to it?

 

[Cajungal]

I find that the best way to get through a hard day is to step outside, look at the sky/treetops, and take a long, deep breath.

Then drink a glass of water and go back to whatever you have to do.

 

[Shegokigo]

I find that the best way to get through a hard day is to step inside, look at the monitor/tv screen, and take a long, deep breath.

Then drink a glass of vodka and go back to whatever game you were playing.