Happy? Depressed?

[phil]

In highschool and some of the start of college I was. I saw a shrink for a while but I can't really say that did anything. I feel like watching and reading fight club helped more, in a weird way. After I stopped caring so much about certain things it took a lot of the pressure off.

I also try to keep in mind something my mom used to say to us as kids when we were upset about something. "If that's the worst thing that happens to you in life, you're doing ok."

I didn't graduate on time, but that's ok because I'm still going to graduate.

My girlfriend left me for some other guy, but we still had an awesome 3 years together and I'll find someone else.

I'm worried about finding a job, but so long as I can support myself thats all I need right now. If I really hate things and just can't find the job I want, well maybe I can go to school again.

 

[Rob King]

I was going to click "Not at all" when SHE appeared on my screen. "^BrUjiTa^ ha iniciado sesión".

I hear you. I thought I was over this girl, and now the most random crap reminds me about her ...

But, of course, I am NOT depressed, and even if I sometimes use this word to mean "sad", I don't like to because I feel like I'm saying that real depression is no big deal.

We talked about this a lot in my mental health ethics class. Men don't like to talk about being sad, so they talk about being depressed. It somehow sounds less girly. Which contributes to the culture of overdiagnosed depression.

 

[ZenMonkey]

Mm...none of those answers really fits me. I have what they call "secondary depression" due to my illness, which is a fancy way of saying it's the shits being sick, but that the depression comes from the illness and not the other way around. I'm definitely not clinically depressed. I work pretty hard, actually, to keep myself out of the dumps with various projects.

However, depending on how bad I'm feeling physically or other triggers, I do slip into a very dark place from time to time. Having lost almost all the capabilities of my "former" life and facing decades of this to come can really get me sometimes and then it's the whole emo dark room thing for a day or two, compounded by family and financial crap etc. etc.

Caveat: I am not claiming people with depression can just "keep themselves out of the dumps" with projects. In my own case it's about trying to carve out a meaningful life, which is what gives me joy and is what was finally taken away from me about a year ago.

 

[Bubble181]

I'm in the depressed category, I guess. Constantly trying to keep myself busy, work, visiting friends, whatever, but whenever I'm around people I just want to be alone, and whenever I'm alone, I fall in a big black pit of nothing.
It's with ups and downs, I'd been slowly crawlign upwards, I think, or just getting better at deceiving myself, but lately it's been on another downturn. Frankly, right now, I 'm starting to count it as a win if I can get out of bed; let alone get anything done -_-

 

[Twitch]

When something particularly bad happens to me, things like the death of a friend not little things like a car breaking down etc, I can get really depressed for months at a time. I just got out of one such funk and I'm pretty much happy all the time now. It's crazy how depressed High School kids are though. I get them in my office all the time and they're just messes.

 

[AshburnerX]

That's because they have a lot more stress hoisted upon them (as far as their futures go) then people did when our parents were kids. There was a time in this country when there was no shame in not being college bound... these days, your seen as sub-human if your not smart enough to get into a certain school. Pile that on top of the normal teen angst and it's really no wonder we have kids committing suicide or shooting up schools.

 

[Twitch]

Many of them do have good reasons for depression. They're gay in a society that doesn't allow it, they're pregnant, they're failing, they lost a friend, etc. But they get freaked out by things that they really shouldn't have to worry about.

 

[Ravenpoe]

I don't think I'm depressed, because I don't feel specifically sad. I have lots of happy moments, and enjoy things, though the number of things I enjoy tend to be lower in number.

It's the in-between that is punctuated with, while not what I would describe a feeling of sadness or despair or dread, is definitely a palpable feeling of "meh". These moments are times when I feel like the world is trucking on without me, and I somehow missed the bus. Unpleasant, but not the soul-crushing despair or suicidal thoughts that people tend to talk about when talking about depression.

It feels more like what I'm doing doesn't ultimately matter, and I'm just trudging through the in-between to dive into the few times I feel good again.

 

[Docseverin]

Major Depressive Disorder, and PTSD, as diagnosed by a Psychiatrist using the DSM IV. I am seeking treatment and fairly well taken care of, but the burden on the military medical services is immense.

 

[Icarus]

5-6 years ago I was very depressed - mother had died in a fire, I was out of college with no job during a bad economical time, my best friend at the time didn't seem to give a damn while I needed someone to lean on so I stopped talking to him out of anger. A girl I had met shortly before my mother died and who I cared for a lot broke up with me because she couldn't deal with my problems and her own as well. In short: no money, no job, no friends, no girlfriend, no-one to go to for support and a bleak future.

Took me some 2-3 years to get out of it - got a job which I still have, my own apartment and the extra independence helped since I didn't have to deal with my brother's shit anymore. I won't say I'm not depressed anymore because depression is something that never completely disappears but it's bearable now and I got days when I feel reasonably happy.

If I had the guts, I'd move to Australia or some other place where the people didn't get me down - I know idiots are everywhere but the nice weather and friendly people might make up for it.

 

[Philosopher B.]

I've gone through some decidedly rough patches in the last couple of years (leading up to lately) ... mostly due to my insane 'homeschooling' hippie parents and their machinations ... I don't even want to go into any specific details, lest I lapse into another funk just thinking about it ... I sometimes think the only things that keep me from having seriously suicidal thoughts are my writing, which can sometimes lift me from the dumps, music, and my siblings. I've never been diagnosed with anything, but I know enough to recognize I've got issues like a magazine (feeling worthless, bouts of anger, panic attacks, etc). I know my older sister, who my parents really fucked with mentally, she's come mad far with therapy and whatnot. I just wish ... I just wish I could be more like her. She's my biggest inspiration.

 

[drawn_inward]

In highschool and some of the start of college I was. I saw a shrink for a while but I can't really say that did anything. I feel like watching and reading fight club helped more, in a weird way. After I stopped caring so much about certain things it took a lot of the pressure off.

I also try to keep in mind something my mom used to say to us as kids when we were upset about something. "If that's the worst thing that happens to you in life, you're doing ok."

I didn't graduate on time, but that's ok because I'm still going to graduate.

My girlfriend left me for some other guy, but we still had an awesome 3 years together and I'll find someone else.

I'm worried about finding a job, but so long as I can support myself thats all I need right now. If I really hate things and just can't find the job I want, well maybe I can go to school again.

That's a nice outlook! I try to see the positive, but it's hard in some situations.

I relate with what TNG said in his post. That shit can be hard. It's a big mental game.

This might sound dumb, but if I feel like I am losing my grip, I clean and organize my apt. I also help someone that I normally wouldn't. For example, I don't like this dude I work with. He's a screw up, and is totally lazy. I started picking up his slack w/o being a dick about it (like I can be), and he was surprised. He started pulling his weight after that. That helped our work-relationship big time.

I have read that helping others helps your depression. Go work in a soup kitchen, help someone do yard work, clean their house, etc.

---------- Post added at 01:39 AM ---------- Previous post was at 01:30 AM ----------

These moments are times when I feel like the world is trucking on without me, and I somehow missed the bus. Unpleasant, but not the soul-crushing despair or suicidal thoughts that people tend to talk about when talking about depression.

It feels more like what I'm doing doesn't ultimately matter, and I'm just trudging through the in-between to dive into the few times I feel good again.

\
Brother, I went through this for 3-4 years. Exactly like you described it - apathy mixed with feeling like my wheels were spinning but I wasn't moving. I hated feeling like the world was passing me by. My friends were getting married and having kids, others were graduating or going on to other secondary schools, parents were retiring and going on cruises while I was stuck in a soul-sucking job, and slowly wading through the credit hours at college.

Start setting goals for yourself. Daily - Weekly - Monthly - Yearly. Get a white board to remind yourself. Accomplishment and having a clock to beat helped me a bunch. I wrote down stuff I wanted to accomplish for the next day, and checked off the stuff as I completed it. It helped loads. Good luck!

 

[Frank]

I am a firm believer that the United States is overmedicated, and I think too many people take medication for a chemical imbalance when they don't have one. (That's not to call anyone out specifically)

If I had to guess, though, I'd say I have some kind of anxiety disorder at the least. What would be really nice is if I had the money or the insurance to see a therapist instead of speculating about my mental health on a forum... rly:

I couldn't agree more. Exercise and diet pretty much pulled me out of my decade long slump.

 

[Seraphyn]

I don't think I'm depressed, because I don't feel specifically sad. I have lots of happy moments, and enjoy things, though the number of things I enjoy tend to be lower in number.

It's the in-between that is punctuated with, while not what I would describe a feeling of sadness or despair or dread, is definitely a palpable feeling of "meh". These moments are times when I feel like the world is trucking on without me, and I somehow missed the bus. Unpleasant, but not the soul-crushing despair or suicidal thoughts that people tend to talk about when talking about depression.

It feels more like what I'm doing doesn't ultimately matter, and I'm just trudging through the in-between to dive into the few times I feel good again.

Exactly this. I live my life, do my thing and try to enjoy myself, but life itself seems kinda 'meh'. Like every new day is 'just another day' you know?

 

[Heavan]

I'm depressed currently, but nowhere near the suicidal thoughts I had four months ago. My basic situation was that, after High School ended, most of my friends moved to another province, and I just didn't keep up with them. Instead, I became friends with my girlfriends friends... only for her to break up with me right at the end of my first year of university, and those 'friends' left when she did. This, coupled with my then-plan of dropping out of University, and I had no friends and no means of getting any because outside of school or meeting friends through current friends, I didn't know how to do it. A lot of this was probably just me overreacting, but I really made a lot of mistakes during this time because I honestly didn't think my life was worth living, and I came really close to ending it a few times only to have something (in retrospect) really mundane keep me from doing it.

A long time later, I started turning it around, so I'm really thankful those mundane things kept me from going through with it. I still don't have anyone, but I'm going back to University in five days where I hope I can figure something out. So I guess I'd call myself 'sad' now more than anything else.

 

[Math242]

i had severe bouts of depression 6-7 years ago when one of my best friends died and the other one went to live in the US for a year.

But i sucked it up and went through it

Now, i would say i'm numb most of the time. I kinda never feel sad but i never really feel happy either. I know i'm a lucky guy and my life could have been a lot of worse with all the stupid things i've done.

knowing this helps me keep things in perspective.

 

[Laurelai]

I am terribly lucky. I was speaking to a friend of mine who has depression and we came to the conclusion that people just have different "default settings". My default setting is "Happy". That is not to say that certain situations don't make me angry or sad or frustrated, but once I am out of that situation, or it is resolved, I am like a fishing bobber and float right back to the top of the waves.

I have been in emergency medicine for 22 years and am able to compartmentalize it very well. Various bloodied bodies and bad situations have not eaten my brain. I was in a very VERY bad alcoholic relationship (had a shotgun brandished at me one night- thought I was gonna die, was hit a few times, had every thing stolen from me etc) so I have been through the shit, but once I step out of the shit and rinse off, I'm good to go again.

It's nothing that I take any credit for, but I'm certainly thankful for it.

 

[Math242]

i agree with your analysis about different "default settings".

Happy
not giving a fuck
depressed