About 15 or 16 years ago, some friends of mine got into cocaine, and I gave it a try at a party.
I didn't think it was that big of a deal, really. Perked me up a bit. I thought "Wow, this'd be better than coffee in the morning." So I bought a 'sixteenth' (nearly 2 grams) for $40.
I'd get up for work..tired, like most people. Do a little 'bump' (that's cocaine slang) and by the time I got out of the shower, I was wide awake, perky, and ready for the world. I didn't seem to have any crash. I didn't have any cravings to do it more often. I just used it as a morning pick-me-up. $40 worth would last me nearly a month...it was even cheaper than starbucks!
That didn't last, of course. After a while. I'd find myself doing a bump after work because I was tired. After a few weeks of that, I got brave enough to take it with me to work, and I was doing it on my lunch break, too. Then, I was doing it on my smoke breaks--I smoked cigs back then. I even started sneaking bumps at my desk.
If you've ever been around the cocaine culture, you'll be familiar with the 'bullet'..it's a little bullet shaped plastic cocaine delivery system.
http://www.elephantos.com/images/colored cocaine sniff bullet.gif
You put a little cocaine in the glass bottle..maybe a gram or two will fit. It has a tiny knob..you can turn it, get about a line's worth of coke in a little internal cup, and sniff it. Makes portable coke use easy.
I lost the bullet under a co-worker's desk once, while fixing her computer. Totally freaked me out. Luckily, i found it later. You'd think that might have been a wake-up call, but it wasn't, really.
I eventually got to where I was buying an 8-ball (3.5 grams. 1/8 ounce) every 2-3 days. That was at $60 a pop. So, let's say nearly $180 a week, or nearly $10,000 a year. I was only sleeping a couple of hours a night. I lost a job opportunity for failing a drug test. I once woke up with my face lying in a huge pool of blood that had come from my nose. My cocaine using friends were getting into more and more drug culture drama: stealing, kiting checks, etc. I luckily never got into that crowd, and didn't get sucked into that kind of thing. A female friend of mine once told me how awful it was to find herself in the back alley behind a dance club, giving some total stranger a blowjob. But then she brightened and said "Score! Free coke!" Uh, that wasn't free, hon.
I recognized that many of my friend's lives were self destructing faster than mine was, but I saw that I was headed down that same path. So I quit....cold turkey.
It wasn't easy. I would occasionally find white cigarette ash flakes on my desk or around my room, and think "I wonder if that's coke", and snort it. It was pretty pathetic. It took a long time for the cravings to go away. I didn't replace my coke usage with anything else. I stared it down, for a long, long time, until it went away. It was tough as hell.
A few years later, I quit smoking cigs, using the Nicoderm CQ patch. It was a fuckton easier than quitting coke.