Girl Won't Date a Nerd

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Chibibar

Jay said:
Before anything else, that picture.... ouch. Some women do feel entitled for looking mediocre at best.

Can't judge the guy really, good for him for winning millions of dollars and will hopefully put himself out there instead on OKCupid where women peruse the catalog of the penises. Better chances to find someone NORMAL.

Because as much as she wants to sound like she wants to find someone normal, she's one hell of a hypocrite.

What a dumbass.
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What is normal? What people consider normal may consider it odd to them. We play games (at least most of us on the forum does) I'm reaching 40 and still play video games. I buy tons of game on Steam (303 and counting) Is that normal? to my wife it is, but to the "public" maybe not. To my family? nope! (Asian conservative)

Some nerds are eccentric. An Editor for Gizmodo should KNOW that. She is pretty much trying to blast a guy but end up looking like a moron herself.

Heck, try to date other millionaires (the guy is one) they all have their weird eccentric ways.
 
Shegokigo

Shegokigo

Told me he liked Huey Lewis? Strike one
Yelled "Don't just stare at it, eat it" when we were out to dinner? Strike two
Chased me through my apt lobby, naked and swinging around a chainsaw? Strike three
 
Cheesy1

Cheesy1

Shegokigo said:
Told me he liked Huey Lewis? Strike one
Yelled "Don't just stare at it, eat it" when we were out to dinner? Strike two
Chased me through my apt lobby, naked and swinging around a chainsaw? Strike three
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"So you're saying you wouldn't go out with him again?"
 
HoboNinja

HoboNinja

Why was he even on OKCupid in the first place, that place sucks, and so does Plenty of Fish, like I am no macho man stud-muffin but the women on those sites usually make me cringe.

Also sup guys long time no see.
 
Shegokigo

Shegokigo

HoboNinja said:
Why was he even on OKCupid in the first place, that place sucks, and so does Plenty of Fish, like I am no macho man stud-muffin but the women on those sites usually make me cringe.

Also sup guys long time no see.
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I've gotten laid more times than I can count from PoF. I wouldn't rule it out completely. I mean it's completely free and has all the ammenities of a major pay site. At least in my area it had plenty of...... fish. :csi:
 
HoboNinja

HoboNinja

I am pretty sure Iowa is just too full of ugly people.

I dunno though I am getting to the point where I may just check out w4m on craigslist because I suck at talking to random women in public.
 
strawman

strawman

She's bitter because he didn't ask her out for a third date, and now he's the big fish that got away for her.

It's quite a public troll. If she wanted to approach this journalistically she wouldn't have called him out specifically, and would have changed references so readers understood he's a millionaire due to his geeky obsession, but not make it easy for readers to know who and what obsession she was talking about.

She's hurt, not because he wasn't the guy for her, or because the dating site is stupid for not including one's job description (seriously? She didn't see what his job description said?), but because she was rejected, and not just by anyone, but a *geek*.

That's got to hurt, and her answer is to try and hurt back. It backfired quite brilliantly, though.

And the funny thing is that she is likely the kind of girl that would get along better with a geek than with a jock.
 
C

Chibibar

Alyssa Bereznak is making us females look bad. I’m ashamed on behalf of our sex that she said those bitchy things. In her article, she accuses a world champion of Magic: The Gathering of being a liar and a creep. In reality, her predatory and trollish behaviour makes her the creepy one.
First of all, let me say up front that I totally buy the stigma associated with online dating. I know online dating sites like RSVP have been around for yonks now, but I can’t help but think that it’s for desperados — a last resort. Alyssa’s piece about her OKCupid experience serves as a reminder that there’s a good chance you’ll end up wasting your time on someone like her, whose elitist attitude you would have not been interested in from the get-go had you met her in a real-life situation.

Earlier this month, I came home drunk and made an OKCupid profile. What the hell, I thought. I’m busy, I’m single, and everybody’s doing it. Sure, I’d heard horror stories, but what was the worst that could happen?​
The fact that you don’t know when you’ve had too much alcohol already says a lot about you. Any guy will tell you that there’s nothing more unattractive than a drunk girl falling all over the place and having no idea how stupid she looks. The fact that you don’t know your limits when it comes to alcohol — and that you’re using being drunk to justify your actions — doesn’t make you look very credible.
There’s no point wondering what terrible things could have happened. The worst that did happen in this situation was that you joined OKCupid and f**ked with some poor guy’s head and then publicly humiliated him. You talk about OKCupid being like “the online equivalent to hanging out alone in a dark, date-rapey bar”, but you just made yourself out to be the predator. You were obviously desperate enough to continue trolling OKCupid well after you sobered up and realised and you had no legitimate reason for being on there. It’s no wonder men always complain about women playing mind games. You managed to reinforce a stereotype that some of us have worked so hard to disassociate ourselves with.
I’ll readily admit that if he’s anything remotely like how Alyssa described him (which I doubt), I probably wouldn’t be interested in him romantically myself. That doesn’t mean I don’t think he’d be a cool friend to have — the people I hang out with the most are nerds of some kind, but I’m only really sexually attracted to blokey blokes. You know, the manly types that look good without trying too hard and aren’t fussed about having a bit of a belly. In any case, everyone has an ego, and crushing someone’s modest expectations of themselves is unnecessary let alone damaging to the self-esteem.
That’s why I find it so appalling that you laughed when he said he was the world champion of Magic: The Gathering. Why would you do that? Any other person would have been genuinely curious, and I would have been nothing less than excited to learn more about a game I’ve heard so much about, yet know so little of. It’s not easy to be good at something, let alone be the world champion at it.
It really is a shame you forgot to Google him before you had dinner with him. Perhaps then you might have given him the respect that he deserves. I agree that disclosing your marital status and any kids in an online dating profile is mandatory, but calling him a liar for not putting down the fact that he’s a world champion at something is unfair. I call that being modest — a highly desirable attribute, and one that you seem to lack.
As you suggested, being so shallow that you couldn’t see past his world title led you to make the truth look like fiction. If you walked away from the second date thinking that he was nothing more than “a champion dweeb in hedge funder’s clothing”, then that’s your fault. Did you ever stop to think that maybe he was in hedge funder’s clothing because he actually, you know, works for a hedge fund company. I doubt that a guy who’s intelligent enough to be in a job like that is so socially retarded that he’s unable to make conversation about anything other than Magic: The Gathering. And if he was, I’m sure you wouldn’t have hesitated to make a point of it in your slanderous article. Sometimes, guys need to be prodded into speaking about themselves. From what you’ve written, it’s clear that you failed completely at making proper conversation with him.
You not only accuse him of lying in his profile, you also accuse him of “infiltrat[ing] his way into OKCupid dates” with two people you know. Yes, it is strange, which is why I would have gone out of my way to ask him about it rather than make nasty assumptions about him online. You judged him so harshly and publicly without giving concrete reasons as to why we should believe you.
So what can we all learn from Alyssa’s rant? She’s a narcissist who you would probably not want to date, women can be predators online too, and be assured that her experience is the exception rather than the rule.
To the Magic champ: I’d love to hear your side of the story. Dinner?
 
C

Chibibar

Tress said:
He re-posted the article from the link. And he probably should have made that more clear.
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Whoops. that was suppose to include Shego's comment. my bad :)

And no. I'm not a girl, even tho my wife keep saying that I act more girlish and she does.
I like chick flicks and she love zombie horror flicks.
 
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Biannoshufu

from wired

On My Dates With the Hopelessly Mundane Alyssa Bereznak

  • September 1, 2011 |
  • 8:00 am |
  • Categories: People

A littlewhile ago, in a moment of weakness, I made an OkCupid profile. It couldn’t hurt, I thought: I’m busy, I’m single, and most of the women I run into at game nights and cons either are already with someone or not interested in a commitment. Two weeks into the experiment, I was beginning to think OkCupid needed some basic English proficiency tests before letting people sign up. Even the women who managed to produce messages with decent grammar seemed to always write “your” when they meant “you’re” or use “U” in place of “you,” and when they bothered to mention anything about the TV shows, movies, or games I listed as my favorites, it was usually to ask “What about Twilight?” and never to say anything clever like “So say we all!” or “I’ve got two sheep, and I’m looking for a brick.”

So when I got a message from someone named Alyssa that closed with “May the force be with you,” I figured that, even though she hadn’t used a capital ‘F’ she was probably geeky enough to be interesting. I gave her my name and she gave me hers — I Googled her, of course, but all that came up were a few articles on Salon and Gizmodo, which wasn’t much to go on but I figured anyone who wrote for Gizmodo was probably at least interested in technology.

We met for a drink a few days later. She was fairly attractive — not a supermodel, but they’re too thin anyway. We started talking about the usual first date stuff: family, work, college, hobbies. She said she likes to play tennis. I jokingly replied that I prefer Settlers of Catan; she didn’t react to that, just kind of let it go, as though she didn’t know what I was talking about and didn’t care enough to ask.

Somehow we got onto the topic of TV shows we liked that weren’t around any more. I mentioned Firefly, of course, which she clearly didn’t know anything about, so in an effort to describe it I asked if she’d ever watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She said she’d seen an episode or two but really preferred Twilight.

I laughed. That’s really funny, preferring Twilight to Buffy. She had an ironic sense of humor just like me — this was great.

Then I saw the look on her face. She wasn’t kidding. She really did prefer Twilight. Oy.
Well, OK, so her taste in vampire fiction left something to be desired. That was OK, she’d quoted Star Wars to me. So I asked her who her favorite character from the films was. She said maybe the one played by Natalie Portman, but she hadn’t seen any of the movies in years. I asked her why she’d put “May the force be with you” in her message; she admitted it was the only line she remembered from the movies and had put it there hoping I’d think it was funny.

After our first date I thought about it. Shouldn’t you have to mention in your online profile if you’re hopelessly mundane? Whether or not you like Twilight should be one of the first questions on any woman’s profile. I mean, before asking if you have kids. Still, maybe she still had some geeky qualities that just were hidden somehow. It wouldn’t be fair to write her off without making sure.

So we met for dinner, and I got right down to it. What was her favorite board game? “Monopoly.” Strike one. Her favorite nonfiction TV show? “Dancing With the Stars.” Strike two. Her favorite funny t-shirt? “Oh, I don’t like wearing shirts with words on them.” Strike three. It was clear she was just about the most boringly mundane person I’d ever met. I tried to enjoy dinner, but I wasn’t really interested in hearing about how she thought they were going to deal with replacing Charlie Sheen with Ashton Kutcher on Two and a Half Men, so I knew there was no way this was going anywhere.

Geek moms and dads, warn your kids! You’ll think you’ve found someone who can at least tell the different Star Trek series apart, but she’ll turn out to be a mundane who can’t even explain the difference between Star Trek and Star Wars. Someone who doesn’t care that Han shot first. Someone who likes Twilight. So make sure they ask up front. Because some people are just never going to be geeks.

Note: This article is a work of satire and should in no way be construed as a statement of fact. If you’re unaware of the context, this GeekMom article should help.
Twilight image copyright Little, Brown and Company.
Monopoly image copyright Hasbro.
Dancing With the Stars image copyright ABC.

And the man strikes back?
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-501465_162-20100604-501465.html
 
Shegokigo

Shegokigo

Oh that was fantastic. I was hoping it was really a guy that dated her and found out about her idiocy, so he turned it around on her from their date.

Still, I love how much hate this dumb bitch is getting.
 
B

Biannoshufu

Jon Finkel talks to us about Gizmodo's Alyssa Bereznak (a.k.a. mean girl)

By​
Chenda Ngak​
Topics​
Wired for Women​

Jon Finkel picture at the Magic: The Gathering world championship in 2000​
(Credit: YouTube/Alicabob)​
(CBS) - Monday was a crazy day on the East Coast. We were recovering from an earthquake and a hurricane. Many of us couldn't make it into the office on time or at all. It was also the day that Gizmodo intern
Alyssa Bereznak posted an article​

trashing a guy she met on dating site OKCupid.

Gizmodo mean girl bashes OKCupid date for no reason​
He seemed like a nice fellow, except for a few things that did not fit her taste. Top of the list being his accomplishments as a world champion of the collectible card game Magic: The Gathering. Instead of quietly judging him and moving on with her life, she decided to write a post about him and reveal his name on tech blog Gizmodo, which garners 1.8 million unique visitors.​
​
Cards used in the game Magic: The Gathering​
(Credit: Flickr/magoexperto)​

Jon Finkel thought he left his life as a world champion behind him. While he never hid the fact he was a Magic hero of sorts, it was something that happened 10 years ago. He didn't feel it necessary to attach the world champion title to his current accomplishments, which includes being a partner at a hedge fund in New Jersey, FYI.​

When we recounted her post with anger (that's right, we were peeved), it was the end of the day and it seemed like the story would just go away overnight. But, we weren't the only ones who thought Bereznak crossed the line by linking to Finkel's personal information and stepped into cyberbullying territory. The story did not go away. By Tuesday, it had made its rounds, and publications like Forbes and the Washington Post reported it, too.​

The publicity prompted the popular link sharing website Reddit to request that Finkel do an Ask Me Anything (AMA) post, where users ask questions and the subject answers as many as they desire. You'll find the highlights from his AMA at the end of this post.​

We reached out to Finkel and asked him a few questions of our own. He was getting ready for a tournament and was kind enough to give us answers via email.​

Our exclusive Q&A with Jon Finkel​
CN: We noticed that Alyssa's internship ended. If she was fired over the post, do you think it was a fair move by Gizmodo?​
JF: I think it's unlikely. It's the end of the summer so a lot of internships are ending now. I think she alluded to something of the sort when we talked, but I couldn't say for sure.​
CN: We know you felt your privacy was violated. Are there any tips that you'd like to pass on to anyone who might encounter this type of public exposure?​
JF: My main advice would be to have an army of game-loving fans who remember you from your glory days 10 years ago. Probably also, and this is good generic life advice, "try not to be a [jerk]." If she'd posted about me being a real [jerk], things might have developed differently. But I suppose this sort of stuff could happen to anyone with a large enough Google footprint, even if they are a "Grade D Celebrity."​
CN: Do you think you were a victim of cyberbullying?​
JF: I mean not really. 18-year-old Jon might have thought that, especially if it had been a girl that he had been really into, or had left himself vulnerable to, rather than just an uneventful, say goodbye forever kind of date.​
CN: As of today, has she contacted you to apologize?​
JF: Nope.​
CN: On a lighter note. What are you looking for in a woman? Do you have a type?​
JF: I always think people backwards rationalize their lists. My main criterion is, "When I wake up in the morning, do I want to see/call her?" That being said, I think I've devolved my list into two main things that I think everything else follows from: "Self awareness and intellectual curiosity."​
CN: Can you describe what a perfect date might be like?​
JF: Someone smarter than me once said, "All good dates are the same but all bad dates are different." You just know when it's good - the details fade away. Oh, that and Jeffrey Dahmer-based One Man Shows.​
CN: Playboy model Sara Jean Underwood asked you out on "Attack of the Show." Are you going to take the date offer? Ha ha...sorry. I had to ask. I think the entire Internet wants to see that date happen.​
JF: I definitely don't want to let down the Internet. I would definitely be down to go on a date with her, but not if it's televised (sorry everyone). Just not my thing.​
CN: Good luck on your tournament! And have a good holiday weekend.​
JF: Thanks. Here's to hoping I make grandpa proud!​

What does Bereznak and Gawker have to say?​
About an hour after her initial blog post went up, Bereznak was already defending herself. ​
She tweeted, "dudes, i don't think it's bad to be a dweeb. i just dont want to date someone i can't relate to. not an attack. more a cautionary tale."[sic]​

On Wednesday, we learned that her internship at Gizmodo was over when Bereznak tweeted this announcement , "@gizmodo didn't fire me. my internship ended friday. sorry to disappoint you all."[sic]​

We reached out to Gawker Media to see if there were any repercussions and how the company feels about her decision to reveal Finkel's name. They declined to comment.​

Highlights from Jon Finkel's Reddit AMA​
Here are a few of the most pointed questions and answers (edited for grammar).​
What was your first reaction upon reading her post about you? - Scarker​
I felt a little, I dunno, violated. Even though the post itself didn't make me look bad at all (at least I didn't think). Still, it's sort of like someone publishing emails you wrote to your girlfriend, or posting part of your diary - it just feels wrong​
Are you upset that she revealed your identity in the article, or do you think that ultimately this is going to work out for you with the great publicity? - OilGuy13​
It's nice to know the Internet has my back, so in total it looks like it was a net positive, though I still feel oddly creeped out by it.​
How many girls have asked you out since this all exploded? I noticed Felicia Day in your Twitter; did she say something to you? - kbilly​
If you include Twitter messages from other continents saying 'Id date you', then a lot. As for Felicia Day, it appears she made a tweet or two about it, but I don't really know much about her, except that she seems like a lovely woman who is apparently loved by gamers.​
Did she tell you she was a blogger? Did she hint maybe she would post about the date? - sweetgreggo​
Yes and No.​
Did Gizmodo contact you at all about disclosing your name? - clifwith1f​
Nope, although it looks like one of their editors just sent me an email 15 minutes ago, but I haven't really had time to sift through all my emails. This is already cutting into valuable [Pro Tour] Philly test time - which is the initial reason I took off work today.​

What can you do if you've been bashed publicly?​
We asked clinical psychologist Dr. Leah Lagos, Psy.D, to advise anyone who has experienced a public bashing and violation of privacy.​
"Online dating, particularly for men, can test their self-esteem. Because it's often the men who do the asking it is often the men who are more vulnerable to rejection. The key here is to remain detached from the outcome," Dr. Lagos stated. "Strong emotional reactions on a first date, like love or hate, are likely to reflect the most about the person experiencing them. People sometimes forget that making oneself vulnerable is an inherently anxiety provoking experience."​
This is typically a non-news item, except for the fact that it addresses social etiquette in an ever-evolving online culture. We have a responsibility to point out a line when it's been crossed.​
 
Tress

Tress

What I can't get over is how a soon-to-be-unemployed intern for a tech blog decided that her shit doesn't stink, while thinking it was a good idea to bash a millionaire hedge-fund partner based solely on the fact that he used to be a world champion at a card game.
 
C

Chibibar

He seems pretty cool about it (I guess you have to be when you are champion. I can imagine the stress in some of those games)

I think the story did give him positive exposure (unintentional) but really ruin Alyssa's rep tho. It is like Alexander Wallace ruining her rep :)
Added at: 16:13
Tress said:
What I can't get over is how a soon-to-be-unemployed intern for a tech blog decided that her shit doesn't stink, while thinking it was a good idea to bash a millionaire hedge-fund partner based solely on the fact that he used to be a world champion at a card game.
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Either way, with the way of the internet and people google/facebook check on potential worker, she is in a world of hurt in her future.
 
fade

fade

Staff member
Wow. I read those articles, and I can't decide who is the bigger douche: the mundane vindictive bitch, or the whiny, pseudo-intellectual elistist prick?
Added at: 02:03
I mean, he whines about her crowd-following, and then he hits every cliquish geek highlight in his letter. It's like a goth kid crying about conformity while wearing the same thing all goth kids wear.
 
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