AMA/Journey

Bubble181

Bubble181

Does your wife know about what you spoilered? Is she accepting? If not, do you intend to talk to her about it before buying a house or other such big steps together?
I mean, you could certainly continue to hide it, but I'd wager that's not what's healthy or good for you in the long run (even if you might consider the opposite as selfish right now)...But that might be worse/more selfish in the long run if the spoilered thing comes out eventually, or drives you into despair/depression/loneliness.
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

Bubble181 said:
Does your wife know about what you spoilered? Is she accepting? If not, do you intend to talk to her about it before buying a house or other such big steps together?
I mean, you could certainly continue to hide it, but I'd wager that's not what's healthy or good for you in the long run (even if you might consider the opposite as selfish right now)...But that might be worse/more selfish in the long run if the spoilered thing comes out eventually, or drives you into despair/depression/loneliness.
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She knows and has been supremely supportive. I wish I had told her sooner than I did, actualy, but not obsessing over "should have, would have" situations is also part of therapy, one that'll be more difficult to tackle than opening up. I'm working on that one, too. She did come to wonder at a point, and one day started rattling off a few situations from our time living together, and then asked me. I wonder if I ever would've told her, but she's a perceptive person. Sometimes I feel like she probably knew something was off from the get-go. She used to say "I didn't know there were guys like you." Yeah, funny that ...

LittleKagsin said:
What's something you're incredibly proud of?

Spicy food opinions?

What were you like as a kid - adventurous, studious, imaginative, athletic, etc etc?
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I'm proud of finishing four books--would be prouder if I could get one published, but that's its own thing :p. I'm proud of getting my wife out of her hellish abusive household back when we were engaged. I'm proud of helping my cousins grow up to be weirdos. I think they would've been anyway, but I'm definitely taking some credit.

I love spicy food.

It does not love me. As you can imagine, there are some conflicts. :/

As a kid, I was annoyingly imaginative. I wasn't outwardly adventurous, but all kinds of things were happening in my head, and I'd yammer about made-up crap constantly, or draw it everywhere.
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

I guess I'm not totally sure how to answer that because deep down I'm just me. Im still breaking down personality boundaries I've established and maintained for years. The big thing is to continue learning to be comfortable with myself and then her, because I'm still in the mode of seeing being myself as "slipping," and then telling myself to knock it off and act like society's idea of male or my family expectations of me. I'm already "the weird one" after all.

But something I was reminded of when looking at a picture she drew for me years ago. We wrote our own wedding vows, and mine were about us coming from two different roads that joined. The picture is us on that road and written it says "I will be by your side, all the way." So each step I learn to be okay with myself enough to bring her onboard to that step, I know shell be there with me.
 
PatrThom

PatrThom

I feel like the spoiler stuff is happening among our forum members at a disproportionately higher rate than the rest of the populace.
That said, we've all been through this before, so you know how we're probably going to react.
To that end and with that in mind, I'm going to ask what I feel like will be the hardest question to answer*: Are you sure?

--Patrick
*hardest because you're going to answer it here, but then you're going to answer it again and again as time goes on...to yourself, to others, to yourself again, etc.
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

PatrThom said:
I feel like the spoiler stuff is happening among our forum members at a disproportionately higher rate than the rest of the populace.
That said, we've all been through this before, so you know how we're probably going to react.
To that end and with that in mind, I'm going to ask what I feel like will be the hardest question to answer*: Are you sure?

--Patrick
*hardest because you're going to answer it here, but then you're going to answer it again and again as time goes on...to yourself, to others, to yourself again, etc.
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The advice my therapist gave me was to avoid mentioning it until I knew what I wanted. The idea crossed my mind of, if I could just shut all that off, would I? And the answer is that I want to be who I am, not the presentation. It's dealing with the rest of the world that's hard about it. I've felt it's selfish to even consider because I am pretty much my wife's caretaker at times and if something happened to me, I don't know who would step in to help her. But, anything can happen to anyone, anywhere, and everything is statistics.

So short answer, am I sure on what I want? Yes, I'm sure. Financially, family, friends, etc. am I sure what's going to happen? No. But no one is. Maybe in three years I'll be renewing vows with my wife for our 10th anniversary, this time as wife and wife, and maybe we'll have a house and I'll be writing full-time, and maybe my family will visit and I'll actually have rooms for them to stay in. Or, maybe they'll want nothing to do with me anymore. Maybe I'll still be at my current job, which I like anyway, where my wife works and I might not have made as much progress as I want physically, or maybe no progress, and we'll still be in this apartment. Or some mix of any of those elements.

Right now, step one is getting over these fears, inhibitions, self-censorship, dishonesty, and so on. Right now I need to learn that it's okay to be myself.
 
HCGLNS

HCGLNS

How do you remember NorthRanger?

Which Halforumites would you like to meet?

How much can you drink?

How do you like to eat steak?

If a ball and glove cost $25 dollars and the glove costs $10 more than the ball, how much does the ball cost?

What would Michelangelo make with a 3d printer?

Why are you a Dallas Cowboys fan?
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

HCGLNS said:
How do you remember NorthRanger?

Which Halforumites would you like to meet?

How much can you drink?

How do you like to eat steak?

If a ball and glove cost $25 dollars and the glove costs $10 more than the ball, how much does the ball cost?

What would Michelangelo make with a 3d printer?

Why are you a Dallas Cowboys fan?
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Okay, now that I can get to my computer again ...

I honestly didn't have a lot of interaction with North, but I read his posts with you guys, so I remember him in part as a mod who kept the peace and also as someone who had a good heart. I only vaguely understood he had cancer when he passed away.

In all honesty again, I'm apprehensive of meeting anyone, but hopefully down the road and with improvement, I won't feel like that anymore.

I have no idea how much I can drink since I don't drink. Mom being an alcoholic kinda soured the whole thing for me, and my wife's father also being an alcoholic did the same for her, so we've made it a rule of no alcohol in our home.

My steak? That's too personal. On this forum.

$7.50

New nunchucks.

I never even knew what qualified as a touchdown until I started playing Blood Bowl this week :p.

Dei said:
Who is your one true Persona waifu?
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Um ... probably Chie. She's tough, hilarious, and loves meat, which I can relate to. I don't get why some people dislike her; I think her attitude is perfect.
 
PatrThom

PatrThom

Zero Esc said:
am I sure on what I want? Yes, I'm sure.
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This is the question I was looking to have answered. You can’t ever be sure about “The Future” because it is a vast unknown, and is influenced by too many factors (and too many other people) to waste time worrying about now.

My question was more trying to find out whether you still had any doubt as to your “true” identity. Because if you’re someone who does have doubts, who’s not sure, then you should definitely NOT be wasting time talking about transition.

—Patrick
 
Celt Z

Celt Z

I realize that the only questions I could think of were answered already.

So,ummmmmm... How's your day been?



(Also, big hugs for everything you're going through and I hope the end results are the ones you want, not the ones you dread.)
 
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Denbrought

Denbrought

In the spirit of slightly private but not horribly so questions, what brands/types of soap do you use in the shower? Preferred water temperature?

Assuming you like and eat eggs, how do you like them cooked best?
 
Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

Is there anything you were hoping someone would ask, because you'd really like to share but haven't felt you had a reason to?
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

Celt Z said:
I realize that the only questions I could think of were answered already.

So,ummmmmm... How's your day been?



(Also, big hugs for everything you're going through and I hope the end results are the ones you want, not than the ones you dread.)
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Thanks! I ended up staying home today because of bad chili, but I got a lot of cleaning done and finally moved all my wife's files from her old computer to her current computer. I also decided we didn't need the kitchen island as our junk heap and turned it into her tea station so she can use her tea stuff more easily. She was really excited to see it. I figure, the more we have organized now, the easier the move will be.

Denbrought said:
In the spirit of slightly private but not horribly so questions, what brands/types of soap do you use in the shower? Preferred water temperature?

Assuming you like and eat eggs, how do you like them cooked best?
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St. Ives body wash and super hot water.

I used to like eggs, but much like spicy food, they no longer like me.[DOUBLEPOST=1516066443,1516066348][/DOUBLEPOST]
drifter said:
What is your least favorite flavor of ice cream?
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Coffee. I'm sure there are ones worse that I haven't tasted though.

Ravenpoe said:
Is there anything you were hoping someone would ask, because you'd really like to share but haven't felt you had a reason to?
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I was kinda dreading anyone asking anything, so not really. But it has gotten easier answering questions as the thread goes on.
 
HCGLNS

HCGLNS

What songs do you like to sing?

Are you allergic to wool?

Are you symmetrical?

Can you light a campfire?

How many blankets do you own?

What new skill would you like to learn?

What hairstyle do you want your wife to wear?

If you could guest star in a Groo comic book, would you be a wizard?
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

HCGLNS said:
What songs do you like to sing?

Are you allergic to wool?

Are you symmetrical?

Can you light a campfire?

How many blankets do you own?

What new skill would you like to learn?

What hairstyle do you want your wife to wear?

If you could guest star in a Groo comic book, would you be a wizard?
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Postmodern Jukebox lately, since now I can understand the words to popular music. Before getting into that, whatever I could remember words to, or just humming movie/video game scores.

I don't think I'm allergic to wool.

No, not symmetrical.

I can light a campfire, sure! Just give me some gas.

I have one blanket. My wife and I together? No idea, there are too many.

A new skill ... it's been so long since I was drawing my webcomic, I'd like to get back to some form of regularity. Unfortunately I haven't been organizing my time very well and the free time I have for working on stuff has gone to writing-related work.

Everybody should wear their hair the way they like. I don't have a preferred hairstyle for her; her hair is wild and cute and curly as it is.

I don't know what Groo is, but only a fool would turn down being fictionally depicted as a wizard.

WasabiPoptart said:
What is the best memory of any point in your life?
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I'm not sure. The last couple years of college were wonderful. Our honeymoon was a dream come true.

PatrThom said:
Are you getting tired of HCGLNS' questions yet?

Are you wondering why GasBandit hasn't joined yet?

--Patrick
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Oh, let him have his fun. My attendance here is going to have to drop like it normally does since I'm going to work today, so he might have to sit at the floor of no answers for a while.

Nope, everyone has their own life.
 
Dave

Dave

Staff member
Now that we've gone this far I just want to say that SNL's Celebrity Jeopardy has ruined me. The first time I saw this thread I giggled (mostly because I'm a terrible person).
 
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