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Chazwozel
What the fuck? Are you 80 years old with hemorrhoids?
Do you stand or sit when you wipe?
- Thread starter Charlie Don't Surf
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What the fuck? Are you 80 years old with hemorrhoids?
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Chazwozel
Okay don't get me wrong, for the last 'wipe', they'd certainly be nice. The only problem I see is taking a shit at work/bus station/ traveling etc... Your ass gets used to the nice moist tissue at the end of the wipe. You'd feel dirty without it. I'm not packing wet wipes in a diaper bag for myself!
Don't make me come up with examples where this is wrong!
How the hell do people stand and then wipe? What if you have a hanger? That left over hunk of crap would.... ugh, I've said way too much.
Okay don't get me wrong, for the last 'wipe', they'd certainly be nice. The only problem I see is taking a shit at work/bus station/ traveling etc... Your ass gets used to the nice moist tissue at the end of the wipe. You'd feel dirty without it. I'm not packing wet wipes in a diaper bag for myself!
[/QUOTE]No, you're very right about that last part. I don't carry them with me, I just can't wait to get home and do it properly.
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Chazwozel
While I don't use these I'd have to agree that they'd be the best for cleanups.
Water is nature's solvent for a reason, people.
Imagine you dropped a sticky, melty chocolate bar on the floor. You grab a dry paper towel and wipe-- all it does it smear everywhere. Do you keep wiping with the dry towel? No, YOU GET A DAMN WET ONE.
I feel like the only reason the world uses toilet paper is because it's more economical. Wet wipes would be clearly superior.[/QUOTE]
What the hell do you eat that all your shits are melty chocolate consistency? If I'm healthy and 100%, I take about 4-5 shits a day which are 2-3 wipers at the most.
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Chazwozel
So's my wife. I think women in general shit a whole lot less then men do. It used to be like 2x a day for me until my doctors jacked up my thyroid a couple months ago. My metabolism is so much faster now that I dropped like 18 lbs and eat like a horse.
As I said before, I'm a stander with immaculate underwear afterwards. It's not rocket science!
Also whoever tagged the thread "when can I shit that", bravo.
Also whoever tagged the thread "when can I shit that", bravo.
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Armadillo
While I don't use these I'd have to agree that they'd be the best for cleanups.
Water is nature's solvent for a reason, people.
Imagine you dropped a sticky, melty chocolate bar on the floor. You grab a dry paper towel and wipe-- all it does it smear everywhere. Do you keep wiping with the dry towel? No, YOU GET A DAMN WET ONE.
I feel like the only reason the world uses toilet paper is because it's more economical. Wet wipes would be clearly superior.[/QUOTE]
What the hell do you eat that all your shits are melty chocolate consistency? If I'm healthy and 100%, I take about 4-5 shits a day which are 2-3 wipers at the most.[/QUOTE]
4-5 times a day? Your balloon knot must be chafed to hell! You know what would help that? Wet wipes.
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Chazwozel
While I don't use these I'd have to agree that they'd be the best for cleanups.
Water is nature's solvent for a reason, people.
Imagine you dropped a sticky, melty chocolate bar on the floor. You grab a dry paper towel and wipe-- all it does it smear everywhere. Do you keep wiping with the dry towel? No, YOU GET A DAMN WET ONE.
I feel like the only reason the world uses toilet paper is because it's more economical. Wet wipes would be clearly superior.[/quote]
What the hell do you eat that all your shits are melty chocolate consistency? If I'm healthy and 100%, I take about 4-5 shits a day which are 2-3 wipers at the most.[/quote]
4-5 times a day? Your balloon knot must be chafed to hell! You know what would help that? Wet wipes.
[/QUOTE]Nah, I'm good. Like I said most are 2-3 wipes and good to go. The secret is not to pinch the loaf too early, grasshopper.
I... I really didn't even know this was a thing. Sit. I can't wrap my brain around standing to do it. And I'm not willing to try.
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Chazwozel
Fuck all y'all.
Where are my fellow carpet scooters at?
Where are my fellow carpet scooters at?
A
Armadillo
You've never heard that one?
doomdragon6
Staff member
While I don't use these I'd have to agree that they'd be the best for cleanups.
Water is nature's solvent for a reason, people.
Imagine you dropped a sticky, melty chocolate bar on the floor. You grab a dry paper towel and wipe-- all it does it smear everywhere. Do you keep wiping with the dry towel? No, YOU GET A DAMN WET ONE.
I feel like the only reason the world uses toilet paper is because it's more economical. Wet wipes would be clearly superior.[/quote]
What the hell do you eat that all your shits are melty chocolate consistency? If I'm healthy and 100%, I take about 4-5 shits a day which are 2-3 wipers at the most.[/QUOTE]
4-5 times a day?? Fuck, dude!
I'm like once every two days at most.
NEITHER... because i don't sit on the toilet, i stand on my feet and crouch, like nature intended...
Preach it sister... one day the heretics will be made to see the light or be flushed away by the fury of the Great Wipe Maker in the sky...
Preach it sister... one day the heretics will be made to see the light or be flushed away by the fury of the Great Wipe Maker in the sky...
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Chazwozel
While I don't use these I'd have to agree that they'd be the best for cleanups.
Water is nature's solvent for a reason, people.
Imagine you dropped a sticky, melty chocolate bar on the floor. You grab a dry paper towel and wipe-- all it does it smear everywhere. Do you keep wiping with the dry towel? No, YOU GET A DAMN WET ONE.
I feel like the only reason the world uses toilet paper is because it's more economical. Wet wipes would be clearly superior.[/quote]
What the hell do you eat that all your shits are melty chocolate consistency? If I'm healthy and 100%, I take about 4-5 shits a day which are 2-3 wipers at the most.[/quote]
4-5 times a day?? Fuck, dude!
I'm like once every two days at most.[/QUOTE]
Eat more fiber.
North_Ranger
Staff member
Sit and tilt. Easier access to the wrinkly winkle. Since I come from a hairy family I want to be extra certain there's no... ummm... surprises in my ass hair.
As for wiping material: two-ply toilet paper, two pieces, folded once. Three pieces, folded twice if 'extra juicy' or if it's some crappy, cheap-o toilet paper some people use. Seriously, that's the worst kind of toilet paper. I'm pulling out curl straps out of my ass hair for a day...
As for wiping material: two-ply toilet paper, two pieces, folded once. Three pieces, folded twice if 'extra juicy' or if it's some crappy, cheap-o toilet paper some people use. Seriously, that's the worst kind of toilet paper. I'm pulling out curl straps out of my ass hair for a day...
Eat more fiber.[/QUOTE]
By the bucket full if you do it 4-5 times a day...
What do you do when you get John Wayne toilet paper?
Dave
Staff member
Okay, I just went to the little old man's room and actually had to sit. While I was doing it I had the opportunity to think about this on a more clinical level.
I see the benefits of being able to stand while wiping. For one thing, if the toilet is auto flush, standing stops the inevitable backwash of the flush from burbling back up onto your freshly wiped hind parts. I hate that.
The problem that I see is that without much practice it would be difficult to get all the dangly bits, especially if you are particularly hairy. Also, there are times that the event is...less than solid. Wouldn't that follow gravity and trek down your leg?
I sit. I'm going to keep on sitting. Standing is just too much work.
I see the benefits of being able to stand while wiping. For one thing, if the toilet is auto flush, standing stops the inevitable backwash of the flush from burbling back up onto your freshly wiped hind parts. I hate that.
The problem that I see is that without much practice it would be difficult to get all the dangly bits, especially if you are particularly hairy. Also, there are times that the event is...less than solid. Wouldn't that follow gravity and trek down your leg?
I sit. I'm going to keep on sitting. Standing is just too much work.
I got introduced to flush-able wipes back when they started making them for babies, but before they started packaging them for everyday use. I used to buy them and use them long after my son was potty trained..
Count me in as someone who doesn't get the sit & wipe logistics. I lift a few inches off the seat, which I guess is a high squat (or sitting with no seat contact, if you prefer). Are you sitters really picturing someone standing straight up and wiping? That's dumb.
If I don't go 2x a day or so, I know my diet is crap. Eat your veggies, people.
If I don't go 2x a day or so, I know my diet is crap. Eat your veggies, people.
doomdragon6
Staff member
If it's less than solid, you really shouldn't be standing up anyway if it's still leaking out. =P
You people seem to thing that any leftover doo-doo is gonna fall. If you're actually DONE POOPING this isn't going to happen. =P
North_Ranger
Staff member
Dave, you mentioned the dangly bits as well. Does that mean you also wipe the balls or is your arsehole... umm... uhhh... I don't think I even want to imagine what would make that "dangly".
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Wasabi Poptart
So's my wife. I think women in general shit a whole lot less then men do. It used to be like 2x a day for me until my doctors jacked up my thyroid a couple months ago. My metabolism is so much faster now that I dropped like 18 lbs and eat like a horse.[/QUOTE]
I usually go once or twice a day. Any less than that and I'm - uncomfortable.
Dave
Staff member
Sometimes this forum is pure (brown?) gold.
I'm a sitter. I love the wet wipes. I've never felt cleaner. I used to hide them in my bathroom so visitors wouldn't see them but now I proudly display them (but still leave a roll of the archaic stuff for people) on my bathroom counter and refuse to be given any (shit?) grief about them.
The thing I can't get past is this whole reaching back thing. WTF? You reach around your body? I just spread my legs, reach down between them and give a good (wet) wiping. WTF people?? Reach around?
So's my wife. I think women in general shit a whole lot less then men do. It used to be like 2x a day for me until my doctors jacked up my thyroid a couple months ago. My metabolism is so much faster now that I dropped like 18 lbs and eat like a horse.[/QUOTE]
I usually go once or twice a day. Any less than that and I'm - uncomfortable.[/QUOTE]
How often do you eat?
T
Twitch
I sit and typically go once every day or two. I find most people though can wait longer than they think, particularly anyone who camps. These people will go three days without blinking an eye.
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