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Foreshadowing death or just pointless thoughts?

Sep 28, 2009#1

Shegokigo

So I'm at my niece's b-day party on Saturday night, immediately greeted by about 20 cars in my brother's parking garage area and already about 20+ people outside. We go inside to say hi, and there's another 20+ people inside. I'm looking around, and of all the b-day parties that year (my gf's sister or her brother's kids, co-worker's kids, etc) none of them even had half that kind of turn out.

To say she's "loved by all" is an understatement. On top of that, she's gorgeous, just downright amazingly beautiful girl (she's 4) that could put beauty pagent girls to shame. Just to add the cherry to the top of the sundae, she's extremely smart, I mean, she talks like a teenager at times with her vocabulary, she's profecient enough to use their computer to go to PBS kids etc. She blows her teachers away with her total grasp on everything they throw at her.

What's my point? She's going to die. She's going to die soon. Why? Because she's just that type of little girl/kid you hear about dying tragically. "Oh she was loved by everyone, she loved everyone, she was so beautiful and smart." Those words were the only things I could hear in my head the entire afternoon at that party. Is this foreshadowing or am I just being my usual self lost in my own thoughts? I can't imagine it being the second, as I wouldn't exactly get much out of it.

Sep 28, 2009#2

Tinwhistler

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

So, you don't know for sure she's going to die? You just imagine she will because she's 'loved by all'?

I don't think there's any kind of mystical karma that says that just because someone has a good home life they automatically get entered into some kind of karmic death pool.

Sep 28, 2009#3

Thread Necromancer

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

See now here I was actually worried and concerned. Afraid that there was an actual illness or something.

Rest assured Shego, you are just being your usual morbid self. But what you don't realize is that everyone who is close to a child has these fears and thoughts. They worry us, sometimes I even loose sleep over the idea that it could happen. But unless you've got something solid to base your worries on, then you are only doing just that. Worrying.

She's ok. You're ok. Now don't pay any more attention to the man behind the curtain.

Sep 28, 2009#4

Iaculus

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

I suspect that you're just being paranoid, to be honest. In fact, that sort of pressing worry sounds kind of parental, if you don't mind me saying so - assuming you're worried about the idea, that is. Sounds like she's a good kid - I'd advise enjoying the time you've got with her instead of worrying about it stopping abruptly.

Unless, of course, that creepy uncle with the windowless van and the cupboard full of firearms kept inviting her to sit on his knee. That may present a problem.

Sep 28, 2009#5

Shegokigo

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Tinwhistler said:
So, you don't know for sure she's going to die? You just imagine she will because she's 'loved by all'?

I don't think there's any kind of mystical karma that says that just because someone has a good home life they automatically get entered into some kind of karmic death pool.

It's not just a good home life or loved by all. It's almost an eerie complete package/too good for this world vibe she gives off.

Sep 28, 2009#6

Kitty Sinatra

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

It's the second

or . . . are you planning something?

Sep 28, 2009#7

Hylian

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Maybe you should maim her just to be safe?

Sep 28, 2009#8

Espy

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Good lord I thought this was going to be about cancer or something.

Sep 28, 2009#9

Andromache

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Espy said:
Good lord I thought this was going to be about cancer or something.

seriously. Fucksake shego, leave the poor kid alone and let her enjoy life. damn.

Sep 28, 2009#10

klew

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Then niece needs food, badly.

Sep 28, 2009#11

Chazwozel

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Oh fuck you Sheg. I was expecting to hear something about leukemia or another type of terminal disease, ready to give my condolences, and feeling sorry for a poor little girl that has it, and it just turns out to be you being a fucking idiot.

Piss off.

Sep 28, 2009#12

Shegokigo

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

I was being serious. :eek:

rly:

It really wouldn't let me "think" the entire time we were there, the nagging feeling that I'd "seen/heard all this before".

Sep 28, 2009#13

phil

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

It's just that she's so young which makes her seem too good to last. At 4 it's easy to to look good, be smart and well behaved. This is twice as true when it's the 4 year old's birthday, and the 4 year old is related to you.

Sep 28, 2009#14

Espy

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Well then, does she hang out with JonBenét Ramsey's parents?

Sep 28, 2009#15

Hylian

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

I think if anything it is the fact that you care about your niece and so whether you want to are not you imagine what could happen to her even if it isn't what is going to happen.

Sep 28, 2009#16

Andromache

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Shegokigo said:
I was being serious. rly:

It really wouldn't let me think the entire time we were there, the nagging feeling that I'd "seen/heard all this before".

Sep 28, 2009#17

Kitty Sinatra

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Shegokigo said:
I was being serious. rly:

It really wouldn't let me think the entire time we were there, the nagging feeling that I'd "seen/heard all this before".

As others said here, you're feeling a sort of parental anxiety.

Even though you think this concern of yours is logically valid, it's not. The responses here should help you realize that your concern is not realistic. Again, though, the anxiety is normal. If however, you keep feeling yourself plagued by thoughts like this, you need to talk them over with someone more experienced and educated in therapy than anyone here on halforums.

That is, excessive anxiety is something that therapy can help.

Your niece is not going to die..

Sep 28, 2009#18

Hylian

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Gruebeard said:
Your niece is not going to die..

Sep 28, 2009#19

Shegokigo

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Oh and I seem to be hearing alot of the same, so let me clear this up. "I'm not worried" as in "I care so much about her".

I simply see a case of "too good to be true" kind of thing going on. I can see your point Phil too, but understand, this is a completely unbiased view on this kid. She really is alot brighter than most of the stars out there, in every way possible.

Crone said:
so was chaz actually. don't worry about nonexistent problems just because you think the world is doom and gloom. Not everyone has a crappy childhood lacking in love you know. You have your own problems, and adding nonexistent worry to them is stupid.

No, Chaz was acting like I was talking about eating her or skinning her alive just to see her bleed. As far as the rest of your statement. "Not everyone has a crappy childhood lacking in love" huh? Who said anything about that?

Sep 28, 2009#20

Chazwozel

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Crone;264003][quote=Shegokigo said:
I was being serious. rly:

It really wouldn't let me think the entire time we were there, the nagging feeling that I'd "seen/heard all this before".

so was chaz actually. don't worry about nonexistent problems just because you think the world is doom and gloom. Not everyone has a crappy childhood lacking in love you know. You have your own problems, and adding nonexistent worry to them is stupid.[/QUOTE]

I just got pissed because I see kids with terminal illnesses on a daily basis (they're patients for several of our novel research studies). I interview their parents and the kids to see if they're right for specific drug treatments that my company is in the process of developing. These kids problems are real. Just because Sheg's niece has a good life doesn't mean she's going to have something bad happen, nor deserves it on some bullshit idea of karmic balance. None of these kids I see deserve the shit they go through either, but they have it. It was the thread title that threw me off guard. I was expecting a story about how her niece has a terminal disease, and it's just Shego being an idiot.

Sep 28, 2009#21

Shawn

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

I always had a bunch of people at my parties. Then I grew up and they stopped giving a shit.

Sep 28, 2009#22

Chazwozel

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Shegokigo said:
Oh and I seem to be hearing alot of the same, so let me clear this up. "I'm not worried" as in "I care so much about her".

I simply see a case of "too good to be true" kind of thing going on. I can see your point Phil too, but understand, this is a completely unbiased view on this kid. She really is alot brighter than most of the stars out there, in every way possible.

Crone said:

so was chaz actually. don't worry about nonexistent problems just because you think the world is doom and gloom. Not everyone has a crappy childhood lacking in love you know. You have your own problems, and adding nonexistent worry to them is stupid.

Click to expand...

No, Chaz was acting like I was talking about eating her or skinning her alive just to see her bleed. As far as the rest of your statement. "Not everyone has a crappy childhood lacking in love" huh? Who said anything about that?

No, I was acting like saying , 'you're a fucking idiot'. I don't recall mentioning eating or skinning...?

Sep 28, 2009#23

Shegokigo

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Chazwozel said:
and it's just Shego being an idiot.

Sep 28, 2009#24

Rob King

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

"They lied when they say the good die young."

Also. Stop scaring us forumites.

Sep 28, 2009#25

Chazwozel

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Shegokigo;264021][quote=Chazwozel said:
and it's just Shego being an idiot.

Again, this was not a case of my "usual train of thought". I wasn't sitting there entertaining ideas on which body part I should mail to my brother first.

I was just... I don't know how to describe it. I felt like something was "there". Something that just was "wrong" about being too "right". That's all it was Chaz. Seriously.[/QUOTE]

Fine.

Your niece will die a terrible, terrible death.

Next...

If you actually believe in premonitions and psychic mumbo-jumbo then I feel sorry for you.

Sep 28, 2009#26

Shegokigo

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Oh for fucks...

Look, it seems the issue everyone is having is the title, I'll change it.

Thanks for being YOUR usual self Chaz.

(Would a mod change the title to "Foreshadowing death or just pointless thoughts?")

Sep 28, 2009#27

Kitty Sinatra

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Thanks Chaz.

Sep 28, 2009#28

kaykordeath

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

I definitely understand the difference between your normal violent thoughts and the "fear" of losing her, but in this case, I think it's just unfounded paranoia.

Believe it or not, there are just lucky fortunate happy people out there who DO seem to have an easier time holding onto said happiness.

Sep 28, 2009#29

Kitty Sinatra

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Oh dear god, I just read the one tag for this thread.

"Chazzhattery" has gotta be added to the wiki.

Sep 28, 2009#30

Shegokigo

My Niece Is Going To Die. Soon Probably.

Honestly? I can see her living a fulfilling life kaykordeath, I'd even be willing to go as far as hurt people who would hurt her in her life. Mostly due to the fact that she's my brother's daughter and she's an extension of him.

Sep 28, 2009#31

lafftaff

People just worry about the ones they love. However, just because she is loved & has a good life doesn't mean she is destined to die young. Plenty of people have it good and live great, long lives.

Now stop getting us all worried.

Sep 28, 2009#32

Shegokigo

Title changed lafftaff. The key here though is, I wasn't "worrying" about someone I "love". I was just making an unbiased observation/thought.

Had it been someone I cared about, then yeah, I could see where everyone is coming from with the "You're just worrying about her".

Sep 28, 2009#33

Rob King

Shegokigo said:
Title changed lafftaff. The key here though is, I wasn't "worrying" about someone I "love". I was just making an unbiased observation/thought.

Had it been someone I cared about, then yeah, I could see where everyone is coming from with the "You're just worrying about her".

This post is completely at odds with what you said before.

Do you or do you not care about your niece. Even if you can explain it away as a result of your love for your brother, there's a paternal instinct there. And that doesn't come without familial concern.

Sep 28, 2009#34

Shannow

This entire thread:

Sep 28, 2009#35

AshburnerX

I wouldn't worry to much about it... I mean if life were truly driven by Tropes and Cliches, I'd have come up with some kind of amazing invention after my numerous bouts with depression and become a millionaire by now. But then again, I could just be Wrong Genre Savvy.

So yeah, don't worry too much about it.

Sep 28, 2009#36

Shegokigo

Rob King said:
This post is completely at odds with what you said before.

Do you or do you not care about your niece. Even if you can explain it away as a result of your love for your brother, there's a paternal instinct there. And that doesn't come without familial concern.

I... both? Hm.

There's no attachment there, directly anyway. I see her as I see any other child walking around the world, though she gets different treatment from me, on a mental/consious level anyway, due to the fact that she is my brother's daughter. If anything were to happen to her, it'd hurt him, and in that sense, I'd try and prevent that.

That help or did I make things more convoluted?

Oh, and thanks for chiming in Shannow.

Sep 28, 2009#37

strawman

You went to a party in a particularly interesting mood, and you saw happiness, and filtered through your life experience you could only feel a sense of loss.

If I were writing a book and you were one of my main characters, then the reason they would feel that way is because they actively mourning the loss/death of their own childhood. They are seeing and truly understanding for the first time exactly what they didn't have, and while they are projecting it on the real child, it is merely an embodiment of their own inner child. At 4 years old they are seeing the child as a real human being - the child has ideas, thoughts, etc that are independent from their parents. No longer babies or toddlers the child is a self-aware human being. Someone with whom they can have a conversation. Which may be why they haven't felt this way before when visiting her, in addition to the huge party.

But I'm not even a writer, nevermind a psychologist.

Still, rather than rejecting it as pointless thoughts, consider it further and see if there's something there that you might want to re-evaluate in your own life. You can't go around experiencing all the love and happiness in the world as dark foreboding shadows - it's not healthy (mentally) and to some degree it's anti-social - you may choose to avoid situations and people that might bring on these morose feelings.

Generally such feelings are important, but they are important in telling you something about yourself, not in telling you something important about someone else.

-Adam

Sep 28, 2009#38

Kitty Sinatra

Shannow said:
My entire life:

Sep 28, 2009#39

Shannow

Gruebeard;264085][quote=Shannow said:
My entire life:

[/QUOTE]

Well, at some point a choice or two brought me here, so sure, why not. :suicide:

Sep 28, 2009#40

Kitty Sinatra

Crap, Shannow. You make a really good point.

Sep 28, 2009#41

Rob King

YAAAY! Suicide cult time!

Sep 28, 2009#42

Shegokigo

Well, for starters, thanks for the really interesting thought process there Steinman, I did stop and "hmmmmm" after reading it. Couple of points though:

I actually had a very full and "loving" childhood, at least until I was 15. So my early years are pretty typical of the "well off, religious family, youngest child" life.

For your second half though, I don't really value love and happiness as things in my life as I just don't have much grasp on either one. It's more of a "put up with and accept things the way they are and enjoy them for however long they last" outlook. As for anti-social? That's pretty much the nail on the head, but I prefer it that way. I currently work in an extremely face-to-face enviroment and would give anything for a cubicle where the only thing I look at everyday is a stack of paperwork and a monitor.

Sep 28, 2009#43

Andromache

Shegokigo said:
I actually had a very full and "loving" childhood, at least until I was 15. So my early years are pretty typical of the "well off, religious family, youngest child" life.

how does any of that translate into loving?

Sep 28, 2009#44

Shawn

Crone;264104][quote=Shegokigo said:
I actually had a very full and "loving" childhood, at least until I was 15. So my early years are pretty typical of the "well off, religious family, youngest child" life.

how does any of that translate into loving?[/QUOTE]
It means daddy bought her a pony when she was 10 so she "felt" loved.
But hey. She did put loving in quotes, so I'm guessing she wouldn't be surprised if it was just daddy getting her out of his hair for a summer of afternoons.

Sep 28, 2009#45

Dave

All parents have this type of worry. It's natural. Just don't let your paranoia become too consuming and become overprotective.

I know she's not yours, but maybe that biological clock is ticking, eh?

Sep 28, 2009#46

@Li3n

Sure, death by adoration, i heard of that one...

Sep 28, 2009#47

Shegokigo

Crone;264104][quote=Shegokigo said:
I actually had a very full and "loving" childhood, at least until I was 15. So my early years are pretty typical of the "well off, religious family, youngest child" life.

how does any of that translate into loving?[/QUOTE]

You're right. It doesn't. I'll clarify.

Shawnacy said:
It means daddy bought her a pony when she was 10 so she "felt" loved.
But hey. She did put loving in quotes, so I'm guessing she wouldn't be surprised if it was just daddy getting her out of his hair for a summer of afternoons.

Was there for every special occassion, spent time with me even when swamped with work at home, took me on alot of work vacations just to be sure I'd have a good time instead of being left at home, etc etc etc

Dave said:
I know she's not yours, but maybe that biological clock is ticking, eh?

I haven't laughed that hard all month. Thanks Dave!

Sep 28, 2009#48

North_Ranger

Nah, she'll be okay. Brilliant kids usually dumb down with age.

Besides, every child who dies tragically or disappears is presented as a little angel that can do no wrong. Madeleine McCann, anyone? It sells papers and gets viewers better than "rugrat from hell gets squashed by a 400-pound hippo" or "that little glue-eating bastard had it coming".

Sep 28, 2009#49

Andromache

Shegokigo said:
Was there for every special occassion, spent time with me even when swamped with work at home, took me on alot of work vacations just to be sure I'd have a good time instead of being left at home, etc etc etc

until age 15. you already know my thoughts on the rest of that matter, from our days in WoW, so I won't say anything else that might broach your privacy. But what happened to you at age 15 then is not the act of a loving parent.

Sep 28, 2009#50

Shegokigo

It's the act of parents who puts religion before family/children.

Sep 28, 2009#51

Andromache

Shegokigo said:
It's the act of parents who puts religion before family/children.

and what love is in that?

Ive said it before, and youve admitted it, but lets kick the can one more time.

What, my dear (namewithheld) is love? How do you know?

Sep 28, 2009#52

The Lovely Boehner

I think it seems like some sense of seeing too much bad news. You never hear about the perfect person that goes to college, gets a fulfilling career, meets the love of her life, and has children, and dies living a full life. But if a 7 year old dies, it's a big deal. It's also a factor of no one ever maligning the dead. If some 6-year old girl dies that was a real piece of shit and tortured kitties, the news story is still going to be about what a precious angel she was.

Sep 28, 2009#53

ElJuski

movies and television has an awesome way of skewing our perceptions of reality.

Sep 28, 2009#54

North_Ranger

Charlie Dont Surf said:
I think it seems like some sense of seeing too much bad news. You never hear about the perfect person that goes to college, gets a fulfilling career, meets the love of her life, and has children, and dies living a full life. But if a 7 year old dies, it's a big deal. It's also a factor of no one ever maligning the dead. If some 6-year old girl dies that was a real piece of shit and tortured kitties, the news story is still going to be about what a precious angel she was.

Basically what I said a couple of posts before ya, Charlie.

Sep 29, 2009#55

Gill Kaiser

Firstly, do you seriously believe all the newspapers when they state that the latest dead child was 'loved by all'? Of course the people who knew a child who has died suddenly will only have good things to say about him/her to the media. It's not like only good kids die.

Secondly, you only ever hear about the ones that die. You don't hear about the significant majority who do not die, the reason being that "child has happy childhood, does not die" is not newsworthy. If every intelligent, beloved child had a higher risk of dying prematurely, the human race would be a lot more fucked.

Sep 29, 2009#56

RealBigNuke

Crone said:
What, my dear (namewithheld) is love?

Rrrngh... Must not... let a link to Haddaway song be my only contribution...

Shego, your fears are nothing but an unreasonable but also very common and human notion you've gotten from being around too much media. Your niece has no greater odds of dying than any other girl her age. Significantly lower, actually, if she's smart and comes from an affluent family.

A girl that was 'loved by all' and died is more likely to make an impacting story than a girl who wasn't, so they are the ones that get the coverage. Even if they weren't perfect, they'll still be portrayed that way for this purpose. You've seen, "Perfect girl with affluent family, loved by all, dies tragic death" so many times that when you see "Perfect girl with affluent family, loved by all" you just kind of fill that last part in, despite it's incredibly low probability.

... In conclusion, don't worry about it! She's extremely likely to live long enough to have her mind corroded and her innocence trod all over just like the rest of us.

Sep 29, 2009#57

@Li3n

Shegokigo said:
It's the act of parents who puts religion before family/children.

Someone needs to tell him HE'S DOING IT WRONG!™ (religion and love)

Oct 3, 2009#58

Shegokigo

@Li3n said:
Someone needs to tell him HE'S DOING IT WRONG![/SIZE]

His "God" did I'm sure. He went blind from diabetes, my mother got breast cancer and lost her breast, my sister nearly broke her back, can barely walk around anymore, and she lost the court case against her workplace for the injury, while losing her daughter in a custody battle against her ex-husband.

Yeah, "God" really loves them. :rofl:

Oct 3, 2009#59

Ross

The King is loved by all... and he is immortal.

Oct 4, 2009#60

blotsfan

Icarus would like a phone number. It seems like she's very mature for her age.

Oct 4, 2009#61

Terrik

*walks out very slowly*

Oct 4, 2009#62

North_Ranger

blotsfan said:
Icarus would like a phone number. It seems like she's very mature for her age.

Blot, don't make me pimp slap you.

-NR

Oct 4, 2009#63

Chippy

North_Ranger;268602][quote=blotsfan said:
Icarus would like a phone number. It seems like she's very mature for her age.

Blot, don't make me pimp slap you.

-NR[/QUOTE]

It is physically impossible for anyone in Finland to pimp slap.

Oct 4, 2009#64

North_Ranger

Chippy;268682][quote=North_Ranger;268602][quote=blotsfan said:
Icarus would like a phone number. It seems like she's very mature for her age.

Blot, don't make me pimp slap you.

-NR[/QUOTE]

It is physically impossible for anyone in Finland to pimp slap.[/QUOTE]

Incorrect. We just limit it to people who haven't yet earned the privilege to have their teeth punched in.

Oct 4, 2009#65

Chippy

North_Ranger;268683][quote=Chippy;268682][quote=North_Ranger;268602][quote=blotsfan said:
Icarus would like a phone number. It seems like she's very mature for her age.

Oct 4, 2009#66

Deschain

Hmm I choose 'pointless thoughts' based on the fact that logic dictates those traits will probably take her far in life, not kill her. If she was ugly, fat, suffering from genetics diseases, lonely, terrible family life, terrible living situation, I would put her survival rate much lower. There's no reason I would switch them around.

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