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Guys? This is probably the most surefire way to get a woman! Seriously, approach a woman, get their number and then leave these exact kind of messages.

Ladies? You agree, right? Right? Hello?

wow what a creeper.

Power.
Money.
Adonis-like physique.
Big penis.

That oughta cover it, right?

Wow, hard to believe he's still single.

Funny, I thought you just had to leave out bait (for instance, a Banana Republic shopping voucher) in an open area, and then retreat to the nearest vantage point with a dart rifle and a pocketful of tranqs. It's worked so far, anyway.

And I thought all you needed was a penis made of chocolate that ejaculates money....

Tranq darts are cheaper.

There's nothing wrong with me.

Click to expand...

I dunno, guys, I have this weird feeling he's lying.

---------- Post added at 11:55 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:48 PM ----------

Seriously, this is almost as funny as it is creepy. I love how he spends weekends 'working on a movie script'. I swear, the deliberate manner in which he speaks sounds like he's going to blow any minute and go on a killing spree. I assume he'd start with the six women that approach him every day, lol.

Ohhhhhhhhhh, GOD. I am so uncomfortable right now. When he said, "This is how it's gonna go..." I thought he was going to say, "I'm going to sharpen my axe..."

Creeeeep. Creepy creepy creep!

He sounds like he's at least in his thirties, and he's saying stuff I learned to never, EVER say when I was 18.

Just... just... how can someone think that's ok? Who failed them so badly that THAT'S how they learned to try and get girls? Christ, man, I hope you enjoy the feel of a man's touch. And by a man's touch, I mean your own.

Cajungal said:

Ohhhhhhhhhh, GOD. I am so uncomfortable right now. When he said, "This is how it's gonna go..." I thought he was going to say, "I'm going to sharpen my axe..."

Creeeeep. Creepy creepy creep!

Click to expand...

I know, right? Now try listening to it again, at the same time as this:

You just know that's gonna be presented as evidence some day.

O_O .. I have that exact answering machine.

Matt² said:

O_O .. I have that exact answering machine.

Click to expand...

Olga?

Cajungal said:

Just... just... how can someone think that's ok? Who failed them so badly that THAT'S how they learned to try and get girls? Christ, man, I hope you enjoy the feel of a man's touch. And by a man's touch, I mean your own.

Click to expand...

Well, I was a real dumbass when I was 18. Come to think of it, most 18 year olds are dumb. During my freshman year, I tried something similar (although it was not nearly as bad as THAT doozy) and pretty much got what I deserved. It boggles my mind that somebody can be his age and still not know the basic social skills.

Matt² said:

O_O .. I have that exact answering machine.

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How dare you not call that man back, he was clearly a 'complete catch'. You must have been abused as a child! Quick, show us on the doll where you were touched.

Philosopher B.;438669][QUOTE=Matt² said:

O_O .. I have that exact answering machine.

Click to expand...

How dare you not call that man back, he was clearly a 'complete catch'. You must have been abused as a child! Quick, show us on the doll where you were touched.[/QUOTE]

well he WAS pretty creepy! I think he escaped from a loony bin somewhere.

Thanks to some of my posts in this forum, you know how awful and immature I am with girls and relationships...

Well, I'm still pretty sure I'm much better than this guy.

You know what the worst of all this? I believe this is the same guy here in Toronto that actually gives professional dating advice on how to pick up a woman.

ThatNickGuy said:

You know what the worst of all this? I believe this is the same guy here in Toronto that actually gives professional dating advice on how to pick up a woman.

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So could this be a kind of "this is exactly what NOT to do" kind of thing?


just keeping hope alive.

Or, even worse, does this actually work?

Total Tortoise Revenue;438710][QUOTE=ThatNickGuy said:

You know what the worst of all this? I believe this is the same guy here in Toronto that actually gives professional dating advice on how to pick up a woman.

Click to expand...

So could this be a kind of "this is exactly what NOT to do" kind of thing?


just keeping hope alive.[/QUOTE]

No, I'm pretty certain that this guy really is this full of himself.

---------- Post added at 08:08 AM ---------- Previous post was at 07:54 AM ----------

Remember Dimitri the Lover? - Torontoist

Proof! With several links to other articles.

Oh yeah, this guy's serious:
THE OFFICIAL WEB SITE OF DIMITRI THE LOVER, CANADA'S GREATEST LOVER AND SEDUCER!

I tried to come up with something to say in response to that but I can't really think of anything.

I think I am getting punkd by life right now.

Ah yeah, one more reason to hate Toronto.

"I hate the skydome and the CN Tower too/
Dmitri the Lover and the metro zoo..."

</western elitism>

Boom de yadda, boom de yadda, boom de yadda!

Reading about and listening to this has just made my day.

Dimitri the Lover Exposes Himself

Wow.

Chazwozel said:

Dimitri the Lover Exposes Himself

"....seduction community....."

Feminism has destroyed the courtship ritual; [women's] biological calling is to be gang banged on a daily basis.

Metrosexuals are closet ***s; metrosexuality is a big feminist media conspiracy and guys should not be metrosexuals at all.

Click to expand...

LOL... LOL.... ROFLOL....

seduction community? really?

he's so....



only slimier and creepier.

This guy is a lunatic. I'm almost certain he reveres the amount of attention he is receiving, even though the majority of it is negative. Long rant short, he's just another IRL troll vying for that fifteen minutes of fame.

L-O-L, that blog on Dmitri is fucking scary!

Total Tortoise Revenue said:

he's so....

only slimier and creepier.

Click to expand...

Please. Leisure Suit Larry has boatloads more class than Dimitri.

Which is sad.

Yeah i felt i was giving Larry the short end there.

Larry's cool.

Dimitri the Lover

Real name: James Sears.

Former psychiatrist, lost his license after being convicted of sexually assaulting female patients.

Gee, bet nobody here saw that coming.

EDIT: Oh God, it gets worse.

Wow. This guy is a real winner.

He's pretty straightforward. He only wants women who are crazy, and he's teaching guys how to attract such women.

ThatGrinningIdiot! said:

This guy is a lunatic.

Click to expand...

He actually has a well documented history of mental illness.

what really scares me is that this guy puts "scary rapist" waaay too close to "confidence guys need to date women" and there might actually be influenced creeps out there that just go "fuck it, lets rape someone" today.

What an AWESOME thread! I'm a journalism student in Toronto, Canada, working on a report on local celebrity "Dimitri The Lover". I conducted a quick Google search and came across this blog discussion. There is strong evidence pointing at the fact that the "Douchey voicemails" are merely viral marketing for a Hollywood film by producer Brad Goodman of Borat, Bruno, Religulous, etc. There is a press release which includes the movie trailer here, Dimitri The Lover Movie Production Team Hosts First Press Conference to Screen Work in Progress and mention of the film on Dimitri The Lover's twitter here DIMITRI THE LOVER (dimitrithelover) on Twitter.

I am still researching the subject, but will keep you guys in the loop.

Yeah, I've seen this happen in his blog before. I really hope this is just an attempt at trolling . . .

So, did Dimitri just post here?

No troll. I'm studying Journalism at Ryerson University in Toronto. The viral marketing hoax is unsubstantiated. I've been trying to get commentary from Dimitri's production company or his mananger, but with no luck. A really bizarre email surfaced in which he endorsed one of the local Mayor candidates. He then took single-handed credit for his surge in the polls (a big of megalomania on Dimitri's part). Overall quite an interesting character.

Amorous Eyes;439073][QUOTE=Toronto Stud said:

Overall quite an interesting character.

Click to expand...

He should be shot.[/QUOTE]

Can I quote you on that? lol! Opinion locally from many groups seems to mirror your own, but there are just as many fans. Interestingly, gay males like myself find Dimitri amusing, but lesbians loathe him. I have to run off to class now. I found the endorsement email Dimitri fired off here Dimitri the Lover Endorses Rob Ford in Email We'd Rather Not Share - Torontoist and also you might find this Page 3 article in the Toronto Sun on his "celebrity endorsement" of Rob Ford amusing. Mike Strobel is one of my favourite local writers, and a man I hope to one day emulate when I am a full fledged journalist These mayoral endorsements worth celebrating | Mike Strobel | Columnists | News | Toronto Sun

this thread got extra weird....

Dear Toronto Stud: you might want to shore up your credibility by introducing yourself by name and giving us an idea who you are beyond the context of this thread; because as it is, posting in here as "Toronto stud" may skew opinions of why you're here.


(Also, I don't loathe him, but I sure as hell would taser him on sight for my own personal safety.)

If he were in some kind of porn site instead of a creepy weirdo posing as a doctor I might not care. As is, yeah taser him.. taser him right in his balls.

PCT said:

Dear Toronto Stud: you might want to shore up your credibility by introducing yourself by name and giving us an idea who you are beyond the context of this thread; because as it is, posting in here as "Toronto stud" may skew opinions of why you're here.


(Also, I don't loathe him, but I sure as hell would taser him on sight for my own personal safety.)

Click to expand...

My name is Jamie Smith. I'm on Facebook in Toronto. I'm posing with my dog Noir. My boyfriend Todd took the photo. She passed away a few months ago. Anyway, I'll check the discussion after class

Toronto Stud said:

I'm studying Journalism at Ryerson University in Toronto.

Click to expand...

When did Ryerson get a journalism program?

huh well that was unexpected....

...This thread already started in a weird place, and now may have gone completely effin' crackers.

Looks like halforums just discovered how to attract gay journalism students.

Seems we got the message of the video all wrong.

Amorous Eyes;439073][QUOTE=Toronto Stud said:

Overall quite an interesting character.

Click to expand...

He should be shot.[/QUOTE]


I think the point is that he might be a made-up character, similar along the lines of Borat and Bruno.

Chazwozel;439101][QUOTE=Amorous Eyes;439073][QUOTE=Toronto Stud said:

Overall quite an interesting character.

Click to expand...

He should be shot.[/QUOTE]


I think the point is that he might be a made-up character, similar along the lines of Borat and Bruno.[/QUOTE]

Except Sasha Baron Cohen is a comedian and James Sears is a disgraced former doctor and sex offender.

You breath calmly. After a few seconds, the psychologist continues, "Now where did the bad thread touch you?"

Suddenly the room starts to spin, and you awaken alone on a nice soft floor in a padded white room...

What in the hell.

Frank;439104][QUOTE=Chazwozel;439101][QUOTE=Amorous Eyes;439073][QUOTE=Toronto Stud said:

Overall quite an interesting character.

Click to expand...

He should be shot.[/QUOTE]


I think the point is that he might be a made-up character, similar along the lines of Borat and Bruno.[/QUOTE]

Except Sasha Baron Cohen is a comedian and James Sears is a disgraced former doctor and sex offender.[/QUOTE]


Cannot stress that last part enough. When one has one's practicing license revoked for molesting patients, it DOES tend to throw a lack of credibility on one's status. I will give Sears credit for delving into the psyche and figuring out which buttons to push with a select portion of the female population, but he destroys this effort with his underlying skeeziness. It's one thing to work the "dominant male" angle, quite another to say that "all women want to be gang-banged."

tl;dr 6/10 troll, who's unfortunately going to get his 15 minutes.

---------- Post added at 01:58 PM ---------- Previous post was at 01:57 PM ----------

Frank said:

So, did Dimitri just post here?

Click to expand...

Yeah, just a little bit. He does, after all have plenty of time on his hands, when he's not working on his film script on the weekends.

Well huh.

Some recent photos show Dimitri at a local high school. He runs an extracurricular workshop that teaches introductory courtship skills.

Toronto Stud;439086][QUOTE=PCT said:

Dear Toronto Stud: you might want to shore up your credibility by introducing yourself by name and giving us an idea who you are beyond the context of this thread; because as it is, posting in here as "Toronto stud" may skew opinions of why you're here.


(Also, I don't loathe him, but I sure as hell would taser him on sight for my own personal safety.)

Click to expand...

My name is Jamie Smith. I'm on Facebook in Toronto. I'm posing with my dog Noir. My boyfriend Todd took the photo. She passed away a few months ago. Anyway, I'll check the discussion after class[/QUOTE]

I presume it to be this one?
Jamie Smith | Facebook - Enter at your own peril.

hrm.

im sorry i clicked that.

:blue:

thats it. We need a video intro, with voice.

And a cake. I could really go for some cake.

And my sword.

And my axe.

That poor dog.

The problem is... You don't just... swim naked? into Mortor.

Well you may not...

Baerdog said:

That poor dog.

Click to expand...

He's... hugging it

Special hug...from...behind...

WTF is he doing to that dog?!

And MY Glock!

Toronto Stud;439078][QUOTE=Amorous Eyes;439073][QUOTE=Toronto Stud said:

Overall quite an interesting character.

Click to expand...

He should be shot.[/QUOTE]

Can I quote you on that? lol! Opinion locally from many groups seems to mirror your own, but there are just as many fans. Interestingly, gay males like myself find Dimitri amusing, but lesbians loathe him. I have to run off to class now. I found the endorsement email Dimitri fired off here Dimitri the Lover Endorses Rob Ford in Email We'd Rather Not Share - Torontoist and also you might find this Page 3 article in the Toronto Sun on his "celebrity endorsement" of Rob Ford amusing. Mike Strobel is one of my favourite local writers, and a man I hope to one day emulate when I am a full fledged journalist These mayoral endorsements worth celebrating | Mike Strobel | Columnists | News | Toronto Sun[/QUOTE]

If this is, in fact accurate data, then I suspect that it has something to do with the fact that Sears doesn't predate upon guys.

Honestly, I think possibly the most disturbing thing about this fella is not that he's offering training on how to be a sleazeball just like him (it's not like he's the only guy on the market, and whilst the 'seduction community' has a pretty high baseline level of skeeziness, Sears is still a massive, obvious outlier), but that he offers his services as an expert witness for sexual assault/harassment cases. I mean, Jesus fuck.

He's posing with his dog, man! I can tell you from my personal experience that hugging doesn't equal fucking!

Silver Jelly said:

He's posing with his dog, man! I can tell you from my personal experience that hugging doesn't equal fucking!

Click to expand...

sometimes it's fun to read between your lines.

if you know what i mean

Yeah, I also love to do that.

Dammit SJ. Now your avatar is just fucking CREEPY

It'd be creepier if his tongue was sticking out between the fingers.

Silver Jelly said:

Yeah, I also love to do that.

Click to expand...

are you... coming on to me?
aranoid:

Officer_Charon said:

And MY Glock!

Click to expand...

And my Smith & Wesson 5946.....sigh.

Must... resist... urge... aw, who am I kidding?



Heeheehee!

Re: How to Attract a Woman

drifter said:

Must... resist... urge... aw, who am I kidding?

Heeheehee!

Click to expand...

That actually took more time than I was expecting it to.

SpecialKO;439220][QUOTE=drifter said:

Must... resist... urge... aw, who am I kidding?

Heeheehee!

Click to expand...

That actually took more time than I was expecting it to.[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I was thinking about it when I was pasting my face under peach's hand. The placement isn't ENTIRELY random. If this forum was in spanish, you'd be used to my "is he saying what I think he's saying" jokes. But, alas, I struggle with english.

i keep misreading the thread title as How to Attack a Woman.

Then you've really misread nothing.

Frank said:

Then you've really misread nothing.

Click to expand...

And it's a 3-pointer from the Mount-Me! *grins*

So wait, was that really him using a sock-puppet account?


....sock-puppet...


...OH GOD!

You would think a guy who claims to be "straight-forward" all the time would have the cajonies to admit it's him.

I wonder what search terms he used to find this place, actually.

Good question. I did a general search for Dimitri the Lover and after 4 or 5 pages of results I found nothing. It'd be interesting for this person to tell us how they found us. And if you really are Dimitri? Dude. Just say so. We are nothing, if not kind.

No, I am Dimitri.

PCT said:

i keep misreading the thread title as How to Attack a Woman.

Click to expand...

There's a difference?!

Sorry, @li3n, Charon got to that one first.

Ah Dimitri,

You're that guy in college we all knew. You would talk of having big game, but in the end we all knew you cried yourself to sleep. Half of your conquests were chicks so drunk they would probably fuck a decaying gorilla carcass, and the other half were so bat-shit insane that they would do it sober. We would roll our eyes at your zany sexual escapades (as if none of us could do what it is you do). The difference between that guy and you, Dimitri, is that "that guy" eventually grew out of it.

One could prescribe to Dimitri's lifestyle, and possibly delude himself into believing that his existence has any sort of merit or meaning. He just might make it to age 50 without putting a .22 barrel in his mouth and pulling the trigger.

If I were Dimitri, I'd save myself about 20 years and just fucking do it now.

Does this mean Dmitri is kind of an advanced stage of Bro?

makare said:

Does this mean Dmitri is kind of an advanced stage of Bro?

Click to expand...

"Brosefs" are less annoying than "Dimitri's (oh sweet he's got his own moniker). Even Tucker Max eventually realized what a douche he was.

Iaculus said:

Sorry, @li3n, Charon got to that one first.

Click to expand...

Chazwozel said:

Half of your conquests were chicks so drunk they would probably fuck a decaying gorilla carcass.

Click to expand...

This image bums me out.

rigor mortis lasts a long time for gorilla carcasses.

makare said:

rigor mortis lasts a long time for gorilla carcasses.

Click to expand...

I don't like you anymore. :|

escushion;439645][QUOTE=makare said:

rigor mortis lasts a long time for gorilla carcasses.

Click to expand...

I don't like you anymore. :|[/QUOTE]

well that didn't last long now did it?

makare;439650][QUOTE=escushion;439645][QUOTE=makare said:

rigor mortis lasts a long time for gorilla carcasses.

Click to expand...

I don't like you anymore. :|[/QUOTE]

well that didn't last long now did it?[/QUOTE]

Not as long as gorilla rigor mortis.

Chazwozel said:

Ah Dimitri,

You're that guy in college we all knew. You would talk of having big game, but in the end we all knew you cried yourself to sleep. Half of your conquests were chicks so drunk they would probably fuck a decaying gorilla carcass, and the other half were so bat-shit insane that they would do it sober. We would roll our eyes at your zany sexual escapades (as if none of us could do what it is you do). The difference between that guy and you, Dimitri, is that "that guy" eventually grew out of it.

One could prescribe to Dimitri's lifestyle, and possibly delude himself into believing that his existence has any sort of merit or meaning. He just might make it to age 50 without putting a .22 barrel in his mouth and pulling the trigger.

If I were Dimitri, I'd save myself about 20 years and just fucking do it now.

Click to expand...

I had a college roommate just like this!

He's currently in Mexico, having jumped bail on rape charges. In retrospect I should have seen it coming.

Cajungal;439630][QUOTE=Chazwozel said:

Half of your conquests were chicks so drunk they would probably fuck a decaying gorilla carcass.

Click to expand...

This image bums me out.[/QUOTE]

But sounds like my prom night!

BTW, i'm sure i saw this a whole while back... wasn't it here then too?!