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I don't even have a degree... I have a crappy diploma. My wife has two degrees and is going for her masters. Doesn't bother me in the slightest.
At least we'll be safe when the first signs of a Pandemic emerge and the country is completely sealed from the rest of the world.
C
Chibibar
If the reason she has a higher degree makes you don't wanna date her I'm gonna slaps you silly!
Don't be intimidated. Enjoy the moment and just have fun. Remember it is just dating. You get to learn the other person and see how it goes, if it doesn't then just date a different person
Don't be intimidated. Enjoy the moment and just have fun. Remember it is just dating. You get to learn the other person and see how it goes, if it doesn't then just date a different person
M
Matt²
Not exactly sure what's going on with her. Either she's painfully shy of meeting or really is bad at checking emails.If the reason she has a higher degree makes you don't wanna date her I'm gonna slaps you silly!
Don't be intimidated. Enjoy the moment and just have fun. Remember it is just dating. You get to learn the other person and see how it goes, if it doesn't then just date a different person
J
Jiarn
Could be worse. You could have just spent 4hrs on a date last night, just to hear about how it was the 1yr anniversary of her ex's death to lukemia for the entire conversation.
Dave
Staff member
Ouch. Someone wasn't ready to start dating again. That must have been uncomfortable.
Dude... that's even making me feel uncomfortable... sorry to hear about that.
So she's available?
J
Jiarn
Yep, as you could tell by the fact we were out on a date.
WTF? Seriously man, I've had just about enough of this.
I'm going to take a seat and force you to take one across from me and we'll have a chat, you and me.
Listen carefully.
If you have one bad relationship after another, the only common denominator is YOU.
Think about it.
Yes, YOU Mr. Nice Guy.
What's wrong with "Nice Guys?" like you? The biggest problem is that most nice guys are hideously insecure. They are so anxious to be liked and loved that they do things for other people to gain acceptance and attention rather than for the simply pleasure of giving. Most girls don't know if a nice guy really likes them for who that are or if he has glommed onto her out of desperation because she actually paid some kind of attention to him.
Nice guys reek of insecurity which is a big red target for the predators of the world. There are women out there who are just looking for a sucker to take advantage of. These women home-in on "Nice Guys" and take them for a ride. Self-confident, caring, decent-hearted women find "Nice Guys" to be too clingy, self-abasing and insecure. In either case, you lose.
It's no wonder so many nice guys complain about women being horrible or difficult. Honestly, they are not. Unless they have a medical condition or Italian. Most women are perfectly normal and easy to deal with.
Nice guys think they know about romance but their timing is all fucken wrong and they either come-on too strong, too hard and too fast OR they are so fucken shy and unassertive, that they hang around pretending to be "friends", in the hope that somehow, someway, they will get the courage up to ask her out for a "date". If you haven't insinuated that you want to put your twig and berries in her grand canyon then you shouldn't hope for it to happen 3 to 6 months later.
Nice Guys will bring roses to a "lets get together for coffee" date and they try to buy her affections with presents and fancy things that makes you look like a big ol' Pussy to Jay. They are so desperate to please that they put aside their own needs and place the object of their desire on a pedestal. Instead of appreciating her, they worship her. They cling to her and want to be "one" with her for fear that if she is out of sight, she may disappear or become attracted to someone else.
Nice Guys are always asking HER to make the decisions. Don't, you fucken pussy. They think it's being equitable but it actually puts an unfair burden of responsibility on her and gives him the opportunity to blame her if the decision was an unwise one.
Nice Guys rarely speak up when something bothers them and rarely state clearly what it is they want, need and expect. They fear that any kind of conflict might spell the end of the relationship. Instead of compromising and negotiating, they repeatedly "give in". When she doesn't appreciate their sacrifice, they will complain that, "Everything I did, I did for her" as if this somehow elevates them to the status of martyrs. A woman doesn't want a martyr. She wants an equal, caring, adult partner. Not a goddamn pussy. After all, she can peruse for another penis online in less than 5 minutes if she wanted to.
This ultimately boils down to the fact that Nice Guys don't like themselves. Is it any wonder women don't like them? In order to truly love someone else, you must first love yourself. I'm not asking you to lock yourself in your bedroom and help put Mr. Kleenex's kids through college but to simply start respecting yourself.
Get this : INSECURITY ISN'T SEXY. IT'S A TURNOFF.
You don't have to be an ego-inflated, arrogant jerk like me. You just have to LIKE yourself. You have to know what you want out of life and go after it. Only then will you be attractive to the kind of woman with whom a long-term relationship is possible.
Hopefully you don't take this personal but you asked for it, here it is.
Deal with it.
As a former doormat I must concur with Jay's advice. Women find confidence attractive and you can only gain confidence by liking who you are and being happy about it.
Damn Jay, I could have used this talk about 4-5 years ago
Damn Jay, I could have used this talk about 4-5 years ago
J
Jiarn
New date tonight. Woman 6yrs older than me. Invited me to join her and a couple of friends for her b-day. I wonder what she'd like as a present? -sly grin-
J
Jiarn
Had a fantastic night. B-day girl and I spent about 4hrs straight dancing the night away. 3 floor club with 3 different types of music. Just a great night. She got a bit freaky on the floor, I freaked right back. Wanted to kiss her all night but there were a few of her friends around and wasn't sure she wanted that kind of info to be spreading around (well other than how glued together we were for the night). Walked her to her car, talked for a bit and couldn't resist. Wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her in. Couple of sweet kisses and we parted ways for the night.
She's a great girl, though I'm not sure she's long term material for me. Alot of things not in common, but she's already invited me to Vegas in Feb and we're definitely going to see more of each other (we work together) and go out again, maybe a bit more privately next time. She also convinced me to get a facebook, which she comments on daily. Which I found a bit interesting, because whenever someonelse comments on her facebook she doesn't really reply, but everytime I do, she replies instantly.
Was also a bit "different" for me to go out with someone who's older than me, better off financially and with a child older than mine. Different not in a bad way, just different.
She's a great girl, though I'm not sure she's long term material for me. Alot of things not in common, but she's already invited me to Vegas in Feb and we're definitely going to see more of each other (we work together) and go out again, maybe a bit more privately next time. She also convinced me to get a facebook, which she comments on daily. Which I found a bit interesting, because whenever someonelse comments on her facebook she doesn't really reply, but everytime I do, she replies instantly.
Was also a bit "different" for me to go out with someone who's older than me, better off financially and with a child older than mine. Different not in a bad way, just different.
J
Jiarn
To prevent unnecessary new threads I'll just keep hijacking this one:
So we're set for 2 more weekends of dates now. Had a lunch date after work yesterday, talked for an hour over Starbucks (Hey Calleja, cougars DO go there!) and made plans for upcoming outings.This weekend is an art bazaar (where I'm hoping to pick up some new pieces for my very barren walled new apt) as well as have drinks (there's drink stands all through the streets there) and see where things go. Then on the 12th, we're headed to a Spurs game.
So I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. Just keep the faith Matt, there's always hope.
So we're set for 2 more weekends of dates now. Had a lunch date after work yesterday, talked for an hour over Starbucks (Hey Calleja, cougars DO go there!) and made plans for upcoming outings.This weekend is an art bazaar (where I'm hoping to pick up some new pieces for my very barren walled new apt) as well as have drinks (there's drink stands all through the streets there) and see where things go. Then on the 12th, we're headed to a Spurs game.
So I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. Just keep the faith Matt, there's always hope.
C
Chibibar
Jay: You got it bro.
I got that realization when I was dumb by a girl (who was a friend) cause I was "just too nice" after that I just went F'it. I'll just do what I want and women will accept me or reject for what I am, not what I can give.
I got that realization when I was dumb by a girl (who was a friend) cause I was "just too nice" after that I just went F'it. I'll just do what I want and women will accept me or reject for what I am, not what I can give.
J
Jiarn
I'm still a little "too nice" with most women I talk to / try and date, but a level of confidence is really required.
I find being a little more forward than I "think" I should be gets me pretty far. Just enough to pass my own comfort zone but not enough to pass hers.
I find being a little more forward than I "think" I should be gets me pretty far. Just enough to pass my own comfort zone but not enough to pass hers.
M
Matt²
no no.. start your own thread.
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