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This homecare thing has been really interesting.
For the last two days, I've been supervising visits by parents who have had their children taken away from them. Not really homecare, but it's something my company does, and it pays, so I don't complain.
Anyhow, aside from initial awkwardness (which is to be expected when I show up with a person's child and say "hi, now I will sit on your couch and make sure you are able to look after your own flesh and blood.") it's been pretty good. The couple I was with today were amazing, and I cannot imagine why their child could have possibly been taken away. It's not my job to determine anything like that, of course, but they just seemed so loving and friendly.
The family I was with yesterday were great. The parents were immigrants, and they had four children. At the end of it all, the mother (who has custody of the children) told me I seemed like I would be a great father. That was truly the most affecting compliment I've received in a very long time, even if I'm way too young to be thinking that way. (I've also been trying not to dwell on the fact that the children's father needs to be supervised when he visits, and thus, a potted plant might be a better father in this woman's eyes.)
Not so much of a rant, but I felt like sharing with someone.
For the last two days, I've been supervising visits by parents who have had their children taken away from them. Not really homecare, but it's something my company does, and it pays, so I don't complain.
Anyhow, aside from initial awkwardness (which is to be expected when I show up with a person's child and say "hi, now I will sit on your couch and make sure you are able to look after your own flesh and blood.") it's been pretty good. The couple I was with today were amazing, and I cannot imagine why their child could have possibly been taken away. It's not my job to determine anything like that, of course, but they just seemed so loving and friendly.
The family I was with yesterday were great. The parents were immigrants, and they had four children. At the end of it all, the mother (who has custody of the children) told me I seemed like I would be a great father. That was truly the most affecting compliment I've received in a very long time, even if I'm way too young to be thinking that way. (I've also been trying not to dwell on the fact that the children's father needs to be supervised when he visits, and thus, a potted plant might be a better father in this woman's eyes.)
Not so much of a rant, but I felt like sharing with someone.
I concur, this was excellent.Vagabond said:CynicismKills said:
This made my day, honestly.
To this day I have no idea what the hell he's saying in 90% of that song. I prefer to make it up myself. :uhhuh:ZenMonkey said:I concur, this was excellent.Vagabond said:CynicismKills said:
This made my day, honestly.
I have the collection with that strip in it somewhere. I love that comic.DarkAudit said:CynicismKills said:To this day I have no idea what the hell he's saying in 90% of that song. I prefer to make it up myself. :uhhuh:ZenMonkey said:I concur, this was excellent.Vagabond said:
This made my day, honestly.
I'm perfectly fine. Thanks for your concern though. It's not something we hear a lot of. On the positive side, the guy spent the day in cells yelling about how he almost bagged him a cop and how if he ever has the oppurtunity again he will finish the job. So, my co-members just put a tape recorder on the guard desk and got a good amount of what he was yelling on tape. This guy is fucked. Another charge. He got remand without bail too. Fuck him.Cajungal said:
Lately I've been trying to patch things up with that woman I'm sure your all sick of me talking about and things have been going well. We're talking more and things are more relaxed between us, even if I still get the occasional twinges of pain from some of the things she says. Things aren't as good as they used to be but they are getting better and that's encouraging for me. It really gives me hope that maybe some day, things will be right between us... that someday we might be able to be the same kind of friends we used to be.
So anyway, she calls me up about 3pm today. Apparently she got arrested on Friday for shoplifting. Two women who worked at the place she was at saw her and confronted her about it, at which point she admitted it and surrendered. They then violently accosted her and handcuffed her, damaging her arm (she had been seeing a chiropractor about pains in it and her hand.) She gets picked up by the police, spends a tearful night in jail, but eventually gets released because they simply didn't have the space to keep her for the moment. She gets a court date and all of that... but here's a problem: Somebody trumped the charges from her misdemeanor to ROBBERY 3, which carries a 6 month sentence. She's understandably upset about this... not only is she looking at losing 6 months of her life, but the two women who assaulted her (and that's what it was, Assault, as they weren't licensed officers of the law) may have seriously hurt her arm. It's been discolored ever since she got back home.
Anyways, after she gets done talking to me about this, she jokingly (or perhaps not so jokingly) says that if she can't fight the charge and gets the 6 months, she's going to try and run. Here's how the conversation went from there:
"OK... well if I don't hear from you for awhile, at least I'll know why."
"Well you could always twitter (her boyfriend) for info, you know."
"*sigh* If I must."
"One of these days your going to see that (her boyfriend) is an alright guy, Michael."
"Look (her name)... I don't have a problem with him. This is an issue with me and my feelings, not him."
"I know. OK, look... do you like me?"
"Of course I do. Your my closest friend."
"And you'd do anything you could for me, right?"
"There is a line."
*jokingly* "Oh really... a line huh?"
I'd been dreading her asking me a question like this for some time now. Before all of this happened, there would have been no question: I'd have done everything I could have for her... and even afterward I'd have still done what I could have for her, but she has been pushing this crap with her boyfriend for months now. She has shown a callus disregard for my feelings through all of this and I've been having a hard time explaining to her just what the problem is with me being around her boyfriend (that I feel like he must be so much better than me that it triggers self-destructive desires in me whenever I even think about being around him). After all the pain she'd put me through... after all the lies she'd told me, all the times she had intentionally mislead me, and most of all, all the pushing she has been doing ever since this has all started, there was only one thing I could say: "There is now."
She got real quiet then and then quickly said goodbye. I had clearly hurt her feelings.
So here's what I don't get... Why do I feel bad about doing it? Why do I feel guilty about hurting her feelings when she hasn't shown me any compassion through all of this ordeal? Why do I feel like -I- should be apologizing, when I haven't done anything wrong?
Sorry for posting this... but hey, at least it's not a Manbaw this time! :slywink:
So anyway, she calls me up about 3pm today. Apparently she got arrested on Friday for shoplifting. Two women who worked at the place she was at saw her and confronted her about it, at which point she admitted it and surrendered. They then violently accosted her and handcuffed her, damaging her arm (she had been seeing a chiropractor about pains in it and her hand.) She gets picked up by the police, spends a tearful night in jail, but eventually gets released because they simply didn't have the space to keep her for the moment. She gets a court date and all of that... but here's a problem: Somebody trumped the charges from her misdemeanor to ROBBERY 3, which carries a 6 month sentence. She's understandably upset about this... not only is she looking at losing 6 months of her life, but the two women who assaulted her (and that's what it was, Assault, as they weren't licensed officers of the law) may have seriously hurt her arm. It's been discolored ever since she got back home.
Anyways, after she gets done talking to me about this, she jokingly (or perhaps not so jokingly) says that if she can't fight the charge and gets the 6 months, she's going to try and run. Here's how the conversation went from there:
"OK... well if I don't hear from you for awhile, at least I'll know why."
"Well you could always twitter (her boyfriend) for info, you know."
"*sigh* If I must."
"One of these days your going to see that (her boyfriend) is an alright guy, Michael."
"Look (her name)... I don't have a problem with him. This is an issue with me and my feelings, not him."
"I know. OK, look... do you like me?"
"Of course I do. Your my closest friend."
"And you'd do anything you could for me, right?"
"There is a line."
*jokingly* "Oh really... a line huh?"
I'd been dreading her asking me a question like this for some time now. Before all of this happened, there would have been no question: I'd have done everything I could have for her... and even afterward I'd have still done what I could have for her, but she has been pushing this crap with her boyfriend for months now. She has shown a callus disregard for my feelings through all of this and I've been having a hard time explaining to her just what the problem is with me being around her boyfriend (that I feel like he must be so much better than me that it triggers self-destructive desires in me whenever I even think about being around him). After all the pain she'd put me through... after all the lies she'd told me, all the times she had intentionally mislead me, and most of all, all the pushing she has been doing ever since this has all started, there was only one thing I could say: "There is now."
She got real quiet then and then quickly said goodbye. I had clearly hurt her feelings.
So here's what I don't get... Why do I feel bad about doing it? Why do I feel guilty about hurting her feelings when she hasn't shown me any compassion through all of this ordeal? Why do I feel like -I- should be apologizing, when I haven't done anything wrong?
Sorry for posting this... but hey, at least it's not a Manbaw this time! :slywink:
I know full well what she is. I've always known... and as it is, I don't have any romantic inclinations for her anymore, based mainly on the fact that I can't trust her anymore (if i ever could). It also helps that she's on the other side of the country at the moment, so we basically talk mainly through Twitter and phone calls.Krisken said:
I understand your concern, but don't worry... she drives me nuts but it's not like she's physically in my life... and I am prepared for her if she tries to cross it.
Cajungal
Staff member
You feel bad because she's your friend and you'd like to be able to do anything for your friends. But if you were to ask my opinion I'd say that you said the right thing. It's not easy to say what's right. One of my favorite teachers told me once that we need fewer nicepeople in this world--meaning people who will do or say anything to make someone feel good rather than telling the truth/what needs to be said.
She sounds like trouble, but it also sounds like you're handling it. If she runs, for God's sake don't let her in your house.
She sounds like trouble, but it also sounds like you're handling it. If she runs, for God's sake don't let her in your house.
No shit. If she does run, I'd be willing to talk to her on the phone or something, but I'd never let her in my parents house. If it were just me, I might have been tempted... but I am not willing to risk my parents freedom to help her.Cajungal said:
Was interested in this girl I had known from my previous move to GA. I thought she had matured thanks to college and living on her own, but after the last visit with her I was wrong. No mind-to-mouth filter, my friends can't stand her, and she still doesn't have a sense of humor.
Jesus fucking Christ, Ash! What the fuck does this chick need to do for you to realize that she may be a lost cause? Look at it this way, if you JUST MET her, would you hang out with her?
Look at what she's doing right now, sucking pity out of you, talking about her arm hurting and shit. Do you have ANY OTHER SIDE OF THE STORY other than her pity party stories?!? Dude, take it from the old guy -RUN!
Look at what she's doing right now, sucking pity out of you, talking about her arm hurting and shit. Do you have ANY OTHER SIDE OF THE STORY other than her pity party stories?!? Dude, take it from the old guy -RUN!
Oh no, how scary! Glad it was nothing too serious.Tress said:
He claims to be feeling better, but he's of the old school tough-guy mindset. He won't discuss how he's feeling unless he absolutely has to. He thinks showing any sign of pain or weakness would cause some kind of problem or inconvenience for us, so he won't do it whenever possible. He could be hit by lightning, get up, and bark at everyone who looked concerned about how it's no big deal.Cajungal said:
I actually think he is feeling better, though. So that's a good sign.
Thanks guys.
Tress...don't post again.
(look at your user rank)
(look at your user rank)
A
Aisaku
I hate... I really really hate SMT Devil Survivor, it's too hard! I enjoy the story a lot, the way it lets you pick your own path to end the game, but for every 5 minutes of story there's hours of levelling and preparation to finish a single fight. Of course not all fights are that bad, as the story progresses it gets harder and harder to the point you have to pretty much redo your team every single fight. Preparation can pretty much go on forever since it's not only your human allies, but their demons, bred and made stronger thru merging them together, levelling them again, rinse and repeat ad nauseum. Of course, you're supposed to rely on your main character, who deals the most damage of all characters. But guess what? I screwed myself over by making him a physical hitter, they let you choose your stats but in the long run the bigger bosses resist physical damage, are made to be taken down with magic.
So I'm close to the end but with little to no hope of survival unless I spend around 10 hours or more per fight. :slap:
I'm out, I'm putting it down until I get a vacation or a reliable faq.
So I'm close to the end but with little to no hope of survival unless I spend around 10 hours or more per fight. :slap:
I'm out, I'm putting it down until I get a vacation or a reliable faq.
Why does the coolest girl I've ever known have to live 12 hours away? And in a month she'll be back in CA while I'm here in GA.
Getting ready for, and applying to, graduate school is a pain in the ass. I have no idea where I'm going to end up, I don't even find out if I was accepted anywhere for another six months bare minimum, and I'm going to be spending about $700 on applications (and another $140-180 to send my GRE scores to these schools...fuck you, ETS, for your monopoly and bleeding students dry).
To top it all off--there's a damn good chance that this will be my fourth good relationship in a row to die because of distance. First was her being out of state, second was me moving back from Japan, third was her moving across the country, now I'm probably going out of state because of the massive suck of the California economy and the fact that the one in-state school I'm applying to is already hard as hell to get into.
I really wish I could speed up the next six months of my life and get all this shit over with.
To top it all off--there's a damn good chance that this will be my fourth good relationship in a row to die because of distance. First was her being out of state, second was me moving back from Japan, third was her moving across the country, now I'm probably going out of state because of the massive suck of the California economy and the fact that the one in-state school I'm applying to is already hard as hell to get into.
I really wish I could speed up the next six months of my life and get all this shit over with.
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