RANT IV - A New Angst

[strawman]

My brother went to a small state college in Arkansas. He was close to graduating, but needed a Fitness and Health class (He played football for cripes sake). The school he was in did not have the class that semester, so he went across the street to a Baptist college to get the credit.

The guy that taught the class told a story of how his wife, also a health teacher at that college, started to gain weight. They started her on a serious diet, which did not work. Then started her on running and sit-ups to keep the mysteriously pooching belly down. Then some months later she went into labor.

TWO COLLEGE EDUCATED HEALTH PROF'S DID NOT KNOW SHE WAS PREGGERS!!!

But we bet that that baby hit the ground running.

In some cases, women with very low body fat or who are ultra athletes do not menstruate, or do so sporadically. It's possible to become pregnant, though, and if you already aren't used to a regular period then I can see how one might not know they are pregnant.

However, in general, I approve of "female" discussions that make guys uncomfortable. It's so much fun to watch guys squirm.

-Adam

 

[Cajungal]

However, in general, I approve of "female" discussions that make guys uncomfortable. It's so much fun to watch guys squirm.

-Adam

Probably one of the only times I'll use this in a semi-serious manner but...

I know, right???

 

However, in general, I approve of "female" discussions that make guys uncomfortable. It's so much fun to watch guys squirm.

Except when there's a sign language interpreter in the class, because then they all watch her to see if they can pick up on the "dirty signs."

 

[Cajungal]

Man, I love having a sign language interpreter in the class. I try to pick things up. I watch movies with foreign subtitles sometimes for the same reason.

 

[sixpackshaker]

Not so much a rant but a WTF?

4th of July.

Sitting with 3 friends and a stranger at a party of their co-worker. Just chit-chatting and catching up, getting to know this 55 y.o. party-goer, when out of the blue she says...

I SEE THE MOON
THE MOON SEES ME
GOD BLESS THE MOON
GOD BLESS ME
AND ALL THOSE THAT I LOVE...

Three of us start exchanging nervous glances, while the 4th, this other 50y.o. New Yawrker (yorker) blurts out,

OH MY GAWD.... THAT WAS SOOOO RANDOM!

 

Man, I love having a sign language interpreter in the class. I try to pick things up. I watch movies with foreign subtitles sometimes for the same reason.

Sorry to inform that any educational interpreter worth her salt knows how to down-low the "dirty" stuff. :slywink:

Although there wasn't much I could do in that one gym class when the teacher went on for five minutes about how gorgeous and perfectly formed his turds were.

 

[strawman]

Man, I love having a sign language interpreter in the class. I try to pick things up. I watch movies with foreign subtitles sometimes for the same reason.

Sorry to inform that any educational interpreter worth her salt knows how to down-low the "dirty" stuff. :slywink:

Although there wasn't much I could do in that one gym class when the teacher went on for five minutes about how gorgeous and perfectly formed his turds were.

Oh great, here we go again with the German toilets.

-Adam

 

[Wasabi Poptart]

In some cases, women with very low body fat or who are ultra athletes do not menstruate, or do so sporadically. It's possible to become pregnant, though, and if you already aren't used to a regular period then I can see how one might not know they are pregnant.

However, in general, I approve of "female" discussions that make guys uncomfortable. It's so much fun to watch guys squirm.

-Adam

A friend of mine had this happen when she was pregnant with her first child. She was a dancer with a petite frame and low body fat, so her periods were very irregular. She knew she didn't feel right, but she didn't know what was causing it. She even went to her gyn, had an exam, and was told she was NOT pregnant! Her boyfriend finally convinced her, a few months later, to let him take her to the ER with some fake severe abdominal symptoms so they would run tests on her. She found out that she was 5 months pregnant.

 

[Cajungal]

Man, I love having a sign language interpreter in the class. I try to pick things up. I watch movies with foreign subtitles sometimes for the same reason.

Sorry to inform that any educational interpreter worth her salt knows how to down-low the "dirty" stuff. :slywink:

Although there wasn't much I could do in that one gym class when the teacher went on for five minutes about how gorgeous and perfectly formed his turds were.

Oh great, here we go again with the German toilets.

-Adam

Am I the unofficial Queen of TMI in here?!?

Can I help it if I was raised to talk about things like this in a nonchalant manner??

 

[HCGLNS]

Rant: I have misplaced my Scotch and pants.

 

[Bubble181]

It might be me, but what is cringeworthy about any of the conversation posted above? There are some "feminine" subjects I'm not terribly comfortable with, but...err...what, childbirth and pregnancy are icky now? :eyeroll:

Also: one part of my job is to follow up the safety of our agents - everyone has to call in (to an automated system of course, not to us) at predetermined intervals, anywhere from every two hours to every five minutes, depending on the risk wherever they're stationed. If they don't, the computer calls them and asks for a sign of life. If they don't respônd (or respond incorrectly) it generates an alarm.
Now, obviously, there are always little mishaps - people give the wrong code, people are in the bathroom or away from their phone, they're doing a guarding round, they're in an area where phones/trunkings/whatever aren't allowed, they're in the middle of a conversation with a client, they've already gone home and forgot to check out, whatever. In other words, these alarms don't get a really high priority - we'll usually wait at least 15 top 20 minutes so we don't make hundreds of useless calls.
Yesterday, an agent arrived, logged on, gave a life sign, keeled over. A colleague from the next building over happened to find him, blue and swollen. Whatever it's called, ruptured cardiac artery thingie. All help came too late...And the guy happened to be in an alarm for his life sign, but my colleagues hadn't checked in yet. Oops. aranoid: :tear:

 

[Cajungal]

^I knowwww, it's ridiculous!

 

The self-loathing is strong with this one.

 

[DarkAudit]

I swear I could feel Zen raaage from here yesterday when the news reported that the LAPD had shut down the 101 and other freeways for the benefit of the Jackson funeral procession.

 

[Jake]

My mother went to the hospital for gallstone surgery and was told she couldn't have it, because she was apparently 5 months pregnant with my little brother.

EDIT: This goes along with the prior discussion and should not be construed as a new rant on a current situation. :retard:

 

[wana10]

what happens when you tell your university you want to take more credits next term? they bump you from resident to non-resident status...fucking pricks. if my appeal doesn't go through expect me back here. :explode:

 

[Cajungal]

Seriously... again.... this music some cell phone services use instead of actual ringing is getting old.

"Smack That" and "Hanging By a Moment" today. I haven't heard the latter in years, and that was just fine with me. What's wrong with "ring ring" you damn kids?!

I'm actually not mad at all... barely annoyed. I just think it's a stupid feature to have on a phone... imposing your crappy music on the people who call you.

 

[Gusto]

Seriously... again.... this music some cell phone services use instead of actual ringing is getting old.

"Smack That" and "Hanging By a Moment" today. I haven't heard the latter in years, and that was just fine with me. What's wrong with "ring ring" you damn kids?!

I'm actually not mad at all... barely annoyed. I just think it's a stupid feature to have on a phone... imposing your crappy music on the people who call you.

Vibrate, bitches. No one knows I'm getting a call but me. And it seriously weirds me out. I'm not used to getting called yet.

 

[DarkAudit]

Seriously... again.... this music some cell phone services use instead of actual ringing is getting old.

"Smack That" and "Hanging By a Moment" today. I haven't heard the latter in years, and that was just fine with me. What's wrong with "ring ring" you damn kids?!

I'm actually not mad at all... barely annoyed. I just think it's a stupid feature to have on a phone... imposing your crappy music on the people who call you.

That'll all be over if ASCAP has their way. They consider ringtones "public performances", and they want their cut. No cut, no more ringtones. :eyeroll:

 

This rant takes some setting up.

First, last year at the end of the season our mower crapped out. So my parents gave me theirs, even though it was older than the one that I'd had.

This year comes and I try and start it. No dice. But it's a wet spring and the grass (and weeds) grow. We borrow the neighbor's mower (neighbor across the street - this is an important point) and get the front yard, but it's a pretty small mower and can't get the back yard. In the meantime, the back yard is being overrun by these pernicious weeds that came from a DIFFERENT neighbor's yard (to the South). So the back yard is a fricking jungle. I get a letter from the city telling me I have 7 days to cut it down or they would come in and charge me to do it. I call them and ask how much. $145. No problem, I says. That's perfect. Please come in and do so because I don't have the equipment to do it. The guy laughed and was very, very nice about it. I was a little annoyed at the neighbors (to the North) who turned us in because they've never once offered to help us out. They have the equipment to do so, but helping us? No way!

Anyway, so I get a letter yesterday about the status of our pool. It gives us 7 days to fix all the issues with it or they will come in and take it.

Here's the list:

1) Before putting in a pool you have to have a permit.
2) Pools must have a fence or wall surrounded by a fence of no less than 48 inches.
3) Stagnant water is a mosquito breeding ground.
4) Emptying pool water into the street is verboten. Must use a drain in the house.

I called the number provided to point out the following:

1) The pool was here when we moved in. I'll need to get a permit, but I didn't know I needed one.
2) Our yard is totally fenced in.
3) We've already drained the pool as we haven't had the money to open it this year.
4) Oops. Didn't know that. Our neighbor (to the North) has always just put in a hose & drained his. I followed suit. Didn't know that was bad. Won't do it again.

Or at least I called to TRY and point this all out. The guy was a fucking prick. He could give a shit about anything I had to say. So unless I get a new fence put in on half of my back yard (apparently the fence on part of it is 46 inches, not 48) they'll take my pool. Initially he said I had until the 23rd, but because of my pay schedule he's given me until the 8th of August.

My neighbors to the North (the ones who started all of this shit) have just taken out their pool (in-ground) and are planning on getting a new one. If they do the city is going to be called any time they have water in it or are draining it into the street. These people have called on our cars (not being moved for a week - I was driving the good car and just hadn't driven it), constantly park in front of our driveway and now are the reason our pool will have to be taken down because we do not have the money to get a new fence.

Dicks.

 

[Frank]

So I just about got murdered last night. It was pretty wicked. Got called into a domestic disturbance in town. Had to go alone, the only other guy on shift with me had to go out to one of the reserves half an hour out of town so it was just me covering the town (YAY STAFF SHORTAGES!). I get there and the two are screaming at each other like retarded howler monkeys. Not a big deal. Happens all the time in this depressed little hell hole what with the lumber mills shutting down and the oil fields out for summer and not likely coming back next winter.

I get out of my vehicle, ask both people to calm down and the woman runs at me and starts screaming that the man hit her, was threatening her child, is a lying, cheating prick...etc, etc, etc. So, I try to get her to calm down as best I can when she starts screaming at her boyfriend to put his fucking knife away and I turn around to see him brandishing his knife walking towards me. This never should have happened. I never should have let the guy out of my sight for an instant, but I was tired and it had been a long night up to this point. I made a rookie mistake and almost got knifed. I hate having to pull my gun, but fuck this, it was out and it took all the self control I had not to pistol whip the guy. I know, once again, I was exhausted and in need of some real sleep. Anyways, he was arrested, is going up on A LOT of charges and well, thanks to this little stunt, I won't be having to deal with him for a long time. He's totally getting remanded. There's no way he got any sort of bail.

The bad part is all the paperwork I now have to do.

And the almost getting my throat slit, stabbed, whatever he intended to do. That sucked too.

 

So I just about got murdered last night. It was pretty wicked. Got called into a domestic disturbance in town. Had to go alone, the only other guy on shift with me had to go out to one of the reserves half an hour out of town so it was just me covering the town (YAY STAFF SHORTAGES!). I get there and the two are screaming at each other like retarded howler monkeys. Not a big deal. Happens all the time in this depressed little hell hole what with the lumber mills shutting down and the oil fields out for summer and not likely coming back next winter.

I get out of my vehicle, ask both people to calm down and the woman runs at me and starts screaming that the man hit her, was threatening her child, is a lying, cheating prick...etc, etc, etc. So, I try to get her to calm down as best I can when she starts screaming at her boyfriend to put his fucking knife away and I turn around to see him brandishing his knife walking towards me. This never should have happened. I never should have let the guy out of my sight for an instant, but I was tired and it had been a long night up to this point. I made a rookie mistake and almost got knifed. I hate having to pull my gun, but fuck this, it was out and it took all the self control I had not to pistol whip the guy. I know, once again, I was exhausted and in need of some real sleep. Anyways, he was arrested, is going up on A LOT of charges and well, thanks to this little stunt, I won't be having to deal with him for a long time. He's totally getting remanded. There's no way he got any sort of bail.

The bad part is all the paperwork I now have to do.

And the almost getting my throat slit, stabbed, whatever he intended to do. That sucked too.

Fuck! Want a pool? My rant seems so quaint now.

 

[Frank]

If it wouldn't likely end up a piss/vomit hole for drunks. I would totally take you up on it.

 

[Cajungal]

I'm glad you're ok.

 

[Lally]

Seriously... again.... this music some cell phone services use instead of actual ringing is getting old.

"Smack That" and "Hanging By a Moment" today. I haven't heard the latter in years, and that was just fine with me. What's wrong with "ring ring" you damn kids?!

I'm actually not mad at all... barely annoyed. I just think it's a stupid feature to have on a phone... imposing your crappy music on the people who call you.

That'll all be over if ASCAP has their way. They consider ringtones "public performances", and they want their cut. No cut, no more ringtones. :eyeroll:

I'm guessing CG is talking about what you hear when you call someone, not what you hear when you get a call, but since you're talking about ringtones -- how could that ever, ever be enforced? Yeah, you can force cell phone companies to take them off their site, and you can even take down the ringtone websites, but when cell phones can play any mp3 as a ringtone, how can you stop them from playing songs?

 

[Cajungal]

Yeah, Lally, that's exactly what I'm talking about. You call someone, and instead of ringing you hear: "Please enjoy the selection while we contact your party." Then my ears are violated with some song I don't want to hear. It's just a pointless service to me. Ringtones make more sense, because you get to hear the music as you're being called. It just seems silly to sign up for this, however. It's such a gamble. You could either treat someone with a song they like or torment them. So far my ears have never gotten treated... just raped by poor-quality songs.

 

[DarkAudit]

Seriously... again.... this music some cell phone services use instead of actual ringing is getting old.

"Smack That" and "Hanging By a Moment" today. I haven't heard the latter in years, and that was just fine with me. What's wrong with "ring ring" you damn kids?!

I'm actually not mad at all... barely annoyed. I just think it's a stupid feature to have on a phone... imposing your crappy music on the people who call you.

That'll all be over if ASCAP has their way. They consider ringtones "public performances", and they want their cut. No cut, no more ringtones. :eyeroll:

I'm guessing CG is talking about what you hear when you call someone, not what you hear when you get a call, but since you're talking about ringtones -- how could that ever, ever be enforced? Yeah, you can force cell phone companies to take them off their site, and you can even take down the ringtone websites, but when cell phones can play any mp3 as a ringtone, how can you stop them from playing songs?

Ah. Yeah. Sprint calls those "call tones". You call someone, and instead of the standard tone, you get this "now enjoy this music courtesy of Sprint"

Since the RIAA and such like to pretend the Betamax ruling never happened, they consider any home copying to be "theft". Therefore by their reasoning, any mp3 used as a ringtone is stolen property.

 

[Lally]

I have always thought that "service" made no sense. If you like a song, why put it as the "ring" (I think they are called ringbacks?) on a number YOU WILL LIKELY NEVER CALL.

To add my own rant on a different topic -- my boy and I have been on a serious healthy eating kick lately, but Wednesday we decided to eat bad because it was our anniversary. We were supposed to go to one of our favorite restaurants for dinner (this delicious place: http://www.gordonbiersch.com), but we ate a ton of delicious sushi for lunch and were both still too full in the evening, so we settled for a light snack at home. I was pretty disappointed, but it didn't make sense to eat a bunch of fattening, pricey food when we weren't that hungry. Then, last night, my boyfriend asks me if I want to go then instead. I have a lot of willpower on my own normally, but when he encourages me it tends to go out the window. So, I say yes, we get ready to go, and as we're walking out the door, he says "I feel like I'm enabling you. Maybe we shouldn't go." I wouldn't have been mad -- except HE brought it up, not me, and then snatched it away at the last VERY LAST second. I told him this morning it was like holding a treat in a dog's face, then smacking the dog and walking away. He just laughed. rly:

Why are my rants always so petty? :bush:

 

[Cajungal]

So did y'all end up not going that night too? I'd have been annoyed at that too.

And I can identify with that enabling thing. Jake and I worked at that a lot in the past. We used to go really nuts on the weekends we saw each other, but since I started taking care of myself, he does too. Now if he'd just serve himself a human-sized portion of rice... he wonders why he always looks a little bloated. D'ah well, his tummy is cute.

 

[Lally]

I guess it would have been helpful if I was more clear. [embarrassed face that was TAKEN FROM MEEEE] We ended up staying home. All in all it's good, because we're going out both tonight and tomorrow night for drinking, which is not exactly a low-calorie activity, but if he just had never suggested it in the first place, it would have saved me some aggravation. rly:

 

[Krisken]

Yeah, Lally, that's exactly what I'm talking about. You call someone, and instead of ringing you hear: "Please enjoy the selection while we contact your party." Then my ears are violated with some song I don't want to hear. It's just a pointless service to me. Ringtones make more sense, because you get to hear the music as you're being called. It just seems silly to sign up for this, however. It's such a gamble. You could either treat someone with a song they like or torment them. So far my ears have never gotten treated... just raped by poor-quality songs.

My brother-in-law has this and the last time I called him I was forced to listen to Guns and Roses. What a dick.

 

[CynicismKills]

Yeah, Lally, that's exactly what I'm talking about. You call someone, and instead of ringing you hear: "Please enjoy the selection while we contact your party." Then my ears are violated with some song I don't want to hear. It's just a pointless service to me. Ringtones make more sense, because you get to hear the music as you're being called. It just seems silly to sign up for this, however. It's such a gamble. You could either treat someone with a song they like or torment them. So far my ears have never gotten treated... just raped by poor-quality songs.

My brother-in-law has this and the last time I called him I was forced to listen to Guns and Roses. What a dick.

WERCUM TO DA JUNGER, WE GAT FUNIN GAAAAAAYMES

WE GAT EVRYTHIN YWAN WIGGABUGGADEE BUGGIN BLAMES

 

[Cajungal]

Tuna was a bad decision.

 

[ThatGrinningIdiot!]

So I just about got murdered last night. It was pretty wicked. Got called into a domestic disturbance in town. Had to go alone, the only other guy on shift with me had to go out to one of the reserves half an hour out of town so it was just me covering the town (YAY STAFF SHORTAGES!). I get there and the two are screaming at each other like retarded howler monkeys. Not a big deal. Happens all the time in this depressed little * hole what with the lumber mills shutting down and the oil fields out for summer and not likely coming back next winter.

I get out of my vehicle, ask both people to calm down and the woman runs at me and starts screaming that the man hit her, was threatening her child, is a lying, cheating *...etc, etc, etc. So, I try to get her to calm down as best I can when she starts screaming at her boyfriend to put his smurfing knife away and I turn around to see him brandishing his knife walking towards me. This never should have happened. I never should have let the guy out of my sight for an instant, but I was tired and it had been a long night up to this point. I made a rookie mistake and almost got knifed. I hate having to pull my gun, but smurf this, it was out and it took all the self control I had not to pistol whip the guy. I know, once again, I was exhausted and in need of some real sleep. Anyways, he was arrested, is going up on A LOT of charges and well, thanks to this little stunt, I won't be having to deal with him for a long time. He's totally getting remanded. There's no way he got any sort of bail.

The bad part is all the paperwork I now have to do.

And the almost getting my throat slit, stabbed, whatever he intended to do. That sucked too.

What town do you work in Frankie? It sounds alot like where I live. (reservation)
I've had knives pulled on me, and even a loaded gun pointed at my face. I'd say I was close to being murdered about two times now. I'm not even an officer of the law!

 

[CynicismKills]

Tuna was a bad decision.

MILK WAS A BAD CHOICE