Whine like a baby, now with 500% more drama!

Cajungal

Staff member
I just want to be able to drink a regular amount of drinks without feeling so wobbly. Canny hold it together and wash these damn dishs
 
Harrumph.

Want to get out of the house and out of town for a couple of hours, but rain and lots of it is bearing down on every intended route.
 
That really sucks. And the cat probably thought it was being helpful.

Well, that takes the wind out of my whine. Just finished cleaning the rat cage, took a shower, came out to hear them fussing around and eating. I thought "good, everything's going well." Then I hear what sounds like a rain of seeds. I go to the cage and see the big one has tipped over the just-filled food dish, spilling dog food and seeds down the ramp, on the platforms, the fleece, the hammocks. -_- Little asshole.
 
Remember when Erfworld was a comic, and not just text? *sigh*
Right? I read the first two written stories and now I'm putting it on hiatus. I'll come back to it every so often to check for a comic, but until then I've kinda given up on it. I don't care about all these ancillary characters from Erfworld history.
 

fade

Staff member
It has happened. In my kids' eyes, my jokes have transitioned from funny to Dad Jokes. They didn't think that "buttella" was a funny euphemism for poo.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
The thing about Dad jokes is... well, you want your kids to laugh, right? But you don't want them to be mean and cynical, so you can't tell mean spirited jokes. When they're little, you can't really tell them dirty jokes, and things like political humor go over their heads. Slapstick only gets you so far until somebody gets hurt. Obviously you can't tell them blonde jokes or polish jokes because you don't want them to be sexist or racist. They don't have enough life experience to really be impressed with irony very much.

So what's left?

Puns. That's it. And that's why Dads get Dad jokes.
 
I feel horrible today. Headache, upset stomach and general blahs. The one day a week that I allow myself to sleep late and I was up at 6am feeling crappy.
 
It has happened. In my kids' eyes, my jokes have transitioned from funny to Dad Jokes. They didn't think that "buttella" was a funny euphemism for poo.
If it makes you feel any better, they were probably never funny. Your kids were just too young to realize.
 
I am so fucking bored and unmotivated. Urg. There are things I should/could do... and instead... nothing. Well, now forum-ing, I guess.

It has happened. In my kids' eyes, my jokes have transitioned from funny to Dad Jokes. They didn't think that "buttella" was a funny euphemism for poo.
I love dad jokes.
 
Another Saturday night, and I ain't got nobody.
Cheeseman, I hate to say this, but if you keep focusing on this, week after week, women can tell. You go up to them, and it's going to come across, even if you don't think you're showing any desperation or despair. The problem isn't going to go away until you can focus on something else and stop noticing it.
 
I know, but like with everything else, it all just seems to snowball into each other. And when I honestly try to leave it behind and move on, and it seems like it only takes the littlest thing to pull me back into the pit. I've tried drugs, school, and work to get my mind off of the loneliness. They only help so much.
 
I know, but like with everything else, it all just seems to snowball into each other. And when I honestly try to leave it behind and move on, and it seems like it only takes the littlest thing to pull me back into the pit. I've tried drugs, school, and work to get my mind off of the loneliness. They only help so much.
I know it's difficult. I'm just saying. People had said it to me and I didn't get it. After getting dumped by my girlfriend in freshman year of college, I tried to get into relationships, eager to regain a connection, but got only rejections, until over time I got to a point where I said "Fuck it, I don't care", and that was genuinely how I felt. THEN I started meeting people and girls were interested. It's just how it is.

I hope it gets better for you.
 
This almost happened tonight, but the cost was too high.
Well, I'm sure the working ladies aren't all too costly. Shop around.

The thing about Dad jokes is... well, you want your kids to laugh, right? But you don't want them to be mean and cynical, so you can't tell mean spirited jokes. When they're little, you can't really tell them dirty jokes, and things like political humor go over their heads. Slapstick only gets you so far until somebody gets hurt. Obviously you can't tell them blonde jokes or polish jokes because you don't want them to be sexist or racist. They don't have enough life experience to really be impressed with irony very much.

So what's left?

Puns. That's it. And that's why Dads get Dad jokes.
Wait, we're not supposed to use cynical humor around kids? Or is it just the dads? Because I've been doing that around my cousins from age 3 to 12 of their lives (so far). (They call me a jerk, but they laugh.)

Actually, my dad would joke about political/topical stuff that went over mine and my sister's heads all the time. It was probably 15 years later that I actually learned who Joey Buttafuoco was.

It has happened. In my kids' eyes, my jokes have transitioned from funny to Dad Jokes. They didn't think that "buttella" was a funny euphemism for poo.
On top of the types Gas listed, there's also weird humor, what the kids these days call "random," but that can be hard to master. You could try that instead of puns.
 
"Absurdity."

--Patrick
You are not hip to the kid lingo, dizard*.

But yes, that's a better way to describe it, and I rely on being absurd a ton when I'm around children. Seems to work. It's less putting on an absurd act around them, and more hiding it when I'm out in public or at work.

In a related whine, I'm kind of tired of hearing "Why aren't you guys having a baby?" "When is it your turn to have a baby?" "You would make a great father, so why don't you guys go for it?" My hope is that my sister's kid being born in December will relieve me of any expectations there. We don't have good living quarters for raising a kid, we need to save up money so we could get a house, that will be all the harder if we already have a kid, and honestly, while we could maybe, MAYBE shake it money-wise with some help, time-wise I just don't know if I'm ready to give up our free time or freedom to have sex whenever we want yet. Then there's the conundrum of my wife's medication conflicting with the presence of any fetus.

I'd rather just hit 40 and adopt a kid. Not even a baby; like a 6-year-old or something who would really like a good home with loving, albeit bizarre parents. I'm not sure we're allowed to do that if we're not Christian; I know some adoption agencies put a high emphasis on that sort of thing, but we'll see.



*dizard is middle school slang for "internet person".
 

GasBandit

Staff member
You are not hip to the kid lingo, dizard*.

But yes, that's a better way to describe it, and I rely on being absurd a ton when I'm around children. Seems to work. It's less putting on an absurd act around them, and more hiding it when I'm out in public or at work.

In a related whine, I'm kind of tired of hearing "Why aren't you guys having a baby?" "When is it your turn to have a baby?" "You would make a great father, so why don't you guys go for it?" My hope is that my sister's kid being born in December will relieve me of any expectations there. We don't have good living quarters for raising a kid, we need to save up money so we could get a house, that will be all the harder if we already have a kid, and honestly, while we could maybe, MAYBE shake it money-wise with some help, time-wise I just don't know if I'm ready to give up our free time or freedom to have sex whenever we want yet. Then there's the conundrum of my wife's medication conflicting with the presence of any fetus.

I'd rather just hit 40 and adopt a kid. Not even a baby; like a 6-year-old or something who would really like a good home with loving, albeit bizarre parents. I'm not sure we're allowed to do that if we're not Christian; I know some adoption agencies put a high emphasis on that sort of thing, but we'll see.



*dizard is middle school slang for "internet person".
 

fade

Staff member
I wasn't really complaining about my joke not going over. My favorite words from my kids are "dad stop you're embarassing."
 
Never got my fruity drinks last night. At work today for catch up and inventory. Want to drink but no go as I live in a blue law state. :(
 

fade

Staff member
Ugh. I was accused of being a conservative because I asked on lifehacker how 20 somethings always seem to be able to afford expensive camping and biking gear. I said I make a nice salary and I know I can't. I was genuinely curious. But apparently I am a card carrying conservative who believes in liberal elitism. Internet, you so crazy. I did mention I worked for oil and I did make fun of 1200 dollar canondales hanging on 300 dollar Saris bike racks on the back of Subarus.
 
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It's because you have a family with kids. I'm sure I make a lot less than you but something like 75% of my post-tax income is disposable.
 
I hate the colour of my office at home. It's a sort of dirty dusty green (w/a lot of yellow and brown-ish tones in it too). Kinda mossy, which I usually like, but it's driving me nuts.
I really want to paint it, but I have one wall covered in books, which I really don't wanna take down and move, and I don't know what colour to go with! I kinda want to do purple, but if I went with blue, I could use the same colour to touch up the guest bedroom (which also could use some updating), and if I did a periwinkle (purple-ish blue-ish) I could do both rooms as well... but I'm thinking of doing the master bedroom blue-ish, and don't wanna over do it on blue. Or I could go red, but the secondary bathrooms are red, and red's pretty vivid for a work space. And Eriol's office is already bright emerald green, and I have no intention of patining anything else that colour. But I also don't want every room to be a different colour because that looks really disjointed. Arg.

So, what colour should I paint my office?
 
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