Whine like a baby, now with 500% more drama!
- Thread starter strawman
- Start date
Cajungal
Staff member
This is such a stupid problem. I just want to veg out at home tonight and finish my book. Mom just texted me that she has extra tickets to a really good jazz show in town. I know I should stop being such a lump and go out and have fun, but my book and ukulele are calling my name.... I still have 4 hours to decide...
GasBandit
Staff member
Go with your mother.
You can never tell how many years before you might really, really wish you did.
Cajungal
Staff member
No she's not going--she's got something else to do tonight. I'd be going alone, which I don't mind.
GasBandit
Staff member
Oh, never mind then - eh flip a coin. Lump being is fun.
If that's the case, I vote for stay home and chill.
fade
Staff member
I saw that you had gotten a sound recorder, and I thought, "That's silly, he should've gotten...oh, what's the model, again?"
And then I searched for it.
And then I recognized it as the same one you already got.
Carry on, then...
--Patrick
Cajungal
Staff member
I'm sorry
Cuddling does make everything better. I had had a similar week. Jake had doubles from Sunday to Friday and and i didn't speak to him in person at all until last night. Most nights we can have dinner together or he'll at least come in early enough to hang out with me while I'm settling in for the night. Being off that routine felt weird.
I'm tired of stomachaches and I'm no longer going eating the stuff my wife orders from obscure places online. Whoever heard of Papa John's? That ain't my dad.
He was Pope 'till 2005. Sheesh, learn something about the world, why don't ya.
We used to love papa johns pizza in Texas. The one up here is really greasy and gives me a stomach ache too.
It makes me sad that it is the best thin crust pizza I've found on this island.
GasBandit
Staff member
So... I found out today my family has been holding out on bad news, not telling me about things. I guess I can understand a little, that they were trying to spare me when I have been having it so rough lately. But when something finally happens that you flat out can't leave somebody out of the loop on, like great aunt Pearl dying, and you have to call me and tell me about it and when the funeral is (ironically, the funeral is on my birthday next week), it's going to lead to a conversation that's going to let all the stored up bad news come flooding out. No, I didn't know about cousin Shawn's marriage. No, I didn't know about grandpa's hip replacement surgery being put on hold because they found a growth in his bladder. In fact I didn't know he was getting hip replacement surgery! No, I didn't know aunt Cathy had parkinsons and it had advanced to the point where she couldn't take care of herself, much less uncle Herb, who by the way has no short term memory left to speak of and whose diabetes was running out of control. No, I didn't know my father's eyes were getting worse again. That's a whole lot to take in in one conversation. But thanks for the call, grandma. Love you too.
My mom does it to me too. I'll ask her if anything's going on, she always says nothing. Ask my aunt, she tells me everything that has gone on ... and was told by my mom before my conversation with my mom.
Sorry, Gas.
Sorry, Gas.
GasBandit
Staff member
Well, I guess it's good he got married, but I'm bummed I didn't merit knowing about it, much less an invitation. Shawn and I were pretty tight when we were younger. I didn't realize it'd been that long or that we'd apparently drifted apart that far.Is cousin Shawn getting married a bad thing, or is the marriage falling apart?
Sorry, inquisitive mind.
That said, yeah, sorry
My mom will call and tell me the stupidest crap on the planet, like how the Hallmark store got in something cute the kids would love (if they were still babies, but I can't say that to her). Then I'll find out 2 weeks after the fact that my dad had to go to the doctor because he's been having some kind of health issue, "Oh? I didn't tell you that?"
Holy Snarf your birthday is this Saturday!
GasBandit
Staff member
Yep. Gonna be a grand old time. I wasn't actually all that close to great aunt Pearl, but the few times we met she was nice to me and it's just the decent thing to do to be there for her descendants, my very extended family, especially given that it's only about a 4 hour drive to Abilene.
This has been me, my entire life. No one thought it was important to tell me... well, anything because they thought I couldn't handle it with my depression and anxiety issues. Cue being told about funerals THEN being told people have been sick for months and that they didn't think I could handle it.
My aunt recently got her leg amputated because of her diabetes, me and my mother are visiting her and her family. I am really worried about her grandson, my aunt and my uncle practically raise him because his mother is a damn child.
My relationship is more more and more of a struggle and less and less fun. I know a relationship requires hard work, but it's becoming more of a battle "against one another" than one of "us against the world". I was home all week, did a bunch of little odd jobs, did some small things around the house, did some house work, played a bunch of games. Every day after she'd get home from work, we argued. Every day. She's frazzled, so am I. Heck, today we had a fight before she even left for work. It seems we both like each other from afar - over the phone, in texts - but together at home we're constantly bickering and at odds. I'm socially inept, slightly autistic, I work far too much and this one week doesn't even put a dent in the time I have to recuperate. I'm an abuse victim (oh who didn't know that thread was me), I have agression issues, I recently stopped smoking, and my body's half-way falling apart (I'm 30 and taking medication for my prostate, my blood pressure, the anger management stuff, weekly physical therapy for my back, I'm bald, full of cysts in practically every joint). I just don't seem to be able to cope anymore with anything she says or does. And I'm aware she's got it hard too - she's recently started a new job, she's got physical issues of her own (which, given their nature, I won't throw out in a public forum), self esteem issues over having gained a bunch of weight (my medication making me less sexually interested doesn't help either, even though I've assured her that's nothing to do with her but in general - I'm not even looking at porn anymore!), she has to deal with, well, me, she used to be active and outgoing and she feels shut in at times, she misses her family who all live over an hour away and don't seem inclined to come here at all, if we do'nt go there we just don't see them,... But it just isn't working now, and it hasn't been, for a while. Every day is a fight, every little thing an argument. Sometimes her fault, more often mine, but every little thing leads to explosions and exagerated statements - yesterday we had a 20 minute shouting match because she asked me to pick up some extra vegetables in the shop, which is nothing short of ridiculous! Day before we had an argument because the drill holes I filled up in the bedroom wall and painted over had little cracks in them - it was a job "badly done and I'd need to do it again" - though afterwards she said I did it "for myself" and not "for her" and the holes didn't bother her anyway! And so on - she doesn't seem to be able to cope anymore either.
And yes, I'm in therapy, and yes, in Mexico we're off on vacation, and if we make it there I guess we'll be fine or so, but i'm just seriously wondering how we're going to make it through this here and now and return to some normalcy in life. All I ask is for her to take into account some of my desires or requests - I ask specifically not to be disturbed in the shower, which doesn't stop her from having come into the bathroom while I was showering 3 times this week for tiny little unimportant things that coudl've waited till I got out. I ask for no new information or new tasks the last half hour or so before bed so I can turn off my mind and mentally prepare for the new day - ask me new stuff inthe morning if you must. Doesn't mean she didn't tell me to ick up those stupid bell peppers at 1 am as we were both undressed and practically in bed. It's stupid little things but they make me feel completely unrespected and like she doesn't even listen to my side of things. And I know I'm rambling and I know it's all just crap but I needed to vent, and this is the whine thread, so sue me, I'm whining. Gah!
And yes, I'm in therapy, and yes, in Mexico we're off on vacation, and if we make it there I guess we'll be fine or so, but i'm just seriously wondering how we're going to make it through this here and now and return to some normalcy in life. All I ask is for her to take into account some of my desires or requests - I ask specifically not to be disturbed in the shower, which doesn't stop her from having come into the bathroom while I was showering 3 times this week for tiny little unimportant things that coudl've waited till I got out. I ask for no new information or new tasks the last half hour or so before bed so I can turn off my mind and mentally prepare for the new day - ask me new stuff inthe morning if you must. Doesn't mean she didn't tell me to ick up those stupid bell peppers at 1 am as we were both undressed and practically in bed. It's stupid little things but they make me feel completely unrespected and like she doesn't even listen to my side of things. And I know I'm rambling and I know it's all just crap but I needed to vent, and this is the whine thread, so sue me, I'm whining. Gah!
Since I always have a hard time staying calm when talking in person, trying to type out a letter with everything and the way i see it - our problems, my issues, her issues, what works, what doesn't. I'm nowhere near don and over 4 pages in small type. Dammit. I've become Rachel from Friends! 