[Question] What's your favorite punchline?

[Fun Size]

I know we have a What's your favorite joke? thread, but I am, for personal reasons, casting a wider net here. From across all media, what are the lines that made you laugh out loud when you heard them? I'm looking for books, poems, movies, songs, jokes...whatever. If you want to put sources in spoiler tags, we can even make a game out of figuring out where they come from.

Examples:
"And they was right."
"This man has no dick."
"No one's gonna eat your eyes."
"Practice!"

 

[bhamv3]

"The brick!"

 

[strawman]

"...and so they tasered her again."

 

[Chad Sexington]

"Yes, and I'm shouting his name to celebrate that fact."

 

[Ravenpoe]

Rectum? Damn near killed 'im!

 

[Gared]

"<leans forward, looks around furtively.>"

 

[ThatNickGuy]

And that, kids, is why you never name an ulcer after Charlie Don't Surf.

 

[BananaHands]

"Knock Knock?"
"Who's there?""
"To."
"To Who?"

Spoiler

"No, it's to WHOM."

 

[General Specific]

Better Nate than Lever!

 

[filmfanatic]

"Oh, I thought you said sarsaparilla!"

 

[strawman]

"Okay, now what?"

 

[Charlie Don't Surf]

The Aristocrats!

 

[fade]

"when she sits around the house, she really sits around the house"

 

[GasBandit]

$40, same as in town!

 

[drawn_inward]

"Would I? Would I?"
"Hare lip"!

 

[sixpackshaker]

No, it is just some ice cream.

 

[strawman]

Unique up on it.
Tame way, unique up on it.

 

[sixpackshaker]

Pass it? I don't think I could swallow it![DOUBLEPOST=1371749519][/DOUBLEPOST]People these days, I just don't understand them. Take my wife... PLEASE!

 

[Gusto]

Thanks, Obama.

 

[Azurephoenix]

"I'd buy that for a dollar!"

 

[sixpackshaker]

It's twue... it's twue...[DOUBLEPOST=1371755417][/DOUBLEPOST]Have you ever seen a grown man naked?

 

[Anonymous]

The Bible.

 

[GasBandit]

Well aren't we mister original-and-edgy-pants.

 

[Fun Size]

That's clearly not a punch line, although in their defense, I've been having trouble getting literary references. It's hard to pick one line that really got to me in a book, although "I understood that!" from Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff is a clear contender.

 

[Chad Sexington]

Well aren't we mister original-and-edgy-pants.

Hey at least he was brave enough to own it.

 

[Fun Size]

Now that's a punch line!

 

[Ravenpoe]

Hey at least he was brave enough to own it.

That was actually mine, and I have no idea why it was posted anonymously.

 

[Jay]

Therapists.

A SNL sketch ruined it for me. Whenever someone says the rapists, I can't help but laugh at the punchline.

It's been years... if not a decade or more.

 

[Charlie Don't Surf]

I still name most of my fantasy sports teams "The Pen is Mightier" and laugh at it all the time

 

[sixpackshaker]

"Now spell the fuck in chocolate ice cream."

 

[Dave]

"You're not here for the hunting, are you?"

"A pilot, you fucking racist!"

 

[GasBandit]

"When you take that thing out, it better have numbers on it."

 

[sixpackshaker]

"Because God knows you can't wear glasses."

 

[HCGLNS]

As god as my witness,...I thought turkeys could fly.

 

[blotsfan]

He gave me the winning numbers!