Funny Pictures Thread. It begins again

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I known there's a (silver age?) comic where some guys are trying to guess Superman's secret identity, and they almost get it but he fakes them out ("that was a close one!"), or something, and the last panel is of one of the guys being sent to the store for candy and cigarettes, but I couldn't find an image of that panel specifically. So you'll have to use your imagination.

--Patrick
 
It's like that scene in Death Becomes Her where Bruce Willis's character reveals the secret to his realistic funeral preparations.

--Patrick
(disclaimer: I have not yet seen Death Becomes Her)
 
I tried to find the scene on YouTube but couldn't.
00:21:45 Can l ask you what your secret is?
00:21:48 Spray paint.
00:21:52 You see, you can´t just use regular makeup on dead skin.
00:21:57 The pores are too dry.
--Patrick
 
Oh I'm not worried about my browser history. I browse in private mode. But there's a certain external hard disk, hidden underneath a large pile of papers inside a binder labeled "tax info", buried in the very back of my bottom desk drawer, which I usually keep locked. I'd appreciate someone grinding this hard disk into dust.
 
Oh I'm not worried about my browser history. I browse in private mode. But there's a certain external hard disk, hidden underneath a large pile of papers inside a binder labeled "tax info", buried in the very back of my bottom desk drawer, which I usually keep locked. I'd appreciate someone grinding this hard disk into dust.
PHRASING

--Patrick
 
Then you should leave that info with your wife. You'll be dead either way. :D
Oh no, she'd be tempted to plug it in and see what's on it. And she might open the "R" folder, and then she'll declare that our marriage was null because, apparently, this is what her husband had thought consummation meant.
 
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