[Brazelton] Michelle McNamara - crime blogger and Patton Oswalt's wife

Bubble181

Bubble181

Zero Esc said:
I think steinman has a good point. For convenience sake, we have a movie news thread, when sometimes movies merit their own thread and don't get them. Same with some video games; that forum is like three threads constantly updating, with not much other traffic because all significance goes under the Video Game News. Some threads I think it makes sense (what movie did you last see, the rant threads) but when stuff comes up, instead of finding its place in the random thread, it might be worth using the New Post function, even if it ends up being a thread that dies in a week or so.
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It's a self-reinforcing cycle thing, though. Because there are so few active threads, the threshold for new threads is higher. Plus, some of us may feel whatever they post isn't worth a separate thread, anyway. I know I tend to feel that way.
 
Bubble181

Bubble181

I really, really hate the new Imgur system. I can't open the album on Imgur itself, I can't resize this to actually get the full text. Can't read the last part of the first message, can't read the last bit of the second...*sigh*
 
CynicismKills

CynicismKills

Bubble181 said:
I really, really hate the new Imgur system. I can't open the album on Imgur itself, I can't resize this to actually get the full text. Can't read the last part of the first message, can't read the last bit of the second...*sigh*
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Imgur's "upgrade" was definitely a case of fixing what wasn't broken.
 
PatrThom

PatrThom

Dei said:
It's on Facebook, just search... My link was weird. Trying again.




Sorry if you're using Tapatalk, I can't get it to NOT auto media embed.
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All I see is a big empty blank space.
I'm inclined to believe it's my browser.

--Patrick
 
Bubble181

Bubble181

Thanks, grief.
Thanks for making depression look like the buzzing little bully it always was. Depression is the tallest kid in the 4th grade, dinging rubber bands off the back of your head and feeling safe on the playground, knowing that no teacher is coming to help you.
But grief? Grief is Jason Statham holding that 4th grade bully's head in a toilet and then fucking the teacher you've got a crush on in front of the class. Grief makes depression cower behind you and apologize for being such a dick.
If you spend 102 days completely focused on ONE thing you can achieve miracles. Make a film, write a novel, get MMA ripped, kick heroin, learn a language, travel around the world. Fall in love with someone. Get 'em to love you back.
But 102 days at the mercy of grief and loss feels like 102 years and you have shit to show for it. You will not be physically healthier. You will not feel "wiser." You will not have "closure." You will not have "perspective" or "resilience" or "a new sense of self." You WILL have solid knowledge of fear, exhaustion and a new appreciation for the randomness and horror of the universe. And you'll also realize that 102 days is nothing but a warm-up for things to come.
And...
You will have been shown new levels of humanity and grace and intelligence by your family and friends. They will show up for you, physically and emotionally, in ways which make you take careful note, and say to yourself, "Make sure to try to do that for someone else someday." Complete strangers will send you genuinely touching messages on Facebook and Twitter, or will somehow figure out your address to send you letters which you'll keep and re-read 'cause you can't believe how helpful they are. And, if you're a parent? You'll wish you were your kid's age, because the way they embrace despair and joy are at a purer level that you're going to have to reconnect with, to reach backwards through years of calcified cynicism and ironic detachment.
Lose your cool, and you're saved.
Michelle McNamara got yanked off the planet and out of life 102 days ago. She left behind an amazing unfinished book, about a horrific series of murders that everyone -- including the retired homicide detectives she worked with -- was sure she'd solve. The Golden State Killer. She gave him that name, in an article for Los Angeles Magazine. She was going to figure out the real name behind it.
She left Alice, her 7 year-old daughter. But not before putting the best parts of her into Alice, like beautiful music burned onto a CD and sent out into the void on a spaceship.
And she left me. 102 days into this.
I was face-down and frozen for weeks. It's 102 days later and I can confidently say I have reached a point where I'm crawling. Which, objectively, is an improvement. Maybe 102 days later I'll be walking.
Any spare energy I've managed to summon since April 21st I've put toward finishing Michelle's book. With a lot of help from some very amazing people. It will come out. I will let you know. It's all her. We're just taking what's there and letting it tell us how to shape it. It's amazing.
And I'm going to start telling jokes again soon. And writing. And acting in stuff and making things I like and working with friends on projects and do all the stuff I was always so privileged to get to do before the air caught fire around me and the sun died. It's all I knew how to do before I met Michelle. I don't know what else I'm supposed to do now without her.
And not because, "It's what Michelle would have wanted me to do." For me to even presume to know what Michelle would have wanted me to do is the height of arrogance on my part. That was one of the many reasons I so looked forward to growing old with her. Because she was always surprising me. Because I never knew what she'd think or what direction she'd go.
Okay, I'll start being funny again soon. What other choice do I have? Reality is in a death spiral and we seem to be living in a cackling, looming nightmare-swamp. We're all being dragged into a shadow-realm of doom by hateful lunatics who are determined to send our planet careening into oblivion.
Hey, there's that smile I was missing!
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Gruebeard

Gruebeard

fade said:
Clicking the imgur logo takes me to the album on Imgur. Doesn't work for you?
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Thank you. It used to be the little gear in the top right corner, but that stopped working and I never thought to click the top left.[DOUBLEPOST=1470158679,1470158488][/DOUBLEPOST]. . . Except on my tablet, imgur wont load anything for me :facepalm:
 
fade

fade

Staff member
Here he is winning an Emmy last night:



An odd thing for him to say, I must admit, given his fairly vocal stance as an atheist.
 
Denbrought

Denbrought

fade said:
Here he is winning an Emmy last night:



An odd thing for him to say, I must admit, given his fairly vocal stance as an atheist.
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You can think the cake is a lie while also wishing you could have a slice. Not every atheist is of the Hitchens type, yannow :)
 
Gruebeard

Gruebeard

AshburnerX said:
I've met many an atheist who would love to be wrong about the whole Heaven thing. They don't believe it's true, but they'd love to be wrong.
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Aye. I'm rather certain it ain't true, and I'd certainly love to be wrong.


I might also say something like he did, because the people I'm talking to can relate to the comment, and the "I hope" bit is a bit of gallows humour.
 
fade

fade

Staff member
I get your points, but "I hope" is stronger than "I wish" or "It'd sure be nice" to my ears.
 
strawman

strawman

Hope isn't just a desire, but an expression of expectation, so it's a bit stronger than wish. In fact if he had used wish it would have implied that he expects it not to be true.

Both express desire, but each have opposite expectations.

But on the other hand you can believe there is something after life and yet not believe in a higher power or deity.

Keep in mind also that atheism isn't a single belief system. In relation to an afterlife you might be able to say that most atheists would only agree that you shouldn't live your life based on a belief of an afterlife. I don't know how many would assert that there is no afterlife - you can't prove a negative after all - but few would shout down a man who has lost a loved one for their hope.
 
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