The Dream Thread

So, the new year of crippling school stress is upon us, and with it has come a sudden resurgence of nightmares. While the one I had last week was disturbing but silly to recount, the one two nights ago was delightfully terrifying.

I was in bed watching a documentary about people that were found after drowning with my wife, and as it went on, I realized that the bed we were on was floating in water. At the edge of the bed, a corpse was floating next me, complete with eyeless sockets and drawn back lips exposing yellowed teeth. I was trying to find something to use to push it away when I realized one of its hands was resting on the bed, and I could hear the fingers scratching against the mattress, but I couldn't tell if it was actually moving or if it was the water rocking it back and forth. Either way, it kept getting closer and closer right until I woke up.

So yeah, fuck that scene entirely.
 

fade

Staff member
I had this weird dream that I was God, and the dream's plot was basically a rom-com. I remember being concerned that my divine omnipotence looked like hokey special effects, and because of decades of conditioning into thinking that look meant low production values, no one would believe who I was.
 
I had this weird dream that I was God, and the dream's plot was basically a rom-com. I remember being concerned that my divine omnipotence looked like hokey special effects, and because of decades of conditioning into thinking that look meant low production values, no one would believe who I was.
What did Ashera look like? Salma Hayek?
 
I had a dream that on November 9th, right wing militia assholes decided to protest Trump's resounding defeat by shooting up the college I work at "cuz that's where they turn people in them educated liberal queers". The college's lockdown plan essentially pooled most of the students in a few large common areas that weren't even remotely secured, and these guys didn't just have small arms, looking out a window I saw 4 trucks in the lot with mounted machineguns (M60, Browning .30 cal) laying down fire on anyone using the exits.
 
I had one where I was in a city, that was half shadow, half light, and in the middle of it was a medium sized to large hotel style building. I then go into a sort of tram style elevator that went by ceilings but could also go up and down. From what I remember of the dialogue they were filming a movie and I was watching it, and all throughout it they mention that the lion in the hotel is sick. I wake up before seeing the lion.
 

fade

Staff member
I had a dream that on November 9th, right wing militia assholes decided to protest Trump's resounding defeat by shooting up the college I work at "cuz that's where they turn people in them educated liberal queers". The college's lockdown plan essentially pooled most of the students in a few large common areas that weren't even remotely secured, and these guys didn't just have small arms, looking out a window I saw 4 trucks in the lot with mounted machineguns (M60, Browning .30 cal) laying down fire on anyone using the exits.
You have the gift of clairvoyance!
 
I don't remember my dream, except that part of it convinced me to turn off my alarm without actually waking up. Luckily routine kicked in and I woke up in a panic 5 minutes later.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Last night I dreamed I went into a public restroom to take a whiz. I went into a stall, started doing my business, and then the wall in front of me just... wasn't there anymore. Instead was just an open gap looking out into a busy shopping mall, right adjacent to the inside of the entrance. People walking by, noticing me. I frowned mightily and PISSED HARDER. To assert dominance. Made eye contact with every one I could. And they started turning and running.

I am just so, SO glad that I didn't piss myself for real in my bed.
 
Last night I dreamed I went into a public restroom to take a whiz. I went into a stall, started doing my business, and then the wall in front of me just... wasn't there anymore. Instead was just an open gap looking out into a busy shopping mall, right adjacent to the inside of the entrance. People walking by, noticing me. I frowned mightily and PISSED HARDER. To assert dominance. Made eye contact with every one I could. And they started turning and running.

I am just so, SO glad that I didn't piss myself for real in my bed.
Yeah, pissing dreams are my sub-consciouses way of saying "HEY! Dumb ass! Y'gotta pee!"
 
Set up: I have a door to by back deck, if you don't close it just right, it will pop open. I also have some neighborhood cats that hang out on my back porch, and stare at my dog.

Dream: I walk into my kitchen and see an orange tabby that does not belong to me, then I notice that it is really hot inside the house. I look to the back door and it is wide open on a summer day. So I start to shoo the cat out of the house, then I notice another cat, and another cat.... so on. I pick up a grey tabby and just as I am about to give it the heave ho, I notice it is my cat Lili.

Then the large female cat comes struggling into the back door. She is white and covered in mangy sores. She is also dragging her belly because she is extremely pregnant and is about to pop. I panic when I realize that if she has the kittens in the house, they will become citizens and I wont be able to get rid of them. I felt like a terrible person, juggling all the cats out the back door and trying to slam it shut. But my dog kept trying to play with all the cats. And each time I try to close the door he would barrel in or out of the door keeping me from closing it.

I just wonder if my subconscious is really opposed to Syrian Refugees...
 
Had an interesting dream last night where I met three different girls.

The first worked at Subway. This was earliest in the dream, so I don't remember as much. It related with social media. I laughed heartily at something I saw on my phone and she took a picture of me, sharing it on Twitter. The photo went viral (in a positive way). I didn't realize this until after I left, but then went back and talked to her a little bit after she was done work. We had a good laugh over it.

(I also remember getting a message from someone I didn't recognize who wanted to kick my ass because I "looked gay" in that picture. He even told me to meet him at a nearby street corner at a specific time.)

The second girl I met through one of my best friends. She wanted to meet me but knew nothing about me. I don't remember what she looked like because it was dark for some reason. She rambled about plans for a first date, saying we should get drunk and go dancing. I said, "Whoa, I'm more a relaxed 'Starbucks with a book' guy." She thought relaxed meant "smoking a bowl." Then she brought up smoking and I said, "Um, hold on. I'm sorry, but those are some major dealbreakers for me. I'm not comfortable dating someone who smokes, does drugs, or drinks or parties a lot." Suddenly, she started crying loudly about being rejected, saying I'm judgemental. My friend and I shared an "Uh...." look. He was partly mad at me for upsetting his friend, but also apologetic because he knew I'm stubborn and picky and didn't realize his friend was like this.

The last girl tapped me on the shoulder while I walked down the street. She was kind of a punky girl, with a nose piercing, black hair, and a jean jacket. I remember her the most because right after she said, "Excuse me, I think we dated before...?" I woke up. Dammit, that's a great opening line.
 
Doesn't sound like it to me...
Syrians are literally Caucasians, far more so than most people we consider as such - "Caucasian" is a bad name to use for "white". They're also fairly light skinned, in general. They're not Arabs, ethnically.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Every so often, I dream that I just happen to walk into a place where I used to work a long time ago, like Best Buy (where I worked in high school) or Oracle (where I worked in Colorado Springs), and somebody yells at me "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? We've been waiting for you for SO long! Here's what we need you to do today..." and then I'm stuck there working for the rest of the dream, or until I remember "Hey wait, I quit/got let go from this job years ago," but that almost never happens.
 
Every so often, I dream that I just happen to walk into a place where I used to work a long time ago, like Best Buy (where I worked in high school) or Oracle (where I worked in Colorado Springs), and somebody yells at me "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? We've been waiting for you for SO long! Here's what we need you to do today..." and then I'm stuck there working for the rest of the dream, or until I remember "Hey wait, I quit/got let go from this job years ago," but that almost never happens.
I constantly have those same dreams, except I also always forget I'm supposed to be working but no one cares and my job is still there the next time I remember it exists.
 
Had two memorable dreams last night, one where I meet a fan at a con who begs me to give him a rare comic for his collection...only for him to sell it to a booth right next to me for 25 bucks, and then a book-shelf right above my bed collapsed on me, where I actually felt physical pain. Also most of the books were what I felt were continuations of Discworld. I continue to have comic book dreams, most likely due to my incessant need for completion as a collector.
 

fade

Staff member
Another zombie dream. I was part of a nomadic group some years after the outbreak (no doubt inspired by playing Last of Us recently, which is set 20 years after the outbreak). We would form communities in old towns that were free or mostly free of the zombies. For some reason (also from the game), we were at odds with the remnant of the government, who were well-equipped. In any case, we would stay in a town until the inevitable overrun by zombies, which would be announced by unearthly screaming from the horde. Then we'd bug out and move on to another. The zombies themselves were interesting. They had a hive-like mind, and were difficult to kill. One alone was no threat. In fact, it would usually not even notice you. However, as more grouped, one would become a semi-intelligent leader. Inevitably, these groups formed and organized to overrun our towns.

After we were overrun, we found a hospital that had found a cure, but it was tightly held by the government. The doctors being doctors were keen on administering the cure to as many as possible (it couldn't help those who already turned, but it could stop an active bite), but the government wanted it under their control. The doctors gave us some, but the gov't, having working radios still, got wind and showed up. That's where I woke up unfortunately. Trying to escape between floors.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Last night I dreamed I went to Best Buy to buy a video game (talk about retro, right?), but when I got to the front to pay, I reached down into my shopping bag, and my game had turned into a meatball sub. I look up from it, confused, to find Jon "Jontron" Jafari is working the register, and he's in full swing of his schtick, saying "lookadisguy over here, buyin' a meatball sammitch at Best Buy. DENATTADEN."

I don't remember much else except that the manager was a real tool.

I'm glad I had a dream about best buy that didn't have me working there, again... I worked there in high school, and every so often I still have a dream where I go into a Best Buy and get chewed out for being 20 years late for my shift, and then they make me work the floor.
 
I dreamed that I was drafted into the army. I was doing OK as a nearly 50 fat boy. Then as boot camp was winding down one of the young guys brought a couple of boxes to me. One was a nice set of Army Boots, the other was a box of teaching supplies. I was to teach geography again to these boys that were about to get sent off to war.

Teaching again scared me worse than facing combat.
 
I'm glad I had a dream about best buy that didn't have me working there, again... I worked there in high school, and every so often I still have a dream where I go into a Best Buy and get chewed out for being 20 years late for my shift, and then they make me work the floor.
I get that reoccurring nightmare too, finding myself working at my first high school job again and I'm in trouble because I've been missing shifts due to not realizing I worked there again.
 

fade

Staff member
I had this weird dream about rape zombies. They all wore victorian era suits, and were fully sentient/sapient. They had red irises, and spouted cheesy come-ons, and had a habit of pelvic thrusting while they walked. If they caught you and did the deed, you'd become one, too. I saw it happen. His eyes turned red, and he grew out a skeezy moustache, and started spouting pickup lines.
 
I had this weird dream about rape zombies. They all wore victorian era suits, and were fully sentient/sapient. They had red irises, and spouted cheesy come-ons, and had a habit of pelvic thrusting while they walked. If they caught you and did the deed, you'd become one, too. I saw it happen. His eyes turned red, and he grew out a skeezy moustache, and started spouting pickup lines.
Are you sure you weren't just remembering last Saturday night at the club?
 
I had this weird dream about rape zombies. They all wore victorian era suits, and were fully sentient/sapient. They had red irises, and spouted cheesy come-ons, and had a habit of pelvic thrusting while they walked. If they caught you and did the deed, you'd become one, too. I saw it happen. His eyes turned red, and he grew out a skeezy moustache, and started spouting pickup lines.
Sounds like Nick's Prom Night.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Last night I dreamed I took part in a collaborative Dragonball Z fanfic writing session on imgur that got so popular it crashed their servers.

Putting aside for the moment the illogical nature of using an image hosting site for a textual endeavor, upon waking it occurred to me that crashing imgur's servers is not a particularly herculean feat.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Last night I dreamed I had gotten drunk at a party and passed out on the couch, and then a woman also at the party had her way with me while I was unconscious (but because it was a dream, while I was "unconscious" I could still see what was going on, as if in the third person, but I couldn't do anything about it).

However, as she neared the end of the act, she stopped, complaining of pain, then went around to the other people at the party (who apparently had been oblivious of the goings-on despite it being in plain sight) complaining that the large size of my tallywhacker had hurt her.

Once I "regained consciousness," I went and played Lucioball, but instead of everybody being Lucio, it was a mixture of all Overwatch and TF2 characters on both sides.


So, yeah. Interpretations welcome.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Alright, so, last night I dreamed I came to this forum, and made a post talking about how when I was in the first grade I jumped off the roof of a garage, through the garage's attached basketball hoop, and landed in the driveway without hurting myself, all to impress a girl.

Of course, now that I am awake, I definitely know I did no such thing, but I "remembered" it clearly during the dream. Thing is, the "garage" in my dream was actually modeled after the garage on my own father's house in Colorado (right down to the basketball hoop), which he did not buy until I was almost out of Jr. High, and the girl I was impressing was a girl who was nothing more than a classmate and passing acquaintance... in the second grade... when I lived in Maryland.

At any rate, the dream did not stop there. After I made that post, I apparently decided to go revisit that garage out of nostalgia, and when I arrived I saw a policeman chasing someone around on top of the garage, shouting something about the man having a bike with an "illegal kickstand." I looked lower, and saw a bicycle at the corner of the garage, and its kickstand was mounted to the side of the rear tire - which is obviously a bad idea for a number of reasons, but not illegal per se.

Right behind that, was another bicycle I knew to belong to the policeman.

So I stole it.

The policeman quickly abandoned his pursuit of the guy on the roof to chase me, but as I had his bicycle, he stood no hope of catching me.

Then I woke up.

So... howbowdah.
 
Alright, so, last night I dreamed I came to this forum, and made a post talking about how when I was in the first grade I jumped off the roof of a garage, through the garage's attached basketball hoop, and landed in the driveway without hurting myself, all to impress a girl.

Of course, now that I am awake, I definitely know I did no such thing, but I "remembered" it clearly during the dream. Thing is, the "garage" in my dream was actually modeled after the garage on my own father's house in Colorado (right down to the basketball hoop), which he did not buy until I was almost out of Jr. High, and the girl I was impressing was a girl who was nothing more than a classmate and passing acquaintance... in the second grade... when I lived in Maryland.

At any rate, the dream did not stop there. After I made that post, I apparently decided to go revisit that garage out of nostalgia, and when I arrived I saw a policeman chasing someone around on top of the garage, shouting something about the man having a bike with an "illegal kickstand." I looked lower, and saw a bicycle at the corner of the garage, and its kickstand was mounted to the side of the rear tire - which is obviously a bad idea for a number of reasons, but not illegal per se.

Right behind that, was another bicycle I knew to belong to the policeman.

So I stole it.

The policeman quickly abandoned his pursuit of the guy on the roof to chase me, but as I had his bicycle, he stood no hope of catching me.

Then I woke up.

So... howbowdah.
I think you need to either cut down on the spicy wings before bed or start a collection of short stories. You have the perfect title already.
 
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