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The Dream Thread

Apr 23, 2012#1

fade

It's been said that some of the most boring things you can talk about are your dreams. If you concur, there's the door. I really like hearing about others' dreams, so go for it here.

Here's one of mine to start. I have a lot of zombie dreams. I remember one which was clearly patterned after the new Dawn of the Dead. I was stuck in a Best Buy with some others at the beginning of the zombie outbreak. I believe I'd made it there somehow. I have vague recollections of the beginning of the dream, and hiding under floorboards, etc. Anyway, the BB was secure, but a horde of zombies knew we were in there. We had to get out before they got in. I had discovered that you could rig up an LCD screen to emit a frequency of light that would destroy a zombie. So we spent the night modding a bunch of digital cameras (to use as grenades), TVs and monitors. It so happened that there was a vehicle of some sort in the BB as well. We rigged up a bunch of the tvs and monitors all over the vehicle, and threw a generator in the back. The whole thing was controlled by a laptop (mac of course) that could flash each monitor individually, or in a panic, all at once.

Anyway, we busted out... there's dim spots to the dream ... somehow the zombie war ended, and we one. But as we celebrated, the inevitable horror movie gotcha happened. There were stragglers, and one wandered out into the ocean. It was attacked by a shark, who became infected. The carrier shark swam north, and froze. The dream ended cinematically, with a boat carrying the frozen shark back toward a futuristic city, as the shark began to thaw...

Apr 23, 2012#2

bhamv3

I dreamt I was making out with a really hot girl I met last year, but who moved back to her native country this January. It was an amazingly realistic dream.

Also, I hope my girlfriend isn't secretly a HFer, because otherwise I'm gonna be in trouble.

Apr 23, 2012#3

Cajungal

I recently had a dream that I opened a gateway to a zombie apocalypse alternate universe. One of the zombie people got Danny de Vito.

It was sad.

Apr 23, 2012#4

fade

So it was like a bite-sized snack, then?

Apr 23, 2012#5

Cajungal

Heeheeheeee

Apr 23, 2012#6

makare

This week I dreamed about a purple cat with black stripes that had three green eyes. In another dream I married this alien guy who had spider fangs for legs. In that same dream I was sewing something with a little kitty in my lap and I accidentally stuck the needling into the kitty's head. I freaked the fuck out but besides crying some blood tears the kitty seemed fine.

Apr 23, 2012#7

figmentPez

I haven't been remembering a lot of my dreams lately, mostly just waking up with a sense that horrible things happened in my sleep.

One night recently, though, I did have three dreams I remembered. First one was good, second one was mixed, and the third was very unpleasant.

1. I was either in the future or found a book from the future. Either way it was a coffee table art/fashion book. Big heavy thing full of pictures. The dust cover was in tatters, but I could make out that it was from 2022. The fashion included everything from high fashion to cosplay, and everything blurred inbetween. I found a lot of pictures from one of my favorite cosplayers CatalystSirene. There were pics of her in cosplay, but also pics of clothes designed by her. I flipped to the index to see if I could find any other cosplayers I know, but I can't read in dreams.

2. There was a lot to this dream I couldn't remember. I only remember the middle of the dream. A young girl had developed a crush on me, and told me so. I said that I was probably too old for her, but she replied that she was 19, older than she looked. When I told her that I was 32 she realized I was right and backed off. It was flattering to have a pretty girl attracted to me, but I wasn't attracted to her.

3. This was the nightmare: I was wearing pants in a sauna. (Hey North_Ranger you ever have that nightmare?)
Okay, so there was more to the dream than that. I was at a hotel on some sort of trip. I don't know why but I walked into the sauna fully clothed, and there was a group of college students in there sitting around in towels and bathing suits. I took off my shirt, and they proceeded to mock me for being fat. It felt a lot worse than it actually was.

Apr 24, 2012#8

@Li3n

I haven't had a good action packed dream in years, at least not one i can remember... SAD FACE!

Best one i remember was me helping Sailor Moon and then there where bouncy balls everywhere, mostly blue... guess who was my fav sailor senshi...

Apr 24, 2012#9

makare

bouncing blue balls? paging dr Freud

Apr 24, 2012#10

@Li3n

And that's more shameful then it being from my attraction to a cartoon character how?

Apr 24, 2012#11

Null

I have a recurring dream where I'm trapped in a speeding car with the accelerator stuck wide open and no brakes, and all I can do is try and swerve around traffic until I hit something at high speed, and everything goes black, then it starts again. And there's nothing I can do.

Apr 24, 2012#12

FnordBear

I rarely remember my dreams. When I do they tend to be a disjointed mess of images and impressions. I have been told by my fiance as well as exbed partners that I have screamed in my sleep as well as moan and groan (not in the happy dream way). Basically I have had night terrors since I was a child and not remembering my dreams is how my psychology copes with thirty-three years of nightly terror.

That said I do remember some things, especially from my childhood before I started blacking them out.

1) A reoccurring dream. To understand this I have to explain my childhood a bit. My mother was employed in the family business of running an antique store. This store had the parking lot border a railroad track. A large amount of my young years were spent sitting on the loading dock door and watching trains go by. I liked them as much as any little boy but the horns they blew when they went by hurt my ears. Consequently I would have many dreams about trains jumping their tracks and driving through streets (much like the scene in Inception) blowing banshee-like horns in an effort to eat me. Once I was finally cornered the trains would some how turn in to giant metal snakes and I would then awaken terrified.

2) Another reoccurring dream from childhood that has followed me to adulthood. I am in the passenger seat of a car. It is driving fast and recklessly, but there is no driver. I somehow work my way in to the driver seat but no matter how I turn the wheel the car goes as it pleases. Then one by one the car begins to run down various people I know exploding them exploitation anime style all over the windshield.

3) The only other vivid and repeated dream I have had is one from my teenage years. I wont go in to gory details, I will leave it at I was watching detached as I did unspeakable things to women. I was outside looking in so to speak. I was horrified by what I saw but had no control over the actions of the "me" I witnessed.

Ok, Bear sharing time is over...sorry this one isn't my usual brand of inane insanity...it's just dirty real insanity.

Apr 24, 2012#13

fade

Yes, yes. Do go on, Mister Bear.

Apr 24, 2012#14

SeraRelm

Had a dream tiny little worms were everywhere like an ant infestation, but these ones would burrow most of the way into your skin then gorge on blood until they swelled way too big to pull out of the skin. I can't even call it a nightmare though since I don't have a fear of that at all. If anything I found them interesting, but annoying.

Hospitals mess with your head.

Apr 24, 2012#15

BananaHands

I had this dream I was in this gigantic mall that was more or less a maze. Kept trying to find my way out and every time I turned a corner there was a guy waiting with chocolate eclair samples. They were delicious, but I just wanted to find this girl who I've never seen in real life.

Apr 25, 2012#16

makare

I dreamed I completely forgot how to do my call center job. That is completely ridiculous, of course, because it is a job a trained monkey could do. It was a real nightmare but had no teeth.

Apr 25, 2012#17

Gusto

makare said:
I dreamed I completely forgot how to do my call center job. That is completely ridiculous, of course, because it is a job a trained monkey could do. It was a real nightmare but had no teeth.

I have a completely wide-awake mini panic attack right before all of my call centre shifts, like I'm going to completely forget how to talk on the phone. I totally get it.

Apr 25, 2012#18

makare

Did we both just happen to overuse the word completely or is that a side effect of call center nightmares?

Apr 25, 2012#19

Gusto

Oh man it probably is!

Apr 25, 2012#20

makare

what kind of cs do you do?

Apr 25, 2012#21

Gusto

General support for Bell satellite TV. Billing, technical, programming, etc.

Apr 25, 2012#22

fade

Please be patient. I will reply to this thread in the order in which it was received. Your post is important to us.

Apr 25, 2012#23

makare

do you have to tell the customer you appreciate them? we have to do that. It is a lie. The customer is a moron. I hate morons.

Apr 25, 2012#24

SeraRelm

I could barely sleep last night and I think it's from the oxycodone. Every time I'd start to drift off, I'd get this seizing fright in me. It felt like getting anxiety attacks, and the half remembered parts from just as I was drifting off were completely unnerving.

Apr 28, 2012#25

Cajungal

I had a dream that Jake told me he thought he might be an exhibitionist. So, like a good girlfriend, I found a support group that helps ease you into that lifestyle. That is the second-largest amount of johnsons I've ever seen in a dream. :confused:

It was like we were in a therapy room with a group, and then it became this holodeck situation where it turned into a forest right next to a highway. It's fun to wake up giggling.

Apr 28, 2012#26

SeraRelm

Cajungal said:
I had a dream that Jake told me he thought he might be an exhibitionist. So, like a good girlfriend, I found a support group that helps ease you into that lifestyle. That is the second-largest amount of johnsons I've ever seen in a dream. It was like we were in a therapy room with a group, and then it became this holodeck situation where it turned into a forest right next to a highway. It's fun to wake up giggling.

Apr 28, 2012#27

ElJuski

I dreamed I saw Avengers, and it was frustrating, because it was about some sort of weird "dream world", and in this "dream world" Scarlett Johanson was some sort of political figure, and then a dream figure came and shot people, and I swear to God, I sat in my dream (that I knew I was controlling) and whined and said, "WHEN THE FUCK IS IRON MAN GONNA BEAT UP CAPTAIN AMERICA".

Here's the kicker. Again, had half-way understood I was controlling the situation, so when Iron Man FINALLY came, I started to become Iron Man in the dream, but my dumbass dream self said, "No I am watching this this is a movie I cannot be Iron Man".

And then I woke up.

Apr 28, 2012#28

Null

Last night I dreamed that every single one of my friends and family told me that I was worthless and that they never wanted to see me again. One by one, walking out of my life, for good.

My subconscious hates me.

Apr 28, 2012#29

Bowielee

I had a dream last night that I met Oancitizen from TGWTG. It was weird. I'd won some sort of contest to meet someone from the site and he took me to this hotel where there were all these people dressed in top hats. That's about it.

I already shared my worst dream in the worst fears thread, so I'm not going to go over it again.

Apr 28, 2012#30

Hailey Knight

fade said:
It's been said that some of the most boring things you can talk about are your dreams. If you concur, there's the door. I really like hearing about others' dreams, so go for it here.

Here's one of mine to start. I have a lot of zombie dreams. I remember one which was clearly patterned after the new Dawn of the Dead. I was stuck in a Best Buy with some others at the beginning of the zombie outbreak. I believe I'd made it there somehow. I have vague recollections of the beginning of the dream, and hiding under floorboards, etc. Anyway, the BB was secure, but a horde of zombies knew we were in there. We had to get out before they got in. I had discovered that you could rig up an LCD screen to emit a frequency of light that would destroy a zombie. So we spent the night modding a bunch of digital cameras (to use as grenades), TVs and monitors. It so happened that there was a vehicle of some sort in the BB as well. We rigged up a bunch of the tvs and monitors all over the vehicle, and threw a generator in the back. The whole thing was controlled by a laptop (mac of course) that could flash each monitor individually, or in a panic, all at once.

Anyway, we busted out... there's dim spots to the dream ... somehow the zombie war ended, and we one. But as we celebrated, the inevitable horror movie gotcha happened. There were stragglers, and one wandered out into the ocean. It was attacked by a shark, who became infected. The carrier shark swam north, and froze. The dream ended cinematically, with a boat carrying the frozen shark back toward a futuristic city, as the shark began to thaw...

I once thought there was a zombie outbreak happening outside Best Buy. Then it turned out there was just a Wal-Mart next door.

Apr 28, 2012#31

SeraRelm

fade said:
as the shark began to thaw...

His name...

... is "Skippy."

Apr 28, 2012#32

Bowielee

I kind of want that resined and put in my living room.

Apr 28, 2012#33

SeraRelm

He's a bit resigned now, being in the lake near the ra- OH YOU SAID RESINED...
:awesome:

Apr 28, 2012#34

Bowielee

He's just so adorably predatory.

Apr 28, 2012#35

General Specific

makare said:
I dreamed I completely forgot how to do my call center job. That is completely ridiculous, of course, because it is a job a trained monkey could do. It was a real nightmare but had no teeth.

I have had nightmares that I was back at my old call center job. Not even anything out of the ordinary, just that I was back at my desk, talking on the phone all day. I woke up screaming.*

*That's a lie, I didn't really wake up screaming, but I feel like I should have.

Apr 28, 2012#36

Gusto

I used to have nightmares about failing school until I got fired from a job. Now I have nightmares about that job.

Apr 28, 2012#37

Bowielee

I used to have a recurring dream when I was younger about the undead attacking my town. It was weird, but every night I'd have it, the dream would be exactly the same every time, but get a litter farther in each dream. At some point in the dream, I pulled a Shaun of the Dead and realized that if I looked and acted like one of them, they wouldn't bother me. So, I found some theater makeup and made myself up like a zombie and escaped. Never had the dream since.

Also, has anyone else had the dream where you keep waking up, but you're still in the dream?

Now that will mess with your sense of reality.

Apr 28, 2012#38

Frank

Gusto said:
I used to have nightmares about failing school until I got fired from a job. Now I have nightmares about that job.

I sometimes have nightmares about fucking something up terribly at work. Those are always the ones that scare me awake.

Apr 28, 2012#39

Gusto

Frank said:
I sometimes have nightmares about fucking something up terribly at work. Those are always the ones that scare me awake.

Well I'm not a cop. No one could DIE as a result of my bad consultation. The worst they could do is lose millions of dollars.

Apr 28, 2012#40

Bowielee

Gusto said:
Well I'm not a cop. No one could DIE as a result of my bad consultation. The worst they could do is lose millions of dollars.

and then kill themselves.

Just trying to keep it in perspective

Apr 28, 2012#41

Frank

Gusto said:
Well I'm not a cop. No one could DIE as a result of my bad consultation. The worst they could do is lose millions of dollars.

Lives, millions of dollars, potato, potahto.

Apr 28, 2012#42

Gusto

Apr 30, 2012#43

bhamv3

Last night I dreamt I was back in the army.

It's been a long time since I've had that "Oh thank God it's just a dream" feelings.

Apr 30, 2012#44

Bowielee

I actually had a dream about Dave last night. We were skyping about D&D campaigns. It was weird.

Apr 30, 2012#45

SeraRelm

And then you made out?

Apr 30, 2012#46

Bowielee

Yeah, we fondled each other's moobs.

But seriously, I was then tackled by a cyclops. Interpret that how you will.

It looked just like this:

Apr 30, 2012#47

Docseverin

I infrequently have dreams that I forget to pull my parachute, or I pull it too late and I hit the ground. I never wake up frightened or with the feeling of falling, I just wake up, like I would from any other dream.

Apr 30, 2012#48

GasBandit

Dreams I frequently have:

1) Being back in high school but at my current age, because I somehow didn't complete ONE class that was required to get my diploma, and it's final is today and I haven't attended all year.
2) Being back at the part time job I held in high school at Best Buy, where they promptly chew me out for absenteeism because I haven't been to work in years and years.
3) Oh god there are pennies between my teeth all my teeth have pennies between them oh god don't pull them out everything will just come out.
4) I am playing the video game I am currently playing most, and everything is progressing as normal, ad infinitum. Games that have triggered these dreams - Everquest, DAOC, WoW, Warhammer Online, TF2, Supreme Commander, Skyrim, Mass Effect, Orcs Must Die.
5) Same as number 4 but everything is going to hell in a handbasket and I can't make any progress.
6) I have a loose tooth. I try to hold it in.

I no longer have this one, but 10 or 15 years ago, I used to frequently dream of walking to the supermarket, buying mundane items like deodorant or bread, and walking home. I would wake up from that dream feeling cheated because it was so drab and pedestrian.

Apr 30, 2012#49

Frank

Video game dreams always make me not want to play that particular game for a while because, for me, they're always the most monotonous parts of the game that I dream about.

Apr 30, 2012#50

fade

GasBandit said:
Dreams I frequently have:

1) Being back in high school but at my current age, because I somehow didn't complete ONE class that was required to get my diploma, and it's final is today and I haven't attended all year.
2) Being back at the part time job I held in high school at Best Buy, where they promptly chew me out for absenteeism because I haven't been to work in years and years.
3) Oh god there are pennies between my teeth all my teeth have pennies between them oh god don't pull them out everything will just come out.
4) I am playing the video game I am currently playing most, and everything is progressing as normal, ad infinitum. Games that have triggered these dreams - Everquest, DAOC, WoW, Warhammer Online, TF2, Supreme Commander, Skyrim, Mass Effect, Orcs Must Die.
5) Same as number 4 but everything is going to hell in a handbasket and I can't make any progress.
6) I have a loose tooth. I try to hold it in.

I no longer have this one, but 10 or 15 years ago, I used to frequently dream of walking to the supermarket, buying mundane items like deodorant or bread, and walking home. I would wake up from that dream feeling cheated because it was so drab and pedestrian.

Why does everyone have dream #1 there? http://xkcd.com/557/

Apr 30, 2012#51

Cajungal

Don't remember seeing anything... Just remember hearing a lot of Cee-Lo Green.

Apr 30, 2012#52

Chad Sexington

GasBandit said:
Dreams I frequently have:

3) Oh god there are pennies between my teeth all my teeth have pennies between them oh god don't pull them out everything will just come out.

6) I have a loose tooth. I try to hold it in.

Dreams about teeth coming out are supposedly indicative of secrets. What aren't you telling us? What aren't you telling... yourself?

Apr 30, 2012#53

figmentPez

Cajungal said:
Don't remember seeing anything... Just remember hearing a lot of Cee-Lo Green.

♫ I see you dreaming in bed, alarm starts to buzz, and I'm like "sleep through". ♫

Apr 30, 2012#54

Cajungal

Nice.

Apr 30, 2012#55

SeraRelm

Bowielee said:
Yeah, we fondled each other's moobs.

But seriously, I was then tackled by a cyclops. Interpret that how you will.

It looked just like this:

Was it.. Dave's cyclops?

May 1, 2012#56

GasBandit

Chad Sexington said:
Dreams about teeth coming out are supposedly indicative of secrets. What aren't you telling us? What aren't you telling... yourself?

Oh wouldn't *I* like to know.

May 1, 2012#57

sixpackshaker

A strange thing happened in a dream the other night. I was riding in the passenger seat of a pick up, when a car ran the red light, T-Boned the door I was sitting at... and killed me. Then I woke up in a different part of the dream.

That was the first time that I was killed or severely maimed in a dream and did not fully wake up.

May 7, 2012#58

Cajungal

I have a lot of dreams about beaches that exist where they should not. For example, I walked into a post office and opened a back door, and there was this huge beach. All these cute manatees were swimming around, and Brock Samson was there tearing their heads off and selling their meat to people. I was so crushed, because I love Brock Samson. But then I thwarted his evil efforts by convincing the manatees to relocate (they spoke English), and then he chased me up this loooong flight of stairs. He caught me of course, because he's Brock Samson, and then he started strangling me. All I could think was, "I hope I'm on the show, because I bet this looks cool." Then I thought, "I wonder if the Monarch has some machine that turned him evil." Then I woke up.

May 8, 2012#59

@Li3n

Cajungal said:
Then I thought, "I wonder if the Monarch has some machine that turned him evil." Then I woke up.

She knows...

May 8, 2012#60

Null

Mine was something about turning our garage into a "bat farm". No idea what the hell that's about.

May 8, 2012#61

SeraRelm

Are you guano do it though? :aaah:

May 8, 2012#62

Soliloquy

I used to have frequent dreams that I could fly -- but not regular flying. I had to swim the breaststroke through the air with just the right timing and momentum, otherwise I'd lose altitude. These dreams started a good 12 or 13 years ago, when I first started swimming for a local club team.

The dreams happened so often that the flying ability itself ceased to be the focus of the dream. Sometimes I was spying on people via my flying ability, or making my way through a secret facility, or trying to cross a chasm. Because of the effort and skill involved in my in-dream flying, there was always the constant fear that I wouldn't be able to stay in the air -- the flight was constantly filled with the danger of my losing my rhythm or running out of energy, then plummeting to the ground below. I sometimes failed at my goals, though I never had any particularly brutal crashes.

The dreams became so frequent that in the back of my mind I began to wonder if I really could fly in the waking world, and I was just too afraid to try. I knew well enough to not actually try, but the thought was still there.

When I was unemployed right out of college, my flight dreams took an interesting twist: I knew I could fly, and consistently was able to fly on my own -- but I could never prove to anyone else that I could fly. Whenever I managed to get up into the air, no matter where I was, there was never anyone around.

When I started dating the woman I mentioned in the help thread, I had a dream that I don't think I'll ever forget. I was flying with no one around to see, as usual, when I spotted someone below. A witness! I flew over the person so they could see, but ended up losing my rhythm and falling.

I landed on the person, and found out that I had severely hurt her -- and that she was the woman I was dating.

I woke up scared, upset and in tears. I haven't dreamed of flying since.

May 8, 2012#63

fade

I've had the same sort of dreams consistently. Flying, but only through manual effort, to the point where it was almost believable.

I grew up in a really rural area (couldn't see neighbors), and we had this green sodium light just next to our house. There was a long driveway (football field at least) that sloped to our house. I used to dream that I would run in the night toward the house, and then jump and fly over the roof. I remember fascinated by the dream because in it I was keenly aware of what our house looked like from about 30 feet above. Behind our house, there was a huge stretch of woods. Every time I crossed the roof crest, there was something happening in the woods. Usually lots of activity. I remember once, the woods were on fire, and the devil, who I only saw in silhouette, walked in front of the fire. People ran around in front of him. A lot of them were in military uniforms, firing guns, and talking on radios.

Later, I read about astral walking, and it freaked me out. The books always talked about knowing what things looked like from perspectives you had never seen, and a moment of "crossing over" into the spiritual world.

May 9, 2012#64

@Li3n

So flying is like running for everyone... doesn't work on it's own (in dreams)...

But i for one do get another kind of flying in dreams, where it's just like falling, except forward instead of down... and with Bug Bunny style mid-air breaking slowdowns...

May 16, 2012#65

@Li3n

So, last night i dreamt that those creepy wizard guys from Qarth where roasting Ned Stark alive in some sort of glass and wood display case... wonder what that's about... i mean after all human flesh isn't that good anyway and i wasn't that hungry...

May 16, 2012#66

SeraRelm

I dreamt I was invited to take a shower with a Halforumite. I accepted.

May 17, 2012#67

redthirtyone

It has been 7 years since I managed a restaurant, at least 10 since I waited tables. I STILL get the "waiting tables in the weeds" dream.

May 17, 2012#68

North_Ranger

Threesome with Liara T'Soni and a cute white-haired chick with freckles.

I have no idea where that came from.

May 20, 2012#69

HCGLNS

So last night I dreamt that all the super heroes in the Marvel Universe had to swim across Lake Mazinaw to reach Nazi occupied China and blow up the new Nazi Western Front HQ that was a brand new building situated on prime railway territory.

When they get there they find that their mission is going incredibly easy, they dispose of the guards, plant explosives and with the help of Lieutenant Cosmo Kramer manage to disrupt the entire Western Front communications relay system.

But wait! The entire complex is in reality the Nazis new secret weapon! The building is able to make the heroes believe everything they want. They have not in reality accomplished anything, and soon the exposure to the building itself will kill them all! They can only escape if they manage to convince themselves and the building to create a logical paradox that the entire team can't believe.

and then I woke up. Kinda bummed I didn't get to see how that one ended.

May 20, 2012#70

SeraRelm

It's Marvel. Wolverine beat everything then picked up some more underage girls to moon over him.

May 20, 2012#71

HCGLNS

Not likely, I don't accept anything Wolverine post his original mini-series as cannon. I could see Colossus saving the day though, love me some Russian mutants!

May 20, 2012#72

makare

I dreamed another one of those dreams where I had to identify my pets among a bunch of other like colored pets and it was really difficult and stressful.

I am pretty sure in real life I could pick my pets out of any line up. But my subconscious seems to use that scenario to show extreme anxiety.

May 20, 2012#73

fade

You're saying all black cats look alike to you?

May 20, 2012#74

SeraRelm

No, any of the non-white ones look the same.

May 20, 2012#75

makare

Lol oddly enough it was my cat Gwennie, the white one, that I had the hardest time picking.

May 27, 2012#76

SeraRelm

Was about to drift off when I started half dreaming about my bedroom from when I was a child, with it's austere white walls, the are wooden floor with too much polish on it and the small, metal frame bed. Not a good memory either. I kind of jolted awake feeling anxiety.

Anyone else ever get that kind of jolt to wakefulness?

May 27, 2012#77

Shegokigo

SeraRelm said:
Anyone else ever get that kind of jolt to wakefulness?

Alot.

May 27, 2012#78

Shegokigo

If I could succesfully have lucid controlled dreams I'd be a much happier person.

The number of people I would kill on a nightly basis, the ways I could do it, the sheer joy I would have in the act..... *sigh*

Lucid dreaming has appealed to me for YEARS for that solitary reason. Finally being able to do what I daydream every waking hour of.

May 27, 2012#79

Hailey Knight

My wife lucid dreams every night. When I learned this, I realized why she sleeps 12+ hours any day she doesn't have to get up early.

May 27, 2012#80

Frank

I just dreamed I was steaming and eating babies with my pasta over and over and over again.

May 31, 2012#81

bhamv3

I had a lucid dream last night where I was on a giant chessboard, with large complex lattice of bars and struts built above it, and I could command a bunch of acrobats to do tricks on it. I think I came up with a new Olympic gymnastics routine in my sleep.

Jun 12, 2012#82

drifter

I had a short but memorable dream last night. I noticed my left earlobe was bleeding, and upon closer inspection saw what appeared to be a large black bolus breaking through the skin. I popped it out, and it kind of unfolded to reveal itself as a teratoma with hyperdontia.

Jun 12, 2012#83

SeraRelm

your ears had teeth?

Jun 12, 2012#84

fade

Someone take drifter's medical dictionary away. There's WAY too much jargon in that paragraph.

I had a dream I was a zombie, but I realized we really were sentient, and the whole "kill all humanity" was just because the whole idea seemed like an incredibly funny practical joke once you became a zombie. In my mind, I was thinking, "Heh, watch this. Bob will get a real kick out of it if I eat his face."

I got shot in the head, but it didn't actually kill me, it just messed up my eyesight in one eye, and I thought, "Man, I better stop chasing Bob, if I want to be able to see."

So long story short, being a zombie is like really good weed, apparently.

Jun 12, 2012#85

GasBandit

SeraRelm said:
your ears had teeth?

His ear had a TUMOR that had teeth.

Jun 12, 2012#86

drifter

fade said:
Someone take drifter's medical dictionary away. There's WAY too much jargon in that paragraph.

I figure bolus is pretty common, and teratoma is unsual, but not unknown, especially on the interwebs. Hyperdontia I'll give you, although we had a lovely picture and discussion about it in the Not So Funny Picture thread.

Jun 12, 2012#87

SeraRelm

Though the discussion got a bit... long in the tooth.
:csi:

Jun 12, 2012#88

Cajungal

Hah! Teratoma always makes me think of _Lucy, Daughter of the Devil._

Jun 12, 2012#89

GasBandit

Cajungal said:
Hah! Teratoma always makes me think of _Lucy, Daughter of the Devil._

That show was way too hip for the room.

Jun 12, 2012#90

Cajungal

Eugene Mirman as a sadistic, temperamental nun? H. Jon Benjamin as the devil in a Cosby sweater?
I had to get in on that.

Jul 6, 2012#91

LittleSin

Because I hurt Fades feelings by neglecting his thread.

Let me tell you about the dream I had last night.

I was watching a movie. The movie was Toy Story 4. In this movie everything starts off happy, all the characters hanging out in Bonnies room doing there thing. Then is gets weird.

Bonnie is pushed into her room by her mothers who tells her to "Don't come out, no matter what!" She slams the door and locks it. here are screams and groaning. The little girl is crying as her mothers screams die down and the banging on the door begins. The door breaks down and in climb very pixarish zombies. This design choice some how makes them more terrifying.

The girl is backed into a corner, the zombies are advancing, arms out stretched...when Woody and Buzz decided they ain't going to take this shit and jump to her rescue. The other toy join in and they some how manage to take down these zombies. The girl is stunned and thrilled at the same time.

Around this time I looked over to Steve, confused and horrified. He's rolling his eyes. "Not another zombie movie. All of Disneys movies are like this since they reanimated Walt. Hollywood is shit."

I think there was more to this dream, like Bonnie making the toys her army and stuff...but i can't remember.

WTF , brain?

Also, I can probably fill up this thread with weird dreams.

Jul 6, 2012#92

Cajungal

That... is great.

Jul 6, 2012#93

LittleSin

Dream Steve made that for me. He sounded more like Charlie than my husband.

He kept heckling the god damn movie.

Jul 6, 2012#94

Cajungal

Did he keep telling you what Ebert said about it??

Jul 6, 2012#95

LittleSin

No...but he did tell me that hollywood couldn't write women and that Bonnie was being subjugated by the Zombies and the toys represented male empowerment.

I'm serious. This was my dream last night...toy story zombies and snob steve. I woke up feeling jittery and unrested.

Jul 6, 2012#96

BananaHands

I had a dream I kept running into stray cats and having to fight them.

wut.

Jul 6, 2012#97

LittleSin

BananaHands said:
I had a dream I kept running into stray cats and having to fight them.

wut.

Are you sure you weren't playing an old school adventure game?

Jul 6, 2012#98

BananaHands

It was so strange. At one point I went to go to the bathroom to take a break and it was full of stray cats that wanted to claw at me.

Jul 7, 2012#99

Dream Goddess

I often lucid dream that Maynard James Keenan is my dad and that I fly around Merkin Vineyards, dropping bombs on paparazzi and trespassers who get onto the property. I'm pretty sure Maynard would love to have me for a daughter. Aaaaand when I start having a nightmare, I just "change the channel", which lately defaults to being a mermaid in a huge glass hotel filled with water.

I am the goddess of my dreams.

Jul 7, 2012#100

Gusto

Dream Goddess said:
I am the goddess of my dreams.

Jul 7, 2012#101

Dream Goddess

Gusto said:

That's right. And now you know. :Leyla:

Jul 7, 2012#102

fade

Dream Goddess said:
I often lucid dream that Maynard James Keenan is my dad and that I fly around Merkin Vineyards, dropping bombs on paparazzi and trespassers who get onto the property. I'm pretty sure Maynard would love to have me for a daughter. Aaaaand when I start having a nightmare, I just "change the channel", which lately defaults to being a mermaid in a huge glass hotel filled with water.

I am the goddess of my dreams.

I know this is theoretically English, but I have no idea what any of it means.

Jul 7, 2012#103

LittleSin

fade said:
I know this is theoretically English, but I have no idea what any of it means.

Oh thank God. I thought I just wasn't awake enough to read it right.

Jul 7, 2012#104

Hailey Knight

LittleSin said:
Oh thank God. I thought I just wasn't awake enough to read it right.

Great, now I'm worrying what bizarre effect she's having on me because I understood all that.

Dream Goddess said:
I often lucid dream that Maynard James Keenan is my dad and that I fly around Merkin Vineyards, dropping bombs on paparazzi and trespassers who get onto the property. I'm pretty sure Maynard would love to have me for a daughter. Aaaaand when I start having a nightmare, I just "change the channel", which lately defaults to being a mermaid in a huge glass hotel filled with water.

I am the goddess of my dreams.

Lucid dream: ability to control one's dreams. She does this every night and it's no wonder she hates getting out of bed.
Maynard James Keenan: I'll use Wiki to help... "n American rock singer, songwriter, musician, record producer, winemaker, and actor", behind musical groups such as Tool, A Perfect Circle, and Puscifer.
Dad: male parent
Merkin Vineyards: a vineyard Maynard owns
bombs: Gifts that explode
love me for a daughter: the point where you know this is a dream

in case of nightmare, change channel: because she lucid dreams, if something bad starts happening that's out of her control, she switches the whole dream over to something she likes.
mermaid in a huge glass hotel filled with water: ...I don't have any fucking idea, but she's cute.
goddess of my dreams: Going back again to the lucid dreaming, she's entirely in control, like a goddess

As for my dream, last night I dreamed I was Commander Shepard, and we were on some planet where dinosaurs were rising from the ground, overtaking the cities, destroying all society and no one could stop it... like a zombie movie, but with dinosaurs. The horrible part was that my loyal friends and squadmates were left to die at one point or another, one by one, as Shepard went off to save her own ass. And in the end, she didn't even accomplish that, and died from her wounds after blowing up a huge fuel refinery to kill a bunch of the dinos. She just crumpled to the ground, bleeding out as fire raged behind her, knowing she back-stabbed everyone who loved her and all in vain.

Jul 7, 2012#105

LittleSin

That's why renegade is sometimes junky.

I dreamed I had no thumbs.

It was frustrating.

Jul 7, 2012#106

mikerc

I never remember my dreams. The most I get is an impression that it involved whatever video game I've been playing lately, or just that it was incredibly weird whatever it involved.

Trust me, waking up and thinking something like "Huh, that dream was weird. Wonder what actually happened in it? Bet it would be really interesting if I could remember it." and knowing that I'll never know what it involved can be incredibly frustrating.

Jul 7, 2012#107

checkeredhat

I actually remembered my dream last night. Or parts of it, anyway. I VERY rarely remember them, which is why I've yet to post here. Maybe like, 4-6 dreams a year I remember.

LAst night I dreamt I read that Kevin Smith was going to producing a series of documentaries on Junio Hockey in Canada eading up to the release of "Hit Somebody"

I also have recollections of a dream that involved getting back together with my ex (Only it wasn't my ex... it was a sort of amalgamation of several girls I know, two of whom are exes), and then basically selling her down the river to get away when a zombie "Howler" (I have no idea what this is, but that's what the people in my dream called it) came after us.

Jul 7, 2012#108

Bumble the Boy Wonder

So are any of these wet dreams or should I just not bother reading anything in this thread, come on guys show me the good stuff

Jul 7, 2012#109

makare

So far this week I dreamed I had sex with hugh laurie and with this vampire chick. Not the same dream thankfully.

I also dreamed that this megalomaniac businessman wanted to have all the power in the universe. To get it he had to fight this really old lady who was some kind of super ninja. To prepare he wanted to take this magic potion but since he was competing in front of this group of people he had to pretend that it was something else. So he turned the lights out in the arena and mixed it in the dark. Severus Snape was there and he tasted what he made and said it was a poison. The only cure for which was a rotten apple which someone got for Snape from a replicator like from DS9. Then Snape flew away. I don't know how the battle came out. I do know the poison smelled like lemons.

Jul 7, 2012#110

WasabiPoptart

Bumble the Boy Wonder said:
So are any of these wet dreams or should I just not bother reading anything in this thread, come on guys show me the good stuff

I rarely ever have sex dreams. At least I don't remember them. My dreams are usually freaky in a bad way.

Jul 7, 2012#111

Bumble the Boy Wonder

I cant remember the last time I had a sexy times dream

The last dream i can recall, wasnt a sexy dream at all. It was actually just some sort of craziness involving my family having just moved to a new house, because our old one had unfortunately been within the blast of a nuke.. so sad

...now if i can just get a dream where i can dive into a pile of sexy naked women...

Jul 7, 2012#112

makare

I have sex dreams all the time. They are usually weird and disturbing.

Jul 7, 2012#113

Bumble the Boy Wonder

....Disturbing? Go on...

Jul 8, 2012#114

fade

Last night I had a dream that was kind of a mix between The Matrix and Pleasantville.

I was in this 1950s era high school or college classroom. Everyone around me was in 1950s clothing, and there was a teacher droning on about algebra or something. The only stand-out people were a greaser and a girl with hair like the Brave girl. I had no idea who I was or how I got there, except that I was being Rehabilitated. For what and why I did not know.

But the Brave girl, whose name turned out to be Dorothy, did. Well, she didn't know everything. She knew we were rebels who broke free from the state control, which was this fugue called the Dreamlike State. We were being returned to the Dreamlike State. The Dreamlike State was this "place" for lack of a better word, that kind of responded to your whims. It didn't grant your desires, but the State was mercurial and changed constantly according to your thoughts. At first, you knew it wasn't real, but like a dream, you slowly forgot. I could already tell the rest of the 50s kids were fully drawn in from the looks they were giving me.

There were things about Dorothy that indicated that her Dreamlike State was something like Wizard of Oz (aside from her name). After she told me all of this, I could tell she was being drawn in. After class was dismissed, we walked down the hall. At the tee in the hall ahead, there was one of those signposts (silver post and frame, black sign with the pop-in letters). I said, "Look, that sign is for you." One of the names and arrows said "Timothy Gale". I said, "See, 'gale', as in 'tornado'.". I tried to stop her, but she began to run in the indicated direction, which lead out of the school building. Through the window, I saw her run parallel to my hallway, and disappear behind a building. Shortly, she screamed, and I saw her run back out again, yelling about a tornado. A machine sort of like the Matrix sentinels followed her with a swirling blue vortex in the front, and I knew she saw it as a tornado. It caught up to her, and for a brief moment, I saw it as a tornado, too. Both the machine and the girl disappeared, presumably into the Dreamlike State.

---

Later, I was in the Dreamlike State, but in the resistance movement. My partner was the greaser, whose name was Franky All (which I'm pretty sure my brain took from One Piece).

Jul 8, 2012#115

Terrik

I had a dream where I couldn't quite open my eyes. I was walkign around, but extremely tired, and try as I might, I couldn't fully open my eyes. Needless to say I woke up even more tired.

Jul 8, 2012#116

WasabiPoptart

Of course since I said I only remember horrible dreams I had one last night that was actually not bad and I remember part of it. I was getting a tattoo on my chest. I think Jamie from Mythbusters was the artist (though it only looked like him). It was a big ocean wave coming up from the middle of my chest and curled over my left breast. It had a plumeria at the crest of the wave because I said I wanted it to represent the time we spent in Hawaii. It also had a cartoon-ish crab with a sailor's hat riding the wave and another detail I can't quite remember. It was a rather large piece. The artist didn't have the color of ink he needed to use on part of it when it was mostly finished and had to order it for express delivery.

Jul 8, 2012#117

Bumble the Boy Wonder

I want to draw that...[DOUBLEPOST=1341780945][/DOUBLEPOST]Except, you know, without the boobies part

Jul 8, 2012#118

makare

Bumble the Boy Wonder said:
I want to draw that...[DOUBLEPOST=1341780945][/DOUBLEPOST]Except, you know, without the boobies part

but the boobies are my favorite part of the drawings.

Jul 8, 2012#119

Terrik

Weird dreams last night.

One part had me visit my University which was populated by old high school classmates. To top things off, I was wearing my rival school's T-shirt. Oddly enough, nobody recognized me, though I recognized them. The school band was practicing out in the field, and people were walking around from class to class. I eventually ran into my brother and a stranger who wanted to join the band but didn't know how. Across the street there were two Mcdonalds. On one McDonalds sign, there was a University of Florida (Gators--my school) banner on it. On the other was a Florida State University (Seminoles) banner on it. It seemed to cause my brother no end of disgust.

Another part involved my Chinese co-worker. We were continuously discussing a school meeting we had involving the upcoming renovation and the things we had to prepare for. The odd part of the dream is the way we sent messages to each other. We wrote using a sort of....water paper. It was a liquid. In the dream trying to use the roman alphabet caused the letters to dissolve and not appear in the water. However, if I wrote my message using Chinese characters, they would appear in the liquid and float. I believe I used my finger to write them.

The last part of my dream involved preparing to enter a big time night club for some reason--a meeting about the school renovation I believe. I was warned beforehand to get in I'd have to look like I had a lot of money to spend. Now I've been having a craving to play RTS games so in this part of the dream, down a dark alley away from this club's entrance, I had a base. It was red and equipped with missile launchers. Along this alley are doorways and porches. Each doorway had a man chained to a rail and they silently stared at me. My roommate shows up for some reason and heads down the alley past my base. A few s econds later, I hear screaming and running. He comes running back down the alley followed by a T-rex that could talk. He runs out to the street before being caught and dragged back by the T-rex. While he's being eaten alive, my base's missile launchers shoot at the T-rex and I can someh0w see the T-rex's "Health bar". After eating my roommate the T-rex says he isn't hungry anymore, but my base's defenses finally do their job and the T-rex falls over dead. With that mission accomplished, I finally head into the club escorted by none other than Lindsey Lohan. We order a cheap bottle of wine to drink and sat and waited for whatever meeting was supposed to take place. Then my alarm went off.

So yeah.

Jul 8, 2012#120

Bumble the Boy Wonder

makare said:
but the boobies are my favorite part of the drawings.

Boobies: The favorite part of all things

Jul 10, 2012#121

@Li3n

LittleSin said:
Around this time I looked over to Steve, confused and horrified. He's rolling his eyes. "Not another zombie movie. All of Disneys movies are like this since they reanimated Walt. Hollywood is shit."

That's not a dream... that's the head slowly thawing, they froze it so the virus would work slowly enough to grant it psychic powers instead of making it just another ant-zombie...

EDIT: Oh, and this morning around 5 am i dreamed i woke up and tried to shave only to realise i had white whiskers... and it being one of those waking dreams it actually felt pretty real, even had to double check the brain after waking up to make sure it wasn't.

Jul 19, 2012#122

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I was taking my bicycle out for a ride and Sarah Palin hit me with a car. Then she tried to intimidate me into giving her my bicycle, and I had to sic the dog on her to make her go away.

But the dream I had the night BEFORE last was way better. I dreamed that comedy became a weapon of mass destruction. That jokes told by stand-up comedians manifested themselves into living superbeings which then attacked your enemies. Unfortunately, our enemies learned this first, and America came under siege by a comedically generated assault force. Our only defense - sewing. At the same time, whatever image was sewn or embroidered would then step off the cloth and come to life - an army of cross-stitched mecha, men and monsters doing battle with the frickin' landlord who always has an excuse not to fix things and talks with that hilarious accent, the quirky corner drug dealer, and that funny neice who always says the cute, funny things.

Jul 19, 2012#123

sixpackshaker

GasBandit said:
...the quirky corner drug dealer...

I think the truth just came out.

Jul 24, 2012#124

North_Ranger

Last night I dreamt I was a runaway convict stowing away aboard the Titanic. I killed the cop who was after me on my way to the lifeboat, and then had to defend myself against people who wanted to throw me overboard.

At some point I made peace with the person who most wanted to throw me overboard - this proper American gentleman with a bowler hat and pince-nez glasses. But then the boat overturned and we ended up in icy water. The guy with the pince-nez glasses died of hypothermia, and once we were picked up I asked the people who had survived not to turn me in, and I'd take the identity of the guy who had died. I woke up when I was walking away in the American's clothes, and having given my clothes to a passing black guy.

I wonder if I should write this down and market it at Hollywood...

Aug 24, 2012#125

BananaHands

Had a relatively normal dream last night, until I got shot in the leg during it. Then I woke up with a terrible leg cramp. Oh, dreams. Y u so crazy?

Aug 24, 2012#126

Frank

I dreamed I was rich on a trip with my family on a massive yacht.

Lately my dreams have been about going on family trips and I have no idea why.

Aug 24, 2012#127

dill616

This week, I had a dream that Gen Spec and I were watching someone's daughter. She was about 4 or 5 and a real brat. Her defense against not getting her way was to open her mouth and emit this blood curdling scream. I reached my hand back and slapped her across the face*. It made a nice 'crack' sound and was a very good, clean smack. This silenced the little girl. Gen Spec then leaned down and said, "That's what you get."

*Neither Gen Spec nor I have ever laid hands upon a child and we have no intention of ever doing so in the future.

Aug 24, 2012#128

Officer_Charon

Dreamed last night that I was involved in a car crash with a tanker full of paint whilst driving with my parents and sister.

Woke up right as the crash happened and my alarm went off.

Aug 24, 2012#129

dill616

This will now haunt my dreams.

Aug 27, 2012#130

Cajungal

I dreamed I was fighting these weird goblins by a lake, and suddenly this huge horse came out of the water and scared them away. The horse disappeared under the water again, and then these little pig children led me to an underwater safe house where Batman was fighting a guy who was trying to unleash a turns-people-to-pigs virus on the world. My job was to feed oatmeal to the sick people.

I was once offered hallucinogens. I really don't want to see what else is nesting in my subconscious. I'm content with the amount of weirdness in my life.

Aug 27, 2012#131

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed somebody nailed two sturdy boards about 6 inches apart across a door jamb, and grabbed spider-man by his feet and dragged him through the gap, skinning and juicing him simultaneously and crunchily.

Aug 27, 2012#132

LittleSin

I dreamed that I was trying to get Jet into a private a school and I was being given a tour of the futuristic facilities. The power went out during the tour due to a sudden volcano in the sky (WTF?) and we had to wait to be evacuated.

The staff was starting to act weird, all nervous and shit..then there was this ROAR. Turns out they were also cloning dinosaurs in the school and the power being out took down the fences. Due to the raining lava outside we couldn't leave so Jet and I spent time using the staff as canon fodder while we tried to excape. I talking gecko led us to the underground cave where we met the lead Utahraptor who decided to let us stay as long we operated the doors for them.

So. Yeh.

Aug 27, 2012#133

Officer_Charon

I can't remember the lead-in to it, but I had just finished a race, and my wife had handed me a big ol' slab of deli-cut roast beef, you know the kind that's all cool and juicy, and I had rolled it up and was about to eat it, and the radio was playing this awesome song and I was feeling like a rockstar...

... and then my wife woke me up and told me if I was going to have time to go running, I needed to get up right then.

I nearly wept openly.

Aug 27, 2012#134

WasabiPoptart

As you might have read in another thread, we recently had the cable tv shut off and are only running internet in our house. We use Netflix, Hulu, etc. via our XBox when we want to watch tv.

My dream last night was that the XBox started acting up while I was playing Skyrim and then I got a RROD! NOOOOOO!

Aug 27, 2012#135

Wahad

My dreams, though often scoring high on the WTF spectrum, usually have a coherent storyline that I can follow. I blame this on having an eye for creative details and always wanting to get to the nitty-gritty of a fictional setting, although I really don't mind, as it gives me some very nice dreams that I can follow and remember easily - if they play nice and come to me right before I wake up, that is.

The first dream that I ever remembered the next morning (and all days afterwards) was when I was six years old. I was playing outside with some friends when suddenly this man with a classy top-hat and a large raincoat showed up and told us to go play elsewhere. So we did, but then he showed up later again and told us the same. When he told us for the third time, he said ''that's enough'' and let a dog out. It was a big, black labrador and it bit me in my stomach.

Imagine my surprise when, three years later, my uncle shows up at the doorstep to show us his new dog. A big, black labrador. Cue flashback and startled jump. Fortunately for me, Morris the dog wasn't a biter.

Another I had when I was twelve years old, was something of a prophetic dream - I dreamt that we were going to Disneyland Paris with my entire family, including cousins and granpa and granma, where I ate some cotton candy and went through the Haunted House. A week later, I was notified by my mom that ''Surprise! We're going to Disneyland because granpa and granma are celebrating their fifty-year anniversary!'' I don't think I ate any cotton candy while I was there, though.

One I had recently was a mix between Supernatural (the tv-series), Pokémon, and some vaguely futuristic dystopian setting. I was a shopkeeper's assistant and our store sold things like pokéballs (pokémon included), occult objects like ritual books and mystical ingredients, and buddha statues. The old man who was my boss was a Mr. Myagi type although he didn't teach me any karate. We sold a Raichu, a blessed dagger and a few books before the Generic Government Agents in black suits and sunglasses came by and buried us in paperwork. Literally. I 'passed out' under the mountain of paperwork and had a 'dream' of a buddha statue coming to life and giving me a prophecy that he never finished because I wake up. In real life, not in my dream, that is.

Another was a cross between the modern-day part of Assassin's Creed, the Fast and the Furious (as far as the hot women and sexy cars part go, at least) and my old highschool. I was looking for my then-girlfriend in said school, going through some official channels like the dean but also the school cafeteria. After failing to locate her, I took a conveniently placed boat that was right outside the door of the school on the shore of a quite inconveniently placed lake (that wasn't there in reality, just to clarify) I went to some island, discovered a hidden cave, did a jumping puzzle and discovered I was in fact an Assassin. Cue some sirens, and I find myself looking at some hot chicks robbing a bank and getting away in a Lamborghini. Being notified that they were in fact Templars, I immediately gave chase in my own car (that I can't remember the brand of) through a highway tunnel, before a small Cessna plane came falling out of the sky, crashing directly into their car, as one of the wings broke off and bounced into my own, waking me up.

Tl;dr: Dreamtime usually means storytime for me.

Aug 27, 2012#136

Bubble181

Wahad said:
Another I had when I was twelve years old, was something of a prophetic dream - I dreamt that we were going to Disneyland Paris with my entire family, including cousins and granpa and granma, where I ate some cotton candy and went through the Haunted House. A week later, I was notified by my mom that ''Surprise! We're going to Disneyland because granpa and granma are celebrating their fifty-year anniversary!'' I don't think I ate any cotton candy while I was there, though.

Oh, so you're the one who has been causing glitches in the Matrix these past few years. We've been looking all over for you. Would it have been that bad just to eat a bit of cotton candy?
Don't worry, though, we're deploying a team to rectify the situation as we speak. Be aware that thousands of ~~perfectly good batteries~~ lives were lost due to your failure to conform to precalculated procedure.

Aug 28, 2012#137

GasBandit

Aug 28, 2012#138

Officer_Charon

Fucking. This.

Aug 28, 2012#139

Ravenpoe

LittleSin said:
I dreamed that I was trying to get Jet into a private a school and I was being given a tour of the futuristic facilities. The power went out during the tour due to a sudden volcano in the sky (WTF?) and we had to wait to be evacuated.

The staff was starting to act weird, all nervous and shit..then there was this ROAR. Turns out they were also cloning dinosaurs in the school and the power being out took down the fences. Due to the raining lava outside we couldn't leave so Jet and I spent time using the staff as canon fodder while we tried to excape. I talking gecko led us to the underground cave where we met the lead Utahraptor who decided to let us stay as long we operated the doors for them.

So. Yeh.

Clever girl...

You feel asleep watching TNT (does that channel still exist?)

Sep 2, 2012#140

Yoshimickster

Ninety percent of my dreams are a culmination of pop-culture icons arguing or talking to each other. I am a creature of my generation what can I say?

Oct 4, 2012#141

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I befriended a homeless man while dining at a local mexican restaurant, and we discovered 50's era technology in a hidden room there that was designed to detect and track butt-shaped weather formations. And then somebody from work surreptitiously watched me type in my password into a console and thus had free run of all my digital stuff.

Oct 4, 2012#142

fade

I had a dream the other night that it was some undefined time in the future where there were large telescreens in public places constructed from hexagonal tiles. We were watching as a comet called The String slowly made its way toward the moon. After a few months, The String struck the top of the moon, which happened to be full at the time. The moon turned red, I guess because its albedo changed with the impact. A D-shaped sliver broke off in slow motion as we watched, and began to fall toward the Earth. The telescreen showed everything zoomed in, but we could see it happen behind the screens to the actual moon, which drove home the reality of it. Over the coming months, we watched this red sliver fall, and scientists projected possible trajectories. No one knew where it was going to hit. The sliver was dubbed The Damocles. I remember reporters talking in solemn voices, and just not wanting to watch anymore. When it got closer, we could see the sliver looming in the sky, hazy behind the blue, but in full 3D detail. No one wanted the sliver to hit their part of the earth. We all knew, but wouldn't say, that it didn't matter where it hit anyway. There were mass organized suicides by people who didn't want to experience the terror of the Damocles crashing into them. I woke up then, so I don't know what happened.

Oct 4, 2012#143

GasBandit

fade said:
I had a dream the other night that it was some undefined time in the future where there were large telescreens in public places constructed from hexagonal tiles. We were watching as a comet called The String slowly made its way toward the moon. After a few months, The String struck the top of the moon, which happened to be full at the time. The moon turned red, I guess because its albedo changed with the impact. A D-shaped sliver broke off in slow motion as we watched, and began to fall toward the Earth. The telescreen showed everything zoomed in, but we could see it happen behind the screens to the actual moon, which drove home the reality of it. Over the coming months, we watched this red sliver fall, and scientists projected possible trajectories. No one knew where it was going to hit. The sliver was dubbed The Damocles. I remember reporters talking in solemn voices, and just not wanting to watch anymore. When it got closer, we could see the sliver looming in the sky, hazy behind the blue, but in full 3D detail. No one wanted the sliver to hit their part of the earth. We all knew, but wouldn't say, that it didn't matter where it hit anyway. There were mass organized suicides by people who didn't want to experience the terror of the Damocles crashing into them. I woke up then, so I don't know what happened.

Sounds like it would have been an interesting novel, with the right writing.

Oct 6, 2012#144

North_Ranger

Last night I dreamt I was being shot at in my own home by a gang of pissed-off junkie Irishmen for kidnapping one of their own. Everywhere I tried to hide, the fuckers were shooting at me. I didn't want to die, but they refused to negotiate and James Cosmo was dead, dammit.

Sons of Anarchy + stress + pain in my side post-procedure (the kidney drain needed changing) + medication = that dream.

Oct 8, 2012#145

Officer_Charon

Last night I had an odd one... I was working at a Catholic boarding school as a security guard, but there was some sort of covert war going on against the paranormal, specifically vampires. I had ended up becoming suspected of being turned into a vampire, and was showing one of the nuns in charge of the armory that I hadn't been turned by walking through sunlight pouring through specially-designed windows that pooled the light in cross-shapes. The nun wasn't impressed, and walked through one of the pools of light, showing me her fangs and biting her lips, drawing blood. She said "Not all vampires are affected the same way, as you can see. Don't worry about me: the church has sanctioned me."

Before I could follow this one to it's (fascinating) conclusion, I got woken up by a two year-old with a glowstick. I may have to write this one out...

Oct 8, 2012#146

Gusto

It's all been Inception-y metadreaming for me recently.

Oct 30, 2012#147

checkeredhat

I dreamt I got stabbed last night. It was terrifying. I woke up in actual pain, and breathin heavily and sweating and everything.
I usually enjoy my so called nightmares, and am glad I tend to slip back in to them after briefly waking up. They're fun. But this one was different, it wasn't a horror-y thing where I was being chased by some villain or anything.
It was night in the dream. I was hanging out with 3 of my friends from college, in the backyard of one of my neighbour's from back home. We were just hanging out, shootin' the shit, and someone came up with the idea to walk down to the beach. Someow in my dream, I lagged pretty far behind my friends and lost sight of them briefly in the dark. I don't know how that happened, they just walked way faster than me. But my road back home is right off the beach, so it's not like I was lost or anything. Made it to the beach, and my friends were there, with two other people, all facing the lake. One of the other people I recognized as another of our friends from college. The last one, though, was a big guy (presumably), wearing a hoody, and I never saw his face. I ran up to join my friends, who it seemed must know this other guy, and as I crossed the street and joined them, I asked "What's up". They just backed away from me. And then the guy in the hood turned and rushed me in the blink of an eye, bodychecking me and driving a knife into my gut. And I woke up in pain.

Oct 30, 2012#148

GasBandit

checkeredhat said:
I dreamt I got stabbed last night. It was terrifying. I woke up in actual pain, and breathin heavily and sweating and everything.
I usually enjoy my so called nightmares, and am glad I tend to slip back in to them after briefly waking up. They're fun. But this one was different, it wasn't a horror-y thing where I was being chased by some villain or anything.
It was night in the dream. I was hanging out with 3 of my friends from college, in the backyard of one of my neighbour's from back home. We were just hanging out, shootin' the shit, and someone came up with the idea to walk down to the beach. Someow in my dream, I lagged pretty far behind my friends and lost sight of them briefly in the dark. I don't know how that happened, they just walked way faster than me. But my road back home is right off the beach, so it's not like I was lost or anything. Made it to the beach, and my friends were there, with two other people, all facing the lake. One of the other people I recognized as another of our friends from college. The last one, though, was a big guy (presumably), wearing a hoody, and I never saw his face. I ran up to join my friends, who it seemed must know this other guy, and as I crossed the street and joined them, I asked "What's up". They just backed away from me. And then the guy in the hood turned and rushed me in the blink of an eye, bodychecking me and driving a knife into my gut. And I woke up in pain.

Is your light fixture still on the ceiling, perchance?

Oct 31, 2012#149

Emrys

I drempt Shego was jumping up and down on my bed and giggling. She wasn't brandishing a knife, so things were cool there. Maybe she just wanted to dance with the doomweasels.
My painkillers give me weird-ass dreams.

Oct 31, 2012#150

Gusto

checkeredhat said:
I dreamt I got stabbed last night. It was terrifying. I woke up in actual pain, and breathin heavily and sweating and everything.

This... kinda happened to me tonight too, but with the added twist that my ridiculous subconscious likes to give me "meta" dreams.

I dreamt I was sleeping, and woke up to see my dad in my bedroom charging at me with a spear. Then I actually woke up, screaming.

Nov 7, 2012#151

David

Dreamed that I had started dating a girl in my class, found out after the fact that she was only 16, then backpedaled hard out of the relationship before being accused of pulling an Icarus. It was freaking weird.

I guess the moral of the dream is if you're dating a chick from your college, double check that she's not a concurrent student from one of the local high schools.

Armchair Psychology self-diagnosis: relationships, specifically whether I'm ready to try them again or not, is something that's been on my mind lately. This girl I dreamed about is someone in my class I've recently started talking to, I still don't know her very well, but she's been fun to be around and I'm starting to kind of like her so far. The dream could be a reflection that I'm still harboring fears that an attempt at a relationship will end, not just in a "didn't work out" kind of way, but in a catastrophic disaster kind of way.

Nov 7, 2012#152

GasBandit

David said:
I guess the moral of the dream is if you're dating a chick from your college, double check that she's not a concurrent student from one of the local high schools.

I had an uncle in theater that had a similar situation... turned out the chick was on some AP internship program from a montessouri school to participate in theater. He had to run flailing his arms as fast as possible.

Nov 8, 2012#153

Yoshimickster

I had a dream where I was playing with my new phone, just flipping it over and over again. And then the top part seperated from the bottom part. I thought it was broken but it turned out the two pieces were magnetically attracted to each other. But no matter how many times I put them back they wouldn't be in the same shape. And when I thought it was back to normal, the key pad looked completely different. Like it was some super high-tech future divice.

Also during the dream all I could see was my phone, not me, not the surrounding area, just my phone. Weird dream.

Feb 1, 2013#154

tegid

Last night I dreamt, among other things, that 'Gilgamesh' was some kind of title here and we were having the annual contest to see who was the next Gilgamesh and Gilgamesh(Jiarn) didn't want to give it up and he was like the bad guy (his previous avatar) that wanted to win the contest really bad and was violent about it or wanted to kill other contestants or something like that (don't remember this part very well, I think the contest was something physical in some sort of digital world).

Feb 1, 2013#155

Chad Sexington

Gilgamesh Why you gotta be like that, man? You had your turn!

Feb 1, 2013#156

Bowielee

I had 2 weird dreams last night. One where I was staying in this huge hotel for some sort of celebration. All I remember was that I was running all over the place and was never able to stop at the hundreds of awesome shops all around the place.

The second was one of the ones where I wasn't sure I was dreaming or not, so when I woke up I was really releaved. I dreamed that in order to pay for college, I had to steal money from my employer. It was going off without a hitch in the dream, but I constantly had a feeling of guilt about doing it. I was extremely relieved when I woke up and realized it was a dream. It had somewhat of a point to it in that in some ways, you can never go back and have to live with your choices.

Feb 1, 2013#157

David

I hate dreams that guilt you. When I was still with a girlfriend I had a dream about sleeping with someone else then feeling like such a piece of shit.

Feb 1, 2013#158

GasBandit

I had a dream where spider man was shooting captain america's shield out of hawkeye's bow and had thor's hammer coming out of his knuckles like wolverine claws.

And was a bad guy.

Feb 1, 2013#159

Gilgamesh

tegid said:
Last night I dreamt, among other things, that 'Gilgamesh' was some kind of title here and we were having the annual contest to see who was the next Gilgamesh and Gilgamesh(Jiarn) didn't want to give it up and he was like the bad guy (his previous avatar) that wanted to win the contest really bad and was violent about it or wanted to kill other contestants or something like that (don't remember this part very well, I think the contest was something physical in some sort of digital world).

I leave the violence to my sibling, I'm more like Wolf:

So basically, noone's getting my title

Feb 1, 2013#160

Yoshimickster

There was this Catwoman looking lady jumping out of my door-way, onto a van. She saw something strange in the van, right before she could say what it was I woke up. I hate when my dreams have cliff hangers.

Mar 4, 2013#161

ThatNickGuy

Okay, this one was un-freaking-believably awesome.

So somehow, I wound up guest starring on an episode of Community. All the regulars were there, though I don't remember anything aside from being in Greendale. It was just a regular day at the school...

...when the ghost of an old hockey player starts appearing and body checking everyone on their left side! Okay, maybe like a mix of Scooby Doo and Community. Dream logic.

Anyway, panic ensues until someone remembers that the hockey player committed suicide after being shunned by the community for changing his usual hockey playing M.O. from aggressive, penalty-gaining offensiveman to attempting to score the winning goal...and missing so horribly that the opposing team shot a goal as a result. His name became worse than mud. At which point, I turned to Jeff and said, "Remember? Jerry Mud? #42?" (Which, heh, I'm totally using that line sometime, somewhere. Probably Dill.)

However, we remembered that this guy had a weakness: he just couldn't check someone from the right side. He was horrible at it. So every time he appeared, I shouted, "No no no! Turn around! No, turn this way! Now, push up against the wall! Keep your left side against the boards"

I guess that pissed him off because the next thing I knew, he appeared in front of me, headbutted me as hard as he could, and disappeared...

...which is when I flopped incredibly hard onto the ground, face first. Imagine Christopher Lloyd passing out after having a shot of whiskey in Back to the Future III. A reference which will come in handy because while I was out and people were trying to think of ways to bring me out of it...Christopher Lloyd himself appeared!

Quickly, he brewed together what he called 'Wake up Juice,' which in reality was 'Swamp Water' (a mix of every type of soda available, usually at a fast food joint). He had them turn me over and as they started making me drink it, I took the cup and started gulping it myself.

Finishing it, I gasped a thank you...and then bolted to my feet, hands at my throat and screamed at the top of my lungs...and dropped back unconscious again. Heh, again, for anyone who's seen Back to the Future III, that should sound pretty familiar.

And here's the funniest part: immediately after this? I woke up and my mind refused to let me get back to sleep until I came on here and posted. Hoping I'll have a conclusion to it when I go to sleep, but don't bet on it.

Mar 4, 2013#162

Emrys

Hopped up on the goofballs again, I see.

Mar 4, 2013#163

GasBandit

I dreamed I was in the middle of the bolshevik revolution. Icky icky gedditoff. Probably because of the book I'm reading.

Mar 4, 2013#164

Chad Sexington

I have discovered if I take only a half dose of my sleeping pills, I have crazy and intense dreams. I intend to use this knowledge.

May 28, 2013#165

BananaHands

So last night I was in a machine shop helping my brother film this machine with some sort of lift, right? Not too unusual. He IS an engineer and he does bring me along to a lot of installs to film. So things are going great when all of a sudden...

Well, a yell. Something went wrong. The machine turned on when it wasn't supposed to and there was a lady below what seemed to be some sort of lift-like machine. Things go haywire. Some sort of cord snaps and there's a wire bouncing around full of electricity and this lady is being crushed by this machine as my brother and I watch in horror.

It wasn't until after the machine had pressed firmly against the ground were we able to raise it. We approached to see if there was any hope that she was alive. Of course, this is when her mangled body sprung up and started twitching and walking towards us and letting out a guttural "Yoooooooooooouuuuuuu....".

So of course, we ran.

Of course, she followed me. Obstacles after obstacles seemed to make getting away from this twitching, mangled horror that just kept saying 'Yooouuuuuuuuuu" between gurgles near impossible. It was then that I heard a door slam.

Oh. I was dreaming.

I also couldn't move. Perhaps it was the melatonin, but being woken up so suddenly left me in this sleep paralysis where I was completely aware of everything around me, yet my body refused to move. Also, it didn't help that what woke me up was (what I now know to be the drunken shuffling of my roommate coming home in the middle of the night) the sound of someone just kind of stumbling through my kitchen. It seriously felt like 20 minutes of me just trying to tell my legs to move.

So yeah, that was fun. :confused:

Jun 29, 2013#166

fade

The other night I had a dream that the police came to my dojo to recruit help against a new plant-controlling supervillain named Chloro Phil.

Jun 29, 2013#167

Chad Sexington

fade said:
The other night I had a dream that the police came to my dojo to recruit help against a new plant-controlling supervillain named Chloro Phil.

Yes.

Jul 1, 2013#168

Null

Okay, that was weird. Had a dream about Sheki last night. It was after midnight and she called me to ask if I could drive her to a Denny's. I said okay and when I arrived she was covered in dirt and blood. She said she'd just gotten home from a Zombie Run. We went to Denny's, she cleaned up in the rest room, got pancakes and bacon, and while we ate she was bitching about other students in the nursing program she was enrolled in. Then I woke up.

What the fuck?

Jul 4, 2013#169

Bubble181

Null said:
Okay, that was weird. Had a dream about Sheki last night. It was after midnight and she called me to ask if I could drive her to a Denny's. I said okay and when I arrived she was covered in dirt and blood. She said she'd just gotten home from a Zombie Run. We went to Denny's, she cleaned up in the rest room, got pancakes and bacon, and while we ate she was bitching about other students in the nursing program she was enrolled in. Then I woke up.

What the fuck?

Sheki, the PVP Troll? Or Shego, the HF one-woman army?

Jul 4, 2013#170

Yoshimickster

At first my dream started out normal, loose parody of John Carpenter's "The Thing" (I have very cinematic dreams). But after I killed the aliens disguised as Hooters waitresses I sat down on a couch where a big black wolf and a brown sheep were next to me. I lifted my back pack string to which the wolf bit my hand but in that affectionate silly way that dogs do, and the sheep just cuddled up beside me. I then saw myself in my front lawn where the sheep was running away, and the wolf was sitting patiently.

Whats odd is this isn't the first wolf dream I've had like this where one comes up and playfully bites me, I remember a few months or maybe even a year ago I was in this really crowded place like a fair and in the middle of a crowd there was this wolf. And he did the same kind of biting, all playful and silly way. I wonder what it means.

Jul 4, 2013#171

Bubble181

Yoshimickster said:
At first my dream started out normal, loose [...] Hooters waitresses [...] I sat down on a couch where a big black [censored] and a brown [redacted] were next to me. I [censored] string to which [*****] bit my hand [...] in that [...] s***y way that [censored] do, and the [nope] just cuddled up beside me.

Whats odd is this isn't the first [redacted] dream I've had like this where one comes up and playfully bites me, I remember a few months or maybe even a year ago I was in this really crowded place like a fair and in the middle of a crowd there was this [censored] the same kind of biting, all playful and s***y way. I wonder what it means.

I h ope this clarifies matters.

Jul 4, 2013#172

Yoshimickster

I h ope it does to. BAM-Mickee mocks grammar for once!

Jul 4, 2013#173

Bubble181

Yoshimickster said:
I h ope it does to. BAM-Mickee mocks grammar for once!

GRAMM4R NASI! WE DUN N33D UR TIEP HEAR U HERE.

And yes, Gramm4r nasi is like nasi goreng, but with 4 kinds of meat.

Jul 4, 2013#174

Chad Sexington

Now I want nasi goring

Jul 4, 2013#175

Null

Bubble181 said:
Sheki, the PVP Troll? Or Shego, the HF one-woman army?

I always referred to Shegokigo as Shekigogo, or just Sheki. So, yeah, that's who I meant.

Sep 27, 2013#176

LittleKagsin

I've been debating posting my dreams here (because I dream often, and I dream crazy) but his one acutally made me go "What the...?" when I woke up, so I shall share!

When I first woke up, I remembered more of the beginning, but I don't anymore. Anyway, so I work for a government agency of some sort and there was a threat on our building. So I'm running around ALL OVER to try and find the culprit. And I do. They're on the freeway. So I hop in my car with my partner, who is Chris Hemsworth. We're flying down the freeway, I'm driving and all of a sudden it's backed up. Like crazy, no way we are moving anywhere backed up. I decide it would be a good idea to hoof it, so I get out of the car to start a footchase with said bad person, but I'm in heels. (And let it be known, I ROCKED it, running in heels that is.) Chris runs off the other direction, chasing someone else.

I specifically remember the heels being my metallic purple strappy ones, not sure why, but it was that pair. So, I'm chasing the person and it's a girl, we shoot through someone's living room and the girl from Evil Dead, the one in the cellar, she's hiding underneath these people's entertainment center and tries to grab my foot as I run by. I dodge and parkour flip over their coffee table. As we exit onto the back patio, we're in an airport and I am sprinting for all I'm worth. When the person eases up to try and turn, I dive on them and tackle them to the ground. Success! But only just, they fight with me and I wrestle away a small package from them. It has this silly little card wrapped in it with weird writing. Some other government person shows up then and takes the other person away. But I'm suspricious of this new person, I don't trust them at all! We travel back to headquarters to decipher the letter, where I am no help. Because I keep accusing this other person of being in cohorts with the person that we just caught.

Eventually though, we figure it out and go to the building specified on the card, which ends up being that house we ran through earlier.

We go there, and nothing really happens. The creepy girl from Evil Dead keeps trying to talk to me, which freaks me out, so I go hide in a closet. Chris Hemsworth finds me in the closet and we hug. I randomly remember, that in the dream, his t-shirt is really soft and black. Anyway, we hug and he's all 'We did it! We caught them, it's all over." And I'm all, 'Yay!'

I then leave to go wander around the neighborhood and I find my friend Jill (my real life friend) and her and I talk about what just happened, but I can't let slip that I caught the person, so I have to be all 'Yeah, wow, it's so crazy!" then she starts singing Katy Perry's new song 'Roar' to me. I smile and keep wandering. Then I wake up.

So....that was a thing. Normally my dreams are very scary or very violent, so I don't tell many people about them, but this one was just to WTF not to share.

Oct 7, 2013#177

GasBandit

Last night I was tormented by nightmares of yellowjackets constantly giving live birth to other yellowjackets in my living room, and I couldn't move from the couch. The air became more and more filled with angry stinging striped things, the buzzing ever increasing in intensity.

Dec 7, 2013#178

fade

I dreamt last night that I bought a race horse to manage and I named him Horsama Bin Riden.

Dec 7, 2013#179

Cajungal

Did he win?

Dec 10, 2013#180

Officer_Charon

Yesterday, had a dream about driving my patrol car over a covered hole in someone's driveway (don't ask why I was driving in his driveway - I have no idea. I don't do that). In so doing, the cover fell away, and the rear of my car fell into the hole. I was able to drive out of it, only to back into it again after investigating the call I was there for (a burglary, I believe).

Later on, a subject came into the precinct where I was at (Not my actual precinct - it was a building I didn't recognize, but for some reason, I knew it as my precinct). The subject came in, stepped in front of me, and flashed a complex series of gang signs, then stared at me challengingly. I pinned him against the wall, my partner yelled out "There's more of 'em!" and a slew of thugs came into the room, all holding two cellphones stacked in one hand, pointing them like weapons. Not knowing when one would pull out a real gun, I drew down. But when one did flash a gun, and I tried to shoot, my pistol trigger's draw was like 30 pounds - I was fighting to get the trigger pulled. And when it finally did trigger the firing pin, all it did was go click.

Then my alarm went off.

Maybe I'm working too hard?

Dec 10, 2013#181

Chad Sexington

If I jumped into the water - easily 100 stories down - I might live. If I stayed, they would get me. My face is a manic grin, as though this is fun and not terrifying. They're just out of view, coming over the hill. Then they'd be on the bridge, and then...

The water was deep. Water's hard, like hitting concrete, it's not like the movies. I'd probably die anyway. But they wouldn't get me; is that pride? If I'm going to die, I won't let it be them, I'll be the one! What is the point of taking my own life? Or is it optimism? Hope? Is diving the hope that I don't die?

I jump, I twist my body, as little surface area as possible, hit it like an olympic diver, Leigh, you can swim to that island, it can't be that far...

A single thought overwhelms me in the silent fall, and all my fears of my pursuers and the plummet and the swim and the drowning and the hard water disappear. All that remains is:

Hope is the siracha of life.

Dec 10, 2013#182

Cajungal

I had a dream that a giant demon rabbit lived in a hole in my old backyard (about the size of 2 grizzlies). Every time he had a baby, it tried to get me to sell my soul for 3 wishes. And one of them had a terrible heroine addiction and tried to sell me some too.

Dec 10, 2013#183

WasabiPoptart

Behold the cave of Caerbannog!

Dec 10, 2013#184

Cajungal

WasabiPoptart said:
Behold the cave of Caerbannog!

That was my first thought upon waking... that and "Nyquil is awesome."

Dec 30, 2013#185

Yoshimickster

I dreamt that the pool filter I was soaking in cleaning solution disintegrated into the bucket. Scariest nightmare ever.

Dec 31, 2013#186

Cajungal

Fucking pregnancy dreams!

Dec 31, 2013#187

sixpackshaker

Cajungal said:
Fucking pregnancy dreams!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Dec 31, 2013#188

Cajungal

sixpackshaker said:
CONGRATULATIONS!!!

You shut your whore mouth.

Sent from my ASUS Transformer Pad TF700T using Tapatalk

Feb 20, 2014#189

Emrys

Last night I drempt that Cheesy1 pushed me into the sea otter tank at the Monterey Bay Aquarium.

Thanks a lot, @Cheesy1!

Feb 20, 2014#190

Cheesy1

And you loved EVERY minute of it too, I bet!

Feb 20, 2014#191

Emrys

Cheesy1 said:
And you loved EVERY minute of it too, I bet!

Must... keep... naughty...comments...to... self.

Feb 20, 2014#192

GasBandit

Emrys said:
Last night I drempt that Cheesy1 pushed me ...

Cheesy1 said:
And you loved EVERY minute of it too, I bet!

Emrys said:
Must... keep... naughty...comments...to... self.

But I mustn't!

Feb 20, 2014#193

Emrys

Love you too, @GasBandit.

Feb 20, 2014#194

WasabiPoptart

That video was otterly appropriate. (Too much?)

Feb 20, 2014#195

Emrys

WasabiPoptart said:
That video was otterly appropriate. (Too much?)

Never too much.

Feb 20, 2014#196

GasBandit

Emrys said:
Never too much.

I dunno about "never."

Feb 20, 2014#197

WasabiPoptart

If I laugh my 4 year old is going to want to see what's so funny. I am dying.

Feb 20, 2014#198

sixpackshaker

My lab thinks it is a chew toy.

Feb 20, 2014#199

Cheesy1

Feb 20, 2014#200

GasBandit

sixpackshaker said:
My lab thinks it is a chew toy.

Labs think everything is a chew toy.[DOUBLEPOST=1392938739,1392938493][/DOUBLEPOST]

WasabiPoptart said:
If I laugh my 4 year old is going to want to see what's so funny. I am dying.

You think it's funny, butt it's knot.

Feb 23, 2014#201

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I was at a concert where the Dead Milkmen were performing "Punk Rock Girl" with full orchestral accompaniment and a new extra verse. Apparently my subconscious is in a musical mood. The only lyrics I remembered upon waking were a chunk of the end of the last verse - during the part that usually repeated during the last verse, "Yeah you and me eat fudge banana swirl yeah you and me we will travel round the world - which changed to be "You feel cheated that the song isn't longer, yeah you feel cheated that the ending isn't stronger!" And during the "ending isn't stronger" part the whole thing slowed down and every note was accentuationed with orchestra hits.

Feb 24, 2014#202

Terrik

First I hung out with Rhett and Link for some reason. Then I was having hot sex while fighting off hordes of mobsters while wielding the full arsenal of DOOM weaponry. I ended it all by driving away in a black Lincoln Town car. I just...I dunno.

Mar 1, 2014#203

Kovac

I don't really remember any of it apart from discovering that Ellen Page is an android.

Mar 1, 2014#204

Cog

For a dream thread we need a live action movie about a cartoon from 1980, and JCM needs to come back.

Mar 12, 2014#205

fade

I had a dream that I opened a funeral parlor named "Remains to be Seen".

Mar 12, 2014#206

Yoshimickster

I had a dream where Santa Clause crashed into a school parking lot after somehow blacking out, than tried to go to a therapist about it but ended up fighting her instead. After that I saw my face in the mirror with a LOT of hair that I could not brush. Also my face looked like an amalgam of me and this kid I knew in Elementary school.

Mar 20, 2014#207

Chad Sexington

My dead plant was not dead. It was fine. And I was pleased. I had a shower.

So exciting.

Apr 12, 2014#208

Frank

I just woke up from a dream where I lived with a friend of mine who I never, ever see anymore. Room mate living together, not like, couple living together. Now, she is...well, (I for sure know now that I still do) someone I've always had a MASSIVE crush on, since I first met her. In the dream, we had just moved into this little apartment (that happened to look exactly like one of the condos I lived in as a teenager). She asks me if I would sleep in her bed with her since she sleeps better with someone next to her. Fuck yeah dream! That's how the rest of the dream was. She slept tucked right into me and I held her close. She whispered some stuff at me, but I couldn't understand it. Then I woke up and felt super guilty that I was disappointed that it was my girlfriend in that position even though I love her to bits.

Thanks brain.

The dream felt so good, that I would rank it as easily one of the best dreams I've ever had.

Apr 12, 2014#209

WasabiPoptart

This is a recurring dream. Someone keeps slashing the tires on my sportscar. They only puncture one tire in each dream (haven't noticed if it's the same one or different each time). In every dream, I have a hard time replacing the tire because it's out of stock or has to be special ordered. Actually, when I was dreaming it today the salesperson was rather rude about it since I am always coming in for the same tire that they never have. I'm also still living next to my parents. My house doesn't have a garage. My parents have a two car garage with my mom's car and dad's motorcycle in it. They said they won't let me park my car in their garage because they're convinced the same person will mess with their tires. In today's dream I was trying to figure out where I could put a camera or how I could sit up all night to catch the person doing it.[DOUBLEPOST=1397328601,1397328051][/DOUBLEPOST]

Frank said:
*snip*
Thanks brain.

The dream felt so good, that I would rank it as easily one of the best dreams I've ever had.

I had a dream like this once when my husband was in Africa for 7 months. It was about a friend of mine and was so incredibly real. We weren't living together, but we were in this place that was full of soft filtered morning light, warm blankets, marshmallowy pillows, etc. It was amazing. When I first woke up, but wasn't entirely awake, I felt like I was on cloud 9. When I fully woke up, felt like a cheating jackass and hated myself for the rest of the day.

Apr 13, 2014#210

Null

My subconscious doesn't like me very much. This is one of my recurring dreams:

I'm driving through dense city traffic at way too high a speed, trying to get my friend (sometimes a local friend, an ex-girlfriend, friend from college, sometimes an online friend I've met that doesn't live nearby, sometimes just my mental image of an online friend, etc) to a hospital. But every direct route is blocked, and they keep getting weaker from sickness or blood loss, or something, and I can't get them there, and I'm just plowing into things, running people down, out of control, and just making it worse. I can't stop, and I'm not getting any closer, and when I try and reassure them that we're almost there, just hang on, they start cursing me out for being a useless burden that they've never liked, only pitied, and as the car crashed and begins to roll, they tell me they regret ever wasting their time on me.

And then I wake up.

Apr 13, 2014#211

Frank

Null said:
My subconscious doesn't like me very much. This is one of my recurring dreams:

I'm driving through dense city traffic at way too high a speed, trying to get my friend (sometimes a local friend, an ex-girlfriend, friend from college, sometimes an online friend I've met that doesn't live nearby, sometimes just my mental image of an online friend, etc) to a hospital. But every direct route is blocked, and they keep getting weaker from sickness or blood loss, or something, and I can't get them there, and I'm just plowing into things, running people down, out of control, and just making it worse. I can't stop, and I'm not getting any closer, and when I try and reassure them that we're almost there, just hang on, they start cursing me out for being a useless burden that they've never liked, only pitied, and as the car crashed and begins to roll, they tell me they regret ever wasting their time on me.

And then I wake up.

Neurosis dreams. I KNOW THEE WELL.

----

I cannot get that dream I had two posts above out of my head. It's dumb, and it's wracking me with guilt.

Apr 13, 2014#212

Yoshimickster

It started with me watching an episode of Parks and Recreation where after being close to a flower that makes a substance similar to margarine, Chris and Leslie lose their sense. After that, the same thing happened to me and it was FREAKY! I could honestly feel the absence of sense, it was too real.

Also I'm not sure if this was in the same dream, but I went to a comic store and they had every volume of Ninja turtles- EXCEPT the one after the one I had last read. This is my version of hell.

Apr 13, 2014#213

WasabiPoptart

Last night I dreamt that my daughter and I were coming home and I realized someone had broken into the house. Nothing was out of place, but I knew someone was in the house who did not belong there. After looking around I found a woman hiding in the shower. She insisted that she was not doing anything wrong although she was in my house, I didn't know her, and she broke in. I put her in a bedroom while I called the police, but found her trying to sneak out of the house. I caught her, got her in an armlock, and put her face down on the floor (I think I took lessons from @Officer_Charon or @Frank in this dream). Then the detectives showed up. They went straight to the kitchen to get coffee and something to eat! They kept bumbling around my house until woman started yelling that I was hurting her (at this point I was also sitting on her back while she was in the armlock). That got the detectives' attention. They put handcuffs on the woman and took her out. Then they talked to me about how nice the house is...and I woke up.

Apr 13, 2014#214

fade

I used to have astral walk-type dreams all the time when I was a kid, but I haven't had them in a while. The other night I had one. I was flying over the neighborhood, seeing the tops of houses in great detail. I had died, and I felt good. I didn't remember how I died, but I knew it was doing something right or heroic. I flew a dark water tank holding dolphins, and on the other side, in dim light, an older version of my wife sat. She could sort of see me, and she was sad, but also satisfied that I died well. I said goodbye, and knew I had to leave. Then I woke up. In the dark, I started puzzling that that was the real me, and that I had just been reincarnated. Or rather that one only truly dies when all possible lives are exhausted. Kind of like a marriage of dharmic and Christian faiths.

Apr 14, 2014#215

Chad Sexington

WasabiPoptart said:
This is a recurring dream. Someone keeps slashing the tires on my sportscar. They only puncture one tire in each dream (haven't noticed if it's the same one or different each time). In every dream, I have a hard time replacing the tire because it's out of stock or has to be special ordered. Actually, when I was dreaming it today the salesperson was rather rude about it since I am always coming in for the same tire that they never have. I'm also still living next to my parents. My house doesn't have a garage. My parents have a two car garage with my mom's car and dad's motorcycle in it. They said they won't let me park my car in their garage because they're convinced the same person will mess with their tires. In today's dream I was trying to figure out where I could put a camera or how I could sit up all night to catch the person doing it.[DOUBLEPOST=1397328601,1397328051][/DOUBLEPOST]

I had a dream like this once when my husband was in Africa for 7 months. It was about a friend of mine and was so incredibly real. We weren't living together, but we were in this place that was full of soft filtered morning light, warm blankets, marshmallowy pillows, etc. It was amazing. When I first woke up, but wasn't entirely awake, I felt like I was on cloud 9. When I fully woke up, felt like a cheating jackass and hated myself for the rest of the day.

Null said:
My subconscious doesn't like me very much. This is one of my recurring dreams:

I'm driving through dense city traffic at way too high a speed, trying to get my friend (sometimes a local friend, an ex-girlfriend, friend from college, sometimes an online friend I've met that doesn't live nearby, sometimes just my mental image of an online friend, etc) to a hospital. But every direct route is blocked, and they keep getting weaker from sickness or blood loss, or something, and I can't get them there, and I'm just plowing into things, running people down, out of control, and just making it worse. I can't stop, and I'm not getting any closer, and when I try and reassure them that we're almost there, just hang on, they start cursing me out for being a useless burden that they've never liked, only pitied, and as the car crashed and begins to roll, they tell me they regret ever wasting their time on me.

And then I wake up.

I realise this sounds like claptrap, and I can only say anecdotally that 'it worked for me,' but with recurring dreams, a strategy I tried was to write it down, as detailed as possible (from whatever point of view; personal, third-person, whatever you want). Do it first sometime in the day when it's clear to you.

Then, every time you wake up from it, have a pad, and write it down again, detailed as possible. After the third or so, before you go to sleep, write down the dream, but pick a place where you want to have control. Write what you do, and how the dream goes. Now, every time you have that dream, write down your version of the dream.

It took me about a month, but eventually I was able to know I was dreaming at the point I wrote about, and I haven't had that dream since.

Apr 14, 2014#216

WasabiPoptart

I don't mind having that recurring dream other than I feel frustrated when I'm trying to get the tire replaced. I think I know why I'm having it though. I want to pay closer attention to what's going on in my life when I have that dream again to see if it coincides with what I think is bringing it up.

May 26, 2014#217

GasBandit

So.. I had this wierd dream where I'm over at my grandparents house for the holidays, but for some reason Mike "Gabe" Krahulik and his wife are there. And she straight up offers me a handjob right in front of him. So I called her bluff and she backed out.

Wut.

May 26, 2014#218

LordRendar

I dreamt I was eating a burger with your president. Then we smoked some weed.
It was weird.

Jul 12, 2014#219

Yoshimickster

I had a couple dreams, one was a very lucid dream where I was in what looked like a blue class room. I didn't do much but it was still amazing just walking around in what felt like a real space.

Another dream I was hanging out with my friend Tom and...my worst friend showed up. I immediately yelled at him "GET OUT!" The thing is...this is a pattern in my dreams. I can't get this asshole out of my head, I want to forget him, I want to stop thinking about him, but every other dream he shows up! And when I'm not lucid, you know what we're doing? Hanging out, like we used to before he became an awful con-man. It pisses me off that part of me still wants this douchebag to be my friend when he's hurt me and my friends so much. I just want him out of my dreams.

Jul 28, 2014#220

GasBandit

I had a dream where a large armadillo somehow got in the house, and I had to tackle it and carry it outside. It gave me leprosy, and my hands started rotting off. I can't help but think @ThatNickGuy is somehow responsible for this.

Jul 28, 2014#221

sixpackshaker

GasBandit said:
I had a dream where a large armadillo somehow got in the house, and I had to tackle it and carry it outside. It gave me leprosy, and my hands started rotting off. I can't help but think @ThatNickGuy is somehow responsible for this.

I'd fist bump you but, I'm worried for your fingers.

Jul 28, 2014#222

GasBandit

sixpackshaker said:
I'd fist bump you but, I'm worried for your fingers.

Let me tell you, in the dream, it hurt like hell. I was sort of surprised after I woke up that my hands weren't covered with cat scratches or something.

Jul 28, 2014#223

ThatNickGuy

GasBandit said:
I had a dream where a large armadillo somehow got in the house, and I had to tackle it and carry it outside. It gave me leprosy, and my hands started rotting off. I can't help but think @ThatNickGuy is somehow responsible for this.

Are you saying it was...DILLiberate?!

Aug 6, 2014#224

GasBandit

Man, had a couple of really wierd ones last night.

The first one took place in the setting of the TV version of Walking Dead. But in addition to the usuals, the cast from Parks and Rec are there too. A turning point is reached when the zombies actually manage to zombify Chris Traeger and Ron Swanson. They teach the zombies to talk, shoot guns, and drive cars. The remaining live humans are quickly overcome. Soon it's just me and Rick left, and we're captured rather quickly after that. As the last 2 humans, the zombies march us up onto a platform to be killed in front of a gathered huge throng of zombies as an audience to their final victory, when Rick pulls a remote detonator out of his coat, and hits the plunger. In the distance, a fireball crashes out of the roof of an old factory and starts arcing through the sky, and Rick starts laughing and shaking his head. "What's so funny?" I ask him. "It was supposed to be just a bomb, not a missile." Anyway, when it's high overhead, the fireball explodes in a huge nuclear reaction, vaporizing us all.

So I wake up, go to the bathroom, get some water, go back to bed.

I'm back in high school again. Great, another one of THESE dreams. And I can't skip classes like I usually do in "back in school" dreams because my stepmother is there observing. Turns out my second period mythology class is being held in the cafeteria because the room is being remodeled, and there's a whole irrelevant side story about how the remodeling work was supposed to be done pro bono but then the vice principal sort of sneaks in "well, you might have to buy them a case of champagne or something." Anyway, I'm attending class in the cafeteria, but now my cat is also there, and he starts chewing on my toes. My stepmother says "He must need some cheese. Go get him some cheese!" So I walk to this specialty cheese shop on the corner and while I browse the cheeses I accidentally drop my phone and a few pieces break off. I gather it all into a static bag (don't know WHY I happen to have an empty static bag on me), and once in the bag they begin to melt and bubble and boil, the bag getting hotter and hotter. Everyone in the store is looking at me like I've done something wrong, and when I say "What?" a woman points to a small sticker on the bottom of the static bag that I didn't see before that says "DO NOT PUT DAMAGED CELL PHONES IN STATIC BAG." Some of the liquid from the bag splashes out on my hand, burning it, and another shop patron throws a handful of flour on my hand to soothe it. I buy some Jalepeno cheese and start walking home.

So. Busy night.

Aug 6, 2014#225

fade

First one is a retrospective on your last relationship. You got together with her later than everyone else, and you began to simultaneously think of yourself as a holdout for sanity, while judging yourself as abnormal. When you finally obtained the relationship you desired, well, things fell apart dramatically. The bomb becoming a missile is a metaphor for your recent discoveries and how it changed your mourning.

The second is rehearsal for a new relationship. Or at least sex. I mean, the cat is an obvious metaphor for lady bits, and cheese is used to bait traps. It seems like you might be feeling pressure from people close to you to get back out there. School is the dating game itself, though you recognize that things are different than they used to be--hence the moved class. However, you also feel out of touch, and question your communication skills, since you broke the communication metaphor, and burned yourself with it.

Aug 6, 2014#226

GasBandit

Aug 6, 2014#227

fade

The jalapeno cheese is your penis.

Aug 6, 2014#228

GasBandit

I sure hope I don't try to feed it to the cat.

Aug 6, 2014#229

Yoshimickster

It started out in an arcade where I was playing a sort of multi-player Banjo Kazooie running combat game, when I punched the other guy guns came out of him and then I shot him with one of the guns until I decided to use Kazooie in her gun mode. Also the other guy was a weasel who had a giant magnet in the beginning of the game, but didn't use it once. Also I think Lord Hater from Wander Over Yonder was in there, cos why not. Seemed like fun.

Aug 11, 2014#230

GasBandit

Had another "back to school" dream last night. Only this one was...

I was participating in an R/C car race around the parking lot of my high school but for some reason I had been instructed to use my actual full sized car instead of an R/C one, and I had to drive it in reverse. Naturally this made racing very difficult, and I ended up running over a bus stop, knocking down the sign and demolishing two benches. So I went inside the school to the administration office to tell them what happened, and they presented me a bill for almost $9000 to fix the bus stop, and I said "that's ridiculous, I could fix it myself for much less than that." And they came back with "If you don't pay in 3 days, the fine goes up to $127,000." So I was all like "well good luck collecting that." Then while I was there apparently there was a stack of old referrals on me, and they had me read them and go through them. Most of them were old boring teacher stuff - "disruptive in class in 1989" etc... but one was actually filled out by one of my current coworkers - "Makes it so I actually have to do my job." That gave me a chuckle. Then walking back to my car I saw a girl who I knew back when I was in school (but she was still the age when I knew her), and she saw me and apologized for "killing me." Turns out she did a science fair project involving simulating a volcano and all the people in the town the lava poured through had been assigned names of people she knew, and the little simulated me didn't escape the lava.

So.

Aug 15, 2014#231

Frank

I was shouting in my sleep. I've never done that before. I know because I woke up yelling and my throat is hoarse as if I was letting out guttural death metal growls for an hour straight.

No dream that I can recall.

Aug 19, 2014#232

fade

I had a dream last night that an assassin was after me. I thought my wife and I had gotten away, but I secretly knew better. I was in the middle of the country in an old house, and I kept checking the window at night, sure we'd been followed. Finally we fell asleep, and there was a noise in the house. I woke up not only in the dream, but in real life, having heard my wife whisper my name in the way she does when she's scared at night.

The thing is, my wife and kids are at her mother's in FL for the week, so that was a bit unsettling. I was so certain I had heard her.

Aug 19, 2014#233

drawn_inward

I had a Halforums dream a few weeks ago. The majority of you all were in it. We were at a hotel convention hall for some tech-type convention, and we all happened to be there without realizing we were all going to attend it at the same time. Once we realized it we all hung out together. I remember seeing a bunch of you guys. It was weird to have a dream about a bunch of people that I haven't met.

Aug 19, 2014#234

PatrThom

drawn_inward said:
I had a Halforums dream a few weeks ago. The majority of you all were in it. We were at a hotel convention hall for some tech-type convention, and we all happened to be there without realizing we were all going to attend it at the same time. Once we realized it we all hung out together. I remember seeing a bunch of you guys. It was weird to have a dream about a bunch of people that I haven't met.

You're really obsessed with unlocking that "most Halforums members met" achievement, aren't you?

--Patrick

Aug 19, 2014#235

GasBandit

fade said:
I had a dream last night that an assassin was after me. I thought my wife and I had gotten away, but I secretly knew better. I was in the middle of the country in an old house, and I kept checking the window at night, sure we'd been followed. Finally we fell asleep, and there was a noise in the house. I woke up not only in the dream, but in real life, having heard my wife whisper my name in the way she does when she's scared at night.

The thing is, my wife and kids are at her mother's in FL for the week, so that was a bit unsettling. I was so certain I had heard her.

Aug 19, 2014#236

drawn_inward

PatrThom said:
You're really obsessed with unlocking that "most Halforums members met" achievement, aren't you?

--Patrick

There can be only one!

Aug 19, 2014#237

Ravenpoe

I had my first lucid dream that I can remember last night. I dreamt I was playing WoW, when all of a sudden I got hacked, and a stupid hollywood style prompt opened up with the hacker taunting me and telling me how she (I knew it was a she, somehow) was going to be stealing all of my life information.

And that's when I realized how none of this made any sense, and attempted to hurt myself to see if I was dreaming. When no amount of pinching produced any pain, I realized I was in a dream, closed my laptop (to the prompt of "NOOOOOO!" on the screen) and started trying to fly.

I never could fly, but I did manage to levitate a ball in my hand.

Aug 29, 2014#238

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed Pauline came back to me. She had reasonable, believable, forgivable explanations for why she faked her death, logically explained how she'd never two-timed me, and apologized for leaving me to twist in the wind for the past year. And in the dream, I instantly forgave and took her back.

Upon waking I can't remember any of the explanations.

I guess my subconscious still desperately wants to magically rewind back to when (I thought) we were happy.

Aug 30, 2014#239

Terrik

I know what dreams my finance is having :unibrow:

Only an indeterminable time until we're reunited.

Come on Obama, a legal immigrant wants to come here. Get with the program.

Sep 2, 2014#240

Cajungal

I'm constantly dreaming of the same weird beach. There's no gentle slope from shore to water. It's just this sandy plateau that drops off into often shark-infested waters. The water is murky and full of seaweed and strange gelatinous masses that sort of look like jellyfish, but not really. I always look over into the water and almost jump in, but then I don't because I see the sharks. The sand is cold and kind of a sick-looking yellow. If there's a beach house, it always looks like some dilapidated Escher homage.

Sep 8, 2014#241

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed some jerkass walked in off the street and into one of our broadcast studios and just started pushing every button he saw as fast as he could. I had to drag him out by the hair and throw him into the street. Somebody photographed me and Kotaku got ahold of it and did a hit piece on me because of all the smack I have talked about them.

Sep 8, 2014#242

Emrys

Cajungal said:
I'm constantly dreaming of the same weird beach. There's no gentle slope from shore to water. It's just this sandy plateau that drops off into often shark-infested waters. The water is murky and full of seaweed and strange gelatinous masses that sort of look like jellyfish, but not really. I always look over into the water and almost jump in, but then I don't because I see the sharks. The sand is cold and kind of a sick-looking yellow. If there's a beach house, it always looks like some dilapidated Escher homage.

Sounds like you're projecting your inner Stephen King.

Sep 10, 2014#243

figmentPez

A couple nights ago I dreamed about my crush. I really thought I was getting over her, but nope. In the dream she was going to some sort of Rocky Horror like show at a movie theater. Then I was there, and talking to her, and we were both dreaming, and I was trying to convince her that it was really me. She didn't look like I picture her, but I still knew that it was her. It was strange, but it made sense in the dream.

More often than not, I hate dreams lately. They're like emotion bombs that go off in the middle of the night, and then I have to deal with the damage the next day. It sucks.

Sep 11, 2014#244

bhamv3

I have a female friend who's the epitome of purity and chastity. She's only had only boyfriend in her life, in a relationship that lasted only about two weeks or so. Since then she's had a string of men interested in her, and she's been interested in some guys, but nothing serious has ever developed. She doesn't actively avoid topics or issues related to sex, but instead she gives off such an aura of purity that when you're around her, dirty topics simply never come up. You guys know the type?

Anyway, she's studying in the UK right now, and we joked that she'll return to Taiwan with a British boyfriend in tow. She nodded serenely and said that it's certainly possible, we'll see what happens. But we all knew that she'd probably never end up with a British boyfriend. She's simply too pure to be sullied by a masculine touch.

So, a few nights ago, I dreamt that I happened to run into her on the street. Everything about her was normal, except she was wearing a BDSM slave collar. I asked her about it, and she said, in her pure and serene manner, "Oh yes, I met a guy and now we're exploring my submissive side. He likes it when I wear this in public."

I WTF'd so hard in my dream I woke up right then and there. I wanted to email her and tell her, "Hey, I dreamt you're in a BDSM relationship" but my wife thought it'd be a bad idea.

Sep 12, 2014#245

bhamv3

bhamv3 said:
I have a female friend who's the epitome of purity and chastity. She's only had only boyfriend in her life, in a relationship that lasted only about two weeks or so. Since then she's had a string of men interested in her, and she's been interested in some guys, but nothing serious has ever developed. She doesn't actively avoid topics or issues related to sex, but instead she gives off such an aura of purity that when you're around her, dirty topics simply never come up. You guys know the type?

Anyway, she's studying in the UK right now, and we joked that she'll return to Taiwan with a British boyfriend in tow. She nodded serenely and said that it's certainly possible, we'll see what happens. But we all knew that she'd probably never end up with a British boyfriend. She's simply too pure to be sullied by a masculine touch.

So, a few nights ago, I dreamt that I happened to run into her on the street. Everything about her was normal, except she was wearing a BDSM slave collar. I asked her about it, and she said, in her pure and serene manner, "Oh yes, I met a guy and now we're exploring my submissive side. He likes it when I wear this in public."

I WTF'd so hard in my dream I woke up right then and there. I wanted to email her and tell her, "Hey, I dreamt you're in a BDSM relationship" but my wife thought it'd be a bad idea.

So, followup to this, today I decided to defy my wife's orders and send this girl a message on Facebook. Our conversation was as follows:

"My wife said I shouldn't tell you this, but I had a dream of you a few nights ago that was quite interesting. It involved you, your boyfriend, and BDSM."

"Hahahaha I have a boyfriend? And what is BDSM?"

"... okay, the wife was right."

Sep 12, 2014#246

jwhouk

Always listen to the wife.

Sep 12, 2014#247

Terrik

Sooo....I had weird dream last night. I dreamed I was talking to an old friend of mine that I use to really like. We talked and talked until we started making out, and then started getting ready to sleep together. Then she morphed into an Asian girl just as we're about to get it on.

I think this means two things.

1. It's been too long since I last got it.

2. I miss my fiance.

or

3. I really have an asian fetish.

Who knows?

Sep 12, 2014#248

fade

4. You've been taking too much of @bhamv3 's tiger penis.

Sep 12, 2014#249

bhamv3

fade said:
4. You've been taking too much of @bhamv3 's tiger penis.

I consider this the most likely possibility.

Sep 12, 2014#250

GasBandit

I dreamed I was playing a pretty good video game last night, sword and sorcery action with rpg elements and co-op multiplayer with a zombie apocalypse bent. Sort of a... Left 4 dead meets Divinity: Original Sin. Was pretty fun. Was kind of a bummer to wake up and realize it doesn't exist.

Sep 12, 2014#251

Enresshou

Last night I dreamed I was at an outdoor party. I was by myself, everybody was reasonably well-dressed, and there was light and laughter. I knew, in that way of knowing within dreams, that I could fly. So I did. I took off into the sky, except the sky looked...wrong, somehow wrinkled. Like it was fabric someone had stretched tight over backing, then let it sag in random places. There was a massive thud, everything shook and quivered, and I'd flown through the sky to the other side.

There was nothing there. Just an endless, empty, black void. No stars, no moon, just emptiness. I looked down and could see where I'd burst through, to the party that was still going on like nothing had happened, but outside of that narrow facade there was just a choking nothing. It was like everyone in the world was an actor lost in their part and I'd accidentally stepped off the stage.

Sep 22, 2014#252

Yoshimickster

I was in my kitchen with my parents, brother, and one of my best friends. THEN- I saw two gradually shape-changing green monsters outside , who when I went to talk to them were there to ask me to join a college called "Mary's university." I said I'd think about it, but then after they told me I would have to have a weapon at all time because it was in a dangerous place. Also by this point we were in my pool for some reason, also we started fighting. I punched one of them and he turned into a monkey, and the other turned into a box with a plant in it. The next day in my dream I was in some sort of warehouse that I think was setting up for a concert, it looked a little bit like a larger version of the Electric factory. Than after I told this guy moving stuff " MAGIC IS REAL! PRAISE TO THE DARK FORCES!" I began to lay down on a couch because I felt sick. Probably from touching the monsters.

Sep 22, 2014#253

Emrys

Yoshimickster said:
I was in my kitchen with my parents, brother, and one of my best friends. THEN- I saw two gradually shape-changing green monsters outside , who when I went to talk to them were there to ask me to join a college called "Mary's university." I said I'd think about it, but then after they told me I would have to have a weapon at all time because it was in a dangerous place. Also by this point we were in my pool for some reason, also we started fighting. I punched one of them and he turned into a monkey, and the other turned into a box with a plant in it. The next day in my dream I was in some sort of warehouse that I think was setting up for a concert, it looked a little bit like a larger version of the Electric factory. Than after I told this guy moving stuff " MAGIC IS REAL! PRAISE TO THE DARK FORCES!" I began to lay down on a couch because I felt sick. Probably from touching the monsters.

What the hell do you eat before going to bed, Yoshi?

Sep 22, 2014#254

fade

Well, I'm going to have to go with Freud on this one. Those monsters were clearly your penis.[DOUBLEPOST=1411410779,1411410738][/DOUBLEPOST]Also, Mary's University is a vagina.

Sep 22, 2014#255

Yoshimickster

Emrys said:
What the hell do you eat before going to bed, Yoshi?

One of the spiciest pasta dishes I've ever had. Also I was drunk, love me drunk dreams.

Sep 22, 2014#256

Emrys

Yoshimickster said:
One of the spiciest pasta dishes I've ever had. Also I was drunk, love me drunk dreams.

Same here. That's wholesome family entertainment.

:popcorn:

Oct 5, 2014#257

ThatNickGuy

Had a really odd dream about meeting my girlfriend's parents. See, the reality is they don't approve of me dating their daughter. It's almost exclusively because I'm 36 and she's 18 - something, I should add, that three months later, still bothers me at times. Her father, from what I've gleaned without meeting him, is a sociopath. Served time in jail for...something. Barged into his daughter's room at 3 in the morning to wake her up and scream at her for dating a 36 year old when he finally believed her. He went as far as to call the police that night and demanded they arrested either me or her because we were dating. The police more or less laughed in his face because she's an adult and I'm not even remotely abusive to her or her son. He's said many disparaging, hurtful, and abusive things to her and makes me wish she could afford to move out. At the moment, I'm not even allowed on their property, let alone in the house.

That's all reality. This was the dream.

I think I spent over night with her because we were getting ready to leave her room together. Since her parents disapproved of me, we were going to sneak out through a screen door in her bedroom (doesn't exist in real life; just a window). But at one point, I saw a blur of motion rush past the door. Looked an awful lot like her father. We shook our heads, thinking he was just being nuts...until I go to get my sneakers that are for some reason outside, on the porch. He took them.

We immediately confront him. Well, I confront him. This would be the first time I officially meet him. He's screaming at me while I'm trying to talk to him in a calm manner, trying to get him to see reason. Though I do admit to calling him a petulant, petty, irrational child or something to that extent. Said his daughter is much more an adult than he is. Eventually, he returned one of my sneakers, and then kept saying he "couldn't find" the other one even though he didn't even look for it.

I woke up while my girlfriend and I walked down the street, away from the shouting sociopath.

Oct 6, 2014#258

bhamv3

I dreamt last night that it was the day of the apocalypse. Scientists had somehow figured out the exact day of the end of the world (something to do with Earth's orbit becoming too close to the sun or something, not sure), and it was today. My wife was with her folks in Tainan, while I was in Taipei. And I called her and said, "Hey, I think maybe we should spend our last moments together."

And then she showed up, and we went on a walk while the sun grew larger and larger in the sky. And we saw a Luxgen car (a Taiwanese brand) and I said, "Hey, for our next car, we should buy local." And she said, "Sure, that sounds good." And we walked on in silence, because we knew we'd never get a chance to buy that car.

And then I woke up and was still so convinced that scientists had found the date of the apocalypse that I immediately grabbed my phone and started googling.

Oct 7, 2014#259

fade

I had a dream I was at Boy Scout camp with my son when a huge storm blew in at night. When it passed, there were still thin clouds--thin enough to see through--and a full moon. I heard a weird noise and just behind the low clouds so that they were casting shadows on them were three fighter jets that were triangular with the point cut off. A few seconds behind were about 30 or more US fighter jets, and I thought, oh shit someone is about to drop a nuke. I went home, from which I was somehow suddenly able to see the downtown Houston skyline lit up at night, and I saw the planes get shot down. One did drop something, but it was destroyed by a US jet.

Later, they were doing the autopsy at the place I work (for some reason) and I held a piece of one of the attacker's skulls. It had been quartered off his head, and was still attached to a heavy chunk of his brain.

The jets were rather frightening, and when I woke up I kept hearing this explosion-like noise in real life. I still don't know what it was, but it probably influenced my dream. I went outside, but I couldn't figure it out. It sounded like it might've been a backhoe or stuff being dropped into a large metal bin. It was 3AM, though.

Oct 7, 2014#260

Officer_Charon

Had a zombiepocalypse dream the other night - I have those fairly frequently. Was clearing houses with my wife, and one that we came across had a basement (which is weird for here, being that we're basically all sitting on swamp... err... marshland). In the basement was a guy chained to a bed, a toddler, and a baby. All zeked. And It was hugely important that I not let my wife down there, because I couldn't let her see the little ones, or what I was going to have to do to them.

And then, ironically enough, she woke me up, saving me from having to do it.

Oct 23, 2014#261

GasBandit

I dreamed I was part of a massive prank the rest of the rolling stones played on Mick Jagger. For a week, I'd just hang around wherever they were, dressing rooms, green rooms, recording studios, just fiddling with things and not saying a word. Mick Jagger would be "who the hell is this guy? What's he doing here?" And the other guys would all say things like "Who are you talking about? There's nobody here but us, Mick." Mick Jagger slowly goes madder and madder because I'm always hanging around and nobody else acknowledges I exist. Even the roadies and managers and whatnot seem to be in on it.

The grand climax comes when they go on stage for a concert. First couple songs are normal, then in the middle of the third song I come out from the side of the stage just doing the "haters gonna hate strut" slowly from one side of the stage to the other. Naturally the band pretends I don't exist, Mick Jagger doesn't want to look like he's having a psychotic break on TV and in front of an audience of thousands, so I continue unimpeded as a slowly do the fat-guy-strut from stage right, right across in front of Mick, and on to stage left. The audience is confused but the bystander effect keeps anybody from doing anything that would tip Mick off.

Finally, after the concert, one of the reporters asks "Mick who was that guy who came out on stage during your third song?" and Jagger just flips his shit "MY GOD YOU CAN SEE HIM TOO?!"

Oct 23, 2014#262

sixpackshaker

GasBandit said:
I dreamed I was part of a massive prank the rest of the rolling stones played on Mick Jagger. For a week, I'd just hang around wherever they were, dressing rooms, green rooms, recording studios, just fiddling with things and not saying a word. Mick Jagger would be "who the hell is this guy? What's he doing here?" And the other guys would all say things like "Who are you talking about? There's nobody here but us, Mick." Mick Jagger slowly goes madder and madder because I'm always hanging around and nobody else acknowledges I exist. Even the roadies and managers and whatnot seem to be in on it.

The grand climax comes when they go on stage for a concert. First couple songs are normal, then in the middle of the third song I come out from the side of the stage just doing the "haters gonna hate strut" slowly from one side of the stage to the other. Naturally the band pretends I don't exist, Mick Jagger doesn't want to look like he's having a psychotic break on TV and in front of an audience of thousands, so I continue unimpeded as a slowly do the fat-guy-strut from stage right, right across in front of Mick, and on to stage left. The audience is confused but the bystander effect keeps anybody from doing anything that would tip Mick off.

Finally, after the concert, one of the reporters asks "Mick who was that guy who came out on stage during your third song?" and Jagger just flips his shit "MY GOD YOU CAN SEE HIM TOO?!"

They are so old now that would likely work.

Oct 23, 2014#263

GasBandit

sixpackshaker said:
They are so old now that would likely work.

I dare say it would have worked when they were younger, too.

Chasing that unicorn and all that.

Nov 5, 2014#264

Yoshimickster

I just got a job somewhere(we were in training I believe), it wasn't very far so I'd bike. Then for some reason, I decided to use a plant that when placed upon my head the leaves would spin around so fast I would fly, and shoes that would give me super speed(though that was harder to control). It was okay at first, but then it started raining and I kept bumping into telephone wires. After I got to work I complained to my coworker Yvette Nicole Brown, a biker just TOOK my seat, and my boss said I didn't care about the job because I was late. Typical.

The rest of the dream was an almost shot for shot rewatch of Lilo and Stitch, spliced in with clips from several movies I saw. Also what I thought to be the newest Bravest Warriors episode, but as you know dream and what not.

Nov 5, 2014#265

Terrik

I had some awfully uncomfortable dreams about a talking lion last night. I also happened to turn on the television to a nature documentary on lions this morning. I don't know what this means.

Nov 5, 2014#266

Null

Terrik said:
I had some awfully uncomfortable dreams about a talking lion last night. I also happened to turn on the television to a nature documentary on lions this morning. I don't know what this means.

It means you're needed in Narnia. Quick, to the nearest wardrobe!

Nov 5, 2014#267

PatrThom

I dreamt that the street I was on had flooded like a river, and I was wading through water up to my armpits (it never occurred to me why the curbs would be high enough that I'd be up to my armpits with no water on the sidewalks but whatever) and I realized after about an hour of this that I still had my phone on my hip and it was likely ruined, and trying to remember when I did my last backup and how/when I would have to get it replaced.

--Patrick

Jan 30, 2015#268

fade

I dreamed I was fighting someone in power armor like iron man. I managed to knock a plate of armor off his arm but I was still not able to really hurt him. But I could use momentum against him, and I realized this was still Texas. So I manipulated him to where I wanted and then knocked the arm with the hole into a fire ant hill. They all got inside of his armor and I was able to take him out.

Though in retrospect that probably happened in the comics before with ant man around.

Jan 30, 2015#269

Yoshimickster

Closest I get to a super hero dream is when I'm just chilling, and then I just jump on the air like CP9 from One Piece. One day I shall make that technique real. An awesome recurring dream I have.

Jan 30, 2015#270

Chad Sexington

I had an intense dream about a beautiful, wonderful girl. I always understood 'girl of your dreams' to be a turn of phrase, but no, now I literally have a girl of my dreams.

Then last night, as my brain's way of telling me I've been playing too much Civ 5, I had a dream about managing all of my friendships and familial relationships through a diplomacy screen.

Jan 30, 2015#271

Cajungal

I keep having dreams where people walk in on jake and i having sex, and they're just talking to us as if everything is normal. Sometimes they're also peeling an orange playing with a baseball while chatting...acting obnoxiously nonchalant. 4 dreams like that this week alone. I think we need a weekend away or something.

Jan 31, 2015#272

Celt Z

I know I've been spending way too much time in here when you guys start showing up in my dreams. I need another hobby.

Jan 31, 2015#273

WasabiPoptart

Cajungal said:
I keep having dreams where people walk in on jake and i having sex, and they're just talking to us as if everything is normal. Sometimes they're also peeling an orange playing with a baseball while chatting...acting obnoxiously nonchalant. 4 dreams like that this week alone. I think we need a weekend away or something.

Do you have a lot of people concerning themselves with your personal life lately?[DOUBLEPOST=1422738551,1422738416][/DOUBLEPOST]

Celt Z said:
I know I've been spending way too much time in here when you guys start showing up in my dreams. I need another hobby.

Yeah I had a dream not too long ago that involved the HFA2 craziness. Funny and yet disturbing.

Jan 31, 2015#274

GasBandit

Celt Z said:
I know I've been spending way too much time in here when you guys start showing up in my dreams. I need another hobby.

WasabiPoptart said:
Yeah I had a dream not too long ago that involved the HFA2 craziness. Funny and yet disturbing.

Jan 31, 2015#275

Cajungal

WasabiPoptart said:
Do you have a lot of people concerning themselves with your personal life lately?[DOUBLEPOST=1422738551,1422738416][/DOUBLEPOST]
Yeah I had a dream not too long ago that involved the HFA2 craziness. Funny and yet disturbing.

Not really. The only major change I can think of is I've been a bit more aloof at work since I'm sort of looking around for another job, and that's been making people approach *me* more in an "are you all right" kind of way...

Jan 31, 2015#276

WasabiPoptart

Eh. Then it sounds like a get away with the mister is in order! Relaxation and chicken fajitas.

Feb 5, 2015#277

Frank

So, I'm on nights right now. So I slept all day.

Today I had the MOST vivid sex dream I've ever had. Not just the sex. Everything leading up to it.

It all started with a fancy dinner party a friend was having. His sister was there. We were all drinking afterwards and she suggested I come home with her. So I did. We get to her weird, giant dream home and she says she's going up stairs. I attempt to follow, but the house is a fucking insane dream house and I end up in the basement. This is usually how my sex dreams go, I sabotage myself somehow like this. Anyways, her dad is doing laundry in the basement and I have a conversation with him about hunting or something, it's really awkward.

Here is where I wake up. I'm feel like wow, that was a fucked up dream that I was trying to bone my friend's sister. And I roll over and go back to sleep. RIGHT BACK WHERE I WAS. I go upstairs and she's lying in the living room in nothing but a blanket. We talk about something or other and she rolls onto her back and pulls the blanket off herself. Sexy times happen. Vivid sexy times. Vivid lengthy sexy times. I wake up.

Fuck. That was weird.

Of course the first thing I do is pop onto here and write it out before I forget.

Mar 18, 2015#278

fade

Last night I dreamed I was in pursuit of an elusive animal: the titweasel. That's right. The titweasel. It's a weasel with human breasts. Specifically it is bald on the chest region with full, Caucasian boobs. There was even a titweasel society complete with a cartoon mascot.

Interesting. Urban dictionary has an entry for titweasel.

Mar 18, 2015#279

Yoshimickster

It was a snowy day, a truck with a screen attached appeared in front of my house. Out came two people, one a delivery man, the other Blake Anderson from Workaholics. He told me he released a new game, the footage of which was shown on the truck's screen. The gameplay just looked like Mario hitting one block in different backgrounds. I then asked if the game was a prank of some kind. He then left angrily, as the delivery man told me it was a "Comedy based game". The screen then showed that after playing the game, you could get your pick of action figure, all of them red and robotic. Time passed, and the truck left. I thought of going after it, but it was snowy and I didn't want to go out.

Mar 18, 2015#280

phil

So an alien essentially wiped out human civilization and in a distant future humans were kept in preserves by our insect overlords. The insect overlords were cool though. The main thing that sucked is that we were having an inner conflict with the new race of humans that was emerging. There were some particularly gruesome public executions but I can't remember who was killing whom.

Mar 18, 2015#281

drifter

fade said:
Last night I dreamed I was in pursuit of an elusive animal: the titweasel. That's right. The titweasel. It's a weasel with human breasts. Specifically it is bald on the chest region with full, Caucasian boobs. There was even a titweasel society complete with a cartoon mascot.

Go on.

Apr 5, 2015#282

ThatNickGuy

https://nickpiers.wordpress.com/2015/04/05/my-flying-dream/

Had another re-occurring flying dream. I wish I had these more often, because I love waking up to them.

Apr 13, 2015#283

GasBandit

I dreamed I was playing a new MMO (which looked suspiciously like a 3rd person version of original Everquest), and then all of a sudden somebody in game /shouted "Fuck you, GasBandit, and your clownclothes brothel!" And I'm all, "what the hell?" And then I look at the house I own in game and the NPCs that live and work there (butler, merchant, etc) apparently started a brothel in a back room when I wasn't looking. But they only allowed other NPCs to patronize it, and I guess that's what pissed off the guy who shouted.

And just as an aside, I had never before heard the word "clownclothes" used as an epithet, or even an adjective, or really in any way at all. Usually when referring to what clowns wear, I'd have said "clown costume." I guess my brain wanted to say "clownshoes" but got overly creative.

Apr 13, 2015#284

Bowielee

I think we should make "clownclothes" a thing.

Apr 18, 2015#285

sixpackshaker

Three terrible men were on a cross country trip. The are terrible in the sense that everyone on Seinfeld is terrible, self-absorbed, needy, and they were also cowards. They were responsible for traveling with a small boy 8-12 years old. He too was terrible, but cruel, violent, and he was a thief. Every time they stopped the kid stole something, or hit and bullied on of the men. Most of the comedy of the dream came from the three men trying to ditch the evil kid, that all the by-standers just saw as three men shirking their responsibilities to a young, innocent child.

When they finally make their break the kid chased them down in a muscle car that he had just stolen. Then they start driving down into a lush canyon, and the sound track starts... It was a gospel song sung in multiple verses by: Elvis, The Clash, James Brown, Patti La Belle. It seemed like it was written and also preformed by Bob Dylan and Ray Wylie Hubbard.

Then suddenly I am driving the car down that green canyon. I am going through some caves and come out on a suspension bridge that looks to be a mile long, two lanes, a wooden deck, with a flood in the canyon that comes up close to the bottom of the bridge. Once I got half way across the flood waters cover the bridge by a foot. I drove through some shallower water on the bridge, but when it got deeper I crossed onto the opposite lane. Of course there was on coming traffic each time I got into the other lane.

When I came out of the cave on the other side, I was at some tent festival where the band above was just wrapping up the song that was playing... the end.

Apr 18, 2015#286

Null

That sounds pretty cool.

May 4, 2015#287

Frank

I had a dream last night after hanging out with some married friends who are expecting a child that I was in a bubbly bathtub, spooning her and trying to talk her out of cheating on her husband with me until we both decided that a BJ wasn't cheating. She was VERY pregnant in the dream.

Dr. Freud, WHAT THE FUCK?

May 4, 2015#288

WasabiPoptart

My take is that it sounds like you had a good time hanging out with your friends, you got to relax, and maybe you feel comfortable talking to his wife about subjects that you normally would keep to yourself (or you could see her being a confidant in the future).

Or maybe you just want to bone her once she's further along. j/k

May 4, 2015#289

PatrThom

Frank said:
I had a dream last night after hanging out with some married friends who are expecting a child that I was in a bubbly bathtub, spooning her and trying to talk her out of cheating on her husband with me until we both decided that a BJ wasn't cheating. She was VERY pregnant in the dream.

Dr. Freud, WHAT THE FUCK?

At first hurried glance, I thought it said "Dr. Dre," and I was imagining a very different scenario.

--Patrick

May 7, 2015#290

@Li3n

Frank said:
I had a dream last night after hanging out with some married friends who are expecting a child that I was in a bubbly bathtub, spooning her and trying to talk her out of cheating on her husband with me until we both decided that a BJ wasn't cheating. She was VERY pregnant in the dream.

Dr. Freud, WHAT THE FUCK?

Well im sure Freud would just explain to you that you're actually their time displaced baby, and you're just experiencing normal Oedipal feelings...

Also, the bathtub is clearly a penis...

...

Or maybe you just need to get laid... whatever.[DOUBLEPOST=1431017148,1431017112][/DOUBLEPOST]

WasabiPoptart said:
Or maybe you just want to bone her

FTFY

May 7, 2015#291

Null

PatrThom said:
At first hurried glance, I thought it said "Dr. Dre," and I was imagining a very different scenario.

--Patrick

That would have involved choking her and throwing her down stairs, I'm pretty sure.

May 9, 2015#292

GasBandit

I took a nap today after working on HFA2, and dreamed of an action MMORPG with an interesting dynamic - whatever class you were got a unique ability that was automatically shared with the group. The tank class took half damage, and anyone grouped with one also got that benefit. The wizard's shared ability was to deal double damage. The cleric's attacks would briefly stun any common enemy their own level or lower. The rogue's ability was to turn invisible when not attacking or moving. The bard regenerated health and mana. The hybrid melee/caster class would take 20% of the damage dealt as self healing. And so on. So, in addition to your normal abilities, you'd also have all the abilities listed above so long as that class was in your group (and close by). The effect was, the larger and more diverse your group, the more powerful each individual member was, by far.

May 9, 2015#293

jwhouk

With all these RPG dreams, maybe you need to go into game devo or something.

May 9, 2015#294

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
The effect was, the larger and more diverse your group, the more powerful each individual member was, by far.

Reminds me of the D2 Power Paladin Party. 8 Paladins, all with different maxed-out auras.

--Patrick

May 9, 2015#295

GasBandit

PatrThom said:
Reminds me of the D2 Power Paladin Party. 8 Paladins, all with different maxed-out auras.

--Patrick

Heh, back in the day, in DAOC, they had to nerf Paladins healing chant/aura. DAOC's group size was 8 players... put 8 Paladins in a group, they all chant heal... individually the heals were small, but together (with a cleric buffing them from outside the group) they were able to largely tackle anything because they could outheal the damage, and the healing also kept aggro on the group. So one group of paladins could basically spearhead the way through any dungeon or RvR keep with dozens of hangers-on following in their wake.

May 10, 2015#296

fade

It started with me asking some unseen force how everyone could occupy such a small point on the surface of the earth but an infinite space inside their heads. They told me we expand outward from the surface and showed me how that became the threads of the Greek fates. It was beautiful the way everyone's threads were tangled and matted. I followed some of them down to their people. Saw some break while I watched. Saw my brother's twisted with a broken cord, which made me sad.

Jun 5, 2015#297

WasabiPoptart

Noah woke me up at 4:30 because he had a nightmare. I had a hard time getting back to sleep, but when I finally did:

What I remember is that my two kids were my brother and sister in the dream. I was a teenager, maybe in my early 20s. They were the same ages they are now. A moving truck came and got Lily's stuff, but left ours. Lily told Noah that she was going to go to our new house. Noah was excited and came to tell me about it, but I knew it was a bunch of crap. So I confronted my mom about it. She told me she had to send Lily away because they couldn't pay their taxes. They told her and Noah that Lily was going to our new house so they wouldn't be upset. I was livid.

Now at this point I'm becoming lucid/aware of being asleep because I start fighting with the feeling that my mom has given my daughter away vs. my sister is going away. I began screaming at my mom for being such a callous bitch. She's giving away a child to God knows who because they can't afford the taxes! They can't just take Lily away from me! I'm ugly crying, screaming, trying to physically fight my mom, demanding to know where Lily was being sent to...

And that's when I made myself wake up. I was so shaken by the whole thing that I had to convince myself that the little body in the bedroom across the hallway was really her, really there, and that no one was going to take her.

Jun 9, 2015#298

GasBandit

Last night I had a dream that parasitic worms were crawling around just under the skin on my feet. It was very disturbing. I even tried pulling them out with tweezers, but I could never get one more than halfway out before it would wriggle its way back inside. I woke up feeling like I needed to go to the doctor and just ask for a broad spectrum parasite detection lab or something.

Jun 9, 2015#299

PatrThom

Tell me...did you ever see "White Dwarf?"

--Patrick

Jun 9, 2015#300

Null

GasBandit said:
Last night I had a dream that parasitic worms were crawling around just under the skin on my feet. It was very disturbing. I even tried pulling them out with tweezers, but I could never get one more than halfway out before it would wriggle its way back inside. I woke up feeling like I needed to go to the doctor and just ask for a broad spectrum parasite detection lab or something.

Oh god. I've had dreams like that, except they're all through my body, and when they poked their heads out, basically my limbs were just coated in a mixture of blood and pus.

Jun 9, 2015#301

fade

I had a dream that someone was banging on my front door in the middle of the night. I went to see who it was, and I saw children through the peephole. They were shouting, "Let us in! Let us in!" So I started to open the door, and then I got a chill and thought better of it. The door was already partly open and I had to fight against these kids who were incredibly strong. They were all pushing with both hands, saying "Let us in! Let us in!" almost like a chant. Then I woke up. The weird thing is that my cats were both nosing around the front door.

Jun 9, 2015#302

GasBandit

fade said:
I had a dream that someone was banging on my front door in the middle of the night. I went to see who it was, and I saw children through the peephole. They were shouting, "Let us in! Let us in!" So I started to open the door, and then I got a chill and thought better of it. The door was already partly open and I had to fight against these kids who were incredibly strong. They were all pushing with both hands, saying "Let us in! Let us in!" almost like a chant. Then I woke up. The weird thing is that my cats were both nosing around the front door.

That's just a few green right-brackets away from creepypasta right there.

Jun 10, 2015#303

fade

I had a dream that I had to kill someone in order to be accepted into some mysterious organization. They assured me he was bad, and showed me evidence. But when I got there, he was just some homeless wino. I couldn't do it, so I just hid him. I told the group I did it, and they called the police, and told me the real test was to avoid capture. They gave me a bluetooth headset that connected me to an adviser. I avoided the cops through the night, but when day came, I was exposed. The adviser told me to stop looking laterally, and look vertically. So I looked down and saw a manhole cover. I opened it and went down, and was surprised to see a clean lit white room full of heavy metal doors.

I tried some of the doors, and most were locked. But one led to a stairwell heading down. I started to walk down, and then looked over the banister, noting that the stairs went down quite some way. I went down and eventually came to a natural cavern with a crack in one wall. I looked through the crack and saw a huge open space lit with an artificial sun. It was almost like I was up on a hillside looking down, because the floor was covered with lush green vegetation, and there were people milling about. Nearby, a man in a hard hat, glasses, and a white shirt and tie spotted me and yelled an alarm. I ran back up. Later, I learned that superheros were all escapees from this underground lab. It gets fuzzy after that. Wish I could remember more.

Jun 20, 2015#304

GasBandit

Aw man, I dreamed of the most epic and engrossing MMO ever, for which I gladly shelled out both full price and a $15/mo subscription fee.

And now I woke up and can barely remember any of it.

Jun 22, 2015#305

Null

I had a dream the other night that was good, but so incredibly arrogant and unlikely I can't really share it without sounding like a complete asshole.

Jun 22, 2015#306

sixpackshaker

I had a dream where I was The Doctor. It was the opposite of the Family of Blood episodes. I went to the 80's to rescue a lost companion, who was for some reason stuck in a dilapidated urban school.

Jun 22, 2015#307

Tinwhistler

fade said:
I had a dream that someone was banging on my front door in the middle of the night. I went to see who it was, and I saw children through the peephole. They were shouting, "Let us in! Let us in!" So I started to open the door, and then I got a chill and thought better of it. The door was already partly open and I had to fight against these kids who were incredibly strong. They were all pushing with both hands, saying "Let us in! Let us in!" almost like a chant. Then I woke up. The weird thing is that my cats were both nosing around the front door.

I once had a dream where a fairy wanted me to come live in fairyland with him. When he talked to me, I felt like I was under some kind of glamour, and couldn't think of anything other than saying yes.

But before I said yes, I woke up to my little brother's cat sitting on my chest with his nose touching mine, hissing.

It was a bit disturbing.

Jun 22, 2015#308

GasBandit

Tinwhistler said:
I once had a dream where a fairy wanted me to come live in fairyland with him. When he talked to me, I felt like I was under some kind of glamour, and couldn't think of anything other than saying yes.

But before I said yes, I woke up to my little brother's cat sitting on my chest with his nose touching mine, hissing.

It was a bit disturbing.

That's some Cat's Eye level shit right there.

Jun 22, 2015#309

Tinwhistler

Maybe I should watch it so I get the reference

Jun 22, 2015#310

GasBandit

Tinwhistler said:
Maybe I should watch it so I get the reference

I haven't seen it since I was a kid in the 80s, but 6 year old me thought it pretty nifty.

TIL Frank Welker did the voice work for the cat and the troll.

Jun 22, 2015#311

PatrThom

I've seen Cat's Eye.
...and of course Frank did the animal noises.

--Patrick

Jul 2, 2015#312

fade

I had a dream about clown porn. The male clown took off his clown suit and underneath was an all white clown suit with multicolored chest hair. Then, from his crotch, a long balloon inflated while he stood hands on hips. He tied balls in the end. The female clown made a disappointed face so the male thought for a second, made the aha face. He took off his giant shoes and replaced them with even bigger ones, and the balloon got bigger.

I woke myself up laughing then, but I'll bet if it continued, the female clown's boobs would have honked like a bike horn. And nine months later she would've given birth to 27 full grown, fully clothed little person clowns, tipping their hats to the doctor clown. Then when it was time to cut the cord, the doc would just keep pulling and pulling the cord, which would be made of multicolored handkerchiefs.

Jul 2, 2015#313

Emrys

Bartender, I'll have whatever fade is having. Make it a double.

Jul 2, 2015#313

PatrThom

fade said:
I had a dream about clown porn. The male clown took off his clown suit and underneath was an all white clown suit with multicolored chest hair. Then, from his crotch, a long balloon inflated while he stood hands on hips. He tied balls in the end. The female clown made a disappointed face so the male thought for a second, made the aha face. He took off his giant shoes and replaced them with even bigger ones, and the balloon got bigger.

I woke myself up laughing then, but I'll bet if it continued, the female clown's boobs would have honked like a bike horn. And nine months later she would've given birth to 27 full grown, fully clothed little person clowns, tipping their hats to the doctor clown. Then when it was time to cut the cord, the doc would just keep pulling and pulling the cord, which would be made of multicolored handkerchiefs.

This is fantastic. Straight out of Spike & Mike.

--Patrick

Jul 8, 2015#314

Null

I had a dream that after a vaguely long time of abdominal pain, I went for medical attention... and found out it was pancreatic cancer that had spread to my liver and intestines. With a second mass found in my brain (since I've been having olfactory hallucinations all day - smoke, boiled cabbage like from an egg roll, onion soup). The doctors said that since I had inadequate insurance, and a 5% chance of survival even with aggressive treatment, they weren't going to bother. Then they told me under the Christie Indigent Patient Act, my family was legally obligated to euthanize me, without painkillers.

So yeah, not going back to sleep tonight.

Jul 8, 2015#315

GasBandit

I dreamed I, along with dozens of other evacuees, was on a C-130 that was going to land at an army base I knew to be overrun by zombies. My pleading with the pilot was ignored, the plane landed, sure enough, zombies everywhere. The pilot panicked and fled on foot. I managed to get the doors closed, and with my whole 2 hours of logged flight hours in my lifetime (and in a single engine Mooney for that matter) tried to get the fat, hulking thing back into the air. I badly miscalculated how much runway I had, and didn't clear the power lines as the end of the runway. Woke up. Ouch.

Jul 8, 2015#316

fade

Gas! Wake up! We need to get out of this plane! They're coming!

Jul 8, 2015#317

GasBandit

fade said:
Gas! Wake up! We need to get out of this plane! They're coming!

Jul 8, 2015#318

fade

Why won't he wake up?! Go get someone!

Jul 8, 2015#319

GasBandit

We keep this up, we'll need our own collaborative fiction thread.

Jul 8, 2015#320

Null

GasBandit said:
We keep this up, we'll need our own Fade x GasBandit slash fiction thread.

FTFY

Jul 8, 2015#321

GasBandit

... as authored by Sandra Hill.

Jul 8, 2015#322

fade

We can write that, but first I need you to do something for me. I need you to wake up.

Jul 8, 2015#323

Null

Jul 9, 2015#324

GasBandit

And last night I dreamed that my step dad sold my car to a man in China while my backpack was still in it, and the man, who spoke perfect English, pretended not to understand me as he drove away, me trying to flag him down to get my backpack back.

Aug 5, 2015#325

GasBandit

BErt said:
This was a few nights ago but I'm still kind of freaked out about it. I dreamt that I was at home and there was a knock on my door. I opened it and it was three of my neighbors - they weren't my actual neighbors, they were just three random people that were my neighbors in this dream - and they had a warning for me. They told me that another neighbor had mentioned that he was going to kill everyone in my house. The actually terminology was "I'm going to kill them throughout the night." This happened three or four times and I can't remember anything happening between the knocks on the door, but I definitely remember answering the door several times. I eventually suspected that they weren't there to warn me, but were there to watch it happen. The last time I opened the door, a fourth man showed up. He was older. Balding, glasses, a cardigan sweater - and a knife. He said "it's time to start the show"...I slammed the door shut. He proved to be much stronger than me, and forced it open...that's when I woke up.

I got up for work. I showered and let my dog out per my normal morning routine. And that's when I realized I had left my keys in the door after coming home the previous night.

2spoopy4me, dude

Aug 5, 2015#326

fade

That's amazing. Your subconscious was trying to send your conscious mind a message I guess.

Aug 23, 2015#327

Frank

I just dreamed that I worked for Kayden Kross and Stoya at a porn studio as a graphic designer (what I originally went to college for after high school). I had to call my mom and explain to her that I wasn't becoming a porn star, I just worked for them. Also, I talked to Kayden about setting up stuff so she could Twitch stream or something.

It was the nerdiest porn dream OF ALL TIME.

Aug 23, 2015#328

GasBandit

I dreamed I still worked for the company I worked for when I was 20, and they were REALLY wondering where the hell I was.

That's better than my usual old work dreams. Sometimes I dream I walk into a best buy, where I worked in high school in Colorado, and my old manager is there and he tells me if I don't take my shift right now I'm fired... and I do it because I don't remember I'm operations director for a radio station in Texas.

Aug 23, 2015#329

fade

I dreamed I went on vacation with my family. We went to this large hole-like canyon called the Brad Pit.

Sep 21, 2015#330

Tinwhistler

I dreamed I was having some kind backyard potluck, and someone dropped their piece of cornbread. As it bounced down the deck stairs, I practically killed myself trying to save it, because it was important for world peace because I suddenly realized that all of my guests were intergalactic diplomats.

About that time, my wife woke me up, and I told her "I'm rescuing cornbread."

Sep 21, 2015#331

Denbrought

Due to sundry reasons, I only slept about 45 minutes tonight. Then I had a vivid dream of my wife getting hit by a car, dying, and the police taking me to identify the body.

This morning she almost got hit by a car, predictably.

Sep 29, 2015#332

Cajungal

Dreamed that my hissing cockroaches mated again. I got fed up, bought 5 bottles of nail polish remover, and dumped it in their tank. I'm a monster.

Oct 15, 2015#333

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed that I was in a movie theater that had been built out of a passenger airline cabin, and only half of that, so there was just an aisle and rows of 1, 2, or 3 seats. But the other guy in my row was extremely rude and insulting, so I punched him in the face. Everybody thanked me. Then I tried to gift wrap a folded comforter. It went about as well as you might expect.

Oct 16, 2015#334

Squidleybits

I dreamed that someone broke into our garage and stole the recycling that we had been saving for the school bottle drive. Seriously? The one dream I remember recently and that's it? No Thor? No Usher?

The weird part is that I woke up totally convinced that I was hearing an alarm ... @HCGLNS even checked for me!

Oct 30, 2015#335

fade

I had a dream that I invented and successfully marketed cleavage charms. They were little things you put in your cleavage while wearing a low cut shirt, and they ranged all over the place in style. Since I started the campaign on Halloween, the first one was a gargoyle who was designed to look like he was being compressed between the breasts, with his hands out and a funny little oof face. The whole dream was all 80s business success movie style. Montage, obligatory magazine cover.

Oct 30, 2015#336

Tinwhistler

fade said:
I had a dream that I invented and successfully marketed cleavage charms. They were little things you put in your cleavage while wearing a low cut shirt, and they ranged all over the place in style. Since I started the campaign on Halloween, the first one was a gargoyle who was designed to look like he was being compressed between the breasts, with his hands out and a funny little oof face. The whole dream was all 80s business success movie style. Montage, obligatory magazine cover.

You know, that would probably sell. Got any sculpting ability?

Oct 30, 2015#337

Dave

And it gives us the excuse to be able to look at cleavage without the target or my wife getting mad!

Oct 31, 2015#338

jwhouk

This is going to sound strange, but my dream last night was like I was in a James Bond movie.

And yes, it was Daniel Craig as Bond.

Oct 31, 2015#339

Bubble181

jwhouk said:
This is going to sound strange, but my dream last night was like I was in a James Bond movie.

And yes, it was Daniel Craig as Bond.

And you were...? The Bond girl? The villain? Q? Innocent Bystander #21546?

Oct 31, 2015#340

Null

Bubble181 said:
And you were...? The Bond girl? The villain? Q? Innocent Bystander #21546?

I'm betting Bond Girl.

Nov 1, 2015#341

jwhouk

It was weird because It was just like watching a movie - no self-insertion.

Dec 3, 2015#342

GasBandit

I had the ~~wierdest~~ weirdest dream last night that I don't remember most of, however, it did involve slashing someone's throat with a blade fabricated by compressing a banana to diamond hardness.

Dec 11, 2015#343

fade

I had a dream that I invented a game that consisted of a piece of burlap stretched over an upright frame (like Connect Four) full of holes of varying shapes and sizes. You had to string knotted strips of bamboo through the holes to win. I got Snoop Dog to endorse it, and I called it Hitches and Holes. Which was hilarious in the dream, but kind of dumb now that I type it out.

Dec 23, 2015#344

Dei

My husband is getting a vasectomy in an hour, and every dream I can remember from last night is me trying to talk him out of it. I really don't want to go back to having completely dependant children again, but my biological clock so does not agree. The 5 billion baby pictures my cousins keep posting is also killing me.

Dec 23, 2015#345

Bowielee

Dei said:
My husband is getting a vasectomy in an hour, and every dream I can remember from last night is me trying to talk him out of it. I really don't want to go back to having completely dependant children again, but my biological clock so does not agree. The 5 billion baby pictures my cousins keep posting is also killing me.

I feel really bad for one of my friends. She was married to a real piece of shit, so after 2 kids she decided that she wanted to get her tubes cauterized so she can't have any more kinds with that dick. She finally divorced him and ended up with a guy that she really loves and is good to her who wants kids of his own, and now she can't have any. She could have it reversed, but it would cost a small fortune.

Dec 23, 2015#346

PatrThom

Bowielee said:
it would cost a small fortune.

More than in vitro?

--Patrick

Dec 29, 2015#347

fade

I was standing on the lawn of my parents' house at night, and all I knew was that I was terrified. Gibs and chunks of bodies started falling in random bits from the sky, which had a full moon and some clouds. I looked up, but couldn't see where they were coming from. I just knew there was something there after everyone. There was this skinny, hag-like old lady standing in a deep puddle in the driveway, too, and she was laughing and saying, "He'll get ya, boy!" Then I saw him--he looked like the silhouette of a giant little boy, flying gingerbread man style, with glowing blue-white eyes. He made a terrible cross between a screech and a scream that just ripped across the entire landscape. I knew he saw me, and so, I did the only thing I could think of. I grabbed the old lady around the neck, and she stopped laughing and got scared. I just kept shouting, "Let me go, or I let go of your mother!", implying I was ready to kill her to make my escape. I ran and hid in the trees with her, while his shadow kept passing over. Then I woke up.

Dec 29, 2015#348

GasBandit

Couple nights ago I dreamed I was visiting my parents. Apparently they had some kind of insect problem, because my stepmother had decided the best way to deal with it was to let loose hundreds of tarantulas in the house. On every surface, every piece of furniture - walls, floors, couches, chairs, tables, ceiling, TV, kitchen, all of it... big hairy spiders all over everything. Not doing anything aggressive or anything, but I just turned around and said "I'll be staying at a hotel. Call me when you want to go get something to eat... at a restaurant!"

Dec 29, 2015#349

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
Couple nights ago I dreamed I was visiting my parents. Apparently they had some kind of insect problem, because my stepmother had decided the best way to deal with it was to let loose hundreds of tarantulas in the house. On every surface, every piece of furniture - walls, floors, couches, chairs, tables, ceiling, TV, kitchen, all of it... big hairy spiders all over everything. Not doing anything aggressive or anything, but I just turned around and said "I'll be staying at a hotel. Call me when you want to go get something to eat... at a restaurant!"

Might want to check your pillow.

--Patrick

Dec 29, 2015#350

Dei

Dec 30, 2015#351

fade

Last night I had a dream that my kids and I were playing a VR version of The Sims. We discovered that the babies in the simulation had a set "happy" reaction no matter what you did. So we found it hilarious to kick them around and bounce them off walls. It was so funny, I woke myself up laughing in real life.

Dec 31, 2015#352

PatrThom

Dei said:

Spiders aren't Nope. This is distilled Nope.

--Patrick

Jan 1, 2016#353

ThatNickGuy

This was definitely the weirdest dream I've had in awhile. Especially since I rarely remember my dreams these days. This one was pretty vivid.

I was working for a mob boss. No idea what I did because it wAll the other guys that worked for the big guy played cards. And since it was hanging out, I was allowed to play pool and such. Basically keep myself entertained until I was needed. Except I kept screwing up and using tables specifically set up for the boss. All the other tables were filled, except for his. And I'd move from one table to another, only to be yelled at by one of the other guys that it was Mr. Big's table. They didn't call him Mr. Big in the dream; it's just an easier way to refer to him.

Where I really fucked up was playing pool and having a good time with a pair of girls that were there. Joking, laughing, showing them how to play. Totally harmless. Apparently, I wasn't supposed to hang out with the hired help - prostitutes, in other words.

That's when Mr. Big himself got involved. He insisted that they weren't people and we shouldn't treat them like that. They were just there to be used and abused. He demonstrated this by making them walk around naked or telling them to make out with each other. The girls were new to the business and were almost as unsure about everything as I was. They were certainly empathetic that Mr. Big was putting me through this. He kept threatening that he'd make all three of us (me and the girls) have sex if I didn't start listening to him.

The dream ended where I was pleading him not to do that because I had depression and probably wouldn't be able to perform, anyway, because of the pressure.

Jan 1, 2016#354

phil

Dreamed that me and a kitten detective made a big bust and then I looked the other way when Kitten took some of the evidence money. I was so relieved when I woke up and didn't have to face the chief. Really ashamed of myself for letting Kitten go dirty so early into his career and also life I guess.

Jan 1, 2016#355

fade

They gunned down Puppy Detective 2 days before retirement.

Feb 14, 2016#356

Enresshou

Just in time for the Michigander Halforums meet up, I had a dream the night before that Dave had a long-lost brother from Kazakhstan that had reconnected with him through the forum. Apparently this had been a "thing" for a while so I was EXTREMELY confused at a) the new face with a massive post count and b) wondering how the hell I had missed all this when it was occurring.

Mar 22, 2016#357

fade

I had a dream that we moved into this new house I'm buying, and we found out it was huge inside but dated. The previous owners had left a lot of valuable things like furniture. Especially in what appeared to be a little boy's room. There was a TV and some (albeit older) video games, etc. Anyway, we're trying to figure out why they left all this stuff. Then the boy who used to have the room pops up at the window and pushes it open from outside. He plops himself down on the bed and starts playing with the toys. Apparently, the old owners had only moved down the street. Anyway, he's playing happily and talking to us. Then, his happy expression falls, and he looks at me and says, "Have you heard the voices yet?"

What follows gets jumbled and difficult to remember, but I do recall the house being dark, and unusually cool inside, and there being strange creaks and bangs just out of view in the dark.

Mar 22, 2016#358

Emrys

fade said:
I had a dream that we moved into this new house I'm buying, and we found out it was huge inside but dated. The previous owners had left a lot of valuable things like furniture. Especially in what appeared to be a little boy's room. There was a TV and some (albeit older) video games, etc. Anyway, we're trying to figure out why they left all this stuff. Then the boy who used to have the room pops up at the window and pushes it open from outside. He plops himself down on the bed and starts playing with the toys. Apparently, the old owners had only moved down the street. Anyway, he's playing happily and talking to us. Then, his happy expression falls, and he looks at me and says, "Have you heard the voices yet?"

What follows gets jumbled and difficult to remember, but I do recall the house being dark, and unusually cool inside, and there being strange creaks and bangs just out of view in the dark.

And?!

Mar 22, 2016#359

Squidleybits

I'm really impressed by how much detail everyone here remembers their dreams in!

Mar 27, 2016#360

PatrThom

That's because we only post the ones we remember.

--Patrick

Apr 1, 2016#361

Cajungal

I had a dream that the end of 30 Rock was an episode where Jack created a clone of Liz Lemon that he could continue to mentor.

Apr 2, 2016#362

Terrik

I had multiple weird dreams that all sort of bled into each other.

I don't exactly remember what order they were in, but they included the foll0wing:

I was at the mall and went to a Verizon kiosk because I had been calling calls from them claiming I was eligible for a free phone upgrade (and actually, they have been recently). To my complete surprise, I was eligible. I asked if my bill would change or if I'd be charged anything and they nope, here's your new Galaxy S7. The only caveat was that it was the display model, but I was sufficiently impressed anyhow. The weirdest part was I had one of those 'lucid dream' moments where I reminded myself that when I woke up in the morning, I should go to a verizon store and see if this is actually true.

Another dream I had involved a Bernie Sanders rally. As he was giving his speech, Hillary Clinton came in, said something trollish that I can't remember, and ran into a helicopter and flew away.

Thus begins the helicopter adventures.

Because in the next part of my dream, I was in some sort of holding area, which was a vast, open underground area that was filled with stone walkways and water, where I wasn't a prisoner, but I was trying to get others out. After freeing them, we hijacked a helicopter to get out, and I was flying. As we flew out of the underground complex, we get hit by a lot of Anti-aircraft fire and were shot down. At this point, this is where my brain decided the enemies were ISIS fighters, and when another helicopter came in to finish us off, it apparently got so low, one of the members of my little group was able to jump on, and throw the pilots out and land the helicopter. It turns out the helicopter was quite spacious, had multiple seats and was pretty well armed. We fixed it up a bit, repainted the insignia to something else, and got in, where this time, I did NOT fly. I suppose getting us shot down once was enough.

From there, we flew to Germany for some reason---some of the members of this group we rescued were part of this elite puppet comedy troupe who had a performance to get to (also, one of them was British). Their major catchphrase in their skits was "Butt kiss". It was uproariously funny. I guess. After a few scenes of the skit flashed by in my head, we got back in the helicopter, and flew away again, to who knows where.

While sitting a seat, the british member of the group started showing me all the gifts and money he had received from fans had given him from the Germany performance. I remember thinking, "And I have HOW much student debt?". As we were taking, another person noted there were some weird cabinets in front of the first row seats. So we go over and look and it appeared to be a little shop!....like a little skymall with all sorts of llittle touristy trinkets. Not only that, there were pictures inside the back wall of the cabinet of a Chinese man and his family, so I guess either this use to be a Chinese helicopter that was also an airline or...or...I don't know. But I ended up looking through the multiple cabinets and finding all sorts of things. I even found the guy's extra business suits. After I rooted through all this stuff, I sat back down and looked out the helicopter window and everything slowly faded away as I woke up.

Weird.

Apr 2, 2016#363

GasBandit

I just had some crazy awesome dream where I was the Dovahkiin but somehow I travelled in time/space/dimensions to earth's future and into the matrix where I beat Agent Smith to the punch and took the eyes of the oracle for myself. Then there was some kind of superhero battle royale.

I wish I could remember more but I got jolted out of the dream by being awoken by loud child-cousins.

Apr 13, 2016#364

GasBandit

I just remembered that last night I dreamed I had taken a sick day out, and when I came back in I realized the day that was out was the launch day of some video game I'd been wanting to play, and everybody at work thought I had played hooky to play it all day, but I had really been out sick. Then when I left to go to lunch I got hit by a garbage truck. And that's when I woke up.

That part where I dreamed I was sick makes me uneasy because, as I mentioned in the whine thread earlier today, I think I might be getting sick.

Apr 13, 2016#365

PatrThom

I'd be more worried about the track record of your local waste management service.

--Patrick

Jun 18, 2016#366

GasBandit

Oh man, I overslept. First time in a great while, years probably, that I've slept till noon. I must have needed it. And I had this intense dream.

I dreamed I was working on-location producing a TV series that was kind of like Game of Thrones meets ancient Greek myth, but during the course of that work I discovered my true hidden talent - I could play any guitar-like instrument, intuitively and instinctively, while riding a bicycle. I discovered this somehow with the use of a shamisen.

So I held an impromptu concert in the parking lot of an abandoned megastore just off the interstate, and thousands of people came to watch me ride in a circle on a bicycle while shredding sick metal riffs on an electric ukelele.

At one point some notable metalhead celebrity whose name I can't recall because I think my subconscious made him up appeared in a limo and amped up the crowd.

The Chipotle next door to the parking lot complained about the noise.

And then I woke up.

Jun 18, 2016#367

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
Oh man, I overslept. First time in a great while, years probably, that I've slept till noon. I must have needed it. And I had this intense dream.

I dreamed I was working on-location producing a TV series that was kind of like Game of Thrones meets ancient Greek myth, but during the course of that work I discovered my true hidden talent - I could play any guitar-like instrument, intuitively and instinctively, while riding a bicycle. I discovered this somehow with the use of a shamisen.

So I held an impromptu concert in the parking lot of an abandoned megastore just off the interstate, and thousands of people came to watch me ride in a circle on a bicycle while shredding sick metal riffs on an electric ukelele.

At one point some notable metalhead celebrity whose name I can't recall because I think my subconscious made him up appeared in a limo and amped up the crowd.

The Chipotle next door to the parking lot complained about the noise.

And then I woke up.

If it's anything like the ones I've had, the music you play is incredibly awesome, but then when you wake up, you can't remember any of it. At all. Even just to hum it. Which is frustrating.

--Patrick

Jun 19, 2016#368

sixpackshaker

I had a dream that I was visiting my parents. I go into the formal dining room and there is Brock Sampson playing Diablo on my laptop that I purchased 15 years ago...

Jun 21, 2016#369

GasBandit

I dreamed I won an inexpensive car stereo in a raffle, which I was happy about because my current car stereo is in the process of dying. I was mildly disappointed to wake up and find out I had not, in fact, won a 60 dollar car stereo (which I could easily just go buy).

Jun 21, 2016#370

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
I dreamed I won an inexpensive car stereo in a raffle, which I was happy about because my current car stereo is in the process of dying. I was mildly disappointed to wake up and find out I had not, in fact, won a 60 dollar car stereo (which I could easily just go buy).

Next time you dream it, make sure you dream that the installation is free, and not billed at $50/hr along with having to buy a $99 wiring harness.

--Patrick

Jun 26, 2016#371

ThatNickGuy

I'm thinking of turning this one into a short story.

Sometimes You Have to Shoot the Last Hostage

It was in a house. I’ve already forgotten most of it, but I remember it was in a house – a big house. And I was there with several friends. It was some kind of party or get together.

And then we were raided or attacked by a group of gunmen who took us hostage. The leader – played by Ryan Reynolds – said at the very beginning, “Don’t fight us and you’ll all live through this. But sometimes, you have to shoot the last hostage.”

Soon, the police surrounded the place. During negotiations, they agreed to release a hostage one by one. During this whole time, I was talking with my friend K, who was actually playing wingman for me with a girl who was flirting with me a little. Near the end of it, she finally got mad that I’d been talking with K the whole time and not her. She knew that we were talking about her and that all she wanted was for me to talk to her because she was interested, too.

Then, in the dream, I woke up in the house to find it mostly abandoned except for some of the hostage takers, including their leader. I started following him around the house, afraid to ask any questions. Finally, he said, “You seem to have something on your mind. What’s up?” I told him, “Sometimes you have to shoot the last hostage, right? I’m afraid to die.”

He sat there for a moment, with his crew. I think they were patching up a wound. I somehow slept through gunfire. Finally he said to me, “Go on, then. Go see her.”

And that’s when I woke up.

Jul 1, 2016#372

Frank

I just dreamed that I was a kid who was stealing Transformers from a toy store. The owner killed himself over it. His son then stabbed me in the ribs.

I was taken to the hospital where I learned I had the voice of God powers, so me and Gloria from Orange is the New Black decided that I should use it to rip people off. So I decided to steal more Transformers and I made the owner's son stab himself in the head when he came running at me with a knife.

Dreams yo.

Jul 1, 2016#373

Null

About two weeks ago I dreamt that my uncle, who has some property up in the Poconos and some earthmovers and what not to work on it, found something while he was digging a trench for a new septic system. He described it as being like an old gun and bayonet of some kind, and he wanted me and my dad to take a look. So we drove up there, and got to the edge of the hole, while my uncle had the digger running to keep the hole from filling in, supposedly. My dad said, "Look down in there, can you see it?" I looked and said, "No-" and that's when my dad hit me in the back of the head with a shovel, then kicked me into the hole. I managed to get onto my back and was looking up when my uncle started pushing the mound of earth back into the hole.

Jul 1, 2016#374

GasBandit

Null said:
About two weeks ago I dreamt that my uncle, who has some property up in the Poconos and some earthmovers and what not to work on it, found something while he was digging a trench for a new septic system. He described it as being like an old gun and bayonet of some kind, and he wanted me and my dad to take a look. So we drove up there, and got to the edge of the hole, while my uncle had the digger running to keep the hole from filling in, supposedly. My dad said, "Look down in there, can you see it?" I looked and said, "No-" and that's when my dad hit me in the back of the head with a shovel, then kicked me into the hole. I managed to get onto my back and was looking up when my uncle started pushing the mound of earth back into the hole.

Jul 1, 2016#375

Null

GasBandit said:

yup

Jul 20, 2016#376

sixpackshaker

I was in a real hurry. As I was pulling up to a stop light, the car in front suddenly stopped short, causing me to rear end their car. My passenger that I did not recognize prompted me to flee, and that he would take care of "it." He basically influence peddled his way through the passengers of the other car. -must reference the white privileged that I enjoy daily.

I finally extricate myself from the car, I grab a shopping bag that should have a change of clothes in it, and I go into hiding.

The rest of the dream just dealt with the bag being full of literal shit.

Aug 7, 2016#377

GasBandit

Last night, I dreamed that, while I was at work each day, @HCGLNS would break into my house and steal a component from my computer. One day it'd be the video card, the next a hard drive, and so on. Finally when there was nothing left but the motherboard and the case, he just beat the shit out of the whole thing until it was warped, bent, and broken, and left it out on the curb.

So I went to canada to confront him. I went to his house. Squidleybits was very nice but the hobo was completely unrepentant, so I dropped trou and took a dump on the floor.

I woke up and was ever so briefly terrified that the dream might have made me shit the bed for real, but fortunately it did not.

Aug 7, 2016#378

HCGLNS

GasBandit said:
Last night, I dreamed that, while I was at work each day, @HCGLNS would break into my house and steal a component from my computer. One day it'd be the video card, the next a hard drive, and so on. Finally when there was nothing left but the motherboard and the case, he just beat the shit out of the whole thing until it was warped, bent, and broken, and left it out on the curb.

So I went to canada to confront him. I went to his house. Squidleybits was very nice but the hobo was completely unrepentant, so I dropped trou and took a dump on the floor.

I woke up and was ever so briefly terrified that the dream might have made me shit the bed for real, but fortunately it did not.

Like you would get past the picket defense of jogging redheads in yogi pants in my neighborhood.

Aug 7, 2016#379

Frank

I dreamed that my ex was going around kissing people I knew and then asking me if it bothered me.

It took me half an hour after waking up to shake the feelings the dream left me with. Fuck you brain.

Aug 23, 2016#380

Cog

It's been a while since I dreamed the solution to a coding problem.

Aug 23, 2016#381

HCGLNS

Last night I dreamed that an article was written about my time travelling abilities and published in my favourite magazine. I then went on a rampage because it contained pictures of me.

Aug 26, 2016#382

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed it was the last day of high school, and everyone was getting their stuff together to leave for the last time. I was trying to talk and joke with everyone as we did, but instead of raising the mood, every joke I told seemed to make the atmosphere colder. Finally they all turned their back on me, and left without speaking. Occasionally one or another turned to throw me a final disdainful look as they went. Before long I was left in the room alone and flabbergasted.

Sep 13, 2016#383

bhamv3

Last night, just before I woke up, I said in my dream, "Sir, please stop peeing on my plunger."

I don't remember the circumstances in the dream that led to that particular sentence. Presumably there was a man urinating on my plunger, and I wanted him to stop, but I couldn't tell you who it was or why he was taking a leak on my household tools.

Sep 13, 2016#384

fade

Ah. Zee plunger is your penis.

Sep 29, 2016#385

GasBandit

Last night, I had a dream where, as dusk neared, I was trying to ride east on a motorized unicycle as quickly as possible - because if the sun set on me, vampires would pounce on me and tear me to shreds.

I feel like it might be a metaphor for work, lately.

Sep 29, 2016#386

Fun Size

So, the new year of crippling school stress is upon us, and with it has come a sudden resurgence of nightmares. While the one I had last week was disturbing but silly to recount, the one two nights ago was delightfully terrifying.

I was in bed watching a documentary about people that were found after drowning with my wife, and as it went on, I realized that the bed we were on was floating in water. At the edge of the bed, a corpse was floating next me, complete with eyeless sockets and drawn back lips exposing yellowed teeth. I was trying to find something to use to push it away when I realized one of its hands was resting on the bed, and I could hear the fingers scratching against the mattress, but I couldn't tell if it was actually moving or if it was the water rocking it back and forth. Either way, it kept getting closer and closer right until I woke up.

So yeah, fuck that scene entirely.

Oct 27, 2016#387

fade

I had this weird dream that I was God, and the dream's plot was basically a rom-com. I remember being concerned that my divine omnipotence looked like hokey special effects, and because of decades of conditioning into thinking that look meant low production values, no one would believe who I was.

Oct 27, 2016#388

HCGLNS

fade said:
I had this weird dream that I was God, and the dream's plot was basically a rom-com. I remember being concerned that my divine omnipotence looked like hokey special effects, and because of decades of conditioning into thinking that look meant low production values, no one would believe who I was.

What did Ashera look like? Salma Hayek?

Oct 27, 2016#389

Null

I had a dream that on November 9th, right wing militia assholes decided to protest Trump's resounding defeat by shooting up the college I work at "cuz that's where they turn people in them educated liberal queers". The college's lockdown plan essentially pooled most of the students in a few large common areas that weren't even remotely secured, and these guys didn't just have small arms, looking out a window I saw 4 trucks in the lot with mounted machineguns (M60, Browning .30 cal) laying down fire on anyone using the exits.

Oct 27, 2016#390

Yoshimickster

I had one where I was in a city, that was half shadow, half light, and in the middle of it was a medium sized to large hotel style building. I then go into a sort of tram style elevator that went by ceilings but could also go up and down. From what I remember of the dialogue they were filming a movie and I was watching it, and all throughout it they mention that the lion in the hotel is sick. I wake up before seeing the lion.

Oct 27, 2016#391

fade

Null said:
I had a dream that on November 9th, right wing militia assholes decided to protest Trump's resounding defeat by shooting up the college I work at "cuz that's where they turn people in them educated liberal queers". The college's lockdown plan essentially pooled most of the students in a few large common areas that weren't even remotely secured, and these guys didn't just have small arms, looking out a window I saw 4 trucks in the lot with mounted machineguns (M60, Browning .30 cal) laying down fire on anyone using the exits.

You have the gift of clairvoyance!

Oct 27, 2016#392

PatrThom

I had a dream that I broke the screen of my phone.

--Patrick

Oct 27, 2016#393

Dei

I don't remember my dream, except that part of it convinced me to turn off my alarm without actually waking up. Luckily routine kicked in and I woke up in a panic 5 minutes later.

Nov 21, 2016#394

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I went into a public restroom to take a whiz. I went into a stall, started doing my business, and then the wall in front of me just... wasn't there anymore. Instead was just an open gap looking out into a busy shopping mall, right adjacent to the inside of the entrance. People walking by, noticing me. I frowned mightily and PISSED HARDER. To assert dominance. Made eye contact with every one I could. And they started turning and running.

I am just so, SO glad that I didn't piss myself for real in my bed.

Nov 21, 2016#395

Yoshimickster

GasBandit said:
Last night I dreamed I went into a public restroom to take a whiz. I went into a stall, started doing my business, and then the wall in front of me just... wasn't there anymore. Instead was just an open gap looking out into a busy shopping mall, right adjacent to the inside of the entrance. People walking by, noticing me. I frowned mightily and PISSED HARDER. To assert dominance. Made eye contact with every one I could. And they started turning and running.

I am just so, SO glad that I didn't piss myself for real in my bed.

Yeah, pissing dreams are my sub-consciouses way of saying "HEY! Dumb ass! Y'gotta pee!"

Nov 21, 2016#396

GasBandit

Yoshimickster said:
Yeah, pissing dreams are my sub-consciouses way of saying "HEY! Dumb ass! Y'gotta pee!"

I did jolt awake, frantic to scramble for the bathroom, but it turns out I didn't really have to go. So there must have been something else at work there...

Nov 21, 2016#397

Officer_Charon

Kegel game stronk.

Dec 19, 2016#398

sixpackshaker

Set up: I have a door to by back deck, if you don't close it just right, it will pop open. I also have some neighborhood cats that hang out on my back porch, and stare at my dog.

Dream: I walk into my kitchen and see an orange tabby that does not belong to me, then I notice that it is really hot inside the house. I look to the back door and it is wide open on a summer day. So I start to shoo the cat out of the house, then I notice another cat, and another cat.... so on. I pick up a grey tabby and just as I am about to give it the heave ho, I notice it is my cat Lili.

Then the large female cat comes struggling into the back door. She is white and covered in mangy sores. She is also dragging her belly because she is extremely pregnant and is about to pop. I panic when I realize that if she has the kittens in the house, they will become citizens and I wont be able to get rid of them. I felt like a terrible person, juggling all the cats out the back door and trying to slam it shut. But my dog kept trying to play with all the cats. And each time I try to close the door he would barrel in or out of the door keeping me from closing it.

I just wonder if my subconscious is really opposed to Syrian Refugees...

Dec 19, 2016#399

fade

It's really easy to interpret most of these dreams as sex dreams.

Dec 19, 2016#400

PatrThom

Especially if you follow them all with "...in bed."

--Patrick

Dec 20, 2016#401

@Li3n

sixpackshaker said:
She is white

I just wonder if my subconscious is really opposed to Syrian Refugees...

Doesn't sound like it to me...

Dec 23, 2016#402

ThatNickGuy

Had an interesting dream last night where I met three different girls.

The first worked at Subway. This was earliest in the dream, so I don't remember as much. It related with social media. I laughed heartily at something I saw on my phone and she took a picture of me, sharing it on Twitter. The photo went viral (in a positive way). I didn't realize this until after I left, but then went back and talked to her a little bit after she was done work. We had a good laugh over it.

(I also remember getting a message from someone I didn't recognize who wanted to kick my ass because I "looked gay" in that picture. He even told me to meet him at a nearby street corner at a specific time.)

The second girl I met through one of my best friends. She wanted to meet me but knew nothing about me. I don't remember what she looked like because it was dark for some reason. She rambled about plans for a first date, saying we should get drunk and go dancing. I said, "Whoa, I'm more a relaxed 'Starbucks with a book' guy." She thought relaxed meant "smoking a bowl." Then she brought up smoking and I said, "Um, hold on. I'm sorry, but those are some major dealbreakers for me. I'm not comfortable dating someone who smokes, does drugs, or drinks or parties a lot." Suddenly, she started crying loudly about being rejected, saying I'm judgemental. My friend and I shared an "Uh...." look. He was partly mad at me for upsetting his friend, but also apologetic because he knew I'm stubborn and picky and didn't realize his friend was like this.

The last girl tapped me on the shoulder while I walked down the street. She was kind of a punky girl, with a nose piercing, black hair, and a jean jacket. I remember her the most because right after she said, "Excuse me, I think we dated before...?" I woke up. Dammit, that's a great opening line.

Dec 28, 2016#403

Bubble181

@Li3n said:
Doesn't sound like it to me...

Syrians are literally Caucasians, far more so than most people we consider as such - "Caucasian" is a bad name to use for "white". They're also fairly light skinned, in general. They're not Arabs, ethnically.

Dec 28, 2016#404

jwhouk

Weird dream - I was having a heart attack, and wasn't minding the time in the hospital at all...

Jan 24, 2017#405

GasBandit

Every so often, I dream that I just happen to walk into a place where I used to work a long time ago, like Best Buy (where I worked in high school) or Oracle (where I worked in Colorado Springs), and somebody yells at me "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? We've been waiting for you for SO long! Here's what we need you to do today..." and then I'm stuck there working for the rest of the dream, or until I remember "Hey wait, I quit/got let go from this job years ago," but that almost never happens.

Jan 24, 2017#406

Dei

GasBandit said:
Every so often, I dream that I just happen to walk into a place where I used to work a long time ago, like Best Buy (where I worked in high school) or Oracle (where I worked in Colorado Springs), and somebody yells at me "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? We've been waiting for you for SO long! Here's what we need you to do today..." and then I'm stuck there working for the rest of the dream, or until I remember "Hey wait, I quit/got let go from this job years ago," but that almost never happens.

I constantly have those same dreams, except I also always forget I'm supposed to be working but no one cares and my job is still there the next time I remember it exists.

Jan 24, 2017#407

Yoshimickster

Had two memorable dreams last night, one where I meet a fan at a con who begs me to give him a rare comic for his collection...only for him to sell it to a booth right next to me for 25 bucks, and then a book-shelf right above my bed collapsed on me, where I actually felt physical pain. Also most of the books were what I felt were continuations of Discworld. I continue to have comic book dreams, most likely due to my incessant need for completion as a collector.

Jan 25, 2017#408

fade

Another zombie dream. I was part of a nomadic group some years after the outbreak (no doubt inspired by playing Last of Us recently, which is set 20 years after the outbreak). We would form communities in old towns that were free or mostly free of the zombies. For some reason (also from the game), we were at odds with the remnant of the government, who were well-equipped. In any case, we would stay in a town until the inevitable overrun by zombies, which would be announced by unearthly screaming from the horde. Then we'd bug out and move on to another. The zombies themselves were interesting. They had a hive-like mind, and were difficult to kill. One alone was no threat. In fact, it would usually not even notice you. However, as more grouped, one would become a semi-intelligent leader. Inevitably, these groups formed and organized to overrun our towns.

After we were overrun, we found a hospital that had found a cure, but it was tightly held by the government. The doctors being doctors were keen on administering the cure to as many as possible (it couldn't help those who already turned, but it could stop an active bite), but the government wanted it under their control. The doctors gave us some, but the gov't, having working radios still, got wind and showed up. That's where I woke up unfortunately. Trying to escape between floors.

Feb 21, 2017#409

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I went to Best Buy to buy a video game (talk about retro, right?), but when I got to the front to pay, I reached down into my shopping bag, and my game had turned into a meatball sub. I look up from it, confused, to find Jon "Jontron" Jafari is working the register, and he's in full swing of his schtick, saying "lookadisguy over here, buyin' a meatball sammitch at Best Buy. DENATTADEN."

I don't remember much else except that the manager was a real tool.

I'm glad I had a dream about best buy that didn't have me working there, again... I worked there in high school, and every so often I still have a dream where I go into a Best Buy and get chewed out for being 20 years late for my shift, and then they make me work the floor.

Feb 21, 2017#410

sixpackshaker

I dreamed that I was drafted into the army. I was doing OK as a nearly 50 fat boy. Then as boot camp was winding down one of the young guys brought a couple of boxes to me. One was a nice set of Army Boots, the other was a box of teaching supplies. I was to teach geography again to these boys that were about to get sent off to war.

Teaching again scared me worse than facing combat.

Feb 21, 2017#411

Cheesy1

GasBandit said:
I'm glad I had a dream about best buy that didn't have me working there, again... I worked there in high school, and every so often I still have a dream where I go into a Best Buy and get chewed out for being 20 years late for my shift, and then they make me work the floor.

I get that reoccurring nightmare too, finding myself working at my first high school job again and I'm in trouble because I've been missing shifts due to not realizing I worked there again.

Feb 21, 2017#412

PatrThom

I detect a theme.

--Patrick

Feb 22, 2017#413

fade

I had this weird dream about rape zombies. They all wore victorian era suits, and were fully sentient/sapient. They had red irises, and spouted cheesy come-ons, and had a habit of pelvic thrusting while they walked. If they caught you and did the deed, you'd become one, too. I saw it happen. His eyes turned red, and he grew out a skeezy moustache, and started spouting pickup lines.

Feb 22, 2017#414

Emrys

fade said:
I had this weird dream about rape zombies. They all wore victorian era suits, and were fully sentient/sapient. They had red irises, and spouted cheesy come-ons, and had a habit of pelvic thrusting while they walked. If they caught you and did the deed, you'd become one, too. I saw it happen. His eyes turned red, and he grew out a skeezy moustache, and started spouting pickup lines.

Are you sure you weren't just remembering last Saturday night at the club?

Feb 22, 2017#415

Null

fade said:
I had this weird dream about rape zombies. They all wore victorian era suits, and were fully sentient/sapient. They had red irises, and spouted cheesy come-ons, and had a habit of pelvic thrusting while they walked. If they caught you and did the deed, you'd become one, too. I saw it happen. His eyes turned red, and he grew out a skeezy moustache, and started spouting pickup lines.

Sounds like Nick's Prom Night.

Feb 25, 2017#416

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I took part in a collaborative Dragonball Z fanfic writing session on imgur that got so popular it crashed their servers.

Putting aside for the moment the illogical nature of using an image hosting site for a textual endeavor, upon waking it occurred to me that crashing imgur's servers is not a particularly herculean feat.

Feb 28, 2017#417

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I had gotten drunk at a party and passed out on the couch, and then a woman also at the party had her way with me while I was unconscious (but because it was a dream, while I was "unconscious" I could still see what was going on, as if in the third person, but I couldn't do anything about it).

However, as she neared the end of the act, she stopped, complaining of pain, then went around to the other people at the party (who apparently had been oblivious of the goings-on despite it being in plain sight) complaining that the large size of my tallywhacker had hurt her.

Once I "regained consciousness," I went and played Lucioball, but instead of everybody being Lucio, it was a mixture of all Overwatch and TF2 characters on both sides.

So, yeah. Interpretations welcome.

Mar 1, 2017#418

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
So, yeah. Interpretations welcome.

You really, really miss Lúcioball.

--Patrick

Mar 1, 2017#419

GasBandit

Alright, so, last night I dreamed I came to this forum, and made a post talking about how when I was in the first grade I jumped off the roof of a garage, through the garage's attached basketball hoop, and landed in the driveway without hurting myself, all to impress a girl.

Of course, now that I am awake, I definitely know I did no such thing, but I "remembered" it clearly during the dream. Thing is, the "garage" in my dream was actually modeled after the garage on my own father's house in Colorado (right down to the basketball hoop), which he did not buy until I was almost out of Jr. High, and the girl I was impressing was a girl who was nothing more than a classmate and passing acquaintance... in the second grade... when I lived in Maryland.

At any rate, the dream did not stop there. After I made that post, I apparently decided to go revisit that garage out of nostalgia, and when I arrived I saw a policeman chasing someone around on top of the garage, shouting something about the man having a bike with an "illegal kickstand." I looked lower, and saw a bicycle at the corner of the garage, and its kickstand was mounted to the side of the rear tire - which is obviously a bad idea for a number of reasons, but not illegal per se.

Right behind that, was another bicycle I knew to belong to the policeman.

So I stole it.

The policeman quickly abandoned his pursuit of the guy on the roof to chase me, but as I had his bicycle, he stood no hope of catching me.

Then I woke up.

So... howbowdah.

Mar 1, 2017#420

Emrys

GasBandit said:
Alright, so, last night I dreamed I came to this forum, and made a post talking about how when I was in the first grade I jumped off the roof of a garage, through the garage's attached basketball hoop, and landed in the driveway without hurting myself, all to impress a girl.

Of course, now that I am awake, I definitely know I did no such thing, but I "remembered" it clearly during the dream. Thing is, the "garage" in my dream was actually modeled after the garage on my own father's house in Colorado (right down to the basketball hoop), which he did not buy until I was almost out of Jr. High, and the girl I was impressing was a girl who was nothing more than a classmate and passing acquaintance... in the second grade... when I lived in Maryland.

At any rate, the dream did not stop there. After I made that post, I apparently decided to go revisit that garage out of nostalgia, and when I arrived I saw a policeman chasing someone around on top of the garage, shouting something about the man having a bike with an "illegal kickstand." I looked lower, and saw a bicycle at the corner of the garage, and its kickstand was mounted to the side of the rear tire - which is obviously a bad idea for a number of reasons, but not illegal per se.

Right behind that, was another bicycle I knew to belong to the policeman.

So I stole it.

The policeman quickly abandoned his pursuit of the guy on the roof to chase me, but as I had his bicycle, he stood no hope of catching me.

Then I woke up.

So... howbowdah.

I think you need to either cut down on the spicy wings before bed or start a collection of short stories. You have the perfect title already.

Mar 1, 2017#421

fade

GasBandit said:
Alright, so, last night I dreamed I came to this forum, and made a post talking about how when I was in the first grade I jumped off the roof of a garage, through the garage's attached basketball hoop, and landed in the driveway without hurting myself, all to impress a girl.

Of course, now that I am awake, I definitely know I did no such thing, but I "remembered" it clearly during the dream. Thing is, the "garage" in my dream was actually modeled after the garage on my own father's house in Colorado (right down to the basketball hoop), which he did not buy until I was almost out of Jr. High, and the girl I was impressing was a girl who was nothing more than a classmate and passing acquaintance... in the second grade... when I lived in Maryland.

At any rate, the dream did not stop there. After I made that post, I apparently decided to go revisit that garage out of nostalgia, and when I arrived I saw a policeman chasing someone around on top of the garage, shouting something about the man having a bike with an "illegal kickstand." I looked lower, and saw a bicycle at the corner of the garage, and its kickstand was mounted to the side of the rear tire - which is obviously a bad idea for a number of reasons, but not illegal per se.

Right behind that, was another bicycle I knew to belong to the policeman.

So I stole it.

The policeman quickly abandoned his pursuit of the guy on the roof to chase me, but as I had his bicycle, he stood no hope of catching me.

Then I woke up.

So... howbowdah.

The only correct Freudian interpretation is that you're worried about your weird testicles, the kickstand to your bike-penis. So you pass off the cop's bike-penis as your own. Meaning you plan to pass someone else's dick-pic off as your own. But since you're on the internet, you'll get away with it.

Throwing yourself through the basketball goal with a girl nearby is clearly an attempt to "score", with the hoop (notice you focused on the hoop twice, rather than the goal as a whole) being the vagina. The fact that she's a hometown girl means you have an unexplored thing for someone either close to you or associated with some place you know.

Mar 1, 2017#422

PatrThom

You left out some kind of reference to his mother.

--Patrick

Mar 1, 2017#423

GasBandit

Emrys said:
I think you need to either cut down on the spicy wings before bed or start a collection of short stories. You have the perfect title already.

What, "Illegal Kickstand?"

fade said:
The only correct Freudian interpretation is that you're worried about your weird testicles, the kickstand to your bike-penis. So you pass off the cop's bike-penis as your own. Meaning you plan to pass someone else's dick-pic off as your own. But since you're on the internet, you'll get away with it.

Throwing yourself through the basketball goal with a girl nearby is clearly an attempt to "score", with the hoop (notice you focused on the hoop twice, rather than the goal as a whole) being the vagina. The fact that she's a hometown girl means you have an unexplored thing for someone either close to you or associated with some place you know.

I'm a bit concerned how that started off as pure nonsense and slowly worked its way to halfway plausible.

Mar 1, 2017#424

fade

GasBandit said:
I'm a bit concerned how that started off as pure nonsense and slowly worked its way to halfway plausible.

That accurately reflects my thought process.

If you wanted the plausible explanation of the first part, she's married. Or in a serious relationship. You know this is not good ("illegal"). The cop could represent a legal proceeding like a divorce, that gives you the access to "steal" this person away.

Mar 1, 2017#425

Emrys

GasBandit said:
What, "Illegal Kickstand?"

"Ask Me about my Reprehensible Filth".

Mar 13, 2017#426

GasBandit

Had a strange and unsettling dream last night.

I dreamed I had bought a house, and had moved into it for about two weeks, and was just starting to get comfortable enough with it to maybe start making some changes, change paint colors, etc, when the actual owners of the house returned from vacation. Turns out the guy I bought the house from wasn't really the owner. It was only at that point in the dream that I remembered the actual buying process, which involved lots of cash in duffel bags in exchange for a key that looked suspiciously like a copy.

At any rate, the family to whom the house belonged wasn't very sympathetic, but they tried to accommodate me by giving me a day to get my things and try to make arrangements... but then my computer wouldn't turn on and my phone wouldn't charge, so I couldn't contact anyone to arrange to move my things, or even try to track down the con man who "sold" the house to me. Then, it turns out, this family was also my cat's original owners, and my cat quickly abandoned me to return to them... then it turned out they also owned my CAR by steps of logic that only make sense when you're dreaming.

So there I am, on the sidewalk with nothing, trying to think of a way to start dealing with this crisis, when the general manager of the radio station where I work walks up and asks me "Where ya been? You coming into work today or not?!" And I reply "I think I need the day off to try to deal with this."

"But you never take a day off!" he says.

"Well, in this case, I think I need one."

Then I woke up.

And went to work.

Mar 13, 2017#427

PatrThom

Last night I got gas on the way home at 2.25/gal. It was 2.30-something the day before, so I figured that meant it would be going up soon.
Then I dreamt that I was on my way to work the following day, and it was at 1.86/gal, and I was all, "AAAAAHHHHHH!!! WHAAAT???"

--Patrick

Mar 20, 2017#428

Anonymous

I dreamed that I was playing fetch with my dog. When I tossed the retrieving buoy, it made a strange clatter, that shocked me awake...

then I saw my mouse bouncing on my desk.

Mar 21, 2017#429

GasBandit

All I remember from my dream last night is someone complimenting me on my amazingly perfect golden blonde hair.

I'm not blonde, though. My hair is definitely dark brown (with some areas going gray, admittedly).

Mar 21, 2017#430

PatrThom

That's just your PC Glorious Gaming Master Race shining through.

--Patrick

Mar 21, 2017#431

GasBandit

PatrThom said:
That's just your PC Glorious Gaming Master Race shining through.

--Patrick

Apr 7, 2017#432

fade

I dreamt I was training as a Sith. There was an academy and the tests were brutal. We were thrown out of a boat at night into tumultuous waters, and told we had to obtain a ribbon from the top of a wooden spire sticking off a half submerged wooden shipwreck. I was almost to it when a fellow classmate pulled me down. The master yelled that I had to unleash my hatred and anger on my colleague's arm before she reached the ribbon. I did and forced her arm back as she reached it, but the teacher said that it was not good enough, yelling over the storm. She said I had to focus on my colleague's elbow and tear away her arm if I truly wanted to win. So I let every aggressive feeling flow and I could feel the power as I tore her arm. Afterwards I felt sick but strong. Like the way heavy stress or too much coffee makes you. I knew I was sick because the dark side was unnatural. It was a really interesting first person experience of the Dark Side.

Apr 10, 2017#433

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed that somebody left a bottle of crystallized urine on my doorstep every night for 6 nights. The seventh night they murdered someone and left the body there instead.

Apr 10, 2017#434

Dave

I'm not a big "lucid dreamer" believer, but last night I was dreaming I was back in my old childhood home and in the dream I said, "Huh. Well, I guess I'm living here again for some reason." I woke up amused.

Oh, and that I had been leaving urine at GasBandit's house.

Apr 10, 2017#435

sixpackshaker

fade said:
I dreamt I was training as a Sith. There was an academy and the tests were brutal. We were thrown out of a boat at night into tumultuous waters, and told we had to obtain a ribbon from the top of a wooden spire sticking off a half submerged wooden shipwreck. I was almost to it when a fellow classmate pulled me down. The master yelled that I had to unleash my hatred and anger on my colleague's arm before she reached the ribbon. I did and forced her arm back as she reached it, but the teacher said that it was not good enough, yelling over the storm. She said I had to focus on my colleague's elbow and tear away her arm if I truly wanted to win. So I let every aggressive feeling flow and I could feel the power as I tore her arm. Afterwards I felt sick but strong. Like the way heavy stress or too much coffee makes you. I knew I was sick because the dark side was unnatural. It was a really interesting first person experience of the Dark Side.

Is your workplace getting competitive?

Apr 10, 2017#436

GasBandit

Dave said:
Oh, and that I had been leaving urine at GasBandit's house.

You bastard! At least it wasn't a liquid.

Apr 11, 2017#437

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
Last night I dreamed that somebody left a bottle of crystallized urine on my doorstep every night for 6 nights.

Whoever it is just wants you to get a head start on that saltpeter manufacturing against the coming apocalypse.

--Patrick

Apr 15, 2017#438

Kovac

I was awoken by a nightmare where a south african broke into my house and attacked me with broken glass.

Apr 15, 2017#439

Null

Kovac said:
I was awoken by a nightmare where a south african broke into my house and attacked me with broken glass.

I'm not sure Diplomatic Immunity covers that.

Apr 19, 2017#440

bhamv3

I dreamt I was playing Borderlands. I got a really really awesome orange drop. I think it was a legendary submachinegun that did corrosive damage, and had a stupidly large clip size, like 100+.

Before I could equip it, my wife woke me up so that I wouldn't be late for work, and I got mad at her.

May 10, 2017#441

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I was granted the title of PhD. My "Thesis" was submitted online (no defense of it was required), and it was a crappy unsourced page and a half describing the AI characteristics of the computer controlling Annie from League of Legends in co-op botmatches. It really ticked off a number of people, including some of the bona fide PhDs on this forum. And of course, I had to milk it for all it was worth, despite (or perhaps because of) my knowledge that it was, after all, a complete and utter sham.

May 10, 2017#442

sixpackshaker

GasBandit said:
Last night I dreamed I was granted the title of PhD. My "Thesis" was submitted online (no defense of it was required), and it was a crappy unsourced page and a half describing the AI characteristics of the computer controlling Annie from League of Legends in co-op botmatches. It really ticked off a number of people, including some of the bona fide PhDs on this forum. And of course, I had to milk it for all it was worth, despite (or perhaps because of) my knowledge that it was, after all, a complete and utter sham.

Do you watch Better Call Saul?

May 10, 2017#443

fade

GasBandit said:
Last night I dreamed I was granted the title of PhD. My "Thesis" was submitted online (no defense of it was required), and it was a crappy unsourced page and a half describing the AI characteristics of the computer controlling Annie from League of Legends in co-op botmatches. It really ticked off a number of people, including some of the bona fide PhDs on this forum. And of course, I had to milk it for all it was worth, despite (or perhaps because of) my knowledge that it was, after all, a complete and utter sham.

Ah, so a typical thesis first draft, then.

May 10, 2017#444

GasBandit

sixpackshaker said:
Do you watch Better Call Saul?

I don't! Does my dream run similarly?

fade said:
Ah, so a typical thesis first draft, then.

May 10, 2017#445

sixpackshaker

GasBandit said:
I don't! Does my dream run similarly?

A man with a shady law degree, and a lawyer brother that hates him for it...

May 17, 2017#446

GasBandit

For two nights in a row now I have dreamed about being back in my 10th grade english class. I can't even remember the teacher's name.

May 17, 2017#447

Null

GasBandit said:
For two nights in a row now I have dreamed about being back in my 10th grade english class. I can't even remember the teacher's name.

Mr. McDonough?

May 17, 2017#448

GasBandit

Null said:
Mr. McDonough?

No, the teacher was female...

And if that's a reference to Denis McDonough I'm not sure I understand it

May 17, 2017#449

Null

GasBandit said:
No, the teacher was female...

And if that's a reference to Denis McDonough I'm not sure I understand it

No, it was a million to one shot at guessing your teacher's name.

May 17, 2017#450

GasBandit

Null said:
No, it was a million to one shot at guessing your teacher's name.

I mean... I suppose I could dig out the yearbook and look it up... but... meh.

May 20, 2017#451

Kovac

Pretty weird dream last night.

In the dream I was pregnant - This all seemed pretty normal in the dream despite the fact that i'm a guy.
Towards the end of the dream I could even feel it kicking inside me.

And then I wake up

What the hell?

May 20, 2017#452

Cheesy1

Kovac said:
Pretty weird dream last night.

In the dream I was pregnant - This all seemed pretty normal in the dream despite the fact that i'm a guy.
Towards the end of the dream I could even feel it kicking inside me.

And then I wake up

What the hell?

Did you have to take a big poop afterwards?

May 20, 2017#453

Kovac

Nope.

May 27, 2017#454

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed a zombified Powers Boothe ate my face.

Bit it off.

Piece by piece.

Chunk by chunk.

Leaving just a skull face.

May 27, 2017#455

PatrThom

I would've believed Gary Busey, or Willem DaFoe, but Powers Boothe?

--Patrick

May 27, 2017#456

jwhouk

I had this dream last night that the Predators were in the Stanley Cup final.

...Then I woke up and realized it wasn't a dream.

Jun 1, 2017#457

fade

I had this dream that I was a soldier in WWII last night. We had set up a mine field and were watching a German tank cross it. They had some kind of tank tech that let them cross without detonating the mines. We had this weird machine that was basically a hopper about as wide as a car that had rolling wheels inside that threw out hand grenades in an arc in front of the hopper, but those were nullified by the tank as well. Then, the thing stops near us, and one German soldier gets out, and as something like a show of superiority, he walks back over to the minefield. Only outside of the tank, he sets off a mine. The gruesome part was that when the smoke cleared, he was still "standing", by which I mean his body was reduced to a few bloody strips of bone and bright red gristle that were somehow keeping him standing upright. With his last few seconds of consciousness, he kept repeating, "Ignorant, ignorant" over and over, presumably about himself.

Jun 1, 2017#458

PatrThom

Isn't that just a shot-for-shot game replay of Besieged?

--Patrick

Jun 12, 2017#459

GasBandit

Last night, I dreamed I found a strange, ornate antique pistol - or rather, it looked like it was an antique, made of wood, bound in brass with gold etchings, all that stuff... except it closely resembled a Colt 1911, magazine in the grip and everything. Also strange was that it didn't have a trigger. There wasn't even a gap for the trigger to poke out of, it was like the trigger guard was a solid piece of brass all the way around and it was never intended to have a trigger. But the gun still went off at random times for mysterious reasons.

To add another layer of confusion, I learned the gun was actually a tranquilizer dart gun. I discovered this when the gun went off by itself and I found I had accidentally shot Chris Farley in the side with a dart.

Fortunately, we were not far from my home, so I shouldered him and helped him walk there. As we approached, I saw my front door was slightly ajar. Oddly enough I wasn't concerned about a home invasion, as perhaps I should have been, instead I was more worried my cat had gotten out. But after I helped Farley through the door, I found my living room was... clean. Tidy. More well tended than it had been in years. I couldn't remember the last time my home was so spotless and orderly. So I assisted Chris to the couch to wait out the tranq, and turned around with a start to see my grandmother, dead 19 years ago, sitting in a beanbag chair I left behind in Colorado when I moved to Texas a similar amount of time in the past.

She chided me about the state in which she found my abode, then directed me to the dining table, where she took out a gigantic manila envelope - talking 18" by 11" at least, and put it on the table before me. "You didn't think I'd forget?" She asked.

And then my alarm woke me up and I'm really wondering what my past is trying to tell me.

Jun 12, 2017#460

Bubble181

GasBandit said:
Last night, I dreamed I found a strange, ornate antique pistol - or rather, it looked like it was an antique, made of wood, bound in brass with gold etchings, all that stuff... except it closely resembled a Colt 1911, magazine in the grip and everything. Also strange was that it didn't have a trigger. There wasn't even a gap for the trigger to poke out of, it was like the trigger guard was a solid piece of brass all the way around and it was never intended to have a trigger. But the gun still went off at random times for mysterious reasons.

To add another layer of confusion, I learned the gun was actually a tranquilizer dart gun. I discovered this when the gun went off by itself and I found I had accidentally shot Chris Farley in the side with a dart.

Fortunately, we were not far from my home, so I shouldered him and helped him walk there. As we approached, I saw my front door was slightly ajar. Oddly enough I wasn't concerned about a home invasion, as perhaps I should have been, instead I was more worried my cat had gotten out. But after I helped Farley through the door, I found my living room was... clean. Tidy. More well tended than it had been in years. I couldn't remember the last time my home was so spotless and orderly. So I assisted Chris to the couch to wait out the tranq, and turned around with a start to see my grandmother, dead 19 years ago, sitting in a beanbag chair I left behind in Colorado when I moved to Texas a similar amount of time in the past.

She chided me about the state in which she found my abode, then directed me to the dining table, where she took out a gigantic manila envelope - talking 18" by 11" at least, and put it on the table before me. "You didn't think I'd forget?" She asked.

And then my alarm woke me up and I'm really wondering what my past is trying to tell me.

You should check your grandma's last will to discover she's left you a treasure, in the form of old antique weaponry, that can pay for a maid for the rest of your life...But your Chris Farley-esque physique is holding you back and slows you down?

I dunno, I'm really bad at explaining dreams

Jun 12, 2017#461

fade

I would guess you feel something in your life is dangerous, but that you have no control. What's more, you've discovered you never really had control. This thing you also find antiquated despite illusions of modernity. It's prone to random failure, and you always feel the failure will be bad, but it usually plays off as a big joke.

Taking Farley home is a transition to a different concept. One that's more straightforward to interpret. Comforts of home and all that. Probably spurred by your recent visit to Colorado.

Jun 12, 2017#462

GasBandit

Bubble181 said:
You should check your grandma's last will to discover she's left you a treasure, in the form of old antique weaponry, that can pay for a maid for the rest of your life...But your Chris Farley-esque physique is holding you back and slows you down?

I dunno, I'm really bad at explaining dreams

Heh, maybe a tad too literal on the weapon, but there might be something to the rest of it. I do grow increasingly frustrated with the weight I've put on since Pauline's cancer, and I think I've spoken before about a legal battle my grandfather has ongoing, about my departed grandmother's stolen share of an oil legacy in Oklahoma. I don't know, maybe it means something and maybe it's just noise bubbling up from the ol' subconscious.

Jun 12, 2017#463

Emrys

GasBandit said:
Last night, I dreamed I found a strange, ornate antique pistol - or rather, it looked like it was an antique, made of wood, bound in brass with gold etchings, all that stuff... except it closely resembled a Colt 1911, magazine in the grip and everything. Also strange was that it didn't have a trigger. There wasn't even a gap for the trigger to poke out of, it was like the trigger guard was a solid piece of brass all the way around and it was never intended to have a trigger. But the gun still went off at random times for mysterious reasons.

To add another layer of confusion, I learned the gun was actually a tranquilizer dart gun. I discovered this when the gun went off by itself and I found I had accidentally shot Chris Farley in the side with a dart.

Fortunately, we were not far from my home, so I shouldered him and helped him walk there. As we approached, I saw my front door was slightly ajar. Oddly enough I wasn't concerned about a home invasion, as perhaps I should have been, instead I was more worried my cat had gotten out. But after I helped Farley through the door, I found my living room was... clean. Tidy. More well tended than it had been in years. I couldn't remember the last time my home was so spotless and orderly. So I assisted Chris to the couch to wait out the tranq, and turned around with a start to see my grandmother, dead 19 years ago, sitting in a beanbag chair I left behind in Colorado when I moved to Texas a similar amount of time in the past.

She chided me about the state in which she found my abode, then directed me to the dining table, where she took out a gigantic manila envelope - talking 18" by 11" at least, and put it on the table before me. "You didn't think I'd forget?" She asked.

And then my alarm woke me up and I'm really wondering what my past is trying to tell me.

You need to clean up your living room more often.

Jun 12, 2017#464

Dave

Last night I had the strangest dream. I sailed away to china in a little rowboat to find ya and you said you had to get your laundry cleaned. Didn't want no one to hold you.

What does that mean?

Jun 12, 2017#465

fade

It means you're in love with Terrik.

Jun 12, 2017#466

GasBandit

Emrys said:
You need to clean up your living room more often.

I don't need a dream to tell me that.

But I think I might need a cleaning lady.

Jun 12, 2017#467

Emrys

GasBandit said:
But I think I might need a cleaning lady.

I'll send over the doomweasels.

Jun 12, 2017#468

GasBandit

Emrys said:
I'll send over the doomweasels.

I'm pretty sure @LittleKagsin has offered to clean my place wearing no pants... can you make a similar offer?

Jun 12, 2017#469

Emrys

GasBandit said:
I'm pretty sure @LittleKagsin has offered to clean my place wearing no pants... can you make a similar offer?

I guarantee that the doomweasels will also not be wearing pants.

Jun 12, 2017#470

GasBandit

Emrys said:
I guarantee that the doomweasels will also not be wearing pants.

Somehow I knew this was coming.

Jun 12, 2017#471

Emrys

GasBandit said:
Somehow I knew this was coming.

You're a smarty every day.

How about if neither I nor the doomweasels wear pants?

Jun 12, 2017#472

LittleKagsin

GasBandit said:
I'm pretty sure @LittleKagsin has offered to clean my place wearing no pants... can you make a similar offer?

MY OFFER STILL STANDS.

Jun 12, 2017#473

GasBandit

Ladies, my mess is enough for both of you and more.

Jun 12, 2017#474

LittleKagsin

GasBandit said:
Ladies, my mess is enough for both of you and more.

Jun 12, 2017#475

Emrys

LittleKagsin said:

I'm game if you are.

Jun 12, 2017#476

LittleKagsin

Emrys said:
I'm game if you are.

Menage with me Emrys!

Jun 12, 2017#477

Tinwhistler

where's that "guys cleaning glue off the floor" gif when you need it?

Jun 12, 2017#478

Emrys

LittleKagsin said:
Menage with me Emrys!

Whoo-hoo!

Jun 12, 2017#479

GasBandit

Both of yas, COME ON DOWN!

Tinwhistler said:
where's that "guys cleaning glue off the floor" gif when you need it?

I been waiting to use this one for a while, actually -

Jun 12, 2017#480

Dave

Jun 12, 2017#481

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
[Grandma] chided me about the state in which she found my abode, then directed me to theshe took out a gigantic manila envelope - talking 18" by 11" at least, and put it on the table before me. "You didn't think I'd forget?" She asked.
And then my alarm woke me up and I'm really wondering what my past is trying to tell me.

Grandma wanted you to have a 17in MacBook Air?

LittleKagsin said:
Nettoyage with me Emrys!

FTFY

--Patrick

Jun 12, 2017#482

Gruebeard

voulez vous nettoyer avec moi ce soir :notes:

[DOUBLEPOST=1497302792,1497302745][/DOUBLEPOST]Also, this:

jwhouk said:
I had this dream last night that the Predators were in the Stanley Cup final.

...Then I woke up and realized it wasn't a dream.

It was a nightmare!

Jun 12, 2017#483

bhamv3

I dreamt it was back on my wedding day, and there we were, standing in the chapel before the pastor, and for some reason my wife was being very hesitant about saying "I do." The pastor was being very understanding about it, and he said he wouldn't rush her, and that she should only say "I do" if she really means it. So there she was, in her bridal gown and veil, visibly psyching herself up to say "I do". You know, how people roll their shoulders around, and bend their necks left and right, and sort of shift from one foot to the other. Finally, she said, "Ok, I'm ready now, here we go... I..."

And then my wife shook me awake. "Hey, get up, you're going to be late for work!"

My first thought was, "Oh hey, she said 'I do' after all!"

Jun 26, 2017#484

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I defeated @Eriol in single combat, and when he fell, his body disappeared like a video game sprite, leaving behind only a half dozen sharp fancy hairpins, which I knew I had to deliver to @Dirona.

Don't ask me, I just work here, man.

Jun 26, 2017#485

Eriol

GasBandit said:
Last night I dreamed I defeated @Eriol in single combat, and when he fell, his body disappeared like a video game sprite, leaving behind only a half dozen sharp fancy hairpins, which I knew I had to deliver to @Dirona.

Don't ask me, I just work here, man.

??? Who/what did I look like? And were you a giant can of beans when you defeated me?

Hon, you got anything?

Jun 26, 2017#486

Dirona

GasBandit said:
Last night I dreamed I defeated @Eriol in single combat, and when he fell, his body disappeared like a video game sprite, leaving behind only a half dozen sharp fancy hairpins, which I knew I had to deliver to @Dirona.

Don't ask me, I just work here, man.

Jun 26, 2017#487

fade

You're feeling subconciously threatened by Eriol's recent displays of tech knowledge, which he has been relatively quiet on in the past.

Jun 26, 2017#488

GasBandit

Eriol said:
??? Who/what did I look like? And were you a giant can of beans when you defeated me?

I... can't quite remember what you looked like. A guy. Not Batou. And no, I wasn't a can of beans

I seem to remember tracking you down through your internet connection? Except we fought between runways at an airport... very little in this dream seemed actually to have any logic to it.

Oh, and it was definitely a swordfight. Felt very "Soulcalibur"-ish.

fade said:
You're feeling subconciously threatened by Eriol's recent displays of tech knowledge, which he has been relatively quiet on in the past.

I don't think that's it.

Jun 26, 2017#489

Eriol

GasBandit said:
I... can't quite remember what you looked like. A guy. Not Batou. And no, I wasn't a can of beans

I seem to remember tracking you down through your internet connection? Except we fought between runways at an airport... very little in this dream seemed actually to have any logic to it.

So, the "big battle" scene from Civil War?

GasBandit said:
Oh, and it was definitely a swordfight. Felt very "Soulcalibur"-ish.

At least it's relatively badass. I can deal.

Jun 26, 2017#490

GasBandit

Eriol said:
So, the "big battle" scene from Civil War?

Less use of props. Also wasn't near the terminal, it was out in the field, closer to the outer fence. There was some manner of... bunker? I wanna say with a server room inside or something? Anyway, out in the grass near the ALS.

At least it's relatively badass. I can deal.

And I woke up before I finished finding Dirona to deliver your hairpins. :/

Jun 26, 2017#491

fade

Well, if it's sword fights, it's definitely penises.[DOUBLEPOST=1498496283,1498495885][/DOUBLEPOST]Am I right Freud?

Jul 10, 2017#492

Null

I went to bed early tonight.

That was apparently a mistake.

I was dreaming that I was in the bedroom of a nice apartment, with a beautiful Chinese woman. Things got pretty hot and heavy, I went down on her to completion, then we stop to catch our breath, she says she'll be right back and heads into the bathroom. I'm lying there feeling pretty pleased with things.

I don't see the knife before she plunges it in to the hilt. I no longer feel my legs and it gets hard to breath. I turn and try to ask why.

She shrugs, taking the cap off the spout of the jerry can and starts dumping a clear liquid over everything. "I'm done with you, and I hate dealing with breakups." She goes into the other room and comes back, dressed. She blows a kiss, and drops a lit match.

The rest is burning.

Jul 10, 2017#493

sixpackshaker

I had a dream recently that I was eating at a Tex-Mex Joint in a place that used to be a Bennigan's. Had a really cute Redheaded Irish Waitress, that kept asking about dishes that Bennigan's carried.

I don't know why this dream bothered me so much. Maybe it was the shitty Montecristo sandwich I had recently, and I realized I'd likely never have a Bennigan's Montecristo again.

Jul 10, 2017#494

GasBandit

Last night I dreamed I was drinking crack. Don't ask me, I don't know.

Aug 14, 2017#495

fade

I had this weird coincidence last night. I dreamed my wife and I were driving through the desert at night in a red sports car, when the stars started falling. She was frightened, but I said, "Don't worry, it's just the Perseids." See the weird thing is that I did not know the Perseids peaked this weekend. Or that we were currently passing through them at all. Wild.

The skeptic in me is pretty sure I just subconsciously saw it somewhere, but it's pretty cool.[DOUBLEPOST=1502734189,1502734138][/DOUBLEPOST]Also, I'm pretty sure the first part was a dream reference to Quantum Leap.

Aug 14, 2017#496

GasBandit

Ah, I wanted to post here a few days ago but I forgot. In the heat of the Korea discussion in the political threads, I had a dream that, for some reason, I went to North Korea with two other people. These other two people "shifted" who they were over the course of the dream, starting out being a friend of mine and his wife, then morphing through various other married couples I know, or halforumites and their spouses, and even married couples in the Rimworld playthrough :confused:

"Don't ask me, I don't know" © GasBandit

Anyway, when we got there, yeah it was a craphole like you always see with those pictures people smuggle out, but anyway we are put up in a house and the Nork government assigns us a "handler" to be our tourguide and keep us out of trouble, a stepford-smiling young Korean lady who is forever saying things like "I'm sorry, that activity is not available right now" and "It is requested you remain inside these premises for now" and such.

Me, I'm quietly scared, and in favor of just sitting in my bedroom the whole trip because what the fuck am I even doing here, I have to be out of my god damn mind.

But the married couple I'm with (and as I said, that married couple seems to change who they are every few sentences) are constantly all "Oh I'm sure it'll be fine, let's go out, let's go to a restaurant, let's go to a museum, let's go look at this statue or that landmark" etc etc etc and I'm saying "uh, I think we should listen to the nice lady and not do that. Or maybe just go home because this was a huge mistake and the grand god-emperor of all bad ideas."

I woke up after that, but man, what the hell...

Aug 18, 2017#497

WasabiPoptart

Last night I dreamed that I was at my college in class when @LittleKagsin showed up to give me a present. It had all of these pictures from my hometown on the wrapping paper. When I opened it, there was a book with a pictorial history of my hometown - which was weird since most of the pictures had my family members in them and they didn't go further back than the 1960s. I started to suspect this wasn't really Kags. When I went to find her, she was gone.

Aug 18, 2017#498

LittleKagsin

WasabiPoptart said:
Last night I dreamed that I was at my college in class when @LittleKagsin showed up to give me a present. It had all of these pictures from my hometown on the wrapping paper. When I opened it, there was a book with a pictorial history of my hometown - which was weird since most of the pictures had my family members in them and they didn't go further back than the 1960s. I started to suspect this wasn't really Kags. When I went to find her, she was gone.

Sep 9, 2017#499

sixpackshaker

I dreamed that Andy Devine was in a Sam Peckinpah Western.

Sep 9, 2017#500

PatrThom

At first glance saw "Andy Serkis" and thought, "...interesting."

--Patrick

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