On a whim question

Status
Not open for further replies.
A

Alucard

This may seem like on a whim question for many of you and for me it is as well. I have know problem meeting nice ladies in my area due to living on a college campus. Are they any social networking sites for college people or recommended dating sites? I guess I'm trying this as a social experiment as I said before on a whim. Still have a slight hangover from last night as well.
 
AshburnerX

AshburnerX

Facebook used to be the college social networking site until all the MySpace people switched to it an ruined it... or so I'm told anyway.

As for dating sites... I'm told Soulgeek is good.
 
ElJuski

ElJuski

Staff member
You live on a college campus--it's a living social networking site. Although college girls can get annoying REAL fast, there are still plenty of single and looking girls available every day, every hour.

My suggestion is that you join a club. There should be girls pertaining to your interests there. Or, you know, practice flirting and hanging out with girls on weekends. Much better than stuffy internet.
 
A

Alucard

I know thanks dude just seems that most of the nice girls I meet here are already taken lol so go figure. I know a lot of girls as friends jst was inquisitive thats all since I usually stay away from online social networking site. It was a stupid question I asked anyhoo.

I only joined facebook last fall so go figure haha
 
Gusto

Gusto

I eventually got me a girlfriend because a friend set me up with her.

My advice is to get and maintain as many friends as possible. If this means joining a club or getting to know people at work or school better, or taking up a new hobby or something, ten GO FOR IT.

Worst case scenario, you get a ton of friends. :)
 
ElJuski

ElJuski

Staff member
Yeah, that's essentially the best way to do it. If you're avidly seeking it, you'll end up jinxing yourself. But hey, a friend is a friend is a friend. Too many people view dating and relationships through the lens of sitcoms and romcoms. I know that's why I've fucked up enough times in the past.

But hey, whatever. Every weekend is a new adventure. Go out, have a few drinks, go see a band, join a club and meet some chicks.

Oh and dear god don't stalk women at subway
 
A

Alucard

Haha thats already the case man and i'm fine with everything jst was curious about the online part lol i'm already active in college already it was a fluke question i asked here
 
ElJuski

ElJuski

Staff member
Once again, I'm not implying anything about you. But you set up a thread for discussion dogg ~_~ kinda the consequence of opening a dialauge on something. If anything, let's consider this for the forum mouthbreathers that can't get themselves out there more.
 
doomdragon6

doomdragon6

Staff member
Definitely join a club. I joined an anime con planning club and made a buttload of friends that way. Oh. And got a girlfriend. :D
 
Troll

Troll

I agree with Gusto. For lack of a better term, start mining your friends as dating resources. Of course you want to be respectful while you do this, but your friends can introduce to more people, which could possibly lead to meeting girls.

If your heart is set on dating sites I'll second Soulgeek. I haven't tried it myself, but its tempting. I've heard good things about it.
 
CynicismKills

CynicismKills

A Troll said:
I agree with Gusto. For lack of a better term, start mining your friends as dating resources. Of course you want to be respectful while you do this, but your friends can introduce to more people, which could possibly lead to meeting girls.

If your heart is set on dating sites I'll second Soulgeek. I haven't tried it myself, but its tempting. I've heard good things about it.
Click to expand...
Friends of friends seems to be a great option, I moved out Atlanta way earlier this year and if it wasn't for my roommate and his girlfriend introducing me to some folks, I wouldn't know anyone but them. I'm still working on the setting me up part, but regardless of that it's a great way to just meet people in general.

Also, it helps with one's run-on sentences, apparently.
 
HoboNinja

HoboNinja

Ok didn't want to start a new thread so just posting here, if I am hijacking it too much let me know.

Basically I am a shy fuck and I am interested in this girl in my psych class.
I haven't really talked to her much, just some stuff like discussion in class.
I have never really done the whole flirting/asking out people I don't know type thing but apparently thats what all the big kids do :p.
But yeah what would be a good way for my to break the ice and talk to this girl and hopefully ask her to dinner or coffee or something. My friend's girlfriend told me I should ask her if she wants to study before the next test but thats like 3-4 weeks away and just seems so cliche heh.
 
D

Deschain

Step 1. Stop being a shy fuck.
Step 2. Talk to her.
Step 3. ???
Step 4. Bury the body.
Step 5. Confess on your death bed to a priest. Believe in Jesus.
Step 6. You're in Heaven! Congrats!
 
HoboNinja

HoboNinja

Deschain said:
Step 1. Stop being a shy fuck.
Click to expand...
Yeah everyone seems to think that I can just do that, like easy peasy. Yeah no, it doesn't work like that. But I will try to have a little courage and not be shy but yeah basically I am super social normally and talk a lot with tons of people, unless they are a girl I find attractive in which case I just like lock up. I can't talk, I can't think straight, I get the whole nervous lump in my throat, I usually just look down or away... I have some severe social anxiety when it comes to woman that I am interested in.
 
Gusto

Gusto

I getcha, Hobo, the solution to shyness is often the same as the solution to procrastination: Stop doing it. Not really helpful advice.

I guess it comes with practice. Getting more comfortable in social situations (through "practice", if you will) is key to getting over you lady anxiety, or at least it was in my case. By the time I met a girl with some mutual interest I was comfortable enough to talk to her fairly openly about it.

On my second date with my current girlfriend (before it was official) we actually had a conversation about how well the dating process was going so far.
 
D

Deschain

If you can get yourself to look down on people and keep the contempt out your voice, you can project an air of confidence. Or of arrogance. Try to keep it out of the ballpark of the second.
 
Dave

Dave

Staff member
The thing to realize is that everyone feels exactly the way you do at all times. We're all afraid of rejection, we're all afraid to talk to that cute girl/guy. The thing is, only you know the way that you feel! It's like public speaking - you may have messed up a few lines, but usually you are the only one who catches it. If you don't feel confident, fake confidence! That sounds really dumb, but people will react to what they see not to what you see in yourself.

Goferit, dood!
 
HoboNinja

HoboNinja

Ok so if I can get the balls to talk to her on wednesday in the next class where is a good place to like take someone you barely know you can talk? Coffee? Dinner? My friends and I are going haunted housing friday but I don't know if that would be the type of thing to invite someone to right off the bat. Maybe I could try to do coffee or something early friday and if it was to go well ask about the haunted house.
 
D

Deschain

If you don't feel confident, fake confidence!
Click to expand...
Yes, tell yourself you are the meanest, baddest motherfucker on this planet and people should be lucky to be near you. Let it give you confidence, not contempt.

Haunted House sounds fine, you could always be talking to a friend about it and ask her then. It'll let her know you're interested in her but by making it seem casual and getting more than one person involved you make it seem less like an 'actual date'.
 
Cajungal

Cajungal

Staff member
HoboNinja said:
Ok so if I can get the balls to talk to her on wednesday in the next class where is a good place to like take someone you barely know you can talk? Coffee? Dinner? My friends and I are going haunted housing friday but I don't know if that would be the type of thing to invite someone to right off the bat. Maybe I could try to do coffee or something early friday and if it was to go well ask about the haunted house.
Click to expand...
My immediate thought is always a cafe. I just think they're nice, mellow places (despite all the caffeine) where people can hang out naturally and get to know one another... either that or write their novels on laptops while nursing $2.00's worth of coffee.

/hypocrite

---------- Post added at 07:17 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:16 PM ----------

And Deschain's right---confidence! Even when you doubt yourself, don't let it come to the surface. Be aware of your posture; it often speaks louder than words.
 
ElJuski

ElJuski

Staff member
take her to a bar get her drunk and then FUCK THE PISS OUT OF HER.

I'm saying so bad she pees the bed, is what I'm saying.


Or, I don't know, a coffee shop or something. You're looking into things WAY TOO FUCKEN MUCH
 
HoboNinja

HoboNinja

Well im only 20 so I can't go to the bar :p

But yeah it is decided, I am going to ask her to coffee.

I need to just keep telling myself to stop being a pussy and talk to her.
 
G

GeneralOrder24

Shegokigo said:
The GF and I bounce between True and Adult Friend Finder.

Or were you looking more for relationship type stuff?
Click to expand...
If you find each other by accident, do you hook up like in the pina colada song?
 
D

Deschain

" But yeah it is decided, I am going to ask her to coffee."

Problem is you need to figure out what to talk about (between just you and her) for the time there. And if you don't know each other well yet it could be awkward because it'll play out just like a cheesy romance. I initially said to get to know her while out with your friends because there will always be some topic on hand to talk about and it won't be as awkward.

When you ask, you'll probably be scared and your voice will falter. Do not let this happen. You must be mentally reassured that her answer means nothing. If she says yes, that's cool beans. If she says no, then shit that's too bad then. Remember, you're casual. This isn't life or death.
 
HoboNinja

HoboNinja

Well I pretty much just hang out with my friends at the LAN center I used to work at heh... Sometimes we go to movies or drink at someones apartment or since its October go to haunted houses but I don't really see any of those situations being able to like ask her to hang out and go do that stuff and get to know her.
 
Cajungal

Cajungal

Staff member
HoboNinja said:
Well im only 20 so I can't go to the bar :p

But yeah it is decided, I am going to ask her to coffee.

I need to just keep telling myself to stop being a pussy and talk to her.
Click to expand...
Indeed. Locate thy balls and then sally forth and get some ladytypes. :D
 
ElJuski

ElJuski

Staff member
Chippy;278456][quote=HoboNinja said:
Well I pretty much just hang out with my friends at the LAN cent-
Click to expand...
Don't tell her this.[/QUOTE]

Hobo, I want you to pay for my way out to Iowa so I can make this date happen. You should also get Chippy to come out, so the two of us can work, commando style.

Also, you should tell her you are a philanthropist. But not a full-on rapist.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top