Rape Victim? Is because you dressed ungodly

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I didn't read the article, but reading (yesterday, I think) the title of this thread made me think how much of these kinds of ideas are trying to say rapists are innocents and how much really mean to scare parents and young girls so they don't dress up in certain ways? That is: Do the people that generate these messages really believe in them, or they are telling bogeyman stories to have people do certain things?
 

Green_Lantern

Staff member
I didn't read the article, but reading (yesterday, I think) the title of this thread made me think how much of these kinds of ideas are trying to say rapists are innocents and how much really mean to scare parents and young girls so they don't dress up in certain ways? That is: Do the people that generate these messages really believe in them, or they are telling bogeyman stories to have people do certain things?
I think the article itself explain this issue, blaming the victim is a way to deal with the fear of rape, essencially the thinking goes like this "The rape happened because of this. If I do this and don't do that I am safe", since this is a much happier though than "I can't really do much to avoid a rape attack" people prefer to think the former.

Of course, there is the... people, who do use these things to justify other points of views.
 
S

Steven Soderburgin

I'm tempted to make a big post about the rape culture and how the ideas in the pamphlet fit into a larger culture which attempts to minimize the horrors of rape in subtle and insidious ways but I'm not sure how well that would go over.
 
I'm tempted to make a big post about the rape culture and how the ideas in the pamphlet fit into a larger culture which attempts to minimize the horrors of rape in subtle and insidious ways but I'm not sure how well that would go over.
For what it's worth, I would be interested in that discussion.
 
I'm tempted to make a big post about the rape culture and how the ideas in the pamphlet fit into a larger culture which attempts to minimize the horrors of rape in subtle and insidious ways but I'm not sure how well that would go over.
For what it's worth, I would be interested in that discussion.[/QUOTE]

As would I, but as has been made clear in the homosexuality thread, I am a giant nerd.
 
I'm tempted to make a big post about the rape culture and how the ideas in the pamphlet fit into a larger culture which attempts to minimize the horrors of rape in subtle and insidious ways but I'm not sure how well that would go over.
For what it's worth, I would be interested in that discussion.[/QUOTE]

As would I, but as has been made clear in the homosexuality thread, I am a giant nerd.[/QUOTE]

You have my axe!
Hehe, sorry.
I'd be interested in reading such an article as well.
 
C

Chazwozel

I didn't read the article, but reading (yesterday, I think) the title of this thread made me think how much of these kinds of ideas are trying to say rapists are innocents and how much really mean to scare parents and young girls so they don't dress up in certain ways? That is: Do the people that generate these messages really believe in them, or they are telling bogeyman stories to have people do certain things?
I think the article itself explain this issue, blaming the victim is a way to deal with the fear of rape, essencially the thinking goes like this "The rape happened because of this. If I do this and don't do that I am safe", since this is a much happier though than "I can't really do much to avoid a rape attack" people prefer to think the former.

Of course, there is the... people, who do use these things to justify other points of views.[/QUOTE]

Funny enough, that's pretty much how religion deals with all issues that are completely out of a person's control.
 
S

Steven Soderburgin

Okay, so I'm going to post a couple things about rape culture, including some recent examples of what it looks like. It's a term that has been circulating in feminism for a while now.

Here is a definition from the book "Transforming a Rape Culture"
A rape culture is a complex of beliefs that encourages male sexual aggression and supports violence against women. It is a society where violence is seen as sexy and sexuality as violent. In a rape culture women perceive a continuum of threatened violence that ranges from sexual remarks to sexual touching to rape itself. A rape culture condones physical and emotional terrorism against women as the norm.

In a rape culture both men and women assume that sexual violence is a fact of life, inevitable as death or taxes. This violence, however, is neither biologically nor divinely ordained. Much of what we accept as inevitable is in fact the expression of values and attitudes that can change.
So what does that mean? The pamphlet that this thread is originally about is a good example: women should not be sexual, should not desire sex, and should hide and be ashamed of their sexuality because if they don't, then men will not be able to control themselves. This victim blaming is a part of the rape culture, because there are many people who entertain the thought that women who are raped are responsible for it because they either dressed immodestly, or they were drinking, or they have had sex with their rapist before. The rapist is just a man who couldn't control himself, so he is excused while the woman is demonized for bringing this horror upon herself.

Another example
from Washington City Paper's "The Sexist" blog, regarding the reaction Hofstra University student who accused 5 men of tying her up and gang-raping her, and then recanting her accusation, admitting that she had consented:
I can’t recall how many times I’ve seen a discussion of a rape accusation devolve into the one side arguing why the accuser should be believed, and the other side arguing that the accuser should be discredited. Another common point of argument I find frustrating—what percentage of rape claims are genuine, and what percentage are false? Most of the time, we, armchair rape analysts, launch into these arguments before we have any actual idea whether a particular person has raped another person. In most cases, we will never know. What we do know, all the time, is that rape is a problem, and false rape accusations are a problem. The meaningless squabbles between the two camps tend to overlook the fact that people concerned about rape and people concerned about fake rape accusations are both fighting against the same thing: rape culture.

Rape culture does not just encourage men to proceed after she says “no.” Rape culture does not simply teach men that a lack of physical resistance is an invitation. Rape culture does not only tell men to assert ownership over whichever female body they desire. Rape culture also tells women not to claim ownership over their own bodies. Rape culture also informs women that they should not desire sex. Rape culture also tells women that saying yes makes them bad women.

Both rape and rape accusations are products of the roles assigned by rape culture. In the traditional seduction scenario, a woman is expected to not desire to have sex, and to only submit after the man has successfully coerced her into submission. When the preferred model for consensual sex looks a hell of a lot like rape, an array of fucked-up scenarios are inevitable: the woman never wanted to fuck the guy, refuses to submit, and is raped; the woman submits to the man’s coercion in order to avoid other negative consequences (like being raped); the woman had desired the sex all along, but must defend her femininity by saying that she had been coerced into sex. Thankfully, a good deal of modern men and women reject these antiquated ideas, but they’re far from being banished from the sexual landscape. Especially when that landscape involves four men, one woman, and freshman year of college.
Here is one reaction to that incident from Men's News Daily:
In what has become a more or less common turn of events, the female Hofstra University student that accused five men, including one classmate, of gang raping her in a school dormitory bathroom has recanted the charges. That’s legal and media speak for admitting she cheapened herself by taking on five men willingly on a men’s room floor and lied about it later out of what little capacity for shame she had.
Notice that not only does he shame her for lying about being raped - which is fine, because she should never have done that - but he also shames her for consenting to have sex with these five men in the first place. In comments posted on blogs and news editorials, she is not characterized as a liar, but rather as a whore. The five men aren't shamed at all. Why? Because it's okay for men to have sexual encounters with 5 other people but not for women?


In an example that is relevant to some recent events, last summer, a woman accused football player Ben Roethlisberger of raping her at a Lake Tahoe resort. Now, the case was dropped due to an affidavit from a woman who knew the alleged victim in which she swore that the woman was not traumatized or unhappy about the incident, and no claims of rape were heard when she spoke of it until she filed the lawsuit.

That's not the important part. What's important is that ESPN employees were told not to cover the story
A media source tells us that, late last night, ESPN issued a \\\\"do not report\\\\" memo to all of its outlets and reporters. The directive came without explanation. \\\\"Even some of the reporters are wondering why,\\\\" the source said, \\\\"but haven't been told.\\\\"
No matter their reasons for not covering the story (a decision that was later reversed), the fact that they chose not to cover it despite it being a rather important story about a prominent sports figure is disturbing. It's clear that ESPN was perfectly willing to minimize and suppress reporting that a major sports figure had allegedly raped a woman. One could infer that they were excusing the alleged behavior - a rape of a young woman - because he is a big enough star.


Another example: the recent report that the Washington, D.C. police department refused to provide a rape kit to a woman who was too drunk/drugged to remember what happened, and because she did not know the last name of the person she suspected, despite being in severe physical pain and missing her panty liner. Her suspicion that she was raped was not taken seriously, and as a result, she will never know if she was raped and if she was, she will never see her day in court.

It's important to note that being blackout drunk does not excuse rape. Rape is still rape even if a person is blacked out. In most states, a person who is intoxicated cannot give legal consent for sex.

There are many, many other examples and lots of other issues that are part of this. I haven't even touched on things like the vast under-reporting of female-to-male rape, of the way prison rape is perceived and talked about in our society, etc. It's a large idea.

It's also important to note that many prominent feminist figures disagree with the notion of a rape culture, arguing that rape is one part of a much larger and much more entrenched culture of violence, particularly violence against women.

So, uh, yeah, that's my big post. Hopefully, this gives folks plenty to chew on.
 
This reminds me of a fight I had with a friend a few years back. I was dating a girl in college, and she volunteered to become a Rape Prevention Counselor at her school. Basically they trained students to give workshops about respecting women's rights, how to avoid dangerous situations ("don't let strangers make your drinks," and so on), and informed women of various services and support that they might need.

Anyway, my buddy asks what she's been up to. I tell him that my girlfriend gives workshops as a Rape Prevention Counselor. Before I can explain, he cuts me off by saying "So, she teaches women how to dress properly? Or tells sluts how to keep their legs closed?" I just stood there with my jaw dropped. I immediately told him to go fuck himself and threatened to beat his ass, and he backed off. That was the first time I really realized some people, even those who may seem otherwise open-minded and intelligent, have some really fucked up ideas about sex and rape.
 
I didn't read the article, but reading (yesterday, I think) the title of this thread made me think how much of these kinds of ideas are trying to say rapists are innocents and how much really mean to scare parents and young girls so they don't dress up in certain ways? That is: Do the people that generate these messages really believe in them, or they are telling bogeyman stories to have people do certain things?
I think the article itself explain this issue, blaming the victim is a way to deal with the fear of rape, essencially the thinking goes like this "The rape happened because of this. If I do this and don't do that I am safe", since this is a much happier though than "I can't really do much to avoid a rape attack" people prefer to think the former.

Of course, there is the... people, who do use these things to justify other points of views.[/QUOTE]

Funny enough, that's pretty much how religion deals with all issues that are completely out of a person's control.[/QUOTE]

This is one of the aspects of religiuon that I always thought were bullshit. But, of course, there's plenty of people who generate these kinds of messages inside the catholic church, for example that do really believe in them. and people who use them to manipulate others into doing what they think is right, even if they don't actually believe what they are saying.
And people who don't believe those ideas and use them for personal objectives.

This kind of distinctions are one topic I always like to reflect upon, even if it's very hard to get to some satisfying answer.
 
C

Chazwozel

I didn't read the article, but reading (yesterday, I think) the title of this thread made me think how much of these kinds of ideas are trying to say rapists are innocents and how much really mean to scare parents and young girls so they don't dress up in certain ways? That is: Do the people that generate these messages really believe in them, or they are telling bogeyman stories to have people do certain things?
I think the article itself explain this issue, blaming the victim is a way to deal with the fear of rape, essencially the thinking goes like this "The rape happened because of this. If I do this and don't do that I am safe", since this is a much happier though than "I can't really do much to avoid a rape attack" people prefer to think the former.

Of course, there is the... people, who do use these things to justify other points of views.[/QUOTE]

Funny enough, that's pretty much how religion deals with all issues that are completely out of a person's control.[/QUOTE]

This is one of the aspects of religiuon that I always thought were bullshit. But, of course, there's plenty of people who generate these kinds of messages inside the catholic church, for example that do really believe in them. and people who use them to manipulate others into doing what they think is right, even if they don't actually believe what they are saying.
And people who don't believe those ideas and use them for personal objectives.

This kind of distinctions are one topic I always like to reflect upon, even if it's very hard to get to some satisfying answer.[/QUOTE]

Most religions are pretty much there as a way for human beings to cope with the ultimate things that are out of our control: fate and death.

---------- Post added at 10:38 AM ---------- Previous post was at 10:38 AM ----------

This reminds me of a fight I had with a friend a few years back. I was dating a girl in college, and she volunteered to become a Rape Prevention Counselor at her school. Basically they trained students to give workshops about respecting women's rights, how to avoid dangerous situations ("don't let strangers make your drinks," and so on), and informed women of various services and support that they might need.

Anyway, my buddy asks what she's been up to. I tell him that my girlfriend gives workshops as a Rape Prevention Counselor. Before I can explain, he cuts me off by saying "So, she teaches women how to dress properly? Or tells sluts how to keep their legs closed?" I just stood there with my jaw dropped. I immediately told him to go fuck himself and threatened to beat his ass, and he backed off. That was the first time I really realized some people, even those who may seem otherwise open-minded and intelligent, have some really fucked up ideas about sex and rape.
No you didn't.
 
This reminds me of a fight I had with a friend a few years back. I was dating a girl in college, and she volunteered to become a Rape Prevention Counselor at her school. Basically they trained students to give workshops about respecting women's rights, how to avoid dangerous situations ("don't let strangers make your drinks," and so on), and informed women of various services and support that they might need.

Anyway, my buddy asks what she's been up to. I tell him that my girlfriend gives workshops as a Rape Prevention Counselor. Before I can explain, he cuts me off by saying "So, she teaches women how to dress properly? Or tells sluts how to keep their legs closed?" I just stood there with my jaw dropped. I immediately told him to go fuck himself and threatened to beat his ass, and he backed off. That was the first time I really realized some people, even those who may seem otherwise open-minded and intelligent, have some really fucked up ideas about sex and rape.
No you didn't.[/QUOTE]

I believe the exact phrase was "Go fuck yourself. You say shit like that one more time I will beat your ass."

But hey, since you were there why don't you tell me what I actually said. Go right ahead.
 
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