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Wasabi Poptart
What exactly is "grieving correctly"?
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Cobra Star
My point is suddenly invalidated due to bad spelling at a terrible early hour post. 
I never said there wasn't more options Tin. I'm simply stating the situations I would feel would be wrong. I'm not even talking about the OP anymore.
I never said there wasn't more options Tin. I'm simply stating the situations I would feel would be wrong. I'm not even talking about the OP anymore.
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Chazwozel
I don't think the dead person has any sway on having their last wishes followed through on, so no there really are no situations were a family can't grieve the way they want to. The only thing I can think of would be despute amongst living relatives as to what that person would want if it wasn't expressed during their lifetime, which invalidates that whole "selfish" request nonsense.My point is suddenly invalidated due to bad spelling at a terrible early hour post.
I never said there wasn't more options Tin. I'm simply stating the situations I would feel would be wrong. I'm not even talking about the OP anymore.
I don't think it's a matter of spelling...My point is suddenly invalidated due to bad spelling at a terrible early hour post.
I never said there wasn't more options Tin. I'm simply stating the situations I would feel would be wrong. I'm not even talking about the OP anymore.
Actually, that's pretty much exactly what you said.
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Cobra Star
There obviously has been alot lost in the multiple responses to all sides I'll clear it up:
If the family wanted this. Great. (Yes we've established the family didn't mind, it's become hypothetical now)
If the family didn't mind this. Great.
If he wanted it done and they didn't do it. Selfish as they would feel guilty.
If he wanted it done and they did it, though they didn't want to out of guilt. Selfish as they would suffer.
That's it. That's the only points I was making. How it got this far with words being put in my mouth, I have no idea.
If the family wanted this. Great. (Yes we've established the family didn't mind, it's become hypothetical now)
If the family didn't mind this. Great.
If he wanted it done and they didn't do it. Selfish as they would feel guilty.
If he wanted it done and they did it, though they didn't want to out of guilt. Selfish as they would suffer.
That's it. That's the only points I was making. How it got this far with words being put in my mouth, I have no idea.
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Chazwozel
And we've been trying to tell you that a dead person has no say in the matter and that 100% of the time families mourn the best way they're able to as much as possible.
I'll get personal here. When my grandfather died, he wanted to be buried in Poland. We couldn't afford that sort of trip so it was compromised to a Polish cemetery in the U.S. It was not a selfish request for him to ask this, nor did anyone in my family feel guilty about the conclusion that was decided upon. The only thing people felt bad about was that he was gone. People don't feel bad about final wishes not being resolved because the person who's dead isn't there to complain about it.
Your last two points aren't valid points because it just doesn't happen. The only gray area is when family members disagree among themselves how things should be handled. The dead person has no sway whatsoever over the guilt and arrangement of their funeral.
Who are you to judge what is the correct way to grieve? Everyone handles it differently.
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Chazwozel
It's hardly a selfish thing to request final wishes though.
When I go, I want to be propped up at a party... Like Errol Flynn
Then cremated, and stuffed into a used computer case...
I'll add more later.
Then cremated, and stuffed into a used computer case...
I'll add more later.
This argument is hilarious. Now, we need the thread to turn into something completely different, and then locked and it'll have the official HF Stamp.
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Chazwozel
I want to be stuffed and put next to my wife's bed. When you pull my finger a pre-recorded fart plays.
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Wasabi Poptart
When I die, I want to be have animatronics put in my body, LEDs inserted in place of my eyeballs, and a motion sensor in my head so I can be like one of those life-sized Halloween witches.
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Soliloquy
But guys! if your family doesn't grieve correctly, your spirit won't find it's way to the afterlife! You'll be doomed to wander the earth for all eternity!
:aaahhh:
:aaahhh:
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Cobra Star
Seriously Soliloquy? That was necessary?
I've seen jerk posts here for years, but that's down right directly jackassry.
I've seen jerk posts here for years, but that's down right directly jackassry.
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Soliloquy
Methinks someone has thin skin. Didn't really mean offense by it.
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Soliloquy
man... it's bugging me now. Maybe I was being out of line and didn't realize it.
Was I being out of line, guys? I kind of feel like a jerk now.
Was I being out of line, guys? I kind of feel like a jerk now.
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Cobra Star
I'm pretty thick skinned, but I was being relatively serious in this thread. Then it got berating for no reason. I know HF loves to take things off topic, but to be directly negative like that is something new or reserved for Neon Grew or Mav. Guess I know what "club" I'm in.
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Cobra Star
You're right, I *was* thinking about it in terms of what I'm familiar with. That what I was basing my response and opinion on.
See, guys? His argument isn't hollow logic or even him being damn stupid. He's just ethnocentric.
BTW, there's no "club". Mav doesn't get berated because people want someone to pick on. Mav gets berated because he says dumb, dumb things. You're saying dumb things, so you're being berated.
And I can't help but wonder if Soliloquy's joke was so far from the truth.
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Philosopher B.
I don't see it.
When you start telling people that are experiencing one of the most personal, individual things they can go through, that they're doing it wrong, it means that you're being an utter pillock. What next, walking into a maternity ward and telling the laboring moms-to-be that they're not giving birth correctly?
Why am I gay in every hypothetically-proposed alternate reality!?
Maybe this is just the only specific universe in which I am straight.
Now let's see dem juggs.
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Cobra Star
See, guys? His argument isn't hollow logic or even him being damn stupid. He's just ethnocentric.
BTW, there's no "club". Mav doesn't get berated because people want someone to pick on. Mav gets berated because he says dumb, dumb things. You're saying dumb things, so you're being berated.
And I can't help but wonder if Soliloquy's joke was so far from the truth.[/QUOTE]
Except I wasn't saying "dumb things". People were putting words and meanings in my mouth that I was not expressing, which were dumb.
I simply stated that if that was done against the wishes of the family, it's messed up and selfish.
I can't believe it got so far away from that by other people.
See, guys? His argument isn't hollow logic or even him being damn stupid. He's just ethnocentric.
BTW, there's no "club". Mav doesn't get berated because people want someone to pick on. Mav gets berated because he says dumb, dumb things. You're saying dumb things, so you're being berated.
And I can't help but wonder if Soliloquy's joke was so far from the truth.[/QUOTE]
Except I wasn't saying "dumb things". People were putting words and meanings in my mouth that I was not expressing, which were dumb.
I simply stated that if that was done against the wishes of the family, it's messed up and selfish.
I can't believe it got so far away from that by other people.[/QUOTE]
That may be what you meant, but what you said was something about "grieving correctly", which implies that the family in question wasn't. Everyone grieves differently, so there is no "correct" grieving. I'm guessing it's not the way you'd show grief, but you are not the universal standard of loss.
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Cobra Star
I've been around the forums plenty long enough to know that calling someone out on "stupid shit" and being overall jackass about the response are two different things. Reserved usually for people like JCM/Chaz etc.
Not the regular populace. Surprise surprise though.
Not the regular populace. Surprise surprise though.
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Chazwozel
No. I jump on people for being stupid or when they decide to bring my name up like you just did, but I'll admit it when I'm wrong. End of story. Welcome to the forums douchebag. All you have to do is admit you were wrong and said something stupid and everyone will back off. Defending an empty position makes you look dumb.
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