I consider Twilight to be 'chick porn'. That's not to say that chicks don't dig actual porn, but books like twilight and romance novels cater to a deep seated primal need in many women much like hot sweaty fake-tittied sluts slapping uglies with average looking joes caters to a deep seated primal need in many men.
Chicks react to the guy who plays Edward much the way I might react to Asia Carerra
And as much as I like to imagine that this story is satire, it actually hits very close to the reason why my last wife became my ex-wife.
this this this this this
and this
Romance novels and chick flicks are total chick bait, because it oversimplifies romance (read: gives a woman's view of romance) where the guy equivalent oversimplifies, well...
Like where's the scene in Twighlight where Edward comes home from a crappy day at work where he got chewed out by his boss for not killing a werewolf, and of course it wasn't even his fault, Henderson didn't come in (again.) Then there's the crap going on in accounting, they have wasted 2 weeks of hist time arguing for him to justify a 500$ purchase of blood which (based on his salary) wasted a good 2k in labor. And he sits there questioning if his life (or unlife) actually adds anything to the world, if the first 2 centuries of his existence have been wasted and all he has to look forward to is a gold watch and a crappy dinner at Chili's. And then he comes home. He wants a beer (or a michelada or whatever the fuck vampire's drink) and just wants to watch the game (bloodbowl!)
And there's Bella. It's not that he doesn't love her, but he's so tired. He's just so tired. And all he wants is to just go into his coffin and go to sleep and not think about his failures. And then she tears into him because he forgot to bring home some human food for her, and it's all he can do to not just walk out that door, but he doesn't, because he loves her, so he just sits there with his eyes on the game. But all she see's is another lazy vampire layabout, and she tells him so. So he leaves the room, and as he looks back through the doorway at her and see's all the anger, all the difficulties in communication, and finally realizes how alone he is and always will be, he decides to walk out that front door into the sunlight and end it all.
But of course then he just glitters.
Where's that scene?