Gas Bandit's list of fun pastimes, page 7:
-Go to Walmart, find frozen fish, discard in women's underwear section
-Piss on a plate and freeze it. Then slide the frozen piss disc under doors.
-Release three pigs into a police station with the numbers "1", "2" and "4" painted on their sides.
-Pour talcum powder in the opening of a hair dryer.
-Swap the bags inside cereal boxes at the grocery. Super glue them shut. Grapenuts goes well in Coco puffs boxes.
-Never say "I think you have the wrong number." Ask "Are you a friend of the family? I have some very bad news . . ."
- Lab coats are relatively inexpensive, and well worth the respect you are given in hospitals by trusting strangers.
-Black electrical tape covers the little light sensors on auto-flushing toilets really well.
-Print and hang signs saying "Elevator under service, please use stairs" on tall buildings.
-Set all clocks you can get a hold of back by one hour. Or, in a store with lots of clocks on display, set all their alarms to go off at 10 minute intervals.
-Rearrange Nativity Scenes to have a different narrative. The story of Sodom and Gomorrah is important, but doesn't have a holiday.
-Put cut live public Christmas Trees out of their misery. Put a cup of salt into the water in their base.
-Help make Xmas extra special this year. Hang "out of order" signs on all the mall bathroom stalls this December 23rd.
- Leave a forged memo describing the closing / bankruptcy of your office on the office photocopier. Include names/dates
-When dining at a restaurant, claim to have lost you phone. Leave while staff is searching.
-Order a drink for the hottest woman in the bar and have the bartender tell her it's from the lonely guy in the corner.
-Hire hookers and force them to read a book and fill out job applications. "Hey, I paid for a whole hour, bitch!"
- Put Slayer CDs in Justin Bieber CD cases