The Random Crap Thread 2: It Hits the Fan.

[Terrik]

The only bad thing about bananas are the spiders that hide in them.

 

[Cajungal]

Wh.... what?

 

[GasBandit]

Phoneutria, commonly known as Brazilian wandering spiders, armed spiders ("aranhas-armadeiras", as they are known inPortuguese), or banana spiders (not to be confused with the relatively harmless species of the genus Nephila), are a genus of defensive and highly venomous spiders found in tropical South and Central America. These spiders are members of the Ctenidae family of wandering spiders.

The Brazilian wandering spiders appeared in Guinness World Records 2012 as the world's most venomous spider.

Wandering spiders are so-called because they wander the jungle floor at night, rather than residing in a lair or maintaining a web. During the day they hide inside termite mounds, under fallen logs and rocks, and in banana plants and bromeliads. P. nigriventer is known to hide in dark and moist places in or near human dwellings.

and in banana plants

in banana plants

IN BANANA PLANTS

 

[Cajungal]

But I don't want the spiders.

 

[fade]

Further down the same article on Wikipedia:

Aside from causing intense pain, the venom of the spider can also cause priapism in humans. Erections resulting from the bite are uncomfortable, can last for many hours and can lead to impotence.
...

Venom from wandering spider injected in human body can lead to death within 2-12 hours. The venom induces release of nitric oxide which acts as a dilating agent and arteries and veins are dilated, it is then followed by increased blood flow in penis and results in a long duration penile erection

 

[Allen who is Quiet]

spiders

 

[Cheesy1]

Damn Fade, you beat me to it! So yeah, if they don't kill you, you'll wish they had!

 

[GasBandit]

 

[HCGLNS]

Well looky here if it ain't the two space faggots that dinged the fuckmobile!

 

[Officer_Charon]

 

[Terrik]

I..I appear to be looking at him. ALL HAIL MY CHITINOUS OVERLORD. DEATH TO THE UNBELIEVERS.

 

[Officer_Charon]

So, this happened. (NSFW) The world has just become a better place.

As a corollary, this also happened.... not quite as epic, but still most interesting.

 

[makare]

Well if you weren't shitting before you sure would be now....

 

[drifter]

Spiders, eh?

Spoiler: Super NSFW and also NSFL

Spoiler: For realsies do not click if you value your sanity

 

[Officer_Charon]

Hmm.... sure is /d/ in here, all of a sudden

 

[fade]

Pojodan?

 

[Terrik]

OH GOD.

OHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGOD

 

[fade]

was that fear, or the soundtrack?

 

[Officer_Charon]

Dammit fade, you owe me a detailing of my patrol car. I prefer my coffee internally, ffs!

 

[LittleSin]

Fuck fuck FUCK.

Why the fuck did I click on that?!

I have been so good lately, not clicking on spoilered images. I learned my lesson long ago when Gas Bandit posted the gif with squids or some shit coming out of her ass.

Why the fuck did I break my own rule?

I must hate myself.

 

[makare]

gaaah

 

[LittleSin]

Like, seriuosly guys. I opened that spoiler and it was closed in less then a second.

My husband felt my whole body jump from his side of the couch.

I had to close the lap top, take off my glasses, and verbally berate myself for being and idiots and ask a God I don't believe in why this exist.

WHAT THE FUCK.

 

[Cheesy1]

And HOW long have you been posting here at Halforums, Sin?

 

[Terrik]

What has been seen, cannot be unseen.

This will haunt me forever.

 

[LittleSin]

And HOW long have you been posting here at Halforums, Sin?

I deserve that. I have told myself I deserve everything my curiosity has wrought upon me.

It still doesn't make the "GYAAAAHWHATHEFUCKIWANTTODIENOW" go away.

 

[Cheesy1]

Don't worry, Sin. It'll happen again, it always does. Because we NEVER learn!

 

[drifter]

was that fear, or the soundtrack?

 

[makare]

Well the not funny pics thread makes me wish we could ignore threads...

 

[LittleSin]

Well the not funny pics thread makes me wish we could ignore threads...

I know that feeling.

I might make an awesome thread to counteract it's effects. I don't have many awesome images though.

 

[Officer_Charon]

Seriously, /d/eviancy must have ruined my soul, because I barely reacted beyond "Oh, well THAT'S different."

 

[Shegokigo]

"Just don't click on the thread, I don't see what the big deal is" - makare.

 

[SeraRelm]

not funny thread has awesome images in it too. like.. THIS ONE!

The horror...

 

[makare]

Is that alton brown? That bastard can eat my ass.


You know what would be better than ignoring threads would be to rename it so I could enlarge the NOT funny part. I keep accidentally clicking it and seeing horrible things. It makes me sad. I think we could rename threads on our own screen once. Maybe that was a different forum.

 

[Officer_Charon]

Makare, what's your beef with Alton?

 

[makare]

I don't want to get into it but I have gone from loving him to knowing that he is an ass. Now I don't want anything to do with him or his shows.